- Basic Chunnel
- Sep 21, 2010
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Jesus! Jesus Christ! Say his name! Jesus! Jesus! Come down now!
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Wrestlemania XXXI, Part 1
quote:- Cole, JBL and Lawler recap what we’ve seen so far and run down the remaining card once again as the Preshow ends and the circus rolls on. “We’re glad you could join us for Wrestlemania in what just might be the last safe place on this Earth!”
A jaunty tune begins to play as our host for the evening makes his entrance to the grand stage!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EL6O1nAl5sE
The crowd goes as wild as this crowd gets as Christopher Walken wanders onstage, decked out in a slate blue suit and black turtleneck, hands in pockets and staring intently at the ground. After a minute or so of carefully shoeing around the red granite stage as his music plays, he suddenly looks up and at the thousands upon thousands of screaming fans trapped in this subterannean dome and the music cuts out.
“Wow! Wow!” he gapes in open wonder, laughing to himself. “I have to say… when I signed on for this, I… I knew it was special, I mean I was told by-“ Walken points briefly upwards, “but wow!” The crowd breaks out in a chant of WALK-EN WALK-EN and he takes the opportunity to perform a loose-limbed jig, not in any particular rhythm with the chants. He then motions for the crowd to calm down.
“Now it’s great to be here... I’ve lived a long life of performative violence, I guess you could say, but I’ve always held a certain respect for the sort of… thing that you’re about to witness tonight. It’s hot blooded, is what I call it. It’s really hot blooded. And what other place to see hot blood than in New Jersey!” The crowd roars again and he laughs. “And it was all made possible… by this man!” Walken points across the venue to a high corner, almost flush against the ceiling – there, carved from the sheer rock, is an alcove containing a terrible iron throne, rising from the floor as though grown from it. The man sitting upon it is none other than Vince McMahon’s Raging Id! As the spotlights fall upon him, it becomes apparent that he is bare-chested and strapped to his seat with iron manacles and bands, though he does not appear to be in distress. On the contrary, he is wild-eyed and laughing maniacally. “Thanks Vince!” Walken says as he waves from clear across the arena.
“But okay, let’s get down to business, yes? Yes?? I am here to be your guide, the Virgil to your Dante, and boy oh boy do I have some rings of HECK to show you tonight. For our first match, we have a man named Big E, and another man named Rusev, and they’re fighting over a United States-themed belt! I’m just gonna get off stage here but let’s see what this whole thing is about!!” He turns and walks into the back. What a way to start off the show! B+
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- We see on the omnitron an endless stretch of black-blue water, roiling slowly beneath a rust red sky. Superimposed, almost translucent upon this image, we see a promo package. In slow motion we see Rusev hoisting his title in the air after winning it from Sheamus last November, while Lana’s voiceover booms out from the PA. “It is not surprising, no? That the Bulgarian Brute would seize the United States’ championship. Many have sought to reclaim it.” A long montage of wrestlers tapping to the Accolade is shown – “All have fallen. For the truth is that we have stepped into a void of strength. Those who came before did not deserve this prize. Those who flatter themselves as champions to come... are fools. What would they know of strength? Of power? This land is a land of children, but its prize is held by a man of iron.”
The image then shifts to show Big E, also in slow motion, clapping his hands above his head, powder billowing from them as he does so. Xavier Woods’ voiceover fills the arena. “Man, some things just can’t be denied.” Footage of Big E lifting distressing amounts of weight, hitting splashes, spearing opponents through the ropes. “When my man Big E set his sights on the United States title, it was just a matter of time til we got here. It’s gonna take a great man to bring this championship back into the light... and there are none greater.” Big E is shown bending an iron bar and bellowing.
The image shifts again to highlights from matches Rusev and Big E have fought against one another, the speed of the footage increasing until it becomes a blur – until the blur fades to show a stopwatch, its arms spinning dizzily, as they begin to slow a clicking sound begins and slows with the arms, until finally they settle – long arm on the 0, small arm on the demarcation “15”. Rusev vs. Big E for the United States Championship in a 15 minute iron man match is next!.
