Craigslist Fools Gold - SCREENSHOT YOUR ADS - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Craigslist Fools Gold - SCREENSHOT YOUR ADS

sdoneil: Apr 27, 2006; The Audacity of Hoop

What do you guys think about his Jaguar S-Type R? Seems like a really good price, and it looks very nice. And if you have ever driven one, you know how incredibly underrated this car is.

http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/car/569538018.html

Just had to post, because I'd kill for this car.

http://boston.craigslist.org/sob/car/561867393.html

# ? Feb 11, 2008 00:59

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 18, 2024 21:30

Huggable Bear King: Jan 12, 2006; H.B.K.

deviant. posted:

91 240sx s13 SR20DET (3500)$$$OBO - $3500

the best part is his email address

ferraif360@aim.com

# ? Feb 11, 2008 02:41

Nitrox: Jul 5, 2002

deviant. posted:

91 240sx s13 SR20DET (3500)$$$OBO - $3500

A buddy of mine used to buy up those unfinished projects by a truckload, part them out and double his money. I've learned a whole lot about reading between the lines when answering those adds. Doesn't run because of some cheap part that owner conveniently didn't bother to install? That means it needs a new engine.

The scary thing is how cheap people are willing to sell their poo poo. My buddy would have gotten that car for less than a grand.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 03:11

Nitrox: Jul 5, 2002

sdoneil posted:

What do you guys think about his Jaguar S-Type R? Seems like a really good price, and it looks very nice. And if you have ever driven one, you know how incredibly underrated this car is.

http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/car/569538018.html

Just had to post, because I'd kill for this car.

http://boston.craigslist.org/sob/car/561867393.html

I don't think you understand the point of this thread.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 03:12

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/569680059.html

****91 MUSTANG GT 5 speed mint condition **b/o*** - $5000

quote:

THIS MUSTANG GT IS IN MINT CONDITION ,IT NEEDS NOTHING ,130K AN ITS BONE SKOCK EXCEPT THE EXHAUST ,,SERIOUR INQUIRIES PLZ ,THE CAR IS AT MY STORAGE HASNT NEVER SEEN WINTER ,I WILL THROW IN 4 NEW TIRES W/THE CAR GOOD ONES ,,,EMAIL OR CALL ME 585-964-3391

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/569484214.html

94 mistu eclipse turbo very fast!!! - $4500

quote:

this car is very clean no rust.. has a new rebuilt motor with a few modds.. new stage 4 clutch, new 18g turbo, new set of stage 2 cams, new agx struts and coil overs, custom molded gauges in dash, 7 inch monitor in dash..... much more for more info on the car please call 315-396-5550 please only call if very intrested thanks or email me at speedy100mphcrazydriver@hotmail.com this car is very fast and has a lot of time in it i really dont want to get ride of it but im looking to get into something else thanks

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/568920174.html

1998 Mustang GT Vert ///LOW MILES/// - $15500

quote:

36,000 Miles, new wheels and tires, needs new windshield otherwise the car is immaculate. Saleen Roadster cover, loaded, automatic, power all, Call after 9am and before 9pm. NO DREAMERS.

585-506-7543 Thanks

The only dreamer in that posting is the guy posting it. :v:

# ? Feb 11, 2008 05:31

Lightbulb Out: Apr 28, 2006; slack jawed yokel

Moruitelda posted:

speedy100mphcrazydriver@hotmail.com

What the hell kind of e-mail address is that?

# ? Feb 11, 2008 05:35

Panty Saluter: Jan 17, 2004; Making learning fun!

TractionControl posted:

What the hell kind of e-mail address is that?

The kind that a Hotmail user would use.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 08:02

7744: Mar 27, 2003; It had no choice. Their defense grid was smashed. We'd won. Taking out Carr then would make no difference. Skynet had to wipe out his entire existence!

Someone should call and ask if he's ever taken the car to 100mph.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 16:08

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

7744 posted:

Someone should call and ask if he's ever taken the car to 100mph.

Send an e-mail for the text based response.

no this car has been miticolusly maintaned and babied i dont want to get ride of it but i want to get into sumthing new

# ? Feb 11, 2008 17:30

Nitrox: Jul 5, 2002

Stock 1990 Miata - $9300

http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/car/558905178.html

quote:

My Name is Jason Ziegler and I am a wholesale broker in Lancaster County. I have 12 years experience in the field. I retail the finest automobiles for Imports of Lancaster County and I am very particular on what I sell and buy for my customers. I can get you any automobile you are looking for.

