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toadee
Aug 16, 2003

North American Turtle Boy Love Association

Mornacale posted:

So your premise is that it's alright as long as it's a joke?


Well its definitely different than if it were a magazine full of serious articles that were completely wrong/dumb/lazy/stupid/all of the above.

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stuart scott
Mar 9, 2007

It's a giant joke issue. It's not really a particularly funny joke but it's kind of ridiculous to act like it's some kind of travesty.

Akileese
Feb 6, 2005

stuart scott irl posted:

It's a giant joke issue. It's not really a particularly funny joke but it's kind of ridiculous to act like it's some kind of travesty.

Wait is it a real magazine, like people actually spent actual working hours making this?

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

stuart scott irl posted:

It's a giant joke issue. It's not really a particularly funny joke but it's kind of ridiculous to act like it's some kind of travesty.

A supposedly-respectable source of journalism putting out a "joke issue" based on favoritism for one of its subjects is actually pretty bad.

e: ^^^ And people are paying a subscription to read it.

Holy Diverticulitis
Dec 8, 2009

damn good anus! and hot!

Akileese posted:

Wait is it a real magazine, like people actually spent actual working hours making this?
Over the years I've had a lot of magazines start appearing in my mailbox for free, but ESPN is the only one that's actually seemed insulting.

Rousimar Pauladeen
Feb 27, 2007

I hate the mods I hate the mods I hate the mods! I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS! Hey wait a minute why do the mods hate me I'm contributing to the conversation I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS I HA

Mornacale posted:

A supposedly-respectable source of journalism putting out a "joke issue" based on favoritism for one of its subjects is actually pretty bad.

e: ^^^ And people are paying a subscription to read it.

Most of the people I know who read ESPN aren't paying anything. I haven't had to pay for it ever.

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?

Mornacale posted:

A supposedly-respectable source of journalism

a what now

It's a crappy magazine that I think most people only read when they are pooping or in a waiting room somewhere. I think the world will survive one joke issue.

DO YALL WANT A BOXC
Jul 20, 2010

HAHA! WOOOOOOO WOOO!
Fun Shoe

MorningView posted:

a what now

It's a crappy magazine that I think most people only read when they are pooping or in a waiting room somewhere. I think the world will survive one joke issue.

it is a good pooping magazine, though, you have to admit

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?
That and cheap insider are the only reasons I get it.

soggybagel
Aug 6, 2006
The official account of NFL Tackle Phil Loadholt.

Let's talk Football.

Mornacale posted:

A supposedly-respectable source of journalism putting out a "joke issue" based on favoritism for one of its subjects is actually pretty bad.

e: ^^^ And people are paying a subscription to read it.

This isn't the New Yorker or the Economist doing a joke issue. And even if it was, its one issue. Sports magazines are not really what I'd call at all respectable sources of journalism. Sports Illustrated has an annual swim suit issue. Big deal.

Also even if you did pay for a yearly subscription its what, 13 dollars or something?

Mornacale posted:

So your premise is that it's alright as long as it's a joke?

Yeah pretty much.

E: I see MorningView chimed in and yeah. Its basically a magazine you would read to pass a few minutes before a doctors appointment or something.

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?
I didn't even notice the part where the hockey preview was an afterthought to all the bullshit, that actually kinda redeems the whole thing to me.

St1cky
Aug 16, 2005

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Mike Alden, supergenius.

MorningView posted:

I didn't even notice the part where the hockey preview was an afterthought to all the bullshit, that actually kinda redeems the whole thing to me.

I'd rather read a real issue where ESPN praises Boston for being the best sports city ever.

leokitty
Apr 5, 2005

I live. I die. I live again.
I paged through it and read some of it and it's a bad issue of a magazine and it's dumb. I wouldn't call it a joke issue as there is plenty of serious in between things like dumb columns by Lang and Leary.

MatildaTheHun
Aug 31, 2011

here's the thing donovan, I'm always hungry
I remember when people from Boston were actually passionate sports fans, not just gloryhunters. I swear if the Eagles don't win 8 superbowls in the next 3 years I will explode with rage.

Reformed Pissboy
Nov 6, 2003

There has GOT to be someone better than Denis Leary to associate with Boston. Even for Boston he's an insufferable rear end in a top hat :mad:

The broken bones
Jan 3, 2008

Out beyond winning and losing, there is a field.