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“AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WRESTLEMAAAAAANIAAAAAAAAAAA NOW DON’T YOU DARE BE SOUR! CLLLLLLLAP FOR YOUR SOON TO BE US CHAMP AND FEEEEEEEEEEEEEL THE POWWWWWAAAAAAH!!!” Big E and the New Day emerge onto the stage, which lights up in time with their clapping like some Vegas marquis. Despite the positive vibes, Big E is psyching himself up came down to the ring, looking ready to fight a war.
And a war he was going to get, as Rusev appeared to the strains of the Russian National Anthem, standing on a moving tank and waving the Russian flag with gusto! Lana sits in the tank’s hatch, her powersuit augmented with a bandolier, gripping two Kalishnokovs. The tank stops in the middle of the stage and Rusev heaves the flag aside before unclasping the United States title around his belt and hoisting it into the air as Lana fires her automatic rifles, cackling, and red fireworks erupt from the stage periphery. Rusev drops down from the tank and makes his way to the ring.
The match starts with the two competitors locking up in a mighty test of strength, with Big E initially coming out on top, until Rusev kicked him hard in the gut. The two of them started brawling back and forth, trading brutal punch for brutal punch, and only ending when Big E whips Rusev into a corner. He then attempts to spear Rusev, but Rusev moves forward and leaps clean over him as the power lifter crashes into the turnbuckle.
Rusev takes advantage of this by shoving Big E down and stomping on his prone form repeatedly. He sets Big E up for the Accolade, with Lana (now at ringside) shouting “RUSEV!!! CRUUUUUUUUSH!” but the rest of the New Day are just as adamant, shouting and pounding the canvas from across the ring. Big E comes to his senses just in time, rolling over and grabbing Rusev’s ankle to trip him. While Rusev is stunned, Big E quickly takes advantage, and hits the Big Ending in the center of the ring! 1…2…3!!!! At 5:38, RUSEV HAS BEEN PINNED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS WWE CAREER! (1-0 Big E)
Both men lay in the ring taking time to recuperate. Rusev is FURIOUS, and shouts something at Lana in Bulgarian. I heard that sounds like stool? Lana reaches under the ring and tosses Rusev a chair, and before John Cone can stop him, Rusev brings the chair down on Big E, beating him down repeatedly and brutally. Then, he tosses the chair to the side. Cone has no choice but to disqualify Rusev at 6:17. (2-0 Big E)
Rusev doesn’t let up on the attack, though, and stomps Big E hard in the back, before setting him up for the Accolade! Big E screams in pain, but refuses to tap. In agony, he struggles against Rusev, trying to get up… and he does! Rusev can’t believe it, as Big E falls backwards, to counter the Accolade into a pinfall! 1…2…No! Rusev manages to get his shoulder up! He’s livid now, and a hard kick to the gut knocks Big E down again! Rusev goes on the attack, and hits Big E with a Bulplex! Not satisfied with that, he grabs Big E again, and hits him with another Bulplex! 1…2…3! At 10:08, Rusev scores his first fall of the night! (2-1 Big E)
Not slowing his momentum down at all, Rusev flips Big E over, and hits him hard with a stomp! Without giving his opponent a second to breathe, Rusev locks in the Accolade again! After all the abuse he’s taken in the match, Big E can’t break free of the Accolade again, and taps out, at 12:48 (2-2)
Rusev celebrates having made Big E tap, roaring triumphantly, and lifts his foot to stomp Big E again, but with an unexpected burst of energy, Big E rolls out of the way. The two men just stand across the ring, staring at each other, before Rusev tries to go for another gut kick! Big E is ready for him, though, and catches his foot! He spins Rusev around a full 360 degrees, and, as Xavier is pounding that familiar beat onto the apron, lifts Rusev up for another Big Ending, onto the steel chair! 1…2…3! At 13:50, Big E has regained the lead! (3-2 Big E)
Rusev explodes at this point, shouting as loud as he can about how no American is going to beat him for the title! As Lana shouts for Rusev to crush, Rusev locks in the Accolade again, at 14:25 Shouting as loud as he can in Bulgarian for Big E to tap out, he cranks the Accolade to a degree I’ve never seen before! Big E’s body is bending to an inhuman degree! John Cone looks at Big E and lifts his arm… it drops. He lifts Big E’s arm a second time… it drops again. With three seconds left, John Cone lifts Big E’s arm a third time… and he holds it up! When Cone asks Big E if he taps, he wags his finger as the match ends, and BIG E HAS DEFEATED RUSEV 3-2 FOR THE US TITLE!
