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Les Os
Mar 29, 2010
as far as I can figure its like 300 banking/political families including the Rothschilds and Rockefellers and not Beyonce or Hillary Clinton but idk what they actually are all about or what their motives are other than staying the illuminati whatever loving good that does you. henry kissinger is their friend and mine too

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moller
Jan 10, 2007

Swan stole my music and framed me!


EDIT: :sax:

moller has issued a correction as of 10:22 on May 28, 2017

Bear Retrieval Unit
Nov 5, 2009

Mudslide Experiment
hello

Tokamak
Dec 22, 2004

ORBS

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Les Os posted:

as far as I can figure its like 300 banking/political families including the Rothschilds and Rockefellers and not Beyonce or Hillary Clinton but idk what they actually are all about or what their motives are other than staying the illuminati whatever loving good that does you. henry kissinger is their friend and mine too

It depends on who's doing the telling

It could be as simple as "an elitist good ol' boy organization", it could be as complected as "depopulate the earth for Lizard men"

Bip Roberts
Mar 29, 2005
JEORBS

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend
I'm in the illuminati, and all I want is the perfect orgasm, which can only be accomplished through the elimination of the middle class

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

The danger from secret societies is a old fear in America with a long history, though it used to be Catholics and Masons

TBH if you think of online communities that use democratic mod processes, (like slashdot, Reddit, Digg etc) they always get taken over by a cabal with an agenda, so maybe it's not a loony fear

Put it this way, if the Illuminati was in charge and they wanted to get rid of the excess population in America, they'd engineer a disease with a very expensive cure. They'd also do everything to hide their existence

Instead the GOP is fine with treason as long as it gets the super-rich another tax cut and they get to wreck Obamacare

The second one is not hidden or subtle, not even slightly

ThndrShk2k
Nov 3, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo
Bread Liar

Nebakenezzer posted:

Put it this way, if the Illuminati was in charge and they wanted to get rid of the excess population in America, they'd engineer a disease with a very expensive cure. They'd also do everything to hide their existence
The oligarchs are already doing this and it's super obvious that they are. Hardly anything the Illuminati would do.

:sad:

You seem to misunderstand what the Illuminati is and is for.

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

ThndrShk2k posted:

The oligarchs are already doing this and it's super obvious that they are. Hardly anything the Illuminati would do.

:sad:

You seem to misunderstand what the Illuminati is and is for.

I get 'hidden'; that's what I'm saying the evil cabal couldn't be more obvious

it kinda undercuts the appeal of the Illuminati really

when it was the '90s and America was being changed by NAFTA a person could really sink his teeth into secret people using invisible hands to guide events

ThndrShk2k
Nov 3, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo
Bread Liar
:thunk:

Baloogan
Dec 5, 2004
Fun Shoe
I used to think that a good chunk of the poo poo going on was managed by some sort of vague group of v rich influential people (maybe set up during the cold war, but lost its reason to exist after the USSR fell and the people in it just kept doing what they were doing) then trump got elected and lol its pretty obvious now that no one is running the asylum.

Mia Wasikowska
Oct 7, 2006


hth

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Baloogan posted:

I used to think that a good chunk of the poo poo going on was managed by some sort of vague group of v rich influential people (maybe set up during the cold war, but lost its reason to exist after the USSR fell and the people in it just kept doing what they were doing) then trump got elected and lol its pretty obvious now that no one is running the asylum.

Given the disconnect of the beltway vs. the rest of the country can you imagine how out of it a group who only listens to their other members would be, and they are all super wealthy

Baloogan
Dec 5, 2004
Fun Shoe

Nebakenezzer posted:

Given the disconnect of the beltway vs. the rest of the country can you imagine how out of it a group who only listens to their other members would be, and they are all super wealthy

I'm not quite sure where the label came from but I've always called this conspiracy theory "red suspenders" or "the bankers in the red suspenders"

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Baloogan posted:

I used to think that a good chunk of the poo poo going on was managed by some sort of vague group of v rich influential people (maybe set up during the cold war, but lost its reason to exist after the USSR fell and the people in it just kept doing what they were doing) then trump got elected and lol its pretty obvious now that no one is running the asylum.

the CIA were doing this in belgium and brutally murdered a bunch of people for no reason

Blockade
Oct 22, 2008


That video game guy really nailed what's wrong with tumblr/reddit/4chan/something awful.

mags
May 30, 2008

I am a congenital optimist.
we're mostly into keggers and orchestrating coups

mags
May 30, 2008

I am a congenital optimist.
and heavy into ORB worship

2DCAT
Jun 25, 2015

pissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssss sssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssss

Gravy Boat 2k

Heelllllloooooooooooo

Baloogan
Dec 5, 2004
Fun Shoe
oh i also think there is a conspiracy thats intended to reduce people's faith in journalism.