I will meet you there.

Transfatuation posted:

There has GOT to be someone better than Denis Leary to associate with Boston. Even for Boston he's an insufferable rear end in a top hat :mad:

ben affleck?

BackInTheUSSR
Jun 22, 2004

1.5 HR/9
ACE
dane cook would work but his only knowledge of baseball is how many octobers there are.

SporkOfTruth
Sep 1, 2006

this kid walked up to me and was like man schmitty your stache is ghetto and I was like whatever man your 3b look like a dishrag.

he was like damn.
Thank god I have 2 cheap ESPN the Mag subscriptions (I drop the other on in the student lounge), so I can burn a copy in protest.

TheModernAmerican posted:

I remember when people from Boston were actually passionate sports fans, not just gloryhunters. I swear if the Eagles don't win 8 superbowls in the next 3 years I will explode with rage.

As a Philadelphia fan, oh god no please. You've already seen what the Phillies fanbase has become over the past 5 years. :negative:

Bigass Moth
Mar 6, 2004

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...
I have relatives from Boston and they are absolutely insufferable about sports. Even though the Celtics have won a shitload of titles and the Patriots have been in 7 Super Bowls, they acted so downtrodden until the Red Sox "finally" won (and then again). Come to Cleveland and witness some real pain :(

Sash!
Mar 16, 2001


So dominant that their hockey has won once in like forty years!

R.D. Mangles
Jan 10, 2004


Literally kiss the rings

Also, ESPN succeeded by getting people to actually acknowledge the existence of ESPN Magazine

Heaf
Jan 15, 2008

People say we suck at sports but they don't understand
It's hard to catch with holes right through your hands

BackInTheUSSR posted:

dane cook would work but his only knowledge of baseball is how many octobers there are.

No one should want Dane Cook to represent their city ever.

RembrandtQEinstein
Jul 1, 2009

A GOD, A MESSIAH, AN ARCHANGEL, A KING, A PRINCE, AND AN ALL TERRAIN VEHICLE.

R.D. Mangles posted:

Literally kiss the rings

Also, ESPN succeeded by getting people to actually acknowledge the existence of ESPN Magazine

Not everybody

poly and open-minded
Nov 22, 2006

In BOD we trust

Heaf posted:

No one should want Dane Cook to represent their city ever.

Gladiatorial games

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

TheModernAmerican posted:

I remember when people from Boston were actually passionate sports fans, not just gloryhunters. I swear if the Eagles don't win 8 superbowls in the next 3 years I will explode with rage.

ahahahahahahah this loving guy right here

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

Sash! posted:

So dominant that their hockey has won once in like forty years!

i mean at least they're getting a bunch of media attention and they've won in the past 40 years

unlike the leafs

Rousimar Pauladeen
Feb 27, 2007

I hate the mods I hate the mods I hate the mods! I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS! Hey wait a minute why do the mods hate me I'm contributing to the conversation I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS I HA
Another Moneyball is stupid article from Mr. Oozing pumpkin. I'm pasting it so you don't give him the hits he wants.

quote:

I won’t be going to see "Moneyball." The movie celebrates the plague ruining sports: sabermetrics.

That is not intended as a shot at Bill James, Billy Beane or Michael Lewis.

Wait. Hell, maybe it is a dis — an unintended one — of James, Beane and Lewis.

They unwittingly conspired to remove much of the magic and mystery from baseball. They reduced the game to a statistical bore. It’s no longer enough to be down with OBP (on-base percentage). To talk the game, you now must understand OPS (on-base percentage plus slugging), VORP (value over replacement player), BABIP (batting average on balls in play) and on and on.

There’s a stat for nearly every action in baseball. Little is left to the imagination. Sports were never intended to be a computer program, stripped to cold, hard, indisputable, statistical facts. Sports — particularly for fans — are not science. Sports, like art, are supposed to be interpreted.

It’s difficult to interpret baseball these days. The stat geeks won’t let you argue. They quote sabermetrics and end all discussion. Is so-and-so a Hall of Famer? The sabermeticians will punch in the numbers and give you, in their mind, a definitive answer.

It’s boring. It’s ruining sports.

