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EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
Dear Richard letters, obviously.

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Kirk Vikernes
Apr 26, 2004

Count Goatnackh

The thirteenth letter of the alphabet
Is the letter m
Stands for marijuana
The way that it oughta
The way a letter oughta

YeahTubaMike
Mar 24, 2005

*hic* Gotta finish thish . . .
Doctor Rope
letters that you can put lines through are the best, like ø and z

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Nurge posted:

It's this, OP



What always cracks me up over this is how weirdly victorian and specific it is. Like, alright, you need to have a specific school girl farting rear end-play fixation.
I've read these letters before, but was there ever any shown evidence that she responded in kind saying, "Yep I loved being pounded in the butt and fartin' all over!" Not that there's anything wrong with that, as it goes, it's just so...bizarre.

It just amazes me that the dude had some kind of weird fart fixation. Anal? Sure. I gotcha, pal. Distinctly listening for different types of farts? Buddy that's a step up for you.

ninjoatse.cx
Apr 9, 2005

Fun Shoe
Not X

poorlifedecision
Feb 13, 2012
Lipstick Apathy
A #1

That Robot
Sep 16, 2004

ask me anything about robots
Buglord
X, op

It's just so fun.

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
&

esperterra
Mar 24, 2010

SHINee's back




Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
That's just a drawing of a house with its roof falling off!

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

5

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

Obsidianheart
Apr 26, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.
Dear John,

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

G for Goku

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

that should be K for Kakarot

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

Rutibex posted:

that should be K for Kakarot

m'bad

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

K

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

for kakarot

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

Genesplicer
Oct 19, 2002

I give your invention the worst grade imaginable: An A-minus-minus!

Total Clam

dudeness posted:

w because it's two u but it looks like two v, real man of mystery that boy.

Definitely W. It's the only one that's more than one syllable.

Second Hand Meat Mouth
Sep 12, 2001

w but pronounced wubbleyou

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
Gonna go with Ö because i'm a pretentious rear end in a top hat

Sekenr
Dec 12, 2013




Sagan posted:

The best letter is X

What kind of uncivilized mud eating dirt people think any letter other than that tops the chart?

Ж

Cynic Jester
Apr 11, 2009

Let's put a simile on that face
A dazzling simile
Twinkling like the night sky
æøåÆØÅ

Rakosi
May 5, 2008

D&D: HASBARA SQUAD
NO-QUARTERMASTER


From the river (of Palestinian blood) to the sea (of Palestinian tears)
the best letter is zed.

not zee you neanderthals.

Obsidianheart
Apr 26, 2017

Throwing off the shadow of a better man.
The best letters are safety pinned to your shirt and begin "To whom it may concern,".

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016

ϡ

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

Rakosi posted:

the best letter is zed.

not zee you neanderthals.

now i'm conflicted:

what is better, Dragonball Zee or Lord Zed?

Rakosi
May 5, 2008

D&D: HASBARA SQUAD
NO-QUARTERMASTER


From the river (of Palestinian blood) to the sea (of Palestinian tears)
the letter 'z' is called zed.

zee is not a letter. hope that helps

the pronunciation in a word is the same which is the only reason you american heathens have gotten away with it so long

Tiny Bug Child
Sep 11, 2004

Avoid Symmetry, Allow Complexity, Introduce Terror
in college i had a physics professor who was canadian and whenever he said Z he said "zed" and the first couple times he did it the whole class started laughing. it was pretty funny

Cynic Jester
Apr 11, 2009

Let's put a simile on that face
A dazzling simile
Twinkling like the night sky
Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!

O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou shalt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, gently caress thy mother.

Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw thine own mother!

So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding pigs for the Christians. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!

- Koshovyi otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian Host.

Vato
Jan 14, 2018

J, because not all languages have it.

Duke Pukem
Oct 23, 2010

Three cheers for dark beer!


ö

mostly because of Motörhead

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



I will never reveal the sigma squad secret

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

งู

TheWeepingHorse
Nov 20, 2009

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reply_of_the_Zaporozhian_Cossacks

Vato
Jan 14, 2018


That is a good letter.

nullEntityRNG
Jun 23, 2010

Mostly pseudo-random.

Mooey Cow posted:

S is the best letter.

In my opinion, no copyright infringement intended.

Listen to this person. So many good words come from s.

Like sex. :grin:

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

Put it in н

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beer gas canister
Oct 30, 2007

shmups are da best come play some shmups they're cheap and good and you like them
Plaster Town Cop

James Joyce posted:

8 December 1909: 44 Fontenoy Street, Dublin

My sweet little whorish Nora,

I did as you told me, you dirty little girl, and pulled myself off twice when I read your letter. I am delighted to see that you do like being hosed arseways. Yes, now I can remember that night when I hosed you for so long backwards. It was the dirtiest loving I ever gave you, darling. My prick was stuck up in you for hours, loving in and out under your upturned rump. I felt your fat sweaty buttocks under my belly and saw your flushed face and mad eyes. At every gently caress I gave you your shameless tongue come bursting out through your lips and if I gave you a bigger stronger gently caress than usual fat dirty farts came spluttering out of your backside. You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I hosed them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole. It is wonderful to gently caress a farting woman when every gently caress drives one out of her. I think I would know Nora’s fart anywhere. I think I could pick hers out in a roomful of farting women. It is a rather girlish noise not like the wet windy fart which I imagine fat wives have. It is sudden and dry and dirty like what a bold girl would let off in fun in a school dormitory at night. I hope Nora will let off no end of her farts in my face so that I may know their smell also.

You say when I go back you will suck me off and you want me to lick your oval office, you little depraved blackguard. I hope you will surprise me some time when I am asleep dressed, steal over me with a whore’s glow in your slumbrous eyes, gently undo button after button in the fly of my trousers and gently take out your lover’s fat mickey, lap it up in your moist mouth and suck away at it till it gets fatter and stiffer and comes off in your mouth. Sometime too I shall surprise you asleep, lift up your skirts and open your hot drawers gently, then lie down gently by you and begin to lick lazily round your bush. You will begin to stir uneasily then I will lick the lips of my darling’s oval office. You will begin to groan and grunt and sigh and fart with lust in your sleep. Then I will lick up faster and faster like a ravenous dog until your oval office is a mass of slime and your body wriggling wildly.

Goodnight, my little farting Nora, my dirty little fuckbird! There is one lovely word, darling, you have underlined to make me pull myself off better. Write me more about that and yourself, sweetly, dirtier, dirtier.

JIM

e;fb :cripes:

beer gas canister fucked around with this message at 04:35 on Dec 1, 2018

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