- Rusev releases the hold and kneels on the canvas, a vacant look on his face, as Lana screams incoherently. Kofi pulls Big E from the ring and Xavier retrieves the belt and hands it to a near-collapsing Big E as his team carries him up the ramp. C+
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After a break, the lights go out once again in the arena, and the omnitron projects a scene from the back. Kurt Angle, back in street gear with a wrapped arm in a sling, is shuffling into his office, looking exhausted. He turns and the camera turns with him – Christopher Walken is in the office, nestled against the wall between a bookcase and a lamp! The celebrated screen actor steps out from the furniture arrangement decked in a white suit over a Slayer tour shirt, beneath his trim white pompadour and sunken eyes.
Angle is taken aback “Mr. Walken” Walken stops him. “Christopher, please.” Angle squints and continues, “Christopher, I’m glad you’re finally here. We had people worried you wouldn’t make it.”
Walken laughs a strange laugh, unblinking. “Commissioner Angle, I would not miss this Wrestlemania, not for the world. Believe me.” Angle still seems confused, and clears his throat. “So, uh… who let you in here?” Walken laughs again. “Commissioner, I was invited.”
Before Angle can protest, Walken places a flat hand on his chest. “This is a big night, Mr. Commissioner. Things of great import are about to happen. It’s very exciting… very exciting. I know my role, as they say. So don’t you worry, your master of ceremonies is here. And I am. A master of ceremonies, I mean. Sacrificial ceremonies, mourning ceremonies, celebratory ceremonies. The gamut, you know. I haven’t decided what this one is just yet. I guess we’ll find out.” Walken gently pats Angle on the shoulder once, then hesitates, then does it again.
“Well I’ve got a job to do, so I’ll let you get back to your rest. Congratulations on the match, by the way. I was in here, but, I heard through the walls.” Walken shrugs and walks off camera while Angle stands looking confused.
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Back in the dome, the heavy beats of Mark Henry’s theme play as he makes his way onstage, lit from below so as to accentuate his imposing figure, including the red strap across his waist. We see that the way to the ramp is lined with 21 barbells, one for each successful title defense, each holding extreme weights – 150 lbs on either side, at least. Henry steels himself, then lifts the first barbell, tossing it over his shoulder as he does so! Henry plows through the weights, each clanging audibly even from a great distance, until he has made it to the ramp. He thumps his chest ferociously and walks down to the ring and waits for his as-yet-unannounced opponent.
An unfamiliar theme starts playing as lights flash and whirl. As the beat drops, a man appears onstage – he looks out at the bellowing crowd through a pair of aviators, a cool and calm expression on his face, before he moves forward, leaping over the discarded weights effortlessly. As he clears the final hurdle he turns his back to the ring, so that the SZ, encircled in steel grey on black leather, is visible. He turns back around and moves intently toward the ring, sliding in while keeping an eye on the confident-looking champ. He raises a mic to his face.
“Finally, the WWE Universe gets its opportunity to see, live and in action, the one, the only... Sami Zayn!” The crowd moans its approval. “Maybe you know me, maybe you don’t know me. I’ve performed under many names all around the world, but there’s been one constant throughout my career, and it’s that I fight-“he raises a finger and turns it, slowly, around the ring, pointing to the crowd “for the enjoyment of my people. And I am goddamned electrifying when I do.” Zayn pauses for a beat. “Well I guess that’s two constants.”
“The point is, Sami Zayn is here, making his befitting debut on the grandest stage in all of sports entertainment. And I’m gonna win THAT title-“ he points at the belt around Henry’s waist, “Even if it’s the last thing that I do on this Earth. So Mark... You’ve been on quite a roll these past few months, but it ends tonight. Show me what you got.” Zayn removes his glasses and jacket and tosses them out of the ring. Henry nods, his eyes fixed on Zayn, as he removes his belt and hands it to the official. The official signals for the bell.
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The match began with Sami Zayn attempting to take the champ off his feet with a rush of hard strikes, but Henry didn't budge an inch, and took Zayn to the mat with a lariat. After he had the challenger on the mat, Henry demolished him with heavy power offense, powerslamming him against the turnbuckle, crushing him into the mat with a running splash, and squeezing the life out of him with a bearhug before attempting to put him down for good with the World's Strongest Slam. However, Zayn wasn't down yet, and hooked his leg on the top rope to halt Henry's momentum before reversing the World's Strongest Slam into a Flatliner!