Contact me for immediate assistance: Jason 717.606.7878

Mazda Miata 1990 MX5 Convertible, Ext Color: Red, Int Color: Tweed cloth, Front Air bags, Mileage: 40,494, 5 speed, Alloy Wheels, Tilt, spoiler, Luggage rack, Red Hardtop, VIN# JM1NA3517L0143814

Jesus gently caress, this is idiotic.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 20:03

Skeeber: Jul 13, 2006

I like this one
http://toronto.craigslist.ca/yrk/car/570524625.html

SRT8 FOR SALE - $60000
"DODGE CHARGER SRT 8 BRAND NEW ,RED EXTERIOR ,BLACK AND RED INTERIOR ,CONTACT MIKE FOR MORE INFO 416 839 0061"

I priced out a brand new SRT-8 on the Dodge Canada website, and with every single option I could possibly find, including taxes, I could only get it up to $48000.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 20:12

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

Skeeber posted:

SRT8 FOR SALE - $60000
I priced out a brand new SRT-8 on the Dodge Canada website, and with every single option I could possibly find, including taxes, I could only get it up to $48000.

Deal with it. It'll be like that for months. I'm guessing until the Camaro comes out.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 20:19

7744: Mar 27, 2003; It had no choice. Their defense grid was smashed. We'd won. Taking out Carr then would make no difference. Skynet had to wipe out his entire existence!

VideoTapir posted:

Deal with it. It'll be like that for months. I'm guessing until the Camaro comes out.

Charger != Challenger

# ? Feb 11, 2008 20:38

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

7744 posted:

Charger != Challenger

Oh...well then, yeah, that is pretty bad.

# ? Feb 11, 2008 20:48

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/570901985.html

1987 MUSTANG GT - $7999

quote:

5SPD,many aftermarket parts,one of a kind,call for Bob for details(585)749-4144

What is it with retarded Mustang owners in my city?

# ? Feb 12, 2008 04:18

DropShadow: Apr 15, 2003

Moruitelda posted:

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/570901985.html

1987 MUSTANG GT - $7999

I swear that same listing has already been posted in this thread.

# ? Feb 12, 2008 04:21

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

DropShadow posted:

I swear that same listing has already been posted in this thread.

It's a new one today, so if it was, it was a repost. There were 2 other idiotic Mustang posts above, though.

I'm looking over M3s now, and there's some funny ones:

http://richmond.craigslist.org/car/563341519.html

92 bmw m3 supercharged, widebody - $14000

quote:

1992 bmw 325is with 95 m3 motor aa supercharged 380hp full zeemax widebody kit and much & much more 40k invested !
call for more details
804-908-2547

antony

# ? Feb 12, 2008 04:39

Simkin: May 18, 2007; "He says he's going to be number one!"

http://victoria.craigslist.ca/mcy/571244178.html

somerandomsquid posted:

im selling for dirt cheap cause i am 2300 away from the truck i want, and i wanna run poo poo over instead of going fast.

It's that special kind of refreshing honesty that you just don't see every day.

# ? Feb 12, 2008 08:16

Shadowhand00: Jan 23, 2006; Golden Bear is ever watching; day by day he prowls, and when he hears the tread of lowly Stanfurd red,from his Lair he fiercely growls.; Toilet Rascal

This isn't super-hilarious or anything, but the guy is selling his 97 M3 with 100k miles on it for a ridiculous price:

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/car/569775566.html

# ? Feb 12, 2008 19:35

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/568585645.html

quote:

1 OF A KIND!! OVER 75K INVESTED!!

2004 CHEVY SILVERADO 2500 HD LT CREW CAB 4X4 DURAMAX 6.6 LLY.

$42,500

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/567483385.html

quote:

1996 Nissan 200sx - SR20det - 12k in mods! 65k mi. - $6700

Over 12k invested into the car (on top of what it is worth).

So that's like 14000 "invested." That's some pretty good return on your investment. I'll call my broker.

quote:

Very well taken care of: 1996 Nissan 200sx - SR20det Bluebird engine (U-13). SUPER CLEAN EXTERIOR AND INTERIOR.

WOW! THAT MEANS I CAN DRIFT WITH IT!

quote:

65k original miles on chasis (less on motor). CLEAN TITLE, NO ACCIDENTS!

When the car is sporting an airbagless aftermarket steering wheel, and it has no other "sporting" interior modifications (you know, like complete removal of the interior), I find it hard to believe it has had no accidents.

quote:

Mods have ALL been installed periodically within the last 3,000 miles! So everything is fresh.

"I hosed up bad and I want out."

quote:

Engine can handle over 20psi with tuning.

Translation: the engine has not been tuned.

quote:

Have an optional touring wing painted the same color as the car available.

