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I used to work near a "dueling piano bar". It was mostly frequented by groups of drunk boomers who got there by boat. There were lots of ruddy sunbaked kankle women with white capris and "speak to the manager" haircuts. Lots of guys leaning against the outdoor dining area railing smoking and smirking because they "aren't technically on the patio" as they cheekily reached over the railing for their 9th Miller Lite. The centerpiece of this bar was a stage with two pianos, helmed by two pianists with tip jars next to their portion of the stage. The idea is that you put some money into the jar, make a request, and the pianist plays/sings the song. The pianists are meant to get into it and play faster, and with more feeling to garner favor from the audience and attract more tips and requests. This particular place, it never worked. Every time I would walk by there would be no piano music playing, empty tip jars, and drunk boomers shouting "play somethin'!" at the stage. I actually heard one of the piano players shout back "For the last time, if you want me to play Bohemian Rhapsody, its a six minute song, you've got to put some money in the jar buddy". The players were nearly always being harassed/bullied by boomer aged women. They would slur/yell poo poo like "aww he doesn't even know how to play it haar haaar" and the like. The whole idea of the place was meant to be audience participation, and the audience there simply refused to participate because it would mean them putting a tenner in some guy's jar. Well, thats my story about the really sad dueling piano bar.
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Aug 27, 2020 05:24
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 05:24 |
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Billy Joel sucks
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Aug 27, 2020 05:31
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Bob Dylan sucks
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Aug 27, 2020 05:31
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imagine if they played "dueling banjos' ...but on the PIANO
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Aug 27, 2020 05:37
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I saw this once at foxwood casino. It was on like Friday night and the place is packed and two pianos and they could sing too and they were making a fortune.
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Aug 27, 2020 05:40
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A cowboy themed steakhouse featuring dueling cowbells. You're welcome.
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Aug 27, 2020 05:49
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Why would I pay for live music when I could just sit at home and listen to music on youtube? Checkmate pianists.
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Aug 27, 2020 05:49
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSIw0nD5GT0
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Aug 27, 2020 05:52
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I. M. Gei posted:Billy Joel sucks
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Aug 27, 2020 06:10
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They put bread in my jar and piss in the jar, breaded up piss jar, start snacking on the bread that's soaked thru with piss, just gnashing at these soapy, soggy piss breads. Love playing at this bar, love the tips here.
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Aug 27, 2020 06:13
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Welp we know where all the boat paraders for Trump hang out now
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Aug 27, 2020 06:27
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Spinz posted:I saw this once at foxwood casino. It was on like Friday night and the place is packed and two pianos and they could sing too and they were making a fortune. Yeah I feel like it could've been awesome but this drunk by 6pm Ohio boat crowd was too lame to get into it and just loving tip talented musicians.
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Aug 27, 2020 07:41
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oh yeah, the dueling piano bar. I'm sure it's still a thing but it also feels like, very 2000's? anyway, I've been to a couple and I was impressed by the skill of the dudes playing, but I also hated it.I. M. Gei posted:Bob Dylan sucks also that
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Aug 27, 2020 09:17
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Blind Melon sucks
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Aug 27, 2020 11:14
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They sit at the bar, put no bread in my jar...and say "man, get the gently caress outta here"
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Aug 27, 2020 11:31
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thanks for the thinly veiled parable about the something awful forums, OP
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Aug 27, 2020 12:14
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That's like half a loaf of sourdough, so get to tickling those ivories
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Aug 27, 2020 13:07
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Two piano players sit there refusing to play anything and are surprised that no one wants to tip them? I think my brilliant business brain has spotted a flaw in this plan.
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Aug 27, 2020 13:15
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Sunswipe posted:Two piano players sit there refusing to play anything and are surprised that no one wants to tip them? I think my brilliant business brain has spotted a flaw in this plan. That's like the union/job joke. "Play us something!" "Gimme a tip first." "Well, what should I give a tip for?" "Me playing the piano."
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Aug 27, 2020 13:48
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who the gently caress even brings bread with them in to a bar
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Aug 27, 2020 13:50
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Fagmaster posted:who the gently caress even brings bread with them in to a bar
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Aug 27, 2020 14:15
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:thanks for the thinly veiled parable about the something awful forums, OP lol
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Aug 27, 2020 14:18
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Man, what are you doing here
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Aug 27, 2020 14:21
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Struttin' on down to dueling pianos bar. Two loaves of Wonder Bread tucked under my arms. I'm feeling generous tonight.
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Aug 27, 2020 14:24
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Sunswipe posted:Two piano players sit there refusing to play anything and are surprised that no one wants to tip them? I think my brilliant business brain has spotted a flaw in this plan. They're human jukeboxes. Except if I give them $20 they won't play Sweet Home Alabama 13 times, which is fuckin bullshit
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Aug 27, 2020 14:38
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This crowd only gets drunk by 6 pm? Pox on these late comers, that's no way to go about drinking.
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Aug 27, 2020 15:32
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Dueling penists
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Aug 27, 2020 19:07
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duel pianist, leave this place. this is my bread and you can't have any
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Aug 27, 2020 20:17
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sing me the song of the piano men sing me that song tonight cause we're all in the mood for a melody and i'm sure that my tip will be light
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Aug 28, 2020 01:37
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I got no bread, see?
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Aug 28, 2020 02:08
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People still use physical currency to pay for goods and services? Maybe they would have been more successful if they had an app or something. Then you could get situations like this: https://twitter.com/HenpeckedHal/status/1206745619030659073
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Aug 28, 2020 02:18
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Roundabout posted:People still use physical currency to pay for goods and services? Maybe they would have been more successful if they had an app or something. Then you could get situations like this: 
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Aug 28, 2020 02:22
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Bruce Springsteen sucks
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Aug 28, 2020 04:16
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Smarter pianists would have kept playing really bad songs for free so customers paid them to play something else.
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Aug 28, 2020 04:48
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Piano man, wear the mask.
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Aug 28, 2020 04:52
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