|
the 2001 jack black/gwyniff paltrow film shallow hall is on my friend's tv right now. we've been watching since it started, and the film is almost over (hal is about to crash the party to declare his love for the rosemary lady who isn't thin (even tho she isn't thin) because he has become a Good Man now). this movie is pretty odd, and even at the time gwenyff paltrow in a "fatsuit" was off-putting and rude and in the parlance of today the film is called probl-o-matic by people in blog posts and cereal based restaurants. many people have very unfriendly words to say about this movie today and consider it a bad and rude movie. HOWEVER.... i didn't really remember much about it other than george cantstandya's tail. based upon the internet i was expecting something offensive like Ace Ventura's transphobic reaction to kissing the madame from One Eyed Jack's whilst she possessed a weiner because she was actually a sportsman in diguise as a lady and as a kid you go "haha gross" and laugh as ace burned his clothing and cried in the shower. this scene in hindsight is offensive and bad even if it's supposed to be a crying game spoof type thing and even if such scenes were not a big fucken deal in the 90s. we know better today and using a toilet plunger on your face to suck the vomit up from your belly because you found out the person you kissed is transgender is an unacceptable bigoted reaction from anyone, pet detective or no, excellent hairdo or no speaking of the crying game, shallow hal (which was NOT like that ace ventura scene) referenced the film directly in a good positive way. it's just one of the numerous things in the film that actually seems pretty good or progressive especially for 2001. if you don't remember the movie, noted Frankenstein and motivator of men Tim Robbins corners a pathetic man in an elevator and hypnotizes the extremely shallow possible incel (Jack Black) so that he no longer sees reality, but instead he hallucinates whenever he looks at a person. now he only sees people's outsides as reflections of their insides: (metaphorically inside, not their actual, like, organs and guts) the inner beauty of people becomes outer beauty. so as jack "the titular hal" black resumes his shallow skirt chasing with his also shallow friend George Costanza (wearing black paint on his head to disguise his baldness) and the two hit the club to do their whole internet guy style "eww check out the dry skin on that chicks elbow that is gross 1/10 would not gently caress bro" schtick, jack suddenly finds himself drowning in hot ladies. encouraged when these apparently attractive women do not dismiss him out of hand despite being clearly waaaay out of his league, he chats up and flirts with more and more women, seeing all these nice and good but physically unappealing or grotesque women as extremely hot and not grody and weird. costanza is disgusted by Jack's behavior, being nice to obese women, and dancing with them, etc. but jack is happy because he's scoring with hotties despite being jack black pre-School of Rock. eventually he even meets the hottest hottie, gwenov paltrow: another irl rotund gal appearing thin to him, who he wins over by treating her better than she's used to being treated considering her rotundity/rotundness/etc and how skeeved out dudes usually get by women her size. there are jokes about jack being confused by enormous panties coming off the very thin paltrow, or a running gag about the skinny paltrow constantly breaking seats and chairs as they collapse beneath her. she looks like her skinny self to jack but is irl actually very morbidly obese (depicted by paltrow in a lady version of Mike Meyers "fat bastard" suit) so everyone else sees an obese lady destroying furniture, but jack sees her as a beautiful thin lady because inside she's a good person and good is hot and skinny, not fat. he is bewildered by the shoddy craftsmanship of today's chairs. eventually costanza has had enough of his friend falling in love with a fat woman and he uses a special password that breaks Jack's brainwashing and Jack Black sees the truth, that all his hot lady friends are either obese or have gross faces, and all the hunky guys who made him insecure and jealous are actually disabled or hawaiian. even the cute lil hospitalized girl he befriended at some point while I was texting I guess because i don't remember that bit is actually in a burn unit and has freddy krueger skin. at first he's weirded out and doesn't know what to do, besides avoiding paltrow so he won't have to see her as a fat person. then he goes "hey i love her and dont care what she looks like, remember the crying game? that dude fell in love with that lady and found out she was trans and it didn't matter to him because he loved her and that's what matters and i love that paltrow so im gonna stop being a dick and go see her" and costanza admits that he's also a dick then he drops trou and reveals a nubby tail