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Shout out to the “I had this one hosed up teacher” derail in the PYF hosed up article thread. Share stories of teachers drunk on the job, throwing things at students, saying wild things, whatever fits. Ideally keep in mind that teaching is a difficult position and oftentimes paid pennies to play babysitter. Also keep in mind that some people are very much not meant to be teachers. Anyway, I once had a HS English teacher that lasted for about a month since the boys would make really weird comments about her rear end! She chained herself to her car on a highway apparently afterwards. She was a young teacher and I always felt so bad for her (namely because I went to school with some horrendous boys who turned into mediocre men, oh Long Island). The classes she taught were replaced with a teacher who stayed home when it rained due to the “water fairies”. I never pressed further.
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Dec 17, 2018 06:59
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My art/religion teacher was certified insane. Back in the mid nineties, Quebec still had official Catholic School classes during normal school hours. Study bible, teacher, moral lessons, the whole shebang. In highschool, the one we got for this was... Well, Mrs. B (I don't even remember her full name, she was always just Mrs. B) was a bit kookoo. I believe she actually through she was speaking to Angels, or to God, quite a bit. She thought I had sleeping sickness (or narcolepsy) because I was always tired, and tried to get my mom to bring me into the hospital to get treated (My mom is a nurse, she was just baffled and confused). Overall my teachers were pretty alright. Gradeschool was mostly the students I hated, the teachers were good (My grade six teacher was a photographer and he would take pictures all over the province. We would regularly end fridays, last period, with a slideshow of all his nature and wildlife photos, he was awesome. Had a friend who once said 'IF I GET HIM ILL COMPLAIN TO THE ADMIN BECAUSE HES SHOWING PICTURES INSTEAD OF TEACHING MATHS". I stopped being friends with him, I pretend it's over other serious personality problems but really its because he was a bootlicker who would narc out the coolest teacher in school) edit: loving THING POSTED BEFORE I WAS DONE RAGE
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Dec 17, 2018 08:21
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One year our biology teacher got divorced and was rendered completely unable to function day to day, let alone do his job, for the whole year. He'd show up when class started, take attendance, then retreat to a back room and leave us alone with the biology department's collection of educational VHS tapes for junior high students. More often than not he wouldn't come back and we'd wait for the bell and let ourselves out. Once we'd caught how this was gonna go on we started bringing our own movies from home. On a few occasions he wouldn't show up at all. I remember one exam that was just five or six basic questions scribbled haphazardly on a sheet. Poor guy, you know, but in retrospect, someone should have stepped in on that hard.
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Dec 17, 2018 11:26
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I had an extremely lovely high school. One chemistry teacher rage quit, so the other one was forced to teach all the classes until we got a sub. That wasn't so bad but the sub was an extremely weird dude who taught us the wrong things for like 6 weeks and then the final exam was like, "Whelp, our bad? guess we have to dumb it down!! Make it open book!" Some enterprising student in 1st period got all the answers and then passed it down to every period so we all passed despite knowing gently caress all. Because even open book exams are difficult if you don't know how in the gently caress to do anything or what anything should look like, etc. Also our senior geometry teacher rage quit and the sub just did bullshit worksheets/talked about his childhood in Michigan the whole period for about a month or two and then the computer science teacher gave up his free period to try and teach us but discovered that of course we knew jack all about geometry. I know more about growing up playing on the ice on the lakes of Michigan than geometry. That same computer science teacher gave up about 2 weeks into both of the classes and just let us gently caress around online and copy programs from the book while he played Dumb and Dumber over and over until the end of the semester. There were legit questions about that goddamn movie on our finals. Both finals, geometry and computer science just...Dumb and Dumber finals questions. I hate that movie so, so much. I can't do math beyond simple poo poo today. e: Forgot our new Spanish teacher. She was totally unbalanced. Would assign us projects and then deny that she'd done so even though we worked on it all day. She did this poo poo all the time. She would tell us bullshit about Mexico like "everyone carries their small dogs because the pollution would kill them if they walked". Just straight up insanity about the culture would pour out of her. I really doubt she'd ever been to Mexico. Also exclusively ate cold McDonald's cheeseburgers for breakfast. empty sea has a new favorite as of 11:35 on Dec 17, 2018 |
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Dec 17, 2018 11:32
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Pretty mild compared to most of these, but my middle school PE teacher was a crusty old Korean war vet who didn't give a poo poo. Temp below 50? Guess we're staying in the gym, start running laps. He also cursed like a sailor.