Zayn tried to transition into a Koji Clutch and work down the giant's cardio, but Henry got the ropes and dragged himself out of the ring, clearly angered by Zayn's resistance. The crowd clearly expected Zayn to go for a big plancha to the outside, but instead he slipped out cattycorner to Henry, got a big running start, LEAPT THROUGH THE ROPES, AND TOOK HENRY TO THE MAT WITH A FLYING TORNADO DDT! As the crowd chanted SA-MI, SA-MI, SA-MI, Zayn struggled to lift the staggered Henry back into the ring, but he just barely managed. As Henry laid on the mat, Zayn looked to the top rope, scaled the turnbuckle, and hit Henry with a picture perfect 450 splash!
1...2...2.9, Henry just barely kicked out! Zayn, clearly frustrated, got to his feet and began taunting Henry to get back up. Henry slowly but surely got back to his feet, and Sami barreled towards him for the “People’s Boot”, as Cole calls it, but got put right back down with a devastating one-arm pickup slam from the World's Strongest Man! Henry, still feeling the effects of Sami's high-energy offense, hit the ropes and went for a running splash, coming down onto Zayn with all his 400 pounds!
1, SAMI KICKED OUT! The crowd went wild as Zayn scrambled back to his feet, loopy but undeniably fired up, and laid into Henry with strike after strike after strike, pushing him back into the corner with a series of shin kicks to the abdomen, ringing his bell with a step-up enzuigiri, running to the opposite corner, leaping onto the opposite turnbuckle to a hearty OLE from the fans in attendance, running right back towards Henry, AND FINALLY CONNECTING WITH THE PEOPLE’S BOOT! Zayn landed a run-up moonsault for good measure, and hooked Henry's ham-hock leg for the pin.
1...2...3! SAMI ZAYN IS YOUR NEW WWE NETWORK CHAMPION! Sami slings the belt over his shoulder and points upward as the crowd roars, Henry rolls out of the ring, and the announcer’s cage heralds the arrival of a hungry new force in the WWE. “If we’re all gonna die tonight, at least somebody’s got the title!” King says. C
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We return to the back, in a deserted hallway. Suddenly, Joey Styles appears, moving briskly and glancing behind him as he goes. He clutches a leatherbound book to his chest.
The camera follows him as he makes his way to a junction, where Ryvaughan happen to be occupying after their successful match, engaged in an intense arm wrestling match that looks to have been in stalemate for quite some time.. Styles stops and holds the book in his hands, and it seems to vibrate as he looks from the book to the team and back to the book. The musclemen take notice. “Whatcha got there Joey?” asks Ryback, maintaining his grip. “YEAH WHAT YOU GOT STYLES” Vaughan chimes in. Styles responds. “I’m afraid you’ve been chosen, boys. Ryback, Sam, I’m on a mission to save this company. But it appears that I can only do it with your help.”
Vaughan cocks an eyebrow and looks at Ryback over their connected arms. “Finish this later?” Ryback nods. They count to three together then let go, exhaling. Ryback turns to Styles. “Let’s go.”
Styles Holds the book up again and it seems to pull him down another hallway. Ryvaughan follows him as we return to the show. B-
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- A large swath of the WWE midcard has amassed in the ring for the second annual Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal! It started out chaotic, as these things tend to, but eventually the throng is whittled down to a final 8 of The Big Show, Don English, Roman Reigns, Sheamus, Stardust, Rey Mysterio, Jack Swagger, and Ash Dixon. Show had cleared the ring early in the match, and Ash slipped under the bottom rope during that time, hiding at ringside and waiting for the time to strike. Don English tried to pay off Big Show with blood money to get him on his side, but got tossed over the top for his trouble. Rey Mysterio had a nice high flying spotlight, taking out Swagger with a rana before getting Brogued over the ropes to the floor.