like a hairless doberman tail, wagging awesomely. jack black tells him "hey women like puppies and i bet they'll like you too" because what else can you say? then he goes to see paltrow with his unbrainwashed eyes and still finds her beautiful as she is (obese) and we all learn that peoples looks aren't everything and being a good person is what's important and everyone has value, not just physically attractive people. so yeah there was the whole fatsuit thing and a few jokes about obesity vs. furniture and how the panties of obese women resemble boat sails, which aged poorly and were lovely jokes then too i guess. frequently attacked is the whole "these good people only become worthy of being treated as equals when they stop looking like themselves and appear conventionally attractive" thing, which people criticize the movie for. but I dunno, it didn't seem that way to me, I feel like they missed the point entirely. that may be visually how they show jack learning his lesson, by treating people better because they appear more attractive until he learns that they're not, they're just good people, and they always deserved to be treated well. his lesson is that treating pretty people better is a lovely thing to do, so he stops doing it and treats everyone better because he stops judging people on their looks. his change in heart even applies to trans acceptance. that's becoming more common now fortunately but i don't remember it happening in mainstream stuff that long ago, in 2001. with total sincerity he uses the crying game as a case in point as to why paltrows true weight is irrelevant because he loves her, same as the fella from the crying game. costanza says something like "honestly it would probably be easier on you if a hairy pair of testicles was all she had" since at this point Jack has not seen her true size yet. it's played like a joke I guess, but the irredeemable shithead of the film saying "youd probably find it easier to deal with a bepenised paltrow, that's how massive she actually is" doesn't point towards the line being something the audience is expected to agree with, but rather evidence of how lovely the character is in case we forgot they handle some of the more sensitive poo poo pretty well in this movie, like the reveal of the kruegerface child. or like when his brainwashing is first broken some conventionally attractive lady restaurant hostess is revealed to be a transgendered women with what would be considered still very masculine features and unlike most media it's not played as a gag or something, it's just to demonstrate how his perception has changed and at no point does it feel like you're meant to find it funny or weird or anything. i suppose it could be considered poor taste, as her features are deliberately very masculine in appearance to highlight the contrast between reality and how jack black perceived her. but i thought this scene, showing a transperson who has difficulty "passing" being seen as an ideal example of the gender they identify as because they're a good person with inner beauty and are unambiguously shown to be the gender they identify as, to me it seemed like a good tasteful thing. if im wrong please let me know why because, as ive found in this life, its good to learn and adjust to new truths and not allow good intentions to justify misguided attitudes or beliefs. sso yeah the fatsuit wasnt a good move and maybe a better idea would have been making separate actresses portraying the "real" rosemary and hal's boner inducing hallucination so an actual fat person could have been cast and portrayed Rosemary's true obese self instead of a skinny idiot con-artist lady in a fat person costume who gets to rip the fatsuit off and reveal her actual skinny gorgeousness when she stops portraying the fat lady and starts portraying inner beauty personified. i get why that's uncool. and the running gag of busted chairs is mean spirited I guess, even if its humorous to see jack being like "  how do you keep breaking chairs wtf???" im ok with the big underwear gag too because skinny paltrow removing her panties and tossing them to jack and breaking jacks brain as the panties have suddenly grown fifty times larger was a good sight gag and and the humor wasn't directed at her weight, like a "haha get it? she's fat and that means her clothes are huge and that's funny", it didn't feel mean spirited like that. and the movie beats us over the head with the moral that goodness is more important than appearance and being shallow sucks and it's good that jack realized what a jerk he'd been and became a better person. I can forgive a few fat jokes in a 17 year old film that otherwise goes to great pains to demonstrate a number of good and progressive attitudes towards how we treat others. i found the film worthy of my viewing time as well as the many minutes spent thinking, typing, proofreading, editing and finally posting this thread shallow hal is good.