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Dec 17, 2018 12:09
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My school had a teacher who was arrested for having child pornography. I was never in any of his classes but I heard he once played a video about Josef Stalin (he was a history teacher) and had taped over the end of it with (regular) porn. There was one art teacher who I personally got on well enough with despite my being terrible at art because I knew the answers to all his trivia questions. But in one other class he got in a bit of trouble for telling one pupil, "You'd better have a good sleeping bag because you're going to be a tramp when you grow up," and on hearing that another wanted to join the army, saying, "You're going to leave school with no qualifications, join the army, get shot and then hope you die because the health service is so crap."
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Dec 17, 2018 13:13
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When I started primary school there was a dedicated music teacher at my school but it was just a regular classroom teacher who'd been assigned the job because she could play the piano a little bit. After a few years of that we got a new music teacher who actually knew stuff about music. The problem with her was that she was incredibly easy to distract. Practically every lesson was derailed when someone asked her about her weekend or her holidays or something - or she just started talking about random stuff completely unprompted. She was really interested in the use of music in advertising, and always said she'd been taping commercials off the TV that had interesting music and she was definitely going to bring the tape in to show us at some point. In four years I never saw that tape. My year 7 maths teacher was great because he just assigned questions from the textbook and then played Age of Empires the whole lesson, so it was really easy to partner up and each do half the questions then copy the rest of the answers. He also ran LAN parties at the school on weekends. In year 10 I had one teacher for both English Language and Psychology. She frequently got stuff wrong but would never admit it. I specifically remember one time she was explaining dependent and independent variables, and she got them around the wrong way. When someone pointed out that the textbook said the opposite, she stopped and read the textbook in silence for a moment and then told us the textbook was wrong. She also insisted that the word "versus" was an example of a contraction because you write it "v's". The best though was my SOSE teacher one year. The first class, we all came in and sat down wherever, and she got out a chart she'd printed out of the table layout, wrote all our names on it and told us we had to sit in those same seats for the whole year because she wasn't going to learn our names. I sat next to a friend of mine, Joel, and the two of us were constantly being yelled at for talking too much or too loudly; not, I think, because we were actually any worse than anyone else though. As evidence I cite the fact that I heard this teacher yell at Joel to be quiet on a day he was at home sick. She also had a habit of sending people out of the class for "being disruptive". There was a policy at the school that if a teacher sent you out of class they had to fill in a form explaining why. She never did that, and it was obviously because she knew that she was doing it way too much. On at least one occasion she ended up sitting inside on her own for the last ten minutes or so because she'd sent literally everyone outside.
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Dec 17, 2018 13:44
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Shall I start with the molestation or with the dildo found in the teacher's desk drawer?
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Dec 17, 2018 15:46
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KaiserSchnitzel posted:Shall I start with the molestation or with the dildo found in the teacher's desk drawer? Depends, which did he/she start with?
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Dec 17, 2018 16:04
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Moved to a new school in 8th grade where their math program was way behind the school I left. The student teacher was trying to teach the class but everyone would just turn to me after everything she said so I could explain it. She eventually got frustrated and told me "If you think you can do a better job teaching then come up here and do it" to which I did and she stormed out of the classroom crying never to be seen again. Had a High School coach/teacher that would open the window and start yelling poo poo in made up German when he saw the ROTC out there.
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Dec 17, 2018 17:50
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In junior high the band teacher got fired because he got tired of one kid's poo poo during parade practice and threw him against a fence, not pushed no, pulled by the arm out of formation and thrown WWE steel cage style against the fence surrounding the school ground, the rest of us kept going because no one liked the stupid bastard. Same kid once got a 20 minute rear end chewing from one of the clarinet players who was normally a complete sweetheart but even she couldn't take his poo poo, we voted her best player in the ensemble for that one.
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Dec 17, 2018 19:27
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I had one chemistry teacher who was as mad as a goose on stilts, but everyone loved him and he could teach us well. First time he ever met me he slapped me around the head because I was my brother's brother (i.e. an insufferable nerd). Perfectly happy with dope-slapping, kicking and hitting people with rulers, but NEVER painfully and he was a right laugh. What a guy.
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Dec 17, 2018 19:39
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I had a twitchy Viet Nam vet teacher drop to the floor screaming when the bomb squad detonated some munitions in the neighboring highschool field. The teacher was out for a couple of days after and being the cool and respectful kids we were we made fun of him incessantly about it behind his back. This was all pre-9/11 so it didn't make much of a news story.
