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Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
INT. MIDRIFFGARD - AFTERNOON

A strong and powerful V-King, MR FAGNAR COCKBROKE is arguing with Valkyrie LADY LAGATHA BOOTYLICIOUS. FAGNAR tries to hug LAGATHA but she shakes him off.

FAGNAR
I want you to stay with me!

LAGATHA
I'm sorry Fagnar, but I'm looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away.

FAGNAR
You are the one running away!

LAGATHA frowns.

LAGATHA
I'm sorry, Fagnar. I just don't feel excited by this relationship anymore.

Ragnar lets out a deep sigh

FAGNAR
I am a brave, very strong man. Strong enough to recognize your agency as a woman. I will respect your decision.

LAGATHA leaves.

FAGNAR sits down, looking defeated.

Moments later, sexy V-King JARL BJORN SIDEDICK barges in looking flustered.

FAGNAR
Goodness, Bjorn! Is everything okay?

BJORN
I'm afraid not.

FAGNAR
What is it? Don't keep me in suspense...

BJORN
It's ... an incel ... I saw a disgusting incel threaten a bunch of ladies!

FAGNAR
Defenseless ladies?

BJORN raises an eyebrow

BJORN
Ladies are not defenseless. They are powerful women with a strong, independent spirit. In any case they need our help.

FAGNAR
Bloomin' heck, Bjorn! We've got to do something.

BJORN
I agree, but I wouldn't know where to start.

FAGNAR
You can start by telling me where this happened.

BJORN
I was...

BJORN fans himself and begins to wheeze.

FAGNAR
Focus Bjorn, focus! Where did it happen?

BJORN
Assgard! That's right - Assgard!

FAGNAR springs up and begins to run.


EXT. A ROAD - CONTINUOUS

FAGNAR rushes along the street, followed by BJORN. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.


INT. ASSGARD - SHORTLY AFTER

COKIE ENGLISHMAN a mean incel terrorizes two ladies.

FAGNAR, closely followed by BJORN, rushes towards COKIE, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

BJORN
What is is? What's the matter?

FAGNAR
That's not just any old incel, that's Cokie Englishman!

BJORN
Who's Cokie Englishman?

FAGNAR
Who's Cokie Englishman? Who's Cokie Englishman? Only the most mean incel in the universe!

BJORN
Blinkin' knickers, Fagnar! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most mean incel in the universe!

FAGNAR
You can say that again.

BJORN
Blinkin' knickers, Fagnar! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most mean incel in the universe!

FAGNAR
I'm going to need cum, lots of cum.

Cokie turns and sees Fagnar and Bjorn. He grins an evil grin.

COKIE
Fagnar Cockbroke, we meet again.

BJORN
You've met?

FAGNAR
Yes. It was a long, long time ago...

EXT. A PARK - BACK IN TIME

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Isaac
Aug 3, 2006

Fun Shoe
??

pseudanonymous
Aug 30, 2008

When you make the second entry and the debits and credits balance, and you blow them to hell.
Isn't there supposed to be like an establishing shot or something? I'm not a screenwriter but I thought you had to kind of show the setting.

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

CU of a penis loving an rear end in a top hat.

PULL OUT to show YOUNG COKIE drilling YOUNG FAGNAR outside the dragon's cave.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

pseudanonymous posted:

Isn't there supposed to be like an establishing shot or something? I'm not a screenwriter but I thought you had to kind of show the setting.

Interesting

I chose to start as all bold scriptwriters, in medias SEX (for those not in the know, the pun is related to in medias res, meaning on the middle of the action, although there is no sex in the opening scene)

Maybe you should set the scene

SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


You spelled Fagnar like Ragnar one time you need a better editor

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

Sid Vicious posted:

You spelled Fagnar like Ragnar one time you need a better editor

you got the job!

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

I'm not a big fan and think you shouldn't, op!
Good luck on trying anything else that might be better though and I can't wait to see that instead of this.

Oscar Wild
Apr 11, 2006

It's good to be a G
Can there be a valkyrie queen named Labia Majora with an smaller attendant Labia Minora?

SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


Oscar Wild posted:

Can there be a valkyrie queen named Labia Majora with an smaller attendant Labia Minora?

Only if they are like Russian nesting dolls Valkyries

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



https://i.imgur.com/PJ1f1lV.gifv

like this but with hairy viking cocks

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016

OPENING SHOT OF A MAJESTIC NORDIC MOUNTAIN RANGE (actually the Himalayas because that looks cool)

Opening scroll begins: DENMARK 10 000 BC

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

Big Beef City posted:

I'm not a big fan and think you shouldn't, op!
Good luck on trying anything else that might be better though and I can't wait to see that instead of this.

you can't dissuade me or this forum of their dreams Big Beef City! I dream of giant V-KIng codpieces and Valkyrie maidens

I FEEL

and I LIVE MY PASSION

I have NO TIME for SCRUBS

unpacked robinhood
Feb 18, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
I've already made a 2 hour YouTube dissecting the trailer

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost
rear end guard?

poverty goat posted:

https://i.imgur.com/PJ1f1lV.gifv

like this but with hairy viking cocks

Blurry Gray Thing
Jun 3, 2009
We're going to need to cast at least three actors to play LOKI.

1)A real smug rear end in a top hat dude
2)A sexy giant lady
3)A sexy horse

I want all of them cast properly and working together, they'll see a LOT of play, some of the other forms might be one-offs but these are going to carry the show.

And yes we're having LOKI, are you crazy, we have an excuse to use him and we're going to take it he (and she) are going to have a LOT of sex scenes.

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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Blurry Gray Thing posted:

We're going to need to cast at least three actors to play LOKI.

1)A real smug rear end in a top hat dude
2)A sexy giant lady
3)A sexy horse

I want all of them cast properly and working together, they'll see a LOT of play, some of the other forms might be one-offs but these are going to carry the show.

And yes we're having LOKI, are you crazy, we have an excuse to use him and we're going to take it he (and she) are going to have a LOT of sex scenes.

Loki is all three of those things

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