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:16
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 02:54 |
|
|
Jesus Christ, OP. e: Ok I actually read it and that's not a bad review at all. The morbidly obese deserve shaming though. Unless they're children in which case their parents need shaming. Nurge fucked around with this message at 12:31 on May 21, 2018 |
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:17
|
|
|
I don't like Jack Black specifically because of that movie. His character is incredibly annoying.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:22
|
|
|
I liked your post
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:24
|
|
|
It's been a while since I saw that movie but if I remember right the inner side thing goes both ways, so he sees one woman who is outwardly beautiful but is toxic and smokes as a wrinkled prune or something?
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:29
|
|
|
Lots of words about a lovely comedy from 2001 that I didn't read
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:47
|
|
|
P good review op, can't say I had strong feelings on the film but you've definitely cast it in a better light than it currently receives
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 12:55
|
|
|
Gatekeeper posted:shallow hal is good.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:07
|
|
|
As much as one might hate the actual movie, I think the trailers for this movie were far worse.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:18
|
|
|
What i don't understand about shallow hal is why the portly jack black was cast in what was clearly an early 2000's Ryan Reynolds vehicle
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:27
|
|
|
Film would have worked better if it were a magic curse because if he is just hypnotised then how can he "see" someone's inner beauty at a glance like in the club or whatever. They gloss this over by having the women he talks to "acting nervous" or some poo poo, but I don't buy it. Not one bit. Attractive people can look nervous too.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:36
|
|
|
BONE DOG posted:What i don't understand about shallow hal is why the portly jack black was cast in what was clearly an early 2000's Ryan Reynolds vehicle Reynolds is a handsome man and would just be shagging other attractive people anyway.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:39
|
|
|
I liked this movie too. Despite how awkward the premise sounds it's actually pretty forward-facing for 2001.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:40
|
|
|
Shallow Hal is HAES Propaganda
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 13:53
|
|
|
The actual really stupid poo poo is the idea that all ugly/unconventional people are beautiful on the inside and all beautiful people are ugly on the inside.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 14:01
|
|
|
Perry Mason Jar posted:The actual really stupid poo poo is the idea that all ugly/unconventional people are beautiful on the inside and all beautiful people are ugly on the inside. Yeah, this as well. Should have been a magic spell. Would have covered this too.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 14:04
|
|
|
BONE DOG posted:What i don't understand about shallow hal is why the portly jack black was cast in what was clearly an early 2000's Ryan Reynolds vehicle Fat people should date other fat people, important life lessons
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 14:20
|
|
|
How does he know these people have inner beauty? Like, his brain has never been these people, but somehow knows which ones are nice or not and makes on the fly decisions to make them either attractive or not. That kid in the burn ward could have been the one who started the fire for all we know.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 14:23
|
|
|
Gatekeeper posted:Jack Black sees the truth, that all his hot lady friends are either obese or have gross faces, and all the hunky guys who made him insecure and jealous are actually disabled or hawaiian Loled at this
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 14:26
|
|
|
BONE DOG posted:What i don't understand about shallow hal is why the portly jack black was cast in what was clearly an early 2000's Ryan Reynolds vehicle A lot of the jokes only work because jack black is himself portly
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 14:42
|
|
|
Yeah if it was Reynolds it's be in the vein of that film where Josh Holness has to not bang anyone for 40 days. "Look at this dude-slut shagging all these hot broads while his girl bff is RIGHT THERE under his nose and would be his perfect match! But she's MOVIE UGLY." Queue a Zoltar cursing him (or is it a blessing?) to see inner beauty. Now his bff is MOVIE GORGEOUS and his ex supermodel girlfriend now looks like something from GWAR and is hunting him down to kill him. In the end everyone learns a lesson and the curse is lifted. Reel Big Fish plays over the end credits.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 15:33
|
|
|
I'm pretty sure gwyneth paltrow has a general disdain for fat people
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 15:51
|
|
|
A.I. Borgland Corp posted:How does he know these people have inner beauty? Like, his brain has never been these people, but somehow knows which ones are nice or not and makes on the fly decisions to make them either attractive or not. See that poo poo is dumb. Chunky chicks are hot. All those chicks in the movie had stupid faces, bad posture, Supercuts hairdos, and frumpy ugly clothes. Dude was just a creep with chicks with low self esteem, your not some kind of hero if you jam you’re hog into some doughy fuckmeat, reckon. 