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Dec 17, 2018 20:46
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Few years after High school the second Chem teacher got arrested for soliciting a minor and child porn. There wasn't any talk about him being inappropriate with students before this at all between classmates but well he apparently liked young teens. That was a pretty major scandal I recall.
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Dec 17, 2018 23:46
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My history teacher was also the football coach. Normally he was a pretty laid back guy, but every once and a while his 'coach' attitude would shine through. It was the week of the annual food drive where the school helped the local food bank. Each class was assigned to bring in a certain item like canned green beans, cereal, etc. Our class was assigned baking flour. So, by Friday, many bags of flour had been stacked near the front of the class. We were watching a movie (it was Friday after all), and of course no one was paying attention, there was lots of talking, and so on. After asking us to quiet down several times, our teacher eventually just flipped out and went into full-on coach mode. He was yelling and throwing books and things against the wall, telling us all to shut up. He worked his way up to the front of the class throwing anything he could get his hands on. Well, he happened to pick up one of the flour bags, spiked that thing against the wall as hard as he could and POOF - flour exploded everywhere. Not sure how he explained that one to the janitors, but that was last time we saw him get so angry that semester.
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Dec 18, 2018 03:33
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in high school spanish we had a hilarious teach named Mr. Reyes who hailed from Panama. big fat guy, didn't like to grade anything, rolled around the clasroom in a chair instead of walking and carried a golf club that he'd hit desks with if someone wasn't paying attention. and i learned a shitton of spanish from him. he knew how to make it fun. he was a drat good teacher. one time I stayed home sick (I lived right next to the high school) and he came to my door selling insurance on the side.  he had a bunch of kids. bless you Mr. Reyes,
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Dec 18, 2018 04:15
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I once had a teacher straight creep on my mom. I guess I should preface that with the fact that my mother is a very pretty woman. I'm plain, but my mother is pretty, and has aged well. My aunt had a candle business I worked at, and I sold them around the school (and gave them to teachers I liked ) My ma came by and gave him one, and I saw that loving look. That look some men get when they see a beautiful woman. To this day, I hate it. It gives me the heebie jeebies. So later, he takes me aside and says, "Dick, your mom's real purty. Real purty." "Yeah. She is." I was short with him. He got right up to asking me her number, but pussed out, "I really appreciate the candle. Thanks, Dick." He got that creepy look when he talked about her. I just left and took my seat. Aside from that, he wasn't a bad teacher. I just had undiagnosed dyscalcula and horrible depression, so I wasn't great at learning. A lot of people don't talk about this, but having beautiful parents and being plain yourself is really rough. It didn't help that I wasn't into make up and stuff. But that's beside the point. (God, my ma might show up in this thread, she was a sub. You've never been skeeved until you hear teenage boys talk about wanting to do terrible, vividly sexual things to your mom.) E: I don't have any good stories, because I didn't have him, but we had this massively fat teacher that chose to ride a scooter instead of walk. As in, after work, he would roll to his car, get up, put his scooter in his car and drive away. I never did figure out if Rolly was just lazy or had something wrong with him. He was also massively rude and condescending to students, so whatever it was, I didn't feel bad for him. I also had a nice physics teacher that was like six foot five. One day she walked up on me, surprising me, and I blurted, "God, you're tall!" She sort of sighed and said, "I know." Dating was apparently hard for her. DicktheCat has a new favorite as of 04:47 on Dec 18, 2018 |
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Dec 18, 2018 04:40
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I had an English 101 or something teacher at college that was suuuuper easy to distract. Think we did only 4 essays the whole semester and never did homework, talked about or read the required readings. It was so easy to gently caress off that class that I was actually really pissed about it because I liked reading and learning about poo poo. Also if I missed more than 3 days it was an automatic fail so I had to sit and grit my teeth. She mostly liked to talk a lot about how truckers on the interstate would pull up beside her and see her (dyed) blonde hair and dark skin (she was black) and her tits hanging out and think she was some kind of blonde, tanned beach babe. Imagine that conversation but stretch it out for like an hour a few times a week for the whole semester. Also throw in a random meetup with some friend of her cousin's that flirted with her once at a get together. It was a special sort of hell. Note these truckers, that might or might not have actually existed, didn't do anything but drive beside her for a while. I'm fairly sure the friend didn't do anything but be polite at a cookout, either. She was a very, very thirsty girl. The best English teacher I ever had taught Southern Gothic Lit and would make us take a test on the book before we read it, then tell us how stupid we were while dissecting the books. Basically he taught us backwards and made me realize that sometimes the protagonist can be a real dick and isn't actually the most important or best person. I made a C in that class but that was the only class I ever felt that I actually earned my grade.
