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net cafe scandal
Mar 18, 2011

I know this one is a little far out there folks, but hear me out.

One. Police are men and women who have given their lives to protect and serve.

Two. Let's face it... being a cop is dangerous. Many gang members and criminals don't bat an eye at killing cops with guns and knives.

Three. It is an immense tragedy when a police officer dies. There is often a newspaper special about it.

These three facts point towards one undeniable conclusion: when a policeman dies, there needs to be a way to bring them back. In the game Deus Ex: Human Revolution, Adam Jensen is a cop who gets brutalized by a powerful criminal...he's as good as dead when the brute is through with him. But thanks to cyborg implants and advanced technology, he goes from this:



to this:



Pretty amazing stuff. And when you've seen how advanced robotic prosthetics have become these days, it strikes me as ridiculous that cops are dying even now. Well, that about sums it up, I'd love to know what sort of ideas you guys have for keeping our boys in blue alive and well.

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TheObserver
Nov 7, 2012
I think you need to get the stars out of your eyes, for one thing. Also, Adam Jensen is a security guard for a corporation, he's only badly wounded, and the reason for his modifications is both a plot point and because his boss is paying for it. Oh, and it's the future, so all that science-fiction wank is fair game.

Think about it for a moment: if there was a way to "revive" anyone and place them in any sort of mechanical body, don't you think you would already be hearing about it? The only thing that comes anywhere close to what you're suggesting is stitching together various parts of dead officers into some kind of Frankenstein's Monster type of situation, and I sort of doubt you would get anyone to sign off on that.

TheObserver fucked around with this message at 10:32 on May 12, 2014

The Shep
Jan 10, 2007


If found, please return this poster to GIP. His mothers are very worried and miss him very much.
I think it's more likely that we'll see brain dumps straight to a hard drive to preserve knowledge/information than it is to see cyborg cops/soldiers/anything.

Victor Vermis
Dec 21, 2004


WOKE UP IN THE DESERT AGAIN

Cmdr. Shepard posted:

I think it's more likely that we'll see brain dumps straight to a hard drive to preserve knowledge/information than it is to see cyborg cops/soldiers/anything.

And thus mankind stemmed the tide of racial profiling flooding out into the fathomless depths of time.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

c-spam cannot afford



They're already planning this in Detroit in their robotcop program.

Branis
Apr 14, 2006

by VG
I wanna be a cyborg like Adam Jensen though

vains
May 26, 2004

A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners
Why would we want to revive dead cops? They're up in heaven with all their cop buddies beating minorities and planting evidence all day long.

Grem
Mar 29, 2004

It's how her species communicates

I'd like to hear more about your opinions on race relations, MassivelyBuckNegro.

vains
May 26, 2004

A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

Grem posted:

I'd like to hear more about your opinions on race relations, MassivelyBuckNegro.

I find the idea the term engenders abhorrent.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

Why would we want to revive dead cops?

so we can kill them again?

goatsestretchgoals
Jun 4, 2011

Great, another way for cops to kill innocent civilians.

"Sorry sarge, I thought I tapped the melee button, but I guess I must have held it down."

"It's okay son, just sprinkle some crack on him."

Snowdens Secret
Dec 29, 2008
Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.

Branis posted:

I wanna be a cyborg like Adam Jensen though

Sorry Branis we regret we were out of stock on the Jensen model at the time of your unfortunate demise and we could only get one type in within the required post-death interval. Please enjoy your new corporeal form

elite_garbage_man
Apr 3, 2010
I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

Snowdens Secret
Dec 29, 2008
Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.
Cybranis undergoes careful training to regain critical motor skills

net cafe scandal
Mar 18, 2011

Appreciate the input, guys. I had the idea of a cop with regenerating flesh at school yesterday, so even if a crook beat his face with chains and broken bottles, his flesh and bone would reform. Strictly speaking, this technology doesn't exist yet, but could it be possible with some sort of nanobot infusion?

Snowdens Secret
Dec 29, 2008
Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.
Cops have had the capability for flesh generation for ages. Take Park Ranger Slagcheek, he readily generates flesh, not with an infusion of nanobots but merely with consumer-grade powdered donuts. What you really need to look for is the tech to enable shifting that generated flesh to the wounded areas from his voluminous hips and thighs.

Baloogan
Dec 5, 2004
Fun Shoe

Snowdens Secret posted:

Cybranis undergoes careful training to regain critical motor skills



whoah no fatties

ded
Oct 27, 2005

Kooler than Jesus
NO ZOMBIE COPS IN MY BACK YARD!

Branis
Apr 14, 2006

by VG
robots arent zombies dummy

ded
Oct 27, 2005

Kooler than Jesus

Branis posted:

robots arent zombies dummy

Artificial life = ZOMBIE

Snowdens Secret
Dec 29, 2008
Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.
Aw, quit being such a cryborg

Huttan
May 15, 2013

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

Why would we want to revive dead cops?
They're dead, so no pensions. And they'll work overtime without needing to fill out a timecard. That's the only way we're going to meet budget around here.

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MancXVI
Feb 14, 2002

i'll make the wiki if somebody posts the kickstarter

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