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I've worked at a retail clothing store for about a year and a half now. It rhymes with Smurlington Moat Factory. I love everybody I work with but the pay is godawful. Anyways, I've been out for nearly two months due to surgery and returned Saturday with what was probably the busiest I've ever seen the place. One of our registers was broken while the one to the right of it I was looking up a return with a co worker. This enormous lady proceeds to start screaming and pointing at me after looking at the broken register how "YOU'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING. WHY ARE YOU EVEN WORKING?" What a welcome back this was. After telling her it was broken, she started screaming at my manager how "I DON'T THINK YOU'RE HELPING ANYTHING." and then started insulting my co workers how slow they all were. As much as I hate the place and pay, I have a lot of respect for all of my co workers as they are really amazing people. I was biting my tongue SO hard. I got to the point of "gently caress this. The pay sucks. If she says one more thing, it's done." So I finally get the register working (the return was taking a while and she could have easily gone to one of the other lines for the other 6 registers we have) and I tell her calmly that I'll be helping her now. So as I'm holding her clothes with my manager right there, she feels the need to go "I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WORK HERE, BECAUSE YOU SEEM PRETTY loving USELESS." I have NEVER freaked out in any job I have had. I realize keeping cool is the professional thing to do. I guess I just was past that point. I slammed her massive pile of clothes on the counter and blatantly said "Well now you're going to wait pretty loving longer" and then walked away to help another co worker. I didn't even care. I saw the wide mouths of several people around her. I figured I was gone. All I heard was her saying "this is ridiculous." Maybe my manager talked her down or maybe she just realized how much of a total oval office she was being. Here I am a few days later and I still don't know how I have my job.  Also, a lady yesterday I was ringing up was buying a laptop lap desk and asked me if it was only compatible with Macs  Yes lady, it's only compatible with Macs. Also, don't you DARE think of putting a Zune on that coffee table because it will loving EXPLODE. Tim Whatley fucked around with this message at 10:34 on Nov 9, 2010 |
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Nov 9, 2010 09:35
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side_burned posted:To continue with the theme of what the gently caress is corporate thinking, I would like to know who writes the scripts for employee training movies. I remember watching my employee training movie with openmouthed horror. It was pretty much "harass people until they buy something because if they don't buy food or a frappacino then YOU HAVE FAILED AS A BARISTA." Literally every single "scenario" they had was someone going up to the register being like "I.." and the worker going "WOULD YOU LIKE A SCONE LET ME GET YOU A SCONE." It was the awkwardest thing anyone could possibly imagine. There was even a whole segment on how if someone explicitly says they don't want food or a frappacino you have to keep trying to sell it to them. And the actors playing the customers, instead of getting angry at the baristas or being seriously freaked out, are like "hahaha you got me! I really do want a scone lol." It's such a terrible message to send. I upsell as part of my job- I have to, after all- but there is a way to do it without making it harassment. No means no, after all.
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Nov 9, 2010 18:58
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My consolation is that at least our training videos aren't as cheesy as Wendy's training videos of the late 80s. Sure, it's fun to watch now, but probably not when you were actually training at Wendy's.
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Nov 9, 2010 20:30
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Walked into a department store today. It's November the loving 9th, and one of the fifteen billion swing-band renditions of Winter Wonderland was playing over the PA. You retail guys have nothing but my deepest sympathy.
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Nov 10, 2010 00:38
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I believe I have at least until Black Friday before I get to hear the sweet, sweet sounds of christmas carols over our store's speakers. I loving hate christmas.
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Nov 10, 2010 01:40
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side_burned posted:I really have started wonder what kind of research goes in to making in-store policy and procedure at corporate offices. I feel like someone from Mars comes up with this stuff. And as Duck King points out they make transactions tedious and in some cases down rite hostile for the customers and clerks alike. But of course if a customers gets mad it will be clerks fault. My guess is that it comes down to two main factors. One is not the research itself, but rather how it used - most of these corporate-y people don't have a scientific background, and as such they've never learned how to properly read research papers; it doesn't matter how good the research is if you don't correctly understand what it does and does not mean. The other factor is the accumulation of decisions and strategic initiatives and the like across groups. Finance says that credit cards are the only reason the company isn't bankrupt, and Marketing wants to improve customer retention by pushing a rewards program, and Public Relations says raising donations to the Boys and Girls club will distract from the 3rd world child laborers. Each decision on it's own wasn't bad but combined every checkout is a 20 minute interrogation. I've never working a retail corporate office though, so it's just a guess. FizzyJuffoWup posted:Here I am a few days later and I still don't know how I have my job. They don't pay nearly enough to fill their positions exclusively with people who don't snap at customers from time to time.