Sabermetrics or analytics are overrunning football, too. ESPN is pushing a new statistical way of analyzing NFL quarterbacks, Total Quarterback Rating.

The nerds are winning. They’re stealing the game from those of us who enjoy examining the gray areas of sports. We’re about 10 years away from a computer program that will write stats-based opinion pieces on sports.


Last season, the basketball analytics crowd was convinced that LeBron James and Dwight Howard deserved the MVP over Derrick Rose. The fact that Howard’s whiny, immature crybaby-rear end was even in the discussion tells you all you need to know about analyzing the game solely on statistics. The Orlando Magic were a joke last season in part because of the immature environment fostered by Howard.

As for James vs. Rose? Well, James devoured Rose in the Eastern Conference Finals. Rose’s defenders — most notably ESPN’s Ric Bucher — argued that Rose’s inferior supporting cast is what allowed the Heat and James to get the best of Rose and the Bulls. And by the time James disappeared in the NBA Finals, it was easy to see the merit of Bucher’s point.

It doesn’t really matter who deserved the NBA’s MVP award. What matters is that there was a fun, yearlong debate. As much as we enjoy watching the competition on the field or court, we take equal pleasure in interpreting and debating what we just saw.

Sabermetrics/analytics undermines the debate. They try to interject absolutes.

No one will ever convince me that John Elway isn’t the greatest quarterback/football player in NFL history. I know what I saw. I don’t care that Joe Montana won more Super Bowls. I don’t care that Dan Marino threw for more yards. I don’t care that Peyton Manning’s completion percentage is eight points higher.


I can and have argued credibly and passionately that Elway is the best QB and player in the history of the league. You are free to disagree. I invite you to disagree. I’d love to refute your erroneous position. Just bring more than stats to the table.

The games are about more than stats.

That’s what bothers me about this whole era of sports. In my lifetime, there have been two innovations that have significantly influenced sports fans: 1. fantasy leagues; 2. sabermetrics/analytics.

Again, the stat geeks are winning. Our perception of athletes and their value are primarily being dictated by statistics. Peyton Manning is the king of fantasy football; therefore, he is the king of real football. LeBron James is the king of fantasy basketball; therefore, he is the king of real basketball.

Is it a coincidence that James and Manning have both struggled in postseason play?

I don’t know the answer. But I want to discuss and debate it. And I don’t want to do it with people who simply want to quote stats. The answers and the questions that make sports special, unique, our collective national pastime, can’t be found on a stat sheet. They’re in our imaginations and our individual interpretation of what we witness.

When the "Moneyball" movie hysteria subsides, I hope the sabermeticians STFU.

No Safe Word
Feb 26, 2005

That's a really solid article.

No one can convince me that Randall Cunningham wasn't the greatest quarterback of all time, I know what I saw.

FairGame
Jul 24, 2001

Der Kommander

All of my opinions are correct and if you try to refute any of them with tangible evidence you are a nerd who should STFU.

The guy who wrote that fucks dogs. I can tell by the patterns in his sentence structure.

I know what I saw.

Groucho Marxist
Dec 9, 2005

Do you smell what The Mauk is cooking?
"The nerds are winning. They’re stealing the game from those of us who enjoy examining the gray areas of sports. We’re about 10 years away from a computer program that will write stats-based opinion pieces on sports."

Please please please let this happen.

hcreight
Mar 19, 2007

My name is Oliver Queen...
I watched ATH yesterday. Bill Plaschke won and used his rant time to say he saw Moneyball and really liked it and sort of apologized for spending years bashing Billy Beane and sabermetrics. Then he backtracked and said it was still mostly wrong and "there's more than one way to build a team." That's still progress, right?

Rousimar Pauladeen
Feb 27, 2007

I hate the mods I hate the mods I hate the mods! I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS! Hey wait a minute why do the mods hate me I'm contributing to the conversation I HATE THE MODS I HATE THE MODS I HA

hcreight posted:

I watched ATH yesterday. Bill Plaschke won and used his rant time to say he saw Moneyball and really liked it and sort of apologized for spending years bashing Billy Beane and sabermetrics. Then he backtracked and said it was still mostly wrong and "there's more than one way to build a team." That's still progress, right?

Ways to build a team:
1) Right way
2) Wrong way
3) Plaschke way*



*This is the wrong way but it is a lot faster.