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Dec 18, 2018 11:22
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I had a surprisingly rad chemistry teacher back in our high-school equivalent. To look at him, he was a bit of a stereotypical nerd: Always in button-down shirts, tight-laced, rather strict, very competent in his field but not too personable. Pretty much the opposite of the stereotypical "cool" kind of teacher. Or so we thought, until the first time we reached the old "gently caress around during the last week before summer break" stage. At that time most teachers just let us watch random movies or go on fun excursions or whatever, and our chemistry teacher suggested we watch a movie he himself made. We were of course a bit dubious, thinking it was some dumb home video stuff, but we had no idea what we were in for. It turned out to be a pseudo-documentary of himself driving out on the Amazon river, getting out at a random spot, and walking back to civilization through the depths of the rainforest all by himself, documenting his progress all the while. That took him more than a week, entirely alone the whole time, including run-ins with wild animals and indigenous people. And that wasn't the only one of his adventures. He'd done the rainforest thing twice, and on another occasion he crossed the entirety of the African wilderness via bicycle, also all on his own. Basically this motherfucker was Bear Grylls before Bear Grylls was a thing, except actually authentic without a crew to help him out if something went wrong. It was really weird trying to reconcile that badass guy from the videos with the really rather ordinary teacher we'd come to know. I actually looked him up again a while back, and from the looks of it he quit his teaching job and is now busy documenting active volcanos from the air with an ultralight airplane. You do you, man. 
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Dec 18, 2018 12:07
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One of my physics teachers once showed us a power-point slideshow that was the alphabet in breast sizes. I have no idea how he didn't get fired honestly, but I guess it was because everyone loved him. He used to run a lunchtime movie club where we'd all watch terrible Kung-Fu movies on the projector.
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Dec 18, 2018 12:09
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My Lovely Horse posted:One year our biology teacher got divorced and was rendered completely unable to function day to day, let alone do his job, for the whole year. He'd show up when class started, take attendance, then retreat to a back room and leave us alone with the biology department's collection of educational VHS tapes for junior high students. More often than not he wouldn't come back and we'd wait for the bell and let ourselves out. Once we'd caught how this was gonna go on we started bringing our own movies from home. On a few occasions he wouldn't show up at all. I remember one exam that was just five or six basic questions scribbled haphazardly on a sheet. Poor guy, you know, but in retrospect, someone should have stepped in on that hard. We had a biology teacher leave his wife at the end of the school year and when I had her as my English teacher the year after she was a mess and we ended up watching a lot of movies in class while she was on the verge of tears. Also because they had to find a last minute replacement to teach biology I got to take it from a guy who’d been retired for a while who was clearly just doing a favor for some relative of his in the front office who gave zero shits and once gave us a diagram of a cell to fill in and gave us a word bank that was in the order of the questions and then made fun of a kid who filled in his scantron with pen. He was cool and he gave us extra credit for noticing extra stuff during the dissections.
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Dec 18, 2018 21:57
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We had an IT teacher in high school who taught us the first year of a 2-year coursework project and told us before we broke up for summer that we were all on track for top grades and he was very proud of us etc. We came back in September to do the second year of the coursework, only to find that he'd retired and had been teaching some of the wrong coursework, using the wrong marking criteria for the rest and we were actually all failing. The school sent everyone a letter saying that we were welcome to drop the class if we wanted to. Our class went lost about a dozen students but the other class went down to two students. Our school was like a technology specialist school though so they had to change to a science school instead because of it. I stayed on to do IT A-level at the same school and it happened again. We also had a biology teacher who didn't believe in narwhals and thought we were messing with him when we tried to convince him that they were real. I'm told there was also an IT teacher who didn't believe in Mac OS so maybe my high school just had a really bad IT department.
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Dec 20, 2018 01:12
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I went to a small school and there was a lot of staff turnover between junior and senior year. The guy who had been covering physics retired and with all of the classes being juggled around none of the other math or science teachers could cover it, so it got tossed to the new computer teacher who had never taken any physics beyond intro science courses in high school. A lot of homework and test answers wound up being decided by democratic consensus since he didn't know either.