Of course you do.

VideoTapir fucked around with this message at 20:08 on Feb 12, 2008

# ? Feb 12, 2008 19:55

glyph: Apr 6, 2006

anyone looking for a cheap veggie conversion project?

http://hudsonvalley.craigslist.org/car/571454537.html

typo?

http://binghamton.craigslist.org/car/571742967.html

glyph fucked around with this message at 20:03 on Feb 12, 2008

# ? Feb 12, 2008 20:01

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

glyph posted:

anyone looking for a cheap veggie conversion project?

http://hudsonvalley.craigslist.org/car/571454537.html

Taking pictures at night makes the car look MYSTERIOUS.

# ? Feb 12, 2008 20:07

Skeeber: Jul 13, 2006

http://toronto.craigslist.ca/tor/car/571756508.html

1996 Camel Fully loaded - $15000

"1996 Camel Up for Grabs!!!!

High milage, but hey it will get you around!!!
Fully loaded 2 humps and one after market hump installed.
Loose front end but will fix, for low cost of 2 virgin wifes, Or pine cones.
This will not last for long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

:haw:

# ? Feb 12, 2008 20:25

Chillbro Baggins: Oct 8, 2004; Bad Angus! Bad!

VideoTapir posted:

Taking pictures at night makes the car look MYSTERIOUS.

The passenger door is probably made of a shipping pallet and some beer cans. Probably more lion-proof than the camel, at least.

Edit: Dallas!

http://dallas.craigslist.org/car/530447583.html
$16000 for a luxo-muscle-yacht that nobody's ever heard of! At least it's got the pre-emissions 429. What kind of gas mileage does that get? Probably requires premium, too.

quote:

1969 Mercury Marauder X100 (all original) show winner. 429 cu in 360 hp automatic. Split bench seat with column shift. Immaculate inside and out. Completely reblt original transmission and new a/c compressor (both about 2000 miles ago). Approx 96,000 original miles.

FoMoCo odometers only go to five digits, so I'd want proof that that shouldn't have a 1 or 2 in front of it. It's a show winner though, so somebody may actually pay that much for it (unless the show it won at is the Whataburger Cruise Nite, which wouldn't surprise me at all).

http://dallas.craigslist.org/car/571794340.html
$5200 in paint and body . . . on an '85 Chevy pickup (asking price $7200), which are only slightly more common than dirt around here. Also keyword spam.

http://dallas.craigslist.org/car/571947780.html
((((((((((((((( :iiam:

))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
'91 salvage-titled Corvette, $10k invested (by the second owner since it was wrecked), selling because 16-year-old-daughter can't afford insurance. Also, a mouse ate the plug wires and an angry Sigtrap apparently wrote the ad title. Only $6500!

http://dallas.craigslist.org/car/555214614.html
Ad title: "2003 Mitsubishi Lancer! I know Price is high, but check it out! - $7600"
At least he's honest.

http://dallas.craigslist.org/car/543406425.html
TODAY ONLY!, eh?
Well
what
are
all
these
for
then?

They're out of order (The "TODAY ONLY" one is neither the first nor the last), but you can arrange them by the slowly-dropping price. Either this guy's really desperate to sell, or doesn't know how Craigslist works. Possibly both; he switches up the copy and pictures every time, at least. I think I may have skipped a few, too.

Chillbro Baggins fucked around with this message at 23:09 on Feb 12, 2008

# ? Feb 12, 2008 22:21

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/571660955.html

WALL OF TEXT posted:

CLASSIC SURFER VAN / SUPER CLEAN / NEVER HAV2 SMOG - $4800
Reply to: sale-571660955@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-12, 9:42AM PST