No Safe Word
Feb 26, 2005

Groucho Marxist posted:

"The nerds are winning. They’re stealing the game from those of us who enjoy examining the gray areas of sports. We’re about 10 years away from a computer program that will write stats-based opinion pieces on sports."

Please please please let this happen.

We're 0 years away from such a program

Okay, so it's not an opinion piece (which is obviously a huge technological leap), but it basically ingests stats and creates a halfway-decent-if-not-still-somewhat-boilerplate-looking article.

MatildaTheHun
Aug 31, 2011

here's the thing donovan, I'm always hungry

SporkOfTruth posted:

As a Philadelphia fan, oh god no please. You've already seen what the Phillies fanbase has become over the past 5 years. :negative:

Yeah I know Philly would become even more insufferable than Boston could ever hope to be if our 2010s are like Boston's 2000s. It will be a disaster for sports writers everywhere.

I just want maybe a championship every 15 years. Or at least once in my life.

That'd be cool.

DO YALL WANT A BOXC
Jul 20, 2010

HAHA! WOOOOOOO WOOO!
Fun Shoe
i will say that i watch a lot less baseball than i did pre-sabermetrics but that's mainly because the mariners suck so goddamn bad

Medical Sword
May 23, 2005

Goghing, Goghing, gone

Groucho Marxist posted:

"The nerds are winning. They’re stealing the game from those of us who enjoy examining the gray areas of sports. We’re about 10 years away from a computer program that will write stats-based opinion pieces on sports."

Please please please let this happen.

Sabermetrics: totally uninterested in the gray areas of baseball

Twin Cinema
Jun 1, 2006



Playoffs are no big deal,
don't have a crap attack.
Why can't he understand that no one is forcing sabermetrics on everyone? He can still enjoy the game any way he wants.

Oh right, he's dumb.

Mr. Funny Pants
Apr 9, 2001

Michael Wilbon/Bill Plaschke/Generic idiot:
"This SABREmetric junk has to go, these bunch of loser stat heads in their basements with their computers, reducing the game to numbers, it's all junk."

Next topic, the Cy Young race:
"Joe Blow is leading the league with 24 wins and he has the best ERA, he should win it."

That's the part that's always cracked me up. It's not that they are against stats, if they were, they'd be anti-baseball. It's that they are against stats that they don't understand and are too lazy to learn. My knowledge of advanced stats is rudimentary at best, but their rise in prominence rekindled my interest in baseball.

stuart scott
Mar 9, 2007

quote:

There’s a stat for nearly every action in baseball. Little is left to the imagination. Sports were never intended to be a computer program, stripped to cold, hard, indisputable, statistical facts. Sports — particularly for fans — are not science. Sports, like art, are supposed to be interpreted.

Just gonna requote this awesome bit in response to that Whitlock garbage:

Eric Augenbraun posted:

Rejecting this claim only requires making the seemingly common-sense observation that baseball is not art. That is, it is wrong to say that baseball must be appreciated in the same ways that art is — as something we admire for its beauty, for the emotions it provokes in us, or for what it tells us about the world – because, unlike art, when the game of baseball is played, a large amount of essentially objective, numeric data is produced. Where there is an element of subjectivity is in how we arrange the data, how we interpret the data, which data we keep, and which data we throw away. With art, there is no equivalent. While we can agree that some art is better than other art, there is no data that emerges from the art itself that can serve as a basis for stating objectively which art is good and which art is bad.

Moreover, it makes no sense to say that “the obsession with numbers in baseball detracts from the game’s beauty” because numbers are far more intrinsic to baseball than beauty is. Baseball is a game. Ultimately, the goal of playing baseball (as with any game) is not to produce something beautiful, but to win. At the most fundamental level, the purpose of watching it is to see who wins.

You may indeed find watching people play poker to be like taking a stroll through the Museo Reina Sofía, and there would be nothing wrong with that. But to suggest that the obsession with numbers in poker (odds, for instance) detracts from the game’s intrinsic beauty would, for obvious reasons, be patently absurd. Baseball has far more in common with poker than it does Picasso’s Guernica.

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Crion
Sep 30, 2004
baseball.
Uhhh watching Kevin Gregg pitch in the ninth inning is, in fact, art

I am informed that tragedy and comedy are both classified as such

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