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Supreme Allah posted:Steinbrenner would not care, he doesn't even want doors on the stalls in Yankee Stadium. INT - Yankee Stadium Employee Bathroom. [George enters into Employee Bathroom whistling, Mr Steinbrenner is using a stall with an open door, George recoils in shock.] George: Augh! Oh geez, I am so sorry sir! Mr Steinbrenner: No problem George, actually I've been meaning to discuss something with you, you got a minute? George: Uh sir... you're uh, you're heh.... on the toilet. Mr Steinbrenner: Well of course George. I like meeting here, lets me talk Yankee to Yankee, catch people with their pants down, so to speak. Plus I don't like my office lately. The new cleaner the janitor uses is making me sneeze, plus I think he changes the air conditioner setting when I'm not around. George: Can I at least close the door? Mr Steinbrenner: No can do, Georgey Boy. Gotta look up at a man's face when you're talking business George, shows respect and confidence. George: Oh, I'm looking up sir... Mr Steinbrenner: Did you know that FDR used to meet with his Chiefs of Staff while on the toilet? What a guy. Although I think it was because he was in that wheelchair, so he couldn't reach the door handle and he needed them to get him out... George: [looking around] Sir... where have all the stall doors gone? Mr Steinbrenner: That's what I wanted to talk to you about. I've been looking at the statistics. George, do you know how many manhours are spent on the opening and closing, maintenance and upkeep of our toilet stall doors? George: No sir, I do not. Mr Steinbrenner: That's a shame George because neither do I. I really need a number to help convince the board. Well anyway I'm sure its a lot. That's why, starting today, no more stall doors in Yankee stadium! George: But sir, won't the fans want their privacy? Mr Steinbrenner: That's what the bathroom door is for. Think of how fast the queues would go without people having to constantly open and close and open and close the stall doors. Noone would be embarrassed if everyone has to do it, it'd be just like being in the stands! Hey there's an idea, replace the regular toilet seats with ones that look like stadium seats! Big Stein is on a roll! [Mr Steinbrenner continues talking. Cut to Jerry's Apartment] Jerry: So he kept talking to you. On the john. For twenty minutes? George: Yep. Twenty long, long, long... minutes. Jerry: Does he often talk to his employees on the can? George: How should I know?! I can't just ask people. Jerry: Did you uh, you know... George: No I didn't catch a glimpse! Elaine: [Trying not to laugh] So why did he want to talk to you on the toilet? George: I don't know, apparently FDR used to do it during World War Two or something. I think this is just my final act of degradation before he fires me. Jerry: Hey speaking of World War Two, Eva and I were in bed last night and she did that thing again. George: The sleep saluting? Elaine: Jerry you're crazy, she was probably just stretching or something. Jerry: But it went straight up like a rocket! George: But she knows you're Jewish right. Why would a Nazi have a relationship, let alone sex, with a Jew? Jerry: How would I know what a Nazi thinks? George: Maybe it's like a rebellion thing. Like her parents are Nazis and she's doing this because she knows they'd disapprove. Jerry: George not everyone hates their parents as much as you do. And besides, how would I ever find out if that was true anyway? Kramer: [clicks fingers] I'll do it. goodog fucked around with this message at 14:25 on Jul 25, 2011 |
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Jul 25, 2011 12:34
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:58 |
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Goddamn, that's great. I want to watch that episode right now. It just needs a good way to tie all the individual stories together. Stare-Out fucked around with this message at 13:19 on Jul 25, 2011 |
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Jul 25, 2011 13:15
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Haha god drat. Thanks for actually writing my episode idea. That owns.
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Jul 25, 2011 14:21
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El Negocio posted:George: Maybe it's like a rebellion thing. Like her parents are Nazis and she's doing this because she knows they'd disapprove.
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Jul 25, 2011 19:32
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Wow, I didn't realize it wasn't a real script until I got to the nazi part. During the toilet scene I kept thinking "haha I remember this episode" 
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Jul 25, 2011 23:12
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Konec Hry posted:Wow, I didn't realize it wasn't a real script until I got to the nazi part. During the toilet scene I kept thinking "haha I remember this episode" That's because there was one where Mr. Wilhelm told George his next project while he was on the john but George stayed outside the bathroom and missed the whole thing.