CHECK THIS OUT ... CLASSIC 1973 1/2 TON DODGE SURFER SLEEPER VAN / NO SMOG THAT'S RIGHT, CALIFORNIA SMOG EXEMPT FOR EVER / PPG BLACK PRIMER SEALER + PPG WHITE BASE COAT + FUSCHIA METAL FLAKE IN CLEAR COAT GREAT SUNLIGHT REFLECTOR + CENTER LINE RIMS + SEMI NEW TIRES + NEW PPG WINDSHIELD AND THICK MOULDING SECURED + REBUILT ORIGINAL POWER 360 CUBIC INCH V 8 + AUTOMATIC TRANS WITH SHIFT KIT + EDELBROCK MANIFOLD AND CARBURATOR + HEDMAN HEADERS + DUAL FLOWMASTERS EXHAUST + 3/4 TON HEAVY DUTY FRONT SPRINGS + NEW BEARINGS, BRAKES AND REBUILT AXLE, FRONT END SUSPENSION BUSHINGS AND BEARINGS + CUSTOM INTERIOR BLACK & RED VELOUR WRAPPED, INSULATED ALL AROUND, CUSTOM UPHOLSTERY, FOAM BED, PILLOWS AND DRAPES, CENTER TAPESTRY / FRONT & REAR BUMPERS RE CHROMED BEAUTIFUL / NEW MIRRORS.....RUNS BITCHIN....GREAT 4 TOWING ....SLEEPING....SURFING... CRUISING OR JUST PLAIN FUN... NEEDS PARKING BRAKE CABLE & CLUSTER LIGHT FUSE, TRANY LOWER GASKET (SMALL LEAK)..... COME AND TEST DRIVE, RUNS REALLY STRONG.....INVESTED OVER $8500.00 HARD CASH ... WAS SELLING FOR $6500.00... REDUCED IT TO $4800 FIRM, IT PRESENTLY HAS A FULL POWER STEREO SYSTEM NOT INCLUDED IN SALE UNLESS YOU WANT IT, IT CONSIST: 2 10" ROCKFORD FOSGATE POWER HX2 DUAL VOICE COIL SUBWOOFER POWERED BY A 1000 RMS POWER ROCKFORD FOSGATE AMP + DIGITAL CAPACITOR, SUB INSTALLED IN 2 CUSTOM MADE AND MATCHING UPHOLSTERED HEAVY BOXES AND 1 ALPINE MEDIA EXPANDER HEAD UNIT COMPLETELY INSTALLED FOR AN ADDITIONAL $1200 READY FOR A 36" FLAT SCREEN DIGITAL TV TO BE MOUNTED ON THE TOP OF BOXES...MUST SELL, RETIRING. CALL TODAY 760-949-9260

# ? Feb 12, 2008 23:12

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

Delivery McGee posted:

http://dallas.craigslist.org/car/543406425.html
TODAY ONLY!, eh?

quote:

Needs paint and interior work. TEXAS truck so minimal rust.

That rust looks more than minimal.

edit:

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/571995749.html

Has it snowed in Vegas this winter, or is this a scam?

Hey this one might actually be pretty good:

1986 Mercury Capri, 2400 bucks.
http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/571971404.html

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/570109420.html

quote:

TAKE OVER MY PAYMENTS!! 04 Ford Explorer - $470

I am a few thousand upside down, as most of us are as soon as we drive off the lot. I am only looking to sell because I recently purchased a new BMW.

So you expect me to buy a car for more than it's worth, then? A 4 year old car?

quote:

It is in perfect condition and is still under warranty until 100k miles (it has almost 40k now)

This CAN be a private transction with no banks.

I'm not sure how the bank to which you're supposed to be making payments would feel about that. Or the insurance company.

quote:

Bad credit ok. We can work out something.

Let's be creative!

And this is is why Las Vegas leads the nation in foreclosures.

BMW diesel anyone?
http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/563947525.html

VideoTapir fucked around with this message at 23:48 on Feb 12, 2008

# ? Feb 12, 2008 23:16

Ziploc: Sep 19, 2006; MX-5

VideoTapir posted:

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/568585645.html

$42,500

I think its because the truck can't actually turn.

# ? Feb 13, 2008 04:22

dukeofurl: Nov 27, 2004; MY ~~GIRLFRIEND~~ ~~UZI~~ BUTT PLUG

Moruitelda posted:

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/570901985.html

1987 MUSTANG GT - $7999

What is it with retarded Mustang owners in my city?

Hate to say it man, but it's not your city. The overwhelming majority of mustang owners I've dealt with are pretty retarded.

# ? Feb 13, 2008 04:31

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

E: Nevermind, apparently not that bad.

Moruitelda fucked around with this message at 05:44 on Feb 13, 2008

# ? Feb 13, 2008 05:15

DeathPool: Jun 23, 2006

Am I doing this right?

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nwi/car/572133492.html

# ? Feb 13, 2008 05:32

Nitrox: Jul 5, 2002

Moruitelda posted:

Here's another from today.

http://rochester.craigslist.org/car/572064578.html

2004 Chrysler Sebring LXi - Excellent - $10000

What's wrong with this add?

DeathPool posted:

Am I doing this right?

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nwi/car/572133492.html

Yes you are. Watch and learn, Moruitelda!

Nitrox fucked around with this message at 05:47 on Feb 13, 2008

# ? Feb 13, 2008 05:36

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

Chrysler Sebrings' value drop like rocks. And they're also some of the most pathetic vehicles ever to grace the road. That said, while my initial reaction was "Ha! That's ridiculous," in looking it up, it seems like that's a fairly regular price. Why anyone would actually spend $10k on a used Sebring is beyond me, though.

