|
Long time lurker, but finally transferring from the Gettin' Knocked Up thread to this one! I'm just about 5 weeks along, so not super far in. A question though: Did anyone have trouble in the beginning feeling detached from their pregnancy? Don't get me wrong, I'm psyched about it, but I just don't feel like its real and the 7 tests I've taken and the vast array of symptoms should be all I need to get me by. It just feels like I'm in someone else's life and I'll wake up in my old life any second now.
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 05:25
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 16:31 |
|
|
Bahunter22 posted:Long time lurker, but finally transferring from the Gettin' Knocked Up thread to this one! I'm just about 5 weeks along, so not super far in. I felt this way for a while, past the first ultrasound, and finally kinda GOT IT when the baby finally started moving around more. I don't think it's unnatural to feel detached.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 05:37
|
|
|
vanessa posted:Any advice on how to bring it up while managing to keep her scenes to a minimum? I am very sorry for your loss. As for breaking the news, is there any way to get her out of the office into a more casual or private situation? Maybe offer to buy her lunch tomorrow and take her somewhere neutral to discuss your situation with her.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 05:57
|
|
|
I'm sending a care package down to a friend who is due this week. She's in the US, I'm in Canada. I've already got a bunch of her favourite treats in there. Can you folks think of anything nice that a brand-new (first time) mom would want to find in a care-package? I'm not much of a kid person, so everything I've included so far has been stuff that I know the mom likes as a treat. Babies baffle me.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 07:58
|
|
|
I say stick with things for her. Everyone else will be getting stuff for the baby, and it's nice to have something just for you when you're an insane first time mom working off of little to no sleep and little to no experience with a newborn.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 10:11
|
|
|
Bahunter22 posted:A question though: Did anyone have trouble in the beginning feeling detached from their pregnancy? Don't get me wrong, I'm psyched about it, but I just don't feel like its real and the 7 tests I've taken and the vast array of symptoms should be all I need to get me by. It just feels like I'm in someone else's life and I'll wake up in my old life any second now. Congrats, I know you've been trying for awhile. I have been feeling constant kicking for about 2.5 weeks now, but I still feel pretty detached. I don't know if that will ever change until I have a screaming, kicking, hungry child to care for.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 13:48
|
|
|
Pixelante posted:I'm sending a care package down to a friend who is due this week. She's in the US, I'm in Canada. I've already got a bunch of her favourite treats in there. Can you folks think of anything nice that a brand-new (first time) mom would want to find in a care-package? I'm not much of a kid person, so everything I've included so far has been stuff that I know the mom likes as a treat. Babies baffle me. Send her a gift certificate for a visit from a maid service! If there was one thing that I would have enjoyed post-baby, a clean house is top of the list. Even if she waits weeks or months, when she uses it she'll love her house, and you for making it happen.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 15:03
|
|
|
Bahunter, glad to see you here! Yeah, I'm about 12 1/2 weeks now and it's still not really...real. When I think, "Oh, in November we'll have a little baby of our own and we'll be parents" it doesn't feel like I'm thinking about ME at all. Also, before my ultrasound at nine weeks, I was certain I was just hallucinating the two pink lines on my pregnancy test and would take another test at least once a week and show it to my husband to make sure I wasn't just making the whole thing up. Pata Pata Pata Pon fucked around with this message at 16:04 on May 18, 2011 |
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 15:58
|
|
|
Aericina posted:Congrats, I know you've been trying for awhile. For me, it wasn't "real" until I was at home with my new baby. And then there was no "OH, so THIS IS IT" moment; it was more of a gradual change into a new life over the whole time, from pregnancy to delivery, so that feeling of detachment just faded away without me really realizing it. I think this is common, so if you or anyone else never has that pristine movie-like baby moment, don't feel weird 
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 16:54
|
|
|
vanessa posted:Any advice on how to bring it up while managing to keep her scenes to a minimum? Just tell her how you feel about it. Tell her that you would appreciate it if she would respect your wishes about your loss and keep things low key. If she starts getting carried away, just tell her she's actually making it WORSE for you. This is your loss, your grief, not hers.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 18:57
|
|
|
*sigh* This morning, we had a detailed ultrasound, and the doctor was finally able to get a good view of the baby's heart. Every time, she's moving around so much that quick glimpses is all that has been possible. Unfortunately, they discovered what is believed to be a pretty major congenital heart defect, called Tetralogy of Fallot. Here's a link so you don't have to go Google: http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/dci/Diseases/tof/tof_what.html I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to feel. I get the sense that ultimately, she'll end up ok, but getting her to that point is going to be pretty horrible. I don't know. I can't even find the words to type about what I'm feeling. Helpless? Afraid? Sad? All of these at once, plus some weird new emotion I can't describe, I guess. I have an appointment at Children's Hospital in Boston on Friday morning for a fetal heart echo to confirm the ultrasound results, and an appointment with a pediatric cardiologist. I keep wanting to hope that the ultrasound was wrong, and I guess that's a possibility, but I think they probably wouldn't have scheduled me an appointment with a cardiologist if they weren't pretty sure. Babies should be perfect. It should be a rule.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 19:31
|
|
|
I'm sorry to hear that, bellybutton...I'm hoping for the best for you. I've had a somewhat less rough day. Went for my first prenatal appointment. They rooted around in me with the transvaginal ultrasound wand for like 10 minutes before calling the doctor back in to confirm that they didn't really see anything. The cyst on the ovary where the egg was produced was there, which they said was a good sign, but they couldn't really see anything in the uterus. So they took about a gallon of blood and pee and I have to go back Friday to see if my hCG levels are increasing. I just can't believe I could be that early. The last time I should have been fertile was four weeks ago, but I'd already missed one period before that. WTF are you doing, body. 