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 15:51
|
|
|
ClamdestineBoyster posted:See that poo poo is dumb. Chunky chicks are hot. All those chicks in the movie had stupid faces, bad posture, Supercuts hairdos, and frumpy ugly clothes. Dude was just a creep with chicks with low self esteem, your not some kind of hero if you jam you’re hog into some doughy fuckmeat, reckon. Dude her character was far from chunky
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 15:54
|
|
|
BONE DOG posted:Dude her character was far from chunky  yeah it’s more like a 60 year old man.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 15:56
|
|
|
my two favorite scenes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3BQd2K3maI&t=38s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cmj0ug5SfrI&t=23s
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 15:58
|
|
|
Honestly good post OP. Remembered liking this film as a kid when I saw it in theatres for the reasons that you mentioned. I'm pretty sure if I were to rewatch this early 2000s comedy movie right now, I might find out that it didn't age the best, but I can still appreciate what it was going for.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 19:35
|
|
|
Kazak posted:P good review op, can't say I had strong feelings on the film but you've definitely cast it in a better light than it currently receives yeah, v nice OP. i enjoyed the stream of consciousness nature of the review (i’m sincere)
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 20:30
|
|
|
Much better HAL.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 21:02
|
|
|
The only thing I remember from that movie is Tony Robbins is in it and someone (I think Jack Black) says he has banana hands. I always thought the weirdest thing about him were his huge teeth and wondered if he told them, "It's okay to make fun of my hands but leave my teeth out of it." Did you see Stuck on You? I did not.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 21:05
|
|
|
Remember the scene where her fat butt broke the chair??? 
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 21:10
|
|
|
hevnz 2 murgatroyd posted:Remember the scene where her fat butt broke the chair??? i remember all twelve of them!!!
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 21:53
|
|
|
after all of the chairs collapsed in the World Trade Center on the tragic day of September 11, 2001, our best engineers were put to the task and fat people can now sit wherever they like
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 21:57
|
|
|
yeah I eat rear end posted:I don't like Jack Black specifically because of that movie. His character is incredibly annoying. nah it's cool when he darts his eyes back and forth quickly and goes "cuckoo! cuckoo!" and DEF not annoying
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 22:03
|
|
|
Mermaid Autopsy posted:after all of the chairs collapsed in the World Trade Center on the tragic day of September 11, 2001, our best engineers were put to the task and fat people can now sit wherever they like it's good to take pride in your work, even if your work is building the chairs for mcdonalds
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 22:04
|
|
|
vyst posted:Shallow Hal is HAES Propaganda
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 22:11
|
|
|
a good if controversial ending would have been: jack black crashes her party to say "ive been a very shallow hal and i'm sorry, i love you even though you are obese!" she is so shocked and surprised by his sudden unexpected appearance that she suffers a heart attack, clutching her chest and shrieking in pain. one last chair breaks beneath her (quick cut to Jack's reaction as it suddenly clicks in his mind why all those chairs kept breaking) and as the tragic piano music swells, rosemary dies right there atop chairbits and splintered wood and shredded upholstery. costanza walks up to jack, places a comforting paw on his shoulder, and says "she may have been beautiful on the inside, but she was morbidly obese and severely unhealthy on the outside. and now she has paid the price for her sloth and gluttony" fin.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 22:19
|
|
|
I think they played a CAKE song during the end credits Comfort Eagle? good track
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 22:24
|
|
|
I wonder where I Feel Pretty fits into OP's analysis
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 22:53
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 02:54 |
|
|
Perry Mason Jar posted:The actual really stupid poo poo is the idea that all ugly/unconventional people are beautiful on the inside and all beautiful people are ugly on the inside. If you've spent any time in this thread: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3835075 you'll know that that is certainly not true for the morbidly obese. Many of them maintain their self-esteem with a combination of entitlement and cognitive dissonance, crying bloody murder whenever someone suggests they so much as pay lip service to the idea of healthy living. If you looked at one of them with Shallow Hal powers, you'd probably see something between "goatse for a face" and "the alien from that one episode of Star Trek that drives you insane if you look at it".
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2018 23:16
|
|