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Nov 10, 2010 03:39
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I had to watch anti-union propaganda for working at Cumberland Farms. It was ~50 minutes of reaction to some bill that eased the process of unionization. They literally evoked the concept of stranger danger. The managers' was about four hours.
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Nov 10, 2010 03:52
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OMG JC a Bomb! posted:Walked into a department store today. It's November the loving 9th, and one of the fifteen billion swing-band renditions of Winter Wonderland was playing over the PA. Oh God, last month I was feeling so sorry for anyone working at Wal-Mart. They've been updating the Super Wal-Marts in my area, and part of the remodel was the installation of these video screens all over the store to play commercials. Well, during the last month, apparently more than half of them were set to play Old Spice ads, to capitalize on the ad campaign's popularity. Which might not have been horrific, except for the fact that every ad concluded with this: Doo doot doot doot doo doot doot Now, the thing about a whistle is the sound carries like you wouldn't believe, especially in a large open space. So with that many ads playing at once, and the whistle being audible pretty much anywhere in the building, essentially every ten to fifteen seconds you'd hear the Old Spice Whistle echoing through the air. The entire time you were in the store. It drove me batshit just on a 30-minute grocery run; I can't imagine what it would have been like for an eight hour shift. I spent the entire month expecting to hear about a chainsaw murder.
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Nov 10, 2010 04:20
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OMG JC a Bomb! posted:Walked into a department store today. It's November the loving 9th, and one of the fifteen billion swing-band renditions of Winter Wonderland was playing over the PA. The greatest thing I ever heard during Christmas-music-forever season... was when some reggae version of "Little Drummer Boy," came on. I never heard it again sadly... All I remember is some part where it went: "PA RUM PUM PUM PUM MON!"
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Nov 10, 2010 04:22
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Zhentar posted:My guess is that it comes down to two main factors. One is not the research itself, but rather how it used - most of these corporate-y people don't have a scientific background, and as such they've never learned how to properly read research papers; it doesn't matter how good the research is if you don't correctly understand what it does and does not mean. I think another factor, is that they have done the research, and they figure out that Profits from demanding XYZ at checkout > Lost business from people who are so turned off they stop shopping at your store
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Nov 10, 2010 04:30
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So, if the thousand of questions weren't enough, my work just added another couple. Like most places, we offer service plans/extended warranties on certain items. Normally, if your item qualifies (the register will tell me if it is or not) I'll say "hey, would you like a service plan on whatever item for x$?" and if the customer has any questions, I'll answer them. But hey, it's easy enough, and only one question. No problem, right? Well now we have to ask, and I'm quoting here, "Hey, this item you're buying qualifies for our service plan. [hand the customer the brochure] One think I like about our service plan is [make something up*]! And it only costs x$! Would you like me to add this to your transaction?" Even better, is the way I ask was cited in the module we learned all this from as being specifically wrong. So now if I'm not a smiley retard who creams her jeans over the service plan, it's possible for me to get written up. Awesome. *They actually say to make something up if nothing about the service plan "excites" you. kazmeyer posted:Old Spice commercials I actually kinda like those commercials in my store. Most of the time I'm too busy to really notice it (or I'm apparently really good at unconsciously blocking it out), but when I hear that Old Spice jingle I always think of those awesome new Old Spice commercials, and it makes me smile. I don't really notice any of the other jingles that play on those monitors. Soysaucebeast fucked around with this message at 04:41 on Nov 10, 2010 |
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Nov 10, 2010 04:37
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Soy Sauce Beast posted:*They actually say to make something up if nothing about the service plan "excites" you. "I, personally, like how it inflates the price of the item I'm purchasing. Makes me sound richer when I tell my friends I paid 5 hundred dollars for my microwave, and it gives me that extra feeling of security knowing my investment is covered."
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Nov 10, 2010 04:46
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Dodgeball posted:"I, personally, like how it inflates the price of the item I'm purchasing. Makes me sound richer when I tell my friends I paid 5 hundred dollars for my microwave, and it gives me that extra feeling of security knowing my investment is covered." On my last day of work I wanted to sell the store credit card by pointing out its great features, such as increasing our shareholders' dividends.
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Nov 10, 2010 04:51
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manguero posted:On my last day of work I wanted to sell the store credit card by pointing out its great features, such as increasing our shareholders' dividends. "I, personally, LOVE that the store credit card is 100% sterile, and is incapable of giving you AIDS. You will never get AIDS from our credit card. Would you like to fill out the application?"
