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The Midniter
Jul 9, 2001

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA

Make this OP it's easy and simple

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Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts

Tiggum posted:

Ignore anyone who tells you you need fancy stuff like "a sharp knife"

This. Always use a blunt knife so you have to use additional force and potentially lose control of the knife and slice open your finger. You won't be a real chef until you do this.

Submarine Sandpaper
May 27, 2007


To follow that, corn starch and super glue is a good adhesive.

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
lmao cooking is easy, just take stuff you want to eat and make it hot you dipshit this isnt rocket science

Kafka Esq.
Jan 1, 2005

"If you ever even think about calling me anything but 'The Crab' I will go so fucking crab on your ass you won't even see what crab'd your crab" -The Crab(TM)

Nooner posted:

lmao cooking is easy, just take stuff you want to eat and make it hot you dipshit this isnt rocket science

Sometimes you have to make it cold tho

SymmetryrtemmyS
Jul 13, 2013

I got super tired of seeing your avatar throwing those fuckin' glasses around in the astrology thread so I fixed it to a .jpg

Kafka Esq. posted:

Sometimes you have to make it cold tho

knowing this is what makes you a chef

Shjade
Sep 20, 2008
Learn to make some decent marinades for meat and some food-spice combinations. They aren't hard to add to a dish and make them delicious.

Here's the basics to making a marinade: http://www.cookinglight.com/cooking-101/techniques/how-to-marinate-meat Although you're going to want to look up some recipes instead of just throwing things together but here is what you'd want to look for in those recipes.

And here's a basic list of what spices to add to a food: http://extension.udel.edu/factsheet/herbs-spices-what-goes-with-what-food/

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer
You know how they say in sculpture you just take a block of marble and chip away everything that doesn't look like David/an elephant/whatever it is you're sculpting? Cooking is just like that. Hope this helps.

Guildenstern Mother
Mar 31, 2010

Why walk when you can ride?

Test Pattern posted:

In all seriousness, Good Eats is on YouTube and Netflix. He will walk you through super-basic techniques, and even do some fairly advanced techniques, recipes and concepts. First time you cook something, follow a recipe (his or someone else's) SLAVISHLY -- you don't know what you're doing yet, so you don't know how important some little step or ingredient could be. VERY VERY SOON you'll be able to just pick up and cook stuff, or riff off recipes you find online.

Alternatively to SLAVISHLY following the recipe, read about 5-6 recipes for the same thing. The things all of them have in common? SLAVISHLY DO THOSE, see what's different about them, and those things are prob safe to mess around with. Also read the comments, lots of people will rate a recipe highly and then you look at the comments and its some nonsense, like "I made this and it was fabulous but I didn't have chicken so I used strip steak and instead of white wine and lemons I used gorgonzola. 5/5 would make again"

theres a will theres moe
Jan 10, 2007


Hair Elf
There are only two uses for the "high" burner setting on your range - boiling water, and searing stuff in a non-nonstick pan.

Stick to medium, even if the recipe says otherwise. Hth.

But Not Tonight
May 22, 2006

I could show you around the sights.

Number 1 Sexy Dad posted:

There are only two uses for the "high" burner setting on your range - boiling water, and searing stuff in a non-nonstick pan.

Stick to medium, even if the recipe says otherwise. Hth.

:agreed:

Also drying your cast iron after washing it is an acceptable answer.

Goon Danton
May 24, 2012

Don't forget to show my shitposts to the people. They're well worth seeing.

For starter recipes, it can help to go after something with a variety of strong flavors, like curries or jerk chicken. They usually have premade spice mixes you can buy to reduce the amount of up-front costs, and the strong flavors help to cover for you if you don't do something perfectly.

Other people have mentioned this, but recipes are literally the only time you should read the comments section on a webpage.

Another important process in your cooking career:
1) try a new ingredient or spice you haven't cooked with before.
2) become obsessed with new ingredient, start putting it in everything
3) calm down a little, figure out where it works and where it doesn't.
4) repeat with literally every ingredient.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



It's also helpful to make and remake dishes. I've made that black bean soup scores of times, and as a result I've learned how to really perfect that soup, but also how to make good soup in general. Similarly making chili a lot has taught me the best ways to brown a bunch of meat, and making baked macaroni and cheese over and over has given me a very good feel for using a roux. Cooking is extremely iterative, so repetition is key to getting comfortable in the kitchen.

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
FYI appears OP doesn't actually want to cook.

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Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Who cares.

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