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Jul 25, 2011 23:36
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Konec Hry posted:Wow, I didn't realize it wasn't a real script until I got to the nazi part. During the toilet scene I kept thinking "haha I remember this episode" E: ^ 
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Jul 25, 2011 23:37
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jojoinnit posted:Well he obviously used parts of that episode where George doesn't follow Wilhelm into the toilet only to find out that Wilhelm had been talking the whole time and had given him an important assignment. It's all downtown, George!
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Jul 26, 2011 00:18
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I'm working on a seinfeld parody trailer and I'm specifically looking for moments where george and/or jerry are talking about the subject of love in a very morose, sober way. Help?
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Jul 26, 2011 01:31
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bruckner posted:I'm working on a seinfeld parody trailer and I'm specifically looking for moments where george and/or jerry are talking about the subject of love in a very morose, sober way. Help? Right here, George. In here. (pointing to his chest) Try opening this up. You'll find the biggest dating scene in the world. - The Muffin Tops
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Jul 26, 2011 02:28
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In honor of this week's Curb: After every sip?!
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Jul 26, 2011 02:32
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stratdax posted:It's all downtown, George! He pulled a Lyndon B Johnson.
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Jul 26, 2011 14:22
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bruckner posted:I'm working on a seinfeld parody trailer and I'm specifically looking for moments where george and/or jerry are talking about the subject of love in a very morose, sober way. Help? The beginning of "The Engagement". Also, all I do is make Seinfeld gifs anymore. 
penismightier fucked around with this message at 21:17 on Jul 26, 2011 |
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Jul 26, 2011 20:56
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penismightier posted:I sent: Holy poo poo, this one is killing me. I can see it now - George with a five o'clock shadow, wearing some shabby jacket (that Kramer gave him in a convergence of storylines.) He's looking around the table, brow furrowed, mouth slightly agape, but in the end he just shrugs and keeps eating the soup. Chicolini posted:In honor of this week's Curb: After every sip?! This week's Curb was like watching half a dozen Seinfeld episodes at once, with all the various quirky titles and terms being thrown around ("You know what you are? You're a Social Assassin!" "She's verbal texting!" "I'm the dessert referee.") Best episode thus far in the season by far.
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Jul 27, 2011 02:28
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRf_A07Elyw This is how I walk all the time.
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Jul 27, 2011 08:36
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Locutus of Bald posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRf_A07Elyw I walk like this, also with Julia Louis-Dreyfus laughing at me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aSw-tYVWg4 I drive like this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5I60vNoybs Edit: This is my Wiz lady. Lady Wiz! ZoDiAC_ fucked around with this message at 10:01 on Jul 27, 2011 |
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Jul 27, 2011 09:59
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKAbh3Q2c_w
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Jul 27, 2011 10:03
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George: She had a fairy, Jerry. Jerry: A fairyjerry? George: (sarcastically) Ha. HA, ha. A fairy. It's like a little point of light. Apparently they all have 'em. They just follow you around. From birth. Jerry: So? What's the problem? George: Well... do you think... it has to watch? When you're... Jerry: Visiting Gerudo Valley? George: Yeah. Jerry: Not only does it have to watch, I hear that sometimes they join in. Some men would call that a threesome. George: *perking up* Really? Jerry: *nodding* No. At best, what you've got there is a two-and-a-tenthsome. George: A two-and-a-tenthsome? Jerry: Yup. George: I've never had a two-and-a-tenthsome before. Jerry: Few men have. You have to ask yourself - is the extra tenth really worth the risk that you'll be disappointing two women? It is a woman, right? George: Well, it's a fairy. They're all female. Jerry: No they're not! George: They're not?! Oh, god! It's our third date tomorrow! I can't ask now!