# ? Feb 13, 2008 05:44

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

Moruitelda posted:

Chrysler Sebrings' value drop like rocks. And they're also some of the most pathetic vehicles ever to grace the road. That said, while my initial reaction was "Ha! That's ridiculous," in looking it up, it seems like that's a fairly regular price. Why anyone would actually spend $10k on a used Sebring is beyond me, though.

How many Sebring ads can we find where the seller refers to it as a "sports car"?

DeathPool posted:

Am I doing this right?

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nwi/car/572133492.html

Rebuilt in 1968

edit:

http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/car/572389664.html

quote:

1999 nissan altima gxe - $43000
99 nissan altima gxe great condition,a/c ,cruise control , power door ,power window, cd and tape player,5 speed ,super clean in & out ,only 96000 miles , brand new radiator,batery and clutch .i love the car but the wife cant drive stick .the price for the car is $43000 without the rims if you want the rims 18 with cooper tires is $5100.00 i spent $2000 on the rims and tires thas why. only cash.please check the kbb bebore you call me.call me for a text drive .the car is under kbb price for fast sale.call me at 702-510-9821

Misplaced decimal point, twice.

VideoTapir fucked around with this message at 06:22 on Feb 13, 2008

# ? Feb 13, 2008 06:08

OptimusRhyme: Jan 12, 2006; Autobots crafting only the finest limericks.

Sweet, we can go on a text drive! You know, different from the one I already took getting through that listing.

# ? Feb 13, 2008 07:39

nanodroogie: Apr 27, 2006; The Fritos are antiquated.

http://portland.craigslist.org/wsc/car/572377531.html

craigslist posted:

VALENTINE RENTAL FERRARI 355 SPYDER - $700

# ? Feb 13, 2008 09:01

Space Gopher: Jul 31, 2006; BLITHERING IDIOT AND HARDCORE DURIAN APOLOGIST. LET ME TELL YOU WHY THIS SHIT DON'T STINK EVEN THOUGH WE ALL KNOW IT DOES BECAUSE I'M SUPER CULTURED.

DeathPool posted:

Am I doing this right?

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nwi/car/572133492.html

Dude's got other stuff listed off Craigslist, too, including this "project car" priced at a cool thousand bucks:

# ? Feb 13, 2008 09:36

macpod: Jan 29, 2006; What the hell was that about?

http://roanoke.craigslist.org/car/572894520.html

quote:

White 1997 Subaru Outback Legacy. Has heated seats, engine block heater, all power windows and door locks. Just had thermostat and radiator cap replaced. Car is having trouble with overheating issue, 99% sure it's an internal headgasket problem. Car has close to 200,000 miles. Interior and exterior are in very good condition. Email for pictures if interested, or call to come by and look at it.
540-772-3915
540-597-7332

10 year old car with 200K miles and a blown headgasket for only 2000$?! Count me in!

# ? Feb 13, 2008 20:10

VideoTapir: Oct 18, 2005; He'll tire eventually.

Space Gopher posted:

Remember that thread about cinder blocks and how they should go if you're going to use them?

# ? Feb 14, 2008 01:09

frozenphil: Mar 13, 2003; YOU CANNOT MAKE A MISTAKE SO BIG THAT 80 GRIT CAN'T FIX IT!

VideoTapir posted:

Remember that thread about cinder blocks and how they should go if you're going to use them?

In this situation do you worry about the cinder block or frame failing first?

# ? Feb 14, 2008 02:40

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 18, 2024 21:30

16 Tons of Monkeys: Feb 11, 2008; Jerk.

I liked this one.

http://boulder.craigslist.org/car/573133688.html

quote:

1990 Honda Accord dx 4 door 350,000 Car runs great. All maintenance has been completed up to date. Has a new power steering rack, New radiator, New Green Diamond ice tires (https://www.greendiamondtire.com), New OEM Alternator, New OEM timing belt,spark plugs,ignition wires,water pump,all idler bearings and tensioner bearings are new,cam seal,crank seal,oil pump seal, valve cover gasket and spark plug tube seals are new, all V-belts. 5 speed manual transmission, Factory A/C , Power Steering , set of Dunlop summer tires. Windshield is cracked

A 1990 Accord with 350,000 miles on it for $1650? Sweet deal!

# ? Feb 14, 2008 03:15

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Craigslist Fools Gold - SCREENSHOT YOUR ADS

«‹›887 »