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 20:24
|
|
|
"bellybutton" posted:*sigh* I'm really really sorry to hear about this. My daughter was born in June with Transposition of the Great Arteries, and two open heart surgeries, 2 angioplasties, and 3 other catheter procedures later, we're almost at a year. I'm not going to lie, it's extremely difficult. I've heard the hospital in Boston is great, and from that link it seems that it's a treatable defect. I'm glad you know before birth, I think I would have preferred knowing. There's so much to say I'm not sure where to begin. Are you a member of the Facebook group? If not, you should join it, and if so, my name is Noelle. I'd love to talk to you if you need anything at all. I'd be writing a book here probably if I didn't just tell you to feel free to contact me! I hope to talk to you soon.
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 20:40
|
|
|
qentiox posted:Stuffs I just this second joined. Expect a PM! Thanks so much!
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 21:53
|
|
|
Chicken McNobody posted:I'm sorry to hear that, bellybutton...I'm hoping for the best for you. It's completely possible you just missed a period that first month, and really did JUST get pregnant a couple of weeks ago. This site says you can't see a gestational sac until about 4 weeks 3 days, and perhaps not even until you're over 5 weeks along, so maybe you are just earlier along than you feel you should be. Good luck!
|
|
#
?
May 18, 2011 23:41
|
|
|
Bahunter22 posted:Long time lurker, but finally transferring from the Gettin' Knocked Up thread to this one! I'm just about 5 weeks along, so not super far in. Congratulations! I was pretty detached, to a greater or lesser extent, for pretty much the duration of both of my pregnancies. That's not to say I didn't care; I cared a lot! But even feeling them, and seeing them on ultrasound, I never had an "ah-ha, that's my baby" moment. More like, "huh, well look at that!" For the first several weeks, yeah, it was surreal for sure. But even after that, to me, it was like the pregnancy and the subsequent child were two unrelated events. Like, my baby didn't have anything to do with the previous nine months of stuff, and wasn't the same baby that was kicking inside me the whole time. I know that's weird...I just never bonded to the pregnancies themselves. Also, when they were born, I didn't have an instant, as seen on TV, bonding moment--and with my first one, I really thought I would/should and it made me doubt myself that I didn't. It took several days with my first, and a couple days even with my second; except that time, I didn't feel abnormal like before. Again, it's not that I didn't care--I wanted to hold, touch, feed, care for them immediately, but I didn't instantly love them the way I grew to love them. Now, I love them so much sometimes it feels like my heart will physically burst.  All I'm saying is, I don't think there's any set "normal" thing to feel. Certainly don't let anyone tell you there is. It's a serious life changer, so it's no wonder that we feel a whole spectrum of things at different times!
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2011 21:58
|
|
|
This was back a page, but all the Bradley classes are full until November. Apparently, demand is higher than the number of instructors. I'll keep asking around, see what I can find. Also, whoever recommended Old Navy for maternity clothes is awesome! Cheap (sometimes included in those 20/30% off sales they're always having), comfortable, and flattering. I feel like I hit the lottery. Thanks too to whoever said not to go overboard on maternity stuff. I'm six months and just barely stopped wearing regular (non-tee) shirts. This thread saved me a lot of money.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 01:12
|
|
|
Brennanite posted:This was back a page, but all the Bradley classes are full until November. Apparently, demand is higher than the number of instructors. I'll keep asking around, see what I can find. Look for something called "Brio" classes. They're a spin-off of Bradley, but a little less strict, like they don't have to be exactly 12 classes long, etc. I don't know much more about them, but I know they exist!
