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vanessa posted:We've told people the first initial of the name we chose, but we won't reveal the name until the baby is born. But part of that is we also are trying not to reveal the gender (although I am terrible about keeping secrets about myself and have already blabbed to a few people who hopefully were kind enough to forget). We've chosen a pretty traditional name so I don't think there will be any negative reactions, but I don't need anyone saying "Oh I knew a _____ and that person was so (insert negative trait here)" before the baby gets here and making me doubt our choice. We didn't tell anyone Christopher's name before he was born, not even my parents. Then it turns out I gave him the same first and middle name of my high school friend's husband - who I completely forgot about when I was asking myself "does this conflict with any friends or family?" Ah well, they think it's a cute coincidence and he's a good guy anyways so there's nothing negative about it. I think Vesper is a cute name, although I can only think of the Bond girl in Casino Royale.
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Dec 8, 2011 19:05
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Ana Lucia Cortez posted:So my daughter's due to be born in three weeks. We've picked a name (Vesper) and I'm getting seriously annoyed with people's reactions. My husband and I think it's a cute, unique name but NO ONE likes it, and my mom (who is notorious for guilt-tripping and acting like I'm attacking her as a person if I make a decision she doesn't like) has been trying to convince me that it's a horrible, awful name better suited to a boy and our daughter will be ridiculed mercilessly in school. My best friend said that this is the name she'd use if she had a girl (though at 32 she and her husband plan not to have kids). Her choice was mostly based around the fact that we were big fans of the Vesper Holly books as kids. This probably biases me, but I think it's a great name, which I would use myself if I didn't have several names that were higher up on the list. Maybe show your mom the books to show her it's kind of a "real name?" They are/were extremely popular books.
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Dec 8, 2011 20:05
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I like Vesper. Did you choose a middle name also? I'm at 31 weeks tomorrow. It took me a few months to come up with names for my twins. I have shared them with the father and a handful of close friends and family, only because it was important to me that I not use a name of a person that I know. I'm still keeping the names secret because I don't want everyone's input.
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Dec 8, 2011 21:28
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Vesper sounds fine to me, but I can't help thinking of Princess Vespa from Spaceballs. But go for whatever you want and sod everyone else. I'm leaving MrsD. to choose girl names as long as I get dibs if we have a boy. Having said that, I do like the thought of Seren as a girls name - It's Welsh for "Star" and neither of us are remotely Welsh. Anyway, we had our 12 week scan today. Well it turned out to be our 12 week 6 day scan :-) The revised due date is 15th June 2012. I'd said I wanted a summer baby to counteract all the winter birthdays in the family but I didn't mean that literal! Anyway, meet our baby to be:- 
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Dec 8, 2011 21:56
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I've never heard the name Vesper before. To be honest, it strikes me a more masculine than feminine, but if it's your daughters name, then it will be feminine. I like unique names, and that is certainly a good one. Reached 30 weeks over here and feeling pretty good. I passed my second glucose test, but just barely. The doc says to just watch my carbs and sugar, so I'm being more conscious of that.
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Dec 8, 2011 22:44
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Ana Lucia Cortez posted:So my daughter's due to be born in three weeks. We've picked a name (Vesper) and I'm getting seriously annoyed with people's reactions. My husband and I think it's a cute, unique name but NO ONE likes it, and my mom (who is notorious for guilt-tripping and acting like I'm attacking her as a person if I make a decision she doesn't like) has been trying to convince me that it's a horrible, awful name better suited to a boy and our daughter will be ridiculed mercilessly in school. I think it's perdy  It sounds like a faerie princess. Mr. Darcy, I quite like Seren also!Neither my mom nor my husband's like what I picked out for our son (Arthur) but welp, that's gonna be his name, and I knew that the moment I found out he was going to be a boy. They're lucky I didn't go with Perseus or Orion or Kenzo or some even more nerdy thing. (Hubby's mom likes Lee. I live in Mississippi. EVERYONE is named Lee.) And everyone seems to ask "well, what are you going to call him?" Does he have to have a nickname? Neither I nor my brother ever did. poo poo, we're in the South, just call him Bubba for all I care. (Please do not actually call him Bubba) I'M MAD ABOUT NAMES  Also, I'm at 34 weeks and I have bloated blobby feet  Plus the baby might be on the large size (I have an ultrasound next week to help estimate just how large), so my fears of delivering early