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Nov 10, 2010 04:55
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OMG JC a Bomb! posted:Walked into a department store today. It's November the loving 9th, and one of the fifteen billion swing-band renditions of Winter Wonderland was playing over the PA. As much as I hate that my store does not play any music in it, I am so grateful that I do not have to hear any christmas music either. However, those drat TVs that played some part of some Justin Bieber song made me want to tear the walls down.
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Nov 10, 2010 04:56
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Dodgeball posted:"I, personally, LOVE that the store credit card is 100% sterile, and is incapable of giving you AIDS. You will never get AIDS from our credit card. Would you like to fill out the application?" "One of MY favorite things about the card is that each enrollment contributes to my managers' quarterly bonuses. Oh, no ma'am, I don't get any commission."
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Nov 10, 2010 05:07
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manguero posted:"One of MY favorite things about the card is that each enrollment contributes to my managers' quarterly bonuses. Oh, no ma'am, I don't get any commission." "Would you like a service plan for your credit card? It's very cost effective: It's costs just pennies a day... Several hundred..."
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Nov 10, 2010 05:08
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Complaint sent to Target today after what should have been a half minute transaction was delayed almost ten minutes by two separate events. I scan the check out lines as I approach store front and spot a woman buying a single item. Figuring she'll be quick I hop behind her in line. When she scans the one item the cashier asked the woman if she would like to sign up for a store credit card to receive 10% of her purchase today (a single bottle of shampoo). Woman says sure and then proceeds to start on the application. Next she needs to give a voided check to verify bank information and the cashier starts to scan that. I look at cashier and says she cannot help me because she is in the middle of this transaction. In disgust I walk over to the other cashier who is almost done ringing up a guy. He then gives her a coupon and she can't figure out why the customer's $5 off $50 purchase coupon won't work on the $52 total. She pages a manager who comes over and tries to unsuccessfully scan the drat thing. Finally I suggest that maybe it requires $50 pre-tax and it's only over $50 because of tax. They sort of stare at my and read the coupon and sure enough it confirms my suggestion. The cashier then informs the customer they need to get something else if they want the coupon and of course he starts to hem and haw if he should or not. At this point at I am wits end, drop the one thing I was planning to buy and walk out of the store. I don't know how you guys deal with this stuff.
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Nov 10, 2010 06:33
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alreadybeen posted:I don't know how you guys deal with this stuff. Alcohol helps. Good on you for complaining though. Maybe if enough people let the fuckers know how bad it is they'll stop. My company's just introduced a $33 charge for doing a loving SIM replacement if you've lost your prepaid phone. For something that can take as little as twenty seconds. I don't know what the gently caress.
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Nov 10, 2010 08:00
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BeardedFerret posted:Alcohol helps. $40 SIM cards have been standard in Canada forever. 
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Nov 10, 2010 08:50
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BeardedFerret posted:Maybe if enough people let the fuckers know how bad it is they'll stop. I'm going to start writing firm but polite letters. Corporate likes to tell consumers that it's all the retail worker's fault, but everyone who ever worked retail knows that is bullshit. If I get any interesting responses, I'll post them here 
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Nov 10, 2010 17:36
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Console Parade posted:I'm going to start writing firm but polite letters. Corporate likes to tell consumers that it's all the retail worker's fault, but everyone who ever worked retail knows that is bullshit. Dear Console Parade: [Generic Form Letter] But thanks for trying to stick up for us.
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Nov 10, 2010 18:11
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OMG JC a Bomb! posted:Walked into a department store today. It's November the loving 9th, and one of the fifteen billion swing-band renditions of Winter Wonderland was playing over the PA. My store started playing Christmas music on the 1st November. Yeah, BEFORE Bonfire Night. It's the most wonderful time of the yearrrrrrrr.... ''No. No it is not.''
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Nov 10, 2010 18:23
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Dell_Zincht posted:My store started playing Christmas music on the 1st November. Yeah, BEFORE Bonfire Night. Meanwhile, my store is playing Pat Boone's "In a Metal Mood." It's quite possibly the greatest thing ever.
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Nov 10, 2010 18:29
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Yesterday I was helping a redneck and his son check out some laptops. In the middle of describing the differences between Macs and PCs he shoots his arm across my body to point far off and shouts "Hot drat!". I look over and its a lady in a scandalously short red dress with what appears to be rear end implants that he is pointing at. The redneck, who was trying to decide between a couple different $1700 laptops, basically starts drooling and can't think anymore and walks off.