Ash took this opportunity to strike, grabbing Sheamus' leg and trying to pull him to the floor, but Stardust got Sheamus from the other side, sending him and Dixon to the mat. Dixon tried to argue to the refs that he wasn’t eliminated, but they ruled that he was, putting Stardust's elimination total for the match just above Show by 2. This left just Stardust, Show, and Reigns to spar it out, and Stardust was more than happy to let Show and Reigns spar. They traded jabs and Reigns even got a Superman Punch in, but eventually he went for the Spear and got gorilla pressed to the outside. Stardust tried to take advantage, and almost got Show to the outside, but he eventually hit the floor, and the refs declared Big Show the winner. Show hoists the trophy over his head in celebration to end the segment. B-
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- The lights go down again and we’re treated to a hype package for Christian vs. Kevin Owens. It starts with a compilation of Christian’s greatest hits, both tagging with Edge and as a solo act – hitting spots, winning titles. “A long time ago, I decided that I wasn't going to be one of those superstars who did the job until a doctor told them they had to stop. Nobody is going to tell me to stop because I know who I am, I know what reality is, and I can face it.”
We then see footage of Owens brutalizing opponents with his ring apron powerbomb. "I am the future of this business, old man. And whatever you were before... Now you're nothing."
We see Kevin Owens viciously attack Christian on the Peep Show and pop-up powerbombing him into an unfolded chair. Then, a short highlight reel of their No Way Out match, Christian winning by count out in the last moment and getting stretchered out.
“Kevin Owens, for all he gave, couldn’t beat me. I said I was going to end my career at Wrestlemania, and I fully intend to. Owens couldn’t stop me from getting there and he’s not gonna stop me from going out victorious.”
“I may have been prevented from closing the book on you this once, Christian, but we get one more dance and then, then, it’s gonna happen in front of the entire goddamn world. And I’ll make sure that nothings stands in my way.” The segment ends with Owens crushing Edge’s glasses at the Hall of Fame on the Tron as Christian holds Edge back and looks intently up. Kevin Owens vs. Christian is next! A
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Kevin Owens comes out first, and it’s a no-frills affair, stomping down the barren rock ramp with a look on his face that tells you that it would be a bad idea to bother him with anything beyond what he’s about to do. A pleased-as-peaches Paul Heyman strides just behind. When he gets in the ring, Owens grabs the hard cam rope and screams, the crowd returning the sound amplified, a crimson glow shining upon them. He faces away from the stage, stretching and warming up.
Christian’s music hits and the crowd erupts, as he and his best friend Edge walk out to the stage. Christian’s shoulders are draped with a dazzling cape of navy blue and silver, matching his tights, while Edge is sharply dressed in a suit. They look out upon the crowd, Christian shading his eyes as he’s done so many times before, and never will again, in this context at least. They walk down to the ring, slapping the sinewy outstretched hands of the crowd at the barricade, and before he makes his last step from the stairs to the ring, Christian stops for a moment, then rears himself up on the turnbuckle, looking out at the crowd, before dropping the cape. He drops into the ring and tests the ropes. Owens has spent this entire time with his back turned on the far side of the ring.
The ref jostles Owens into facing his opponent, and they stare down as the bell is rung and the sounds of the crowd are all we hear. When they finally tie up, it’s quick and intense. Owens brings his trademark ferocity to the exchange, wrenching in holds and wasting no time trying to capitalize, but Christian matches him for skill, frustrating the brute with reversals and tricks of his own. As Christian starts to go from reversing to making Owens reverse, the heel snarls and hits the veteran with a nasty back elbow that sends him to the mat. But Christian is spry and comes back up, hitting a forearm to the jaw, which Owens shakes off and returns.
Christian unloads with another forearm, but rather than getting into the expected strong style exchange, Christian ducks Owens’ shot and flits behind him, diving for a shoulder chop block that sends Owens tumbling down. Christian maneuvers to one corner as Owens rolls to the other, a look of anger and frustration on his face.
They move to lock up again but both hold off, feeling the other out. Owens acts quickly, diving to grab Christian’s leg for a takedown, and Christian is caught off balance, falling to the ground as Owens transitions to an ankle lock! Christian struggles for a few moments but seems to collect himself, pushing himself straight off the ground and twisting in a complicated-but-fluid manner that cleanly reverses his predicament, Owens falling straight forward to find himself in a kneebar. Owens thrashes and howls but claws himself to the ropes for a break.