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 01:24
|
|
|
Hi, you may remember me as the father of such wonderful children as Julian, and, um, not much else. Anyhow, Wafer Lady is pregnant again, and this time we're expecting a girl. Cool, I think. We both like the name Maya for a girl (Maya Charlotte, actually). Wafer Lady has three concerns: There's a neighbor girl named Maia, and she's concerned the neighbors will be offended that we poached the name, even if it's spelled different. Never mind that she would be cool with another boy in the hood being named "Julien." Second, their last name is similar to ours. I'm German, they're Swedish. German and Swedish sharing many linguistic traits, it's as if I'm a "Stair" and they're "Astair." The difference is a single letter. So she's concerned that people will confuse Maya Stair with Maia Astair. Even though Maia Astair will be 4 years older than Maya Stair. Third, people know how "Maya" is pronounced, right? I mean, I think it's obvious, but the question has been asked and now must be answered. We also like Fiona, and that's about all that's in common with our current lists. That and the middle name will be Charlotte (my mother). So, Fiona, or Maya, or whatever she turns out to be, will be born in Mid September. The Ultrasonographer put my wife's due date on September 29, but considering Julian was 2 weeks early, we should expect her sometime in the middle of September, right?
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 03:56
|
|
|
Different babies gestate at different rates, so you can't really expect the same two weeks early as your first child. But congratulations! I like both names and am of no help when it comes to that. Thankfully we didn't know anyone named Cecilia when we picked that name. 
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 03:59
|
|
|
I adore the name Fiona! Our last name begins with F, so it was out from the start (not that we have a girl anyway, as it turned out).
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 13:42
|
|
|
Thanks! Its really a relief to know that I'm not the only one that feels/or has felt this way.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 13:44
|
|
|
I love the name Fiona! It's on my shortlist for girls names. I'm with your wife on the issue of picking such a similar name to the neighbors' child. If you plan on moving in the next year or two, then it's probably no big deal; if you're good friends with these neighbors or planning to stick around in your house for a long time, I'm guessing neighborly relations will be better if you go with another first name. I really love the name 'Olivia', but my husband's coworker/friend (one of the only ones with a kid) had a 'Livia' last year, so I feel like if I used it it would be weird for us, them, and probably our mutual friends. Also - whole milk tastes SO freaking good today. WOW.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 15:43
|
|
|
A couple of days ago, I posted about being told my little fetus likely had a heart condition. This morning, we had our appointment at Children's Hospital in the fetal medicine department for an echocardiogram. After, the cardiologist came in and went over each part of her heart with us. The bottom line? The baby is FINE. There is nothing wrong with her heart. He has no idea what it was that caused someone to get all worked out on the ultrasound, but at the end of the day, her little heart is perfect. I got a TON of PMs and introduced to some pretty amazing folks in the Facebook group over the last couple of days. Thank you all SO much for your support and encouraging words. It made a difference.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 18:35
|
|
|
bellybutton posted:A couple of days ago, I posted about being told my little fetus likely had a heart condition. So glad to hear this. I can't imagine the relief you must be feeling.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 18:40
|
|
|
Not sure if I ever introduced myself here and thought it was about time if I hadn't yet. I'm just about 18wks prego and we found out yesterday that we are having a boy. I'm due Oct 24th and this is our first. You may see my husband, Habibi, on here as well. I really appreciate all of the shared info here so far, especially about breastfeeding, sleep patterns, and general "now what do we do?" postnatal stuff.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2011 22:00
|
|
|
bellybutton posted:A couple of days ago, I posted about being told my little fetus likely had a heart condition. Holy poo poo I know you are relieved. Congratulations! I got good news from the doctor today too--my hCG levels are increasing properly, and apparently I'm only about 5 weeks pregnant.  Waaaaaay earlier than I thought, but hey, there's something in there. Yay!
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 03:27
|
|
|
MoCookies posted:I love the name Fiona! It's on my shortlist for girls names. I'm with your wife on the issue of picking such a similar name to the neighbors' child. If you plan on moving in the next year or two, then it's probably no big deal; if you're good friends with these neighbors or planning to stick around in your house for a long time, I'm guessing neighborly relations will be better if you go with another first name. I really love the name 'Olivia', but my husband's coworker/friend (one of the only ones with a kid) had a 'Livia' last year, so I feel like if I used it it would be weird for us, them, and probably our mutual friends. See, this is somewhat contrary to what other people have told me. Generally speaking, they tell us to do what we want and forget it. Also, we're casual acquaintances of theirs, not close friends or anything like that. Though, I suppose that if someone is close enough to consider them family, that it would be weird on a similar level. Would it help to talk to the people and see what they think?
