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The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Help Im being kidnapped
 
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Qwerinty

by zen death robot
Just the phone number to the local dominos pizza chain

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 18:46
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Adbot
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# ? Apr 19, 2024 08:33
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alnilam

 Just the phone number to the local dominos pizza chain

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 18:47
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Senior Management



 dominoes

:jerry:
* # ? Sep 1, 2015 20:20
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DeepQantas

Ah, to be a Hero... Keeping such company...
 - Dominoes pizza!
- hi uh i got this weird message. Something about a...
- please hold *imitates elevator music* Dominoes Kidnappings. If you want to see your friend alive do exactly as we tell you!

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:16
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ClamdestineBoyster
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
"Hi you have reached the dominos help desk. To order a pizza, press 1. To have a menu faxed to your office, press 2. To pay ransom for a kidnapping victim with a credit or debit card, press 3.

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* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:41
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DOPE FIEND KILLA G

 does dominos accept EBT to pay for ransoms? hosed up if notnthink about how much of a disadvantage this puts kidnapee victims who are at or below the poverty level, really just furthers the disenfranchisement of those people. think im gonna stick with lil caesers here for my kidnapping & hostage situation needs

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:54
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playground tough
 corporations arent people! how can they get away with this???/

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:55
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DOPE FIEND KILLA G

 Baby it's not Stockholm; it's DiGiorno

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:58
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DeepQantas

Ah, to be a Hero... Keeping such company...
 - Im holding the earth hostage!
- Earth? but it's right here. I'm standing on it... I think...

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:59
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DeepQantas

Ah, to be a Hero... Keeping such company...

DOPE FIEND KILLA G posted:

Baby it's not Stockholm; it's DiGiorno
* # ? Sep 1, 2015 21:59
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mags

I am a congenital optimist.
ugh, this ransom note has extra cheese

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

(USER WAS PERMABANNED FOR THIS POST)
* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:01
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Bwee
 In the acclaimed young adult series "Animorphs," the Animorphs were captured outside of Area 51 and, when asked for his phone number, Marco gave the number for his local Domino's

Edit: Rachel, Pizza Hut

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:02
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DeepQantas

Ah, to be a Hero... Keeping such company...

CAT BRUSH posted:

ugh, this ransom note has extra cheese
- Careful. Could be poison
- Nah, ain't got anchovies on it

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:09
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tao of lmao

 Thank you for being abducted by domino's, please fill out this brief survey to help us nab you better.

Please rate the following statements on a scale of 1 (strongly agree) to 5 (strongly disagree).

  • I was expecting to be kidnapped
  • My kidnappers were gentle, with my safety in mind
  • I was able to contact the outside world while in captivity
  • I figured out where I was held, and I could relay that information to someone had the opportunity risen
  • I would recommend this service to my friends
* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:10
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Pinche Rudo

 Is the kidnapping going to keep me up all night with heart burn

Check out the podcast - https://rudospodcast.co

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:11
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DeepQantas

Ah, to be a Hero... Keeping such company...

Bwee posted:

Edit: Rachel, Pizza Hut
- yea I'd like to order a haw...
- I'm sorry but we had to close early today for fumigation. We should be reopening next week. Sorry.
- oh uhh... ok I guess I'll
- *BEEEEP!*

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:15
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Qwerinty

by zen death robot

tao of lmao posted:

Thank you for being abducted by domino's, please fill out this brief survey to help us nab you better.

Please rate the following statements on a scale of 1 (strongly agree) to 5 (strongly disagree).

  • I was expecting to be kidnapped
  • My kidnappers were gentle, with my safety in mind
  • I was able to contact the outside world while in captivity
  • I figured out where I was held, and I could relay that information to someone had the opportunity risen
  • I would recommend this service to my friends

lol

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* # ? Sep 1, 2015 22:27
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FreshCutFries

 the dominoes kidnap tracker shows that I've just been kidnapped by Skyler. help

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 23:08
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Qwerinty

by zen death robot
the reason they keep encouraging you to buy so many medium pizzas on one order? more elaborate ransom notes spelled with toppings

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* # ? Sep 1, 2015 23:15
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Bwee

Thingyman posted:

the dominoes kidnap tracker shows that I've just been kidnapped by Skyler. help

i looked to see if there was a dominos pizza tracker customizer where you could make one of these for kidnapping but there's not so i gave up

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 23:39
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cuntman.net

 the frozen pizza is as hard as a brick this is so they can put a note on it and throw it through peoples windows

* # ? Sep 1, 2015 23:39
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mags

I am a congenital optimist.
when i get kidnapped i use the island-themed tracker

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

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* # ? Sep 1, 2015 23:52
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mags

I am a congenital optimist.
tha police are on their way with yer captor's order mon

paul_soccer12 posted:

everyone in the idf must die

(USER WAS PERMABANNED FOR THIS POST)
* # ? Sep 1, 2015 23:53
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Al Borland

by XyloJW
Dominos gives me the shits so i can't help you.

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* # ? Sep 2, 2015 01:56
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City of Glompton

 I asked the kidnapper for extra red peppers and a plastic fork, and he was happy to oblige, he even included some extras "for next time". Unfortunately, I couldn't help but use those condiments to secure my freedom immediately. My feedback? This kidnapping would be better if delivery kidnappers only carried parmesan packets and those brown napkins.


thank you PSP for the beautiful spring sig

* # ? Sep 2, 2015 02:21
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les fleurs du mall

by LadyAmbien
Do the Dominos Online Ordering Experience Customer Feedback Survey or th girl dies

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* # ? Sep 2, 2015 11:21
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# ? Apr 19, 2024 08:33
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Ace of Baes
 Woody Harrelson: What the hell is wrong with this guy?!?! He dun killed the girl with a pizzah-pie! This one sick mama jamma?

Matthew Mcconaughey: No, you don't see, it's much deeper than that, these pepperonis, the way the anchovies are stood up around the bodies like idols, he's done this before.

Woody Harrelson: What in the sam hell are you talkin' about?!?!

Matthew Mcconaughey: (picking up the pizza and rotating it) Time...is a flat circle.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
* # ? Sep 2, 2015 12:18
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Help Im being kidnapped