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Jul 27, 2011 10:22
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JethroMcB posted:This week's Curb was like watching half a dozen Seinfeld episodes at once, with all the various quirky titles and terms being thrown around ("You know what you are? You're a Social Assassin!" "She's verbal texting!" "I'm the dessert referee.") Best episode thus far in the season by far. I've noticed a couple of Seinfeld jokes in Curb so far this series. Larry being the "Social Assassin" was a lot like when Elaine wanted Kramer to tell her friend to change her haircut knowing he was the only one who could do it. Also, last week when the guy asked Larry to watch his laptop was a lot like a similar bit in Seinfeld where (I think) George is asked to watch someone's suitcase. Can't remember which episode that's from, though. The most recent episode was great though.
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Jul 28, 2011 13:49
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Suzie? Cancel my appointment with Doctor Bison.
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Jul 28, 2011 16:26
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Mickolution posted:I've noticed a couple of Seinfeld jokes in Curb so far this series. Larry being the "Social Assassin" was a lot like when Elaine wanted Kramer to tell her friend to change her haircut knowing he was the only one who could do it. Also, last week when the guy asked Larry to watch his laptop was a lot like a similar bit in Seinfeld where (I think) George is asked to watch someone's suitcase. Can't remember which episode that's from, though. They repeat a lot of jokes from Seinfeld on Curb. I think there's an episode where Larry and Jeff are on a plane and Larry gets weirded out because Jeff doesn't want to read anything, for example.
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Jul 28, 2011 17:51
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dog poop n doritos posted:They repeat a lot of jokes from Seinfeld on Curb. I think there's an episode where Larry and Jeff are on a plane and Larry gets weirded out because Jeff doesn't want to read anything, for example. Haha, don't remember that, but I can imagine it perfectly.
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Jul 28, 2011 22:50
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I think I remember that, Larry is complaining,"What, you're just going to sit there staring straight ahead for the whole flight?"
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Jul 28, 2011 23:06
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Jerusalem posted:I think I remember that, Larry is complaining,"What, you're just going to sit there staring straight ahead for the whole flight?" That's Elaine to Puddy on their flight home from Europe. Poor Vegetable Lasagna 
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Jul 28, 2011 23:33
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esperantinc posted:That's Elaine to Puddy on their flight home from Europe. I think I'm at the nexus of the threads!
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Jul 28, 2011 23:41
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Or when Larry makes that "ahhh" noise and pretends like he's doing a commercial for coffee. Doesn't Jerry do that once?
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Jul 29, 2011 04:20
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Oh, I, uh, I disagree. You've, uh, you've been living in America too long. (indicates the bag of oranges) You've forgotten what it's like to have no oranges.
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Jul 29, 2011 04:23
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I defy you to come up with a better name than "Seven".
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Jul 29, 2011 04:40
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Like keys, George. They look like keys.
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Jul 29, 2011 04:51
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Human Tornada posted:Like keys, George. They look like keys. They're eating cheese, George. CHEESE! 
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Jul 29, 2011 05:49
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Parachute posted:I defy you to come up with a better name than "Seven". Mickey.
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Jul 29, 2011 07:01
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Uh... Why don't you just tell me the name of the movie you want to see?
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Jul 29, 2011 18:17
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Poor Pinkus. Poor little Pinkus.
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Jul 29, 2011 18:22
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How about Mug? Mug Costanza!
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Jul 29, 2011 18:26
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Brace yourself, madam, for an all-out bidding war. But this time, advantage Varnsen!
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Jul 29, 2011 18:41
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Leyburn posted:How about Mug? Mug Costanza! How about Bisquik? Pimento? Gherkin? Sauce? Maxwell House?
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Jul 29, 2011 19:11
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Jul 30, 2011 00:41
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"I know what reserving a car means." "That's the thing.... I don't think you do!"
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Jul 30, 2011 02:11
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"Yeah, you better give me the insurance, because I am gonna beat the hell out of this car."
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Jul 30, 2011 04:01
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This episode also has what is one of my all time favorite quotes: "Moving cars from one side of the street to the other don't take no more sense than putting on a pair of pants. My question to you is who's putting your pants on?"
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Jul 30, 2011 04:03
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