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 03:57
|
|
|
^^ Honestly it's up to you. I love the name Maya, in fact one of my daughters is Mya. If you want to talk it over with the neighbors go for it. If not It's your decision. If the other Maya/ Maia was family or a close friend, I'd lean toward choosing another name for that reason. But, they are not close, so name her whatever you think will fit. I had a girl living next to me for a while with the exact same first name. We became good friends and it was just sort of a joke. And, we've come to the grand truth, that no matter how phonetically a name is spelled-someone will say it wrong. We spelled Mya for that reason. My-a. People still say Mee-a. So don't worry about that too much.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 04:26
|
|
|
Name your kid whatever you want to. If you like the name, use it! I have a very close friend with a 10 year old named Julianne, and she goes by Julie. We love the name Julie, and want to name our impending daughter that, so I asked her if she minded and she doesn't. She even told the 10 year old we were naming our baby after her so she'd feel special. I don't mind that. If you're close to your neighbors, you should probably ask if they mind. I can't imagine someone telling you they care what you name your baby.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 10:48
|
|
|
Missa posted:We spelled Mya for that reason. My-a. People still say Mee-a. So don't worry about that too much. Our daughter is Maya Eleanor. She gets Mia quite a bit. That said, I think it's a beautiful name and you should use it if you love it.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 13:36
|
|
|
Any ideas for dealing with snoring caused by pregnancy? My wife is 8 months pregnant and snoring incredibly loud so much so that its both waking me up and keeping me awake. We have the breathing strips but they only help a little. She's already having issues sleeping on her side as is. I realize the easy answer would be "sleep on the couch" but our couch is very narrow and I'm a big guy so that won't work.
Uziel fucked around with this message at 14:14 on May 21, 2011 |
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 14:05
|
|
|
Chicken and bellybutton: WOOOO~ Congrats to both of you! Wafer: If they were friends or family, I'd worry about using the name. But they're just neighbors, so nuts to them. It could be worse. My sister confided to a friend of hers that she wanted to name her future daughter Serena Rae. Take a wild guess what name her friend used for her daughter when she became pregnant? Apparently this was a deal-breaker as they are no longer friends. Uziel: the only things that helped me with my snoring were sleeping on my side or sleeping elevated, but my snoring wasn't as bad as you describe.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 18:01
|
|
|
Uziel posted:Any ideas for dealing with snoring caused by pregnancy? My wife is 8 months pregnant and snoring incredibly loud so much so that its both waking me up and keeping me awake. We have the breathing strips but they only help a little. She's already having issues sleeping on her side as is. I realize the easy answer would be "sleep on the couch" but our couch is very narrow and I'm a big guy so that won't work. Is she actually congested? She might want to talk to her doctor if so; there may be something she can take. Whether it is or isn't, elevating her upper body like foxatee said might help.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 20:13
|
|
|
Uziel: Invest in some good ear plugs. I can sometimes control it when my husband wakes me up to roll over, and am usually playing roll over games all night.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 21:42
|
|
|
Janelle posted:Uziel: Invest in some good ear plugs. I can sometimes control it when my husband wakes me up to roll over, and am usually playing roll over games all night. I did grab some ear plugs from Walgreens so I'll see if that helps.
|
|
#
?
May 21, 2011 22:08
|
|
|
So, our six-week old baby hasn't pooped in the last two days. He's being breastfed, with formula when he's still hungry. Should we be concerned about this?
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2011 17:31
|
|
|
Iron Squid posted:So, our six-week old baby hasn't pooped in the last two days. He's being breastfed, with formula when he's still hungry. Should we be concerned about this? If baby is making wet diapers like normal then you shouldn't be concerned. I believe breastfed babies can go up to 10 days without pooping and still be considered normal. At least, that is what our pediatrician has told us. I'm guessing the formula supplements won't affect it too much. My baby has gone up to 7 days without pooping but boy does she make up for it when she does. It can be worrisome because it feels like their filling up and something should be coming out but babies are pretty efficient with their food. But if your baby isn't making enough wet diapers or you are still unsure, call your doctor. They get questions like this all the time.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2011 18:04
|
|
|
Revenant77 posted:If baby is making wet diapers like normal then you shouldn't be concerned. I believe breastfed babies can go up to 10 days without pooping and still be considered normal. At least, that is what our pediatrician has told us. I'm guessing the formula supplements won't affect it too much. My baby has gone up to 7 days without pooping but boy does she make up for it when she does. By "wet diapers" you mean urine? He's still peeing and he doesn't seem to be excessively upset about anything so I guess he's okay.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2011 18:32
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 25, 2024 16:31 |
|
|
Yeah, our little one would go every 3-10 days around that age but still was urinating like normal. She would get uncomfortable around when she was going to blow though, saving it up for a proper poop-splosion. It's very normal for breastfed babies so don't worry!
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2011 21:06
|
|