As both men rise Owens lashes out with a wild right hand that Christian didn’t see coming and it lands with force, knocking the veteran backward as Owens gets up, clutching his knee and gritting his teeth. He brings the seated, dazed Christian up and lifts him up for a suplex… and drops him straight backwards into the turnbuckle in a brutal landing. Christian lands in a heap in the corner as Edge slams his fist on the mat on the other side of the ring.
Owens shoves Christian onto the first turnbuckle and begins roughly washing his face with a boot, leaping up with the ropes as leverage and coming down again and again. Edge is agitated, pacing back and forth outside – and Paul Heyman comes up behind him, shoving him lightly. Edge whirls around and Heyman raises his hands and backs away, a heated Edge encroaching on him. In the ring, Owens grabs a fistful of the ref’s shirt and points him to ringside as Heyman makes as through he’s being menaced by the retired superstar. The ref marches over to the other side to berate Edge and as he does so, Owens quickly gets to work removing the turnbuckle pads, tossing them outside and enraging Edge further as he futilely tries to redirect the ref’s attention.
After removing the second turnbuckle pad, however, Owens has been ignoring Christian too long, and from nowhere he hits a throat thrust on his open opponent, then grabs the bottom ropes and kicks straight out, hitting Owens in the chest and staggering him across the ring. Christian hauls himself up with fire and barrels forward, jumping for a spectacular leaping forearm that clocks Owens on the side of the head but doesn’t quite bring him down.
Christian grabs Owens by the nape of the neck and throws him into the corner opposite the exposed steel, then runs forward again to hit another forearm that takes Owens down to his knees. Christian kicks him away from the corner and lifts himself to seated position on the turnbuckle, motioning with both hands at Owens to bring it on. Owens girds himself and charges, but Christian is quicker – in one swift motion, he drops to the side and lands on the apron, leaving Owens to smash into the turnbuckle. Christian then ducks under the first rope and levers himself, bringing both legs swinging up to hit Owens straight in the face!
Owens is brought flailing to one knee and he looks completely out of it as the crowd gets fired up for Christian and he gets back in the ring, advancing toward Owens… But Owens bursts forward, connecting with a cracking headbutt that gets a gasp from the crowd. Owens gets up, seemingly running on nerves, then vaults forward and smashes Christian into the corner before immediately pulling back with all his strength and a primordial bellow, sending Christian across the ring with every ounce of strength and every inch of momentum that physics affords him, falling forward on the mat as Christian is practically launched through the air and lands with a sickening smack against the exposed turnbuckles. Christian crumples to the ground and slides, like a ragdoll, onto the floor outside the ring. Owens staggers back to his feet, wobbly, and reaches up to touch his face, realizing that his mouth is bleeding as the ref starts the count.
The ref counts to 5 as Owens stands in the ring, a look of conflict on his face. He could just let this happen and win the match… but his eyes become steely cold again, and he makes for the outside, pulling a limp Christian into the ring and following him to get a proper pin.
1!
2!
At the last microsecond, Christian’s arm jerks up. Both Edge and Heyman stand stunned outside the ring, but Edge is focused now, pacing and not yelling too emphatically, his eyes trained on the competitors. Owens pounds the mat with his fists and looks from where he’s seated to the gasping Christian. He rises and brings Christian up too, holding him by the chin, says something to him, and then slaps him across the face. Christian drops to one knee, and Owens stands above him for a second before rearing up and unleashing an elbow across Christian’s face, and then another.
Owens brings him up again, and throws the man across the ropes, prepping for a pop-up powerbomb to end it. But as Christian pops he flies over Owens’ head and lands on his feet, catching the ropes with his hands. Unfortunately for him, Owens had this scouted, and with barely a look behind him he unleashes a superkick that lands at the base of Christian’s skull. Christian stumbles forward and over the rope, just barely hanging on.
Owens trudges over and grabs his opponent to pull him into standing position on the apron. But Christian, nearly out of it, rises with another forearm to Owens’ face! He breathes heavily as he grabs Owens’ head with his left hand and unleashes elbows with his right until Owens is dazed. Then he turns Owens around, trapping his arms from between the first and second rope, and pulls out his ace card – Christian jerks Owens outward, leaning precariously out from the ring with Owens’ lower back resting on the second rope for a moment. Then in one graceful movement, Christian drops to the floor, twisting – delivering a plummeting Unprettier variant that connects Owens’ forehead with the apron edge. The crowd pop is deafening and both managers freak the gently caress out as their clients fall to the floor.