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Dec 20, 2018 06:58
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goldenninjawarrior posted:We had an IT teacher in high school who taught us the first year of a 2-year coursework project and told us before we broke up for summer that we were all on track for top grades and he was very proud of us etc. We came back in September to do the second year of the coursework, only to find that he'd retired and had been teaching some of the wrong coursework, using the wrong marking criteria for the rest and we were actually all failing. The school sent everyone a letter saying that we were welcome to drop the class if we wanted to. Our class went lost about a dozen students but the other class went down to two students. Our school was like a technology specialist school though so they had to change to a science school instead because of it. I stayed on to do IT A-level at the same school and it happened again.  What in the world nightmare school did you go to? That’s gross incompetence
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Dec 20, 2018 07:07
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Went to a poo poo school for grades 7 and 8, our home room teacher would lose his patience quite frequently and one time he threw a desk. At the start of the year he would play classical music on fridays and try to engage us in discussions about it but that didn’t last long. Several teachers were at about the same level of “gently caress it” after a few months. The year after I left I heard the principal just stood up from his desk and walked out the door one day. Never came back, nobody had a clue. Guess he couldn’t handle both misbehaving students and staff.
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Dec 22, 2018 18:27
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My sixth grade home room teacher was an okay guy, had a bit of a temper but only took it out verbally on the kids who were genuinely being little shits and disrupting the class. The odd thing about him were his lunches. The period after our lunch was when our grade had recess, so we'd go run around on the playground for an hour or whatever. Meanwhile, that's when he'd eat his lunch, as our school had a dedicated playground monitor. Now, if was pouring or -20 degrees or lower outside, we'd have recess inside, in the classroom. We'd draw, play board games, just goof off. This was back in the Stone Age when our elementary school was considered top notch for having not one but TWO Apple ][ computers, so if you had good grades and signed up quick enough, you might get to play with that for 15 minutes. Anyways, while I didn't mind indoor recess in general (I loved to draw and didn't like sports), what I did mind was the unholy smell in that room when he ate in there. To this day I have no idea what it was, but always sandwiches. My best guess today, now that I eat all kinds of things, is liverwurst and onions. It smelled like he'd taken a can of potted meat, deviled ham, and a dozen rotten onions and schmeared it on the radiator. The room absolutely reeked, we all noticed it and joked about it. He was a big dude, so there were probably some equally big farts in the mix, too. Plus God help you if you were in his room for whatever class after recess, and he came around to your desk to give you some one-on-one help or check your work. Like I said, big dude, so he breathed pretty heavily, and had apparently never heard of breath mints. He'd waddle over to your desk, huffing and puffing, then lean over your desk "soooo, JD, what's your question" and oh god it's been 34 or so years and I can still smell it. I'd say I was jealous of the kids that had the other home room teacher, but that guy was just an rear end in a top hat.
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Dec 24, 2018 19:38
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I had a great science teacher in 7th grade. His lessons were fun and he made his own work sheets and tried to make the questions relevant to poo poo a 7th grader in 97 would like. His labs were insanely fun and cool. There was just one thing he absolutely 100% would not stand for the students talking while doing non lab work. He walked with a wooden cane and if someone was talking he would slowly raise it up over his granite table thing he did labs and stuff on to deminstrate to us. while making the shh face. Then he would slam it down as hard as possible making a noise that literally made my ears ring and i was in the 3rd row. One time he did this and he hit it weird or something and part of it broke off and smacked a girl in the face. It had cut her face and she had to go to the n urse and then to the hospital. she get 4 stitches down her cheek bone. He was fire'd. That was his final year before being retirement age and I had heard later they screwed him out of his pension but it 3rd hand infomartion that I cant verify. My english teacher in 10th grade was really into music and it happened to be the type of music I liked at the time. Grunge, punk, metal, mixed with some pop alt rock. He got divorced over christmas break. He started openly drinking in class and just not showing up for work and I swear I saw him day drinking on the city library steps one day when I was ditching and going down town. He had a TA who was doing their residency or whatever teachers call it after graduating from college. Before christmas break the TA was teaching the class during the teachers free period and was grading all the work. Around february or something the TA was teaching all 8 periods and actively covering for the now perma drunk teacher. I really liked the class before the divorce and disliked it heavily post divorce. My school had 8 periods and an hour long lunch in highschool and the teachers only taught 7 periods so that TA was extremely stressed and he would fly off the handle and berate students then send them to the vice principal. My sister had the ta as an actual teacher and said he was a great teacher now so it all worked out for him snergle has a new favorite as of 21:47 on Dec 24, 2018 |
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Dec 24, 2018 21:16
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Okay what the hell is it about teachers and divorces.
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Dec 24, 2018 22:25
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