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Nov 10, 2010 19:50
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So today I'm cleaning up the camera table and I am asked to help a customer. He wanted to look at SLRs. Normally I like talking about SLRs because I am saving up for one myself and I like enthusiatic conversations with camera nerds. It is quite often a mutually beneficially discussion. Not so today. The man was just ... boring. There are some people who are just uninteresting. Who say nothing of value. Who start sentences and do not finish them. Who you cannot connect with on any level and after about five minutes your brain starts whispering to you that you should leave RIGHT NOW because this is so awkward and you are falling asleep. He came back three times that day. He bought a camera in the end but I swear talking to him was like chewing on cardboard. Also there was a lady who asked me where home telephones were. They were right behind her. I told her so. She turned around 90 degrees and continued bimbling down the aisle, around the aisle, up the side of the shop, back to me, and proceeds to tell me she cannot find the phones.
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Nov 10, 2010 20:26
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It should go without saying, but good God are people stupid. This morning was pretty cold, but as long as you had a coat on it was fine. A woman came in around noon wearing a sleeveless dress with no socks and bellowed "IT'S COLD OUTSIDE!" so everyone in the store could hear as soon as she walked through the door. She then asked me if the movie Hereafter was based on a book. I get this a lot, so I went to IMDB. They say right on the page "Is Hereafter based on a book? No." She said it was based on a true story; right beneath the previous question, IMDB helpfully tells me that it is NOT based on a true story, but incorporates real-life events into the story. I showed her these and she said "oh no, no, no, it's real! They had it right in bold print before the movie that it's based on a true story! It's based on the tsunamis in Asia! The woman in the movie may have been a man in real life, but she was a reporter who wrote a book about being dead and I want that book." I need out of this job before Christmas, I can't do it anymore. 
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Nov 11, 2010 02:08
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Soy Sauce Beast posted:So, if the thousand of questions weren't enough, my work just added another couple. Like most places, we offer service plans/extended warranties on certain items. Normally, if your item qualifies (the register will tell me if it is or not) I'll say "hey, would you like a service plan on whatever item for x$?" and if the customer has any questions, I'll answer them. But hey, it's easy enough, and only one question. No problem, right? I did the same CBL the other day. Mine was especially excruciating because the video kept skipping around, or skipping back to certain points. During one, I watched that woman hand the customer a service plan brochure about 12 times before it just skipped to the end of the video and asked me questions. As far as the TV screens go, the only one in my store that's audible at any respectable distance is in the "As Seen On TV" section, so every 20 seconds or so there's a shrill pocket-size dog barking. Plenty of customers have complained about it already but I guess we'll have to wait for another mod to take its place before it ends. E.T. NO HOMO fucked around with this message at 05:46 on Nov 11, 2010 |
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Nov 11, 2010 05:43
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gently caress union voted to strike if they don't come to a resolution by monday 
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Nov 11, 2010 20:52
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gently caress people who can't get off their cellphones for 5 minutes. gently caress them in their wrinkled assholes. I had a woman back into someone else in the drive-through line because she wasn't paying attention to anything other than her drat cellphone. She forgot her change and backed up to get back to the window, but the person behind her had already advanced a bit. She backed up too fast, and hit the person in back. No damage that I could see, but get off the phone before reversing, for gently caress's sake. Then there was the other woman who sat at the order box for a full 2 minutes talking on her phone. The people behind her were honking, the person taking orders was telling her to hurry up, and then she gets all indignant. gently caress them all.
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Nov 11, 2010 21:59
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Well I've got enough poo poo I can sell (I'm a game collector) to get me through a strike while I look for a new job. Wish the strike vote was a month later, I was just about to get out of this job but didn't want to leave until I had a new one.
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Nov 12, 2010 00:18
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So some anonymous guy had a small bouquet of roses from 1800flowers delivered to our store today for a cashier. The greeting card was completely blank and she has no idea who it could be, but whoever it was knew her full name and work schedule. Seems like there might be another goon working there.
