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Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

rezatahs posted:

i got a call once and thought nothing of it but through a series of circumstances months later i found out the call came from inside the house

I mean if it's one of those old Victorians turned into a million lil slummy apartments then I'm not impressed

But you strike me as wealthy and sophisticated

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R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007

welcome to dead gay house
if you guys wanna make a few bucks please pm me on yahoo chat

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

R.L. Stine posted:

if you guys wanna make a few bucks please pm me on yahoo chat

lmfao

Cruising Altitude
Sep 15, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois
your creepy pasta is not as creepy as you ya dang cat killing psycho cat

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
who killed a cat :ohdear:

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

Gatekeeper posted:

who killed a cat :ohdear:

The cat came back. The very next day.

Cruising Altitude
Sep 15, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois

Gatekeeper posted:

who killed a cat :ohdear:

look im probably less scarier to the ones that like blood than you ya kno

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
It's okay guys. Cruising altitude thinks i'm the guy from Making a Murderer (available on Netflix enabled devices).

This is an honest mistake but that guy has a beard and kills cats whereas I have glasses and raise cats from the dead with my handy dandy portable pet cemetery.

Takane
Aug 24, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
Once I opened my fridge and there was no gabagool!!!! I nearly fainted in fright.

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.

JiveHonky posted:

It's okay guys. Cruising altitude thinks i'm the guy from Making a Murderer (available on Netflix enabled devices).

This is an honest mistake but that guy has a beard and kills cats whereas I have glasses and raise cats from the dead with my handy dandy portable pet cemetery.

lol he's accused me of being a murderer in multiple threads, it's awesome

I want to murder but I'm afraid

This recognition is good though because it's all I wanted ever really, and I needn't slice the life out of some disgusting whore to punish her for the filth between her legs and her contemptuous giggles

personable decorum
Sep 7, 2016

by FactsAreUseless

Gatekeeper posted:

lol he's accused me of being a murderer in multiple threads, it's awesome

I want to murder but I'm afraid

This recognition is good though because it's all I wanted ever really, and I needn't slice the life out of some disgusting whore to punish her for the filth between her legs and her contemptuous giggles

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rn84MivoUik

personable decorum
Sep 7, 2016

by FactsAreUseless
just saying when you smirk @ the death of courtney arthur maybe someone needs to gently caress u up know who u are and what u do eh

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
lmao you're kind of a gbs true scary story in a way

SatansChoice
Sep 14, 2016

by Smythe

Gatekeeper posted:

lmao you're kind of a gbs true scary story in a way

Lord Frankenstyle
Dec 3, 2005

Mmmm,
You smell like Lysol Wipes.

Friginator posted:

Once I was seeing how many marbles I could fit in my foreskin when I heard gunshots, and when I ran to the window there had been a drive-by shooting across the street, and the guy had been shot in the head and his blood was running down the driveway. I later found out there was a meth lab in that house, so maybe that had something to do with it.



Awwww...nooooo...How many marbles were in the foreskin?


What's in the foreskin???

Drunken Baker
Feb 3, 2015

VODKA STYLE DRINK
WHAT IS UP YOUTUBE? *claps hands* Welcome back to my story time video. Sorry for the audio problems my equipment is a bit broken today for some reason ohmygod, I don't know. Anyway I'm going to take a break from my fashion tips video to tell you about a ghost story that happened to me and ohmygod I'm getting chills, spooked out just thinking about it, okaaay? Like, three years ago we were in my room and like, the bed is here *gestures wildly* and like, my door is here *gestures wildly* and like, my grandma always said she could see my aura and we have like, esp in are family y'know and one day i woke up and there was a person standing. At. My. Door. *fast cut editing so I don't complete a single sentence coherently* And I was like, is that you dad? But he said "No, go back to sleep honey." And I. FREAKED. OUT. So, yeah, if you like my story LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE and leave a comment and follow me on twitter and instagram and linkedin and myspace and...

WhiteGirlGhostStoryBingo

ghost host
Apr 17, 2010

ain't got no cash
ain't go no style
I really wanted an egg salad sandwich but my bread's best before date was two days before I made the sandwich, but I really wanted one. I didn't see any mold so I figured I was okay.

Now I can't tell my dreams from reality.

It took a while but life is a ride, man. Who cares what's "real". It's all real

Harakiri Potter
Oct 18, 2004

REACH HEAVEN THROUGH VIOLENCE BABY
oh man sit around i have a doozy for you.

so i'm in my basement doing laundry. for a few days now, my dryer has been acting fucky. like, my clothes aren't very dry. clean lint trap, figure, eh, it's gonna die, buy another one.

then my wife leaves me for unknown reasons. she packed up one day and said "have a good life". well, i showed her. then i decide to do my laundry, so i'm drying my clothes. i pull out my hollister shirt and it's wet and i'm like wtf? i cleaned the lint trap.

so i pull the dryer out and decided to check the air duct to the outside. there's something heavy in there, and i take off the clamp and dump it out. for a second there's all this gray wet clumpy lint. then i go to pick it up and there's a dead squirrel laying in it, its eyes bulging out, man i loving screamed like a little girl. then i had a good laugh, bc that poo poo was kinda funny, only to look up and see my wife, she says honey, let's talk

now i am a dad with quadruplets and my marriage suuuuuuucks

rezatahs
Jun 9, 2001

by Smythe

Harry in Rio posted:

oh man sit around i have a doozy for you.

so i'm in my basement doing laundry. for a few days now, my dryer has been acting fucky. like, my clothes aren't very dry. clean lint trap, figure, eh, it's gonna die, buy another one.

then my wife leaves me for unknown reasons. she packed up one day and said "have a good life". well, i showed her. then i decide to do my laundry, so i'm drying my clothes. i pull out my hollister shirt and it's wet and i'm like wtf? i cleaned the lint trap.

so i pull the dryer out and decided to check the air duct to the outside. there's something heavy in there, and i take off the clamp and dump it out. for a second there's all this gray wet clumpy lint. then i go to pick it up and there's a dead squirrel laying in it, its eyes bulging out, man i loving screamed like a little girl. then i had a good laugh, bc that poo poo was kinda funny, only to look up and see my wife, she says honey, let's talk

now i am a dad with quadruplets and my marriage suuuuuuucks

god drat this is the scariest one by far

condolences goonsire

INTERACTIVE CD-ROM
Nov 18, 2005

Love?
I farted in a spare bedroom and it was so bad that i left, closed the door and haven't opened it since. That room is haunted to this day by the ghost of baingan bharta

Jimlit
Jun 30, 2005



I've got some creepy paste for you op

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Serious Frolicking posted:

i posted "anime is good" in multiple threads and the same 3-4 guys went nuts every time

anome belongs in the trash

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer

hth posted:

anome belongs in the trash

your face is an anime and your butt is a virtual pop star.

get spooked

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Jimlit posted:

I've got some creepy paste for you op

Smash it Smash hit
Dec 30, 2009

prettay, prettay
I was walking in a spooky alley one day and then A GHOST!



GBS KING :fyadride:
"and the kingin' is good!"

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
my crepe pasty isn't stolen or a lie, it really happened to me and my awful family :(

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
At this point I was really scared. I slowly unziped my pants, reached in and gingerly pulled out my scroat... i stretched it slightly and turned it so I could see the underside. A cold chill went up my spine as my eyes looked at the horrible sight.

CAUTION: GRAPHIC INTENSIVE IMAGERY AHEAD

If you do not want to hear the gory description details fast forward to 13:32.

The underneath of my ball sack looked like heck, I gasped for breath as I saw what it looked like. Very gross and bad. It was not normal at all. where there had once been normal sac skin was now a nightmarish landscape of unspeakable terror. I yelled for Trevor.

"Trevor!" Trevor heard the panic in my voice and came running into the bathroom.

Trevor's eyes followed my eyes down to my crotch. "Oh gawd. Oh lordy lordy lordy."

Trevor backed out of the bathroom as quickly as he had entered. "I'm calling 911!" he yelled from the bedroom.

I dabbed at my scrotum with some tissue but it accomplished nothing.

I looked out the window and saw a creepy clown was watching me from outside, grinning maniacally. The evil clown was holding a large butchers knife and waving at me. I would have thought nothing of it but heres the thing:

Our apartment is on the 4th floor.

I never walked home alone after that again. So, to the creepy floating killer clown, lets not meet.

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer

Gatekeeper posted:

my crepe pasty isn't stolen or a lie, it really happened to me and my awful family :(

I got really creeped out by your story gatekeeper, but remember this is a TRUE STORIES thread. okay?

Smash it Smash hit
Dec 30, 2009

prettay, prettay
btw dont read my story with the LIGHTS off :ohdear:


GBS KING :fyadride:
"and the kingin' is good!"

a bone to pick
Sep 14, 2011

by FactsAreUseless
I'm haunted by phantom farts, they follow me wherever I go but only I can hear and smell them.

Ork of Fiction
Jul 22, 2013
So, this story happened to me, just this very day. I went to work, as usual, just like any other day, in the normal fashion, as I do all of the time, and everything was regular and the same as always. Little did I know, but something, actually, had changed from before and was now different from what I had come to expect... For someone had changed the usual hand sanitizer lotion with Halloween-themed sweet pumpkin cinnamon scented hand sanitizer! Now my hands smell like that stuff and it's freaking me out!!!

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois
my anus is bleeding my spoon is too big i hosed twiggy logroll diggs

Friginator
May 13, 2014

by zen death robot
One time I was eating a big bowl of Mr. Brain's pork-filled faggots when suddenly THE HOLOCAUST HAPPENED.

naem
May 29, 2011

Gatekeeper
Aug 3, 2003

He was warrior and mystic, ogre and saint, the fox and the innocent, chivalrous, ruthless, less than a god, more than a man.
that's the worst format for telling stories :( i wish it never got popularized by those weird bad websites

butt implants
Oct 16, 2004

i'm gay
what video game were u going to play

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
Subscriber story from HotPony91:

I have been wanting to write this story down for a while now and share it but I am not the best writer so I'm pretty nonplussed to put this story into words. Anyways bear with me and I think you'll be happy and properly spooked out, I know I was because its real and it happened to me!

Firstly a little backstory on myself, I'm currently working as a private fitness trainer in Hollywood, CA and drive a Maserati Ghibli to my appointments. I am also dating a famous actress who I cant name but you guys would know who she was she is very hot and famous plus she lets me do butt stuff to her which is very important and makes her feel important as well.

But on to the story, this happened to me when I was about 19 yrs old. I was house sitting in Malibu at the time and it was the house of a famous movie director , dont get me wrong at this point I'm a very fit and tall guy, 6' 3" and was lifting weights like crazy and running on the beach every day. I was pretty much a golden skinned god and I had no trouble with the ladies getting them to notice me, I was a real head-turner aslo who knows 4 different kinds of martial arts. Not somebody you'd want to mess with and the events of that night terrified even me.

Anyways to continue with the story: I was getting snacky from swimming all day in the pool of the house I was house-sitting and I decided to take a quick jog down the hill to the nearby convenience market to get some loving granola bars or some poo poo like that. to snack on. It is dark out and the last of the sunrise was just setting over the cliffs. I get to the store and a cold sensation shivers up my spine as I enter the place. The indian fellow working the counter greets me friendly enough but I can tell... something just isnt right... you know the feeling i'm talking about its just something in your gut that says "danger". is nearby.

So i'm wandering around the store looking at the snacks when I see it. Outwardly it looked like an old lady wearing a burgundy shawl adjusting her reading glasses to better see the canned food she was holding, but I sensed something more, something ancient, something evil. The old woman thing looked up at me then, eyes as cold as ice staring into me, through me beyond me. I froze. waves of meanace radiated from this woman. I don't know how I found the courage, maybe there is something, some larger force than just what human knows about that watches over us and protects us from darker forces that would harm us. I broke her gaze and stumbled into the next aisle gasping for breath.

I forgot about getting a snack and just went outside. Thats where I met this slammin blonde beach bunny that was hanging out in her Fiat 500 in the parking lot. i told her i thought she was crazy hot and she liked the look of me so she gave me a lift back to the house and we hosed on every single surface. I'm talking bareback railing of the spoogetastic kind. She had a ridiculous body that seemed specially built for sex, and she know how to use it. We must have 69'd 69 times. I will never forget the three days we spent getting down and funky, spreading DNA all over that directors pad. I hope nobody ever gets murdered in that house because the pigs will be knocking down my door looking to gently caress me the way i was loving that blonde goddess. So, to the police investigating that future murder, lets not meet.

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BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Very scared for the future of writing after reading some of these stories.

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