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

^^ That's more a corruption brought on by decades of government indolence and stockholders eroding an institution for short term profit

Baloogan posted:

I'm not quite sure where the label came from but I've always called this conspiracy theory "red suspenders" or "the bankers in the red suspenders"

We have a whole 'nother thread for quoting Deus Ex, but the game got me thinking about how such a conspiracy would actually work and what its goals would be

I've reached a few conclusions about Illuminati-like conspiracies:

* In order to last, they would have to be based around something other than self interest. While "evil selfish richers" is a pretty obvious go-to for this sorta thing, I think such a group would be about as cohesive as a bunch of silicon valley/finance bros. They'd betray and murder each other at the earliest opportunity

* If you are going to do something evil, be sure to make it not a secret and tell everyone about it. It's a weird quirk of human psychology, but I think if you want something to seem valuable and powerful, make it a secret. Then people will drive themselves crazy trying to discover those secrets and will publicize them. If you want to be ignored and quite possibly not taken seriously by most people, publish a book or keep a website. Hitler wrote Mein Kampf and told everyone how he was going to Make Germany Great Again by seizing land in the east. The Straussians said "yeah, we're going to tell lies to make society better." Pol Pot's dissertation at the Sorbonne was a particularly unhinged communist manifesto about how many classes had to be liquidated to make full communism now. The GOP in all its modern incarnations have been totally upfront about how they were, to use Nietzsche's term, a "rude brotherhood": an organization with a us vs. them ideology which was really just a beard for taking other people's poo poo. The Nazis and the communists also fit nicely in here-

rudatron
May 31, 2011

by Fluffdaddy
How do i get in on this illuminati business

Where do i send my resume

Pener Kropoopkin
Jan 30, 2013

All I wanna do is put my zooma-zoom-zoom in ya boom-boom

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

rudatron posted:

How do i get in on this illuminati business

Where do i send my resume

We could make our own Illuminati :)

We will have absolutely no power, tho

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Baloogan posted:

oh i also think there is a conspiracy thats intended to reduce people's faith in journalism.

i think thats caused by them being total poo poo personally

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Jose posted:

i think thats caused by them being total poo poo personally

It'd be like saying there's a conspiracy to make the Republicans look like total assholes who only care about America's oligarchs

Fidel Castronaut
Dec 25, 2004

Houston, we're Havana problem.
It's just Beyonce and Jay-Z at this point. They defeated everyone else.

Captain_Maclaine
Sep 30, 2001

Every moment I'm alive, I pray for death!
:sax:

2DCAT
Jun 25, 2015

pissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssss sssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssss

Gravy Boat 2k
It's me, I'm the illuminati. To be honest, I just drink a lot tho.

SpaceGoku
Jul 19, 2011

in my experience the free masons are dudes who just sit around and complain about their wives and sometimes organize charity events for local fixtures

so if the illuminati is like the super saiyan version of the free masons then it's just a bunch of dudes who REALLY hate their wives and sometimes raise money for charity

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Fidel Castronaut posted:

It's just Beyonce and Jay-Z at this point. They defeated everyone else.

What would you call that Illuminati

hip hop Illuminati

Destiny's Child conspiracy

mags
May 30, 2008

I am a congenital optimist.
more like chilluminati eh? :rznv: :420: :2bong: :350: :okpos:

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

mister magpie posted:

more like chilluminati eh? :rznv: :420: :2bong: :350: :okpos:

This is a good idea

A Illuminati that expanded its influence with killer weed, the music of Bob Marley, and chocolate milk would be unstoppable

Crowsbeak
Oct 9, 2012

by Azathoth
Lipstick Apathy
They are nothing more then a bunch of pretentious old men playing at running the world. MJ12 is the future. Soon there will be order again. Aquinas spoke of a city on a hill, and they will be crowned it's kings!

Rushi
Jun 2, 2003

by Smythe
who: dick cheney
wants: blood for oil

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Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Crowsbeak posted:

They are nothing more then a bunch of pretentious old men playing at running the world. MJ12 is the future. Soon there will be order again. Aquinas spoke of a city on a hill, and they will be crowned it's kings!

Or better than kings...DOGS.

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