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Nov 12, 2010 01:41
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A little background on where I work: I'm currently employed at Mike's Express Carwash, a very successful (and if the propaganda is to be believed the most successful nationwide) carwash chain in Indiana and western Ohio. The company itself takes great pride in the professionalism of its employees (we wear shirts and ties to work at a carwash), their courtesy towards customers, and in general the outward appearance of the facilities and employees. The prices are higher, sure- anywhere from $8.00 for the Express wash to $17.00 for the Works + Tire Shine- but the quality is, and this is mostly unbiased, unmatched by anywhere else I've ever seen. Consequently, we are busy constantly, and our facility is big enough to get around 40 to 50 cars on the lot and in line without a problem. When you pull up, a cashier will handle the transaction and write a number and any special restrictions (for example, writing a symbol to tell the loader to turn off the blowers for a convertible) on your windshield with a piece of soap. You then pull up to the loader, who will direct you onto a conveyor. He will then loudly scream at you to put your car into neutral and spray you off with a pressure washer. Now,because it was Veteran's Day, we were offering free washes to Veterans. This is where the *actual* story begins- as I'm sure you can imagine, a large number of veterans are elderly and not quite as observant as they used to be. We're sending cars through practically bumper to bumper, and there were eleven collisions in the tunnel before the day is halfway over. Most of the people were responsible and came back around to exchange insurance information, but two younger pricks decided that they were going to run. The law says, then, that we pay for the damage. The damage comes out of my loving bonus check. loving assholes. edit: I came in here meaning to post one thing and ended up posting a slightly less infuriating story instead. Anyway, the actual actual story is about a lady driving a 2007-ish Jaguar. She seemed harmless at first, but then she went on to whine and complain that the last time she came through everything wasn't perfect; I proceeded to inform her of our rewash policy (if anything isn't perfect we'll wash it until it is, all on us) and sent her on her way. Lo and behold, she came back (rightfully so, there was dirt on her rocker panels) and demanded a rewash, and started complaining that she paid $15.00 for a Works wash and how she was pissed that her car wasn't clean and that she was going to be late now. All this, mind you, while I rang her up for a rewash that was entirely free of charge to her in a carwash where the entire process takes on the low side of a minute and thirty seconds. Your time is not more valuable than mine, lady, and I do not exist solely to serve you and you alone- I cannot devote 5 minutes to your car and ignore the other 15 in line. InstantInfidel fucked around with this message at 02:06 on Nov 12, 2010 |
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Nov 12, 2010 01:55
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SpartanIV posted:So some anonymous guy had a small bouquet of roses from 1800flowers delivered to our store today for a cashier. The greeting card was completely blank and she has no idea who it could be, but whoever it was knew her full name and work schedule. Or she has a stalker. I'd be kinda freaked out if I randomly got a bouquet.
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Nov 12, 2010 02:19
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SpartanIV posted:So some anonymous guy had a small bouquet of roses from 1800flowers delivered to our store today for a cashier. The greeting card was completely blank and she has no idea who it could be, but whoever it was knew her full name and work schedule. Soy Sauce Beast posted:Or she has a stalker. Did she like them?  Was she wearing that red shirt I like?
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Nov 12, 2010 02:28
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Incoherent Moron posted:gently caress people who can't get off their cellphones for 5 minutes. gently caress them in their wrinkled assholes. I had a woman back into someone else in the drive-through line because she wasn't paying attention to anything other than her drat cellphone. She forgot her change and backed up to get back to the window, but the person behind her had already advanced a bit. She backed up too fast, and hit the person in back. No damage that I could see, but get off the phone before reversing, for gently caress's sake. Then there was the other woman who sat at the order box for a full 2 minutes talking on her phone. The people behind her were honking, the person taking orders was telling her to hurry up, and then she gets all indignant. gently caress them all. I had a woman talk on her phone the entire way through a transaction, then when she was done she just walked away from my till, leaving her items bagged on the counter. She was waiting for her friend to finish shopping so I just assumed she was being a lazy bitch and pushed her items to the side and rang up the rest of the customers in line. She and her friend met up and she just....walked out. Forgetting all her stuff, and talking on her phone the entire time. She came back for her stuff while I was on lunch, but..she still ended up leaving some behind. That she never came back for. My fellow cashiers report that she was on her phone when she came back for her items.
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Nov 12, 2010 02:32
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Soy Sauce Beast posted:Or she has a stalker. quote:Was she wearing that red shirt I like? 
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Nov 12, 2010 03:04
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SpartanIV posted:Ya she seemed happy to get it but everyone else that I talked to about it thought it was super creepy. Dude, you work at Target. That was an easy one.
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Nov 12, 2010 03:29
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InstantInfidel posted:We're sending cars through practically bumper to bumper, and there were eleven collisions in the tunnel before the day is halfway over. Most of the people were responsible and came back around to exchange insurance information, but two younger pricks decided that they were going to run. The law says, then, that we pay for the damage. The damage comes out of my loving bonus check. Do you not have security cameras that would grab their plate number? edit: Also, the law is kind of weird. It's not like a business has to pay for damage if there's a hit and run in their parking lot. (Right? )
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Nov 12, 2010 03:57
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less than three posted:Do you not have security cameras that would grab their plate number? See, that's what I though, but apparently even if we get their plates there's really not a lot we can do, especially if we don't get the accident on tape too, because then it's just circumstantial. The law regarding accidents during business hours is really confusing. edit: and yes, the business does have to pay (I think), but I'm sure you can get insurance for that sort of thing.
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Nov 12, 2010 04:14
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