By the ref’s 7 count, Christian has risen and manages to roll Owens back in. Owens lies prone and Christian just sits next to him for a stretch of time, during which some in the audience count visual pinfalls, but Christian, despite clearly being on his last legs, seems in turmoil. He looks at Owens, then out at Edge, who seems to almost shake his head before looking into the eyes of his friend and pausing. Edge closes his eyes and nods.
Christian looks to the ceiling of the dome, and slaps his chest twice, grimacing. Then he rises to his feet over the stirring Owens. “Get up! Come on!” Christian yells as his nemesis. “Come on! Come on!” The ref begins yelling the KO count but Christian stops him curtly. Eventually Owens comes back to reality and rises to seating position, looking with disgust (or something else?) at Christian waiting for him. He rises to his feet on his own and faces Christian, who gets in his face and says three words: “I’m not done.” Owens stares at Christian for a moment, his eyes distant, and he replies: “Neither am I.” With that, Owens shoves Christian back into the ropes and hits a pop-up powerbomb, transitioning straight into a cover!
1!
2!
It’s hard to tell if Christian kicked out or Owens let go. Owens steps back. Christian takes a breather then strains to his feet and they face off again. Again, Owens pushes, again a pop-up powerbomb, another cover.
1!
2!
This time it’s definitely Christian kicking out, dry heaving on the mat and propping himself up on his elbows. For a second, Owens’ face breaks into a smirk, but he steps back. Christian staggers to face him. Shove, pop-up powerbomb.
1!
2!
At the last moment, Owens simply releases the legs and steps back. The ref is clearly annoyed but no one is paying attention to him. This time, Owens picks up Christian, now wobbly on his feet, but his eyes still hold a spark of focus that burrows into Owens’. Owens laughs, then shoves Christian again, who miraculously still runs the ropes without faceplanting but gets hit with another pop-up powerbomb. But instead of going for the pin transition, Owens reaches down and grabs Christian’s arms, deadilifting him from another power bomb. Another. Another.
Owens releases Christian when he notices that on the outside, Edge is running from the back and brandishing a white cloth. Owens sneers and shakes his head, dropping out of the ring to confront him. He takes the white flag and rips it into shreds, getting in Edge’s face. “I’m ending this, no more.” Owens looks at him incredulously for a moment, “If you want to end it –“ Owens steps away and sweeps an arm toward the ring and the still-motionless Christian, “- go ahead, you can take the pin.”
Edge looks like he’s been slapped. He stands his ground for a moment, then backs away. “No. Go finish your job. But I won’t forget this. And you will live to regret it.” Edge turns away from the ring and Owens chuckles humorlessly to himself. He enters the ring again and pulls Christian to his feet again, then puts him in traditional powerbomb position. He lifts the limp Christian, turns around, and lobs him full-force against the exposed turnbuckles one more time. Then he places a boot on the chest of the fallen Christian. 1. 2. 3.
The crowd boos as Owens is declared the winner. But he doesn’t celebrate, nor show any verve of any kind – he simply walks out of the ring and away, ignoring the fans and Edge and even Paul Heyman, who seems pleased but a little confused. They walk to the back without further ado. B
After the match, Edge scrambles into the ring to check on his friend. Christian is barely conscious as he takes his old partner’s hand – we can’t hear what they’re saying but Edge looks shocked. Christian rises to his feet with assistance from Edge as the “Thank-You-Christian” chants start in from all corners of the stands of SLAMADU. Christian shields his eyes and turns to look, from all four directions around the ring, at the masses chanting his name. Then he he looks up, and a soft blue light envelops his face as he closes his eyes. Lightly, almost imperceptibly, he taps his chest twice, and all of a sudden an invisible wind seems to blow through the arena. Christian, it appears, is fading, the edges of him in the eye’s vision dissolving, Edge attempts to grab his friend, ever more frantically as he disappears, but the fingers slip through the fabric of his being, until finally only his blue-lit face there, and no longer there. Edge looks around frantically, then at his hands, and he falls to his knees, clutching his head, as the arena lights go dark again. B+
Basic Chunnel fucked around with this message at 08:33 on Sep 8, 2016
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Aug 9, 2016 12:48
