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Zaurg But A Horse
Apr 14, 2019

Zaurg? Neigh!
if I pull a cart extra good one week and bring home 20% more grain, then eat most of it

then next week I spill too many grain and end up with 15% less

how do numbers work? I am horse, not math man.

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moana
Jun 18, 2005

one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web
It's okay, I'm a mathematician. The problem here is you are talking about percents. Let's break that down. Per cents. Cents are pennies, which used to be made out of copper. Today they are mostly zinc. But you're a horse, so what do you need zinc for? Any modern horseshoe today (and you seem like a modern kind of horse) is made out of STEEL. The only year that cents were made out of steel is 1943. 1+9+4+3 = 17, and 1+7 = 8, which makes sense because you ate most of the grain and that's your problem - overindulging in grains. The solution to your problem is easy, then - you have to stop eating so many grains, as a percentage of your overall diet. The FDA recommends a varied diet of nutrients, which includes fiber (which you already have too much of) as well as other nutrients. What are those other nutrients? Stuff like Niacin, Vitamin A, and what else? That's right, zinc. Start eating your cents instead of eating grains to get your daily recommended allowance of zinc. But check the dates first - the pennies from 1943 you can use for your shoes. Because if your shoes wear out, you won't even be able to pull your cart to market to GET the grains in the first place.

Also, you can totally eat grain that's been spilled on the ground. Get off of your loving high horse.

Zaurg But A Horse
Apr 14, 2019

Zaurg? Neigh!
This makes cents. Thank you.

Dik Hz
Feb 22, 2004

Fun with Science

I think your fundamental problem is that you're being a follower and not a leader. Sometimes you have to go against the grain.

Sundae
Dec 1, 2005

Dik Hz posted:

I think your fundamental problem is that you're being a follower and not a leader.

Absolutely. You should never put the cart before the horse.

alnilam
Nov 10, 2009

Throw those extra grains into the oat futures market, so you can get more oats, in the future

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Tomfoolery
Oct 8, 2004

Have you considered bitcoin? Why don't you get it straight from the horse's mouth, right into your mouth.

https://www.thetechequestrian.com/home/2017/12/15/buy-your-horse-with-a-bitcoin

quote:

Oh my, humins can be so hard to understand! I’m a European Warmblood and I’ve been bred for skill, stamina and strength and one might say we have technical moves. My humin is very techie and likes to talk tech in the barn. I tend to ignore her rants and focus on the task at hand or whatever treat she has in her hand. But then one day, I got confused – she kept saying ‘bitcoin’ to her trainer in hopes of buying another horse (not happy about that part…) but I thought she meant the metal, that I don’t like, that goes in my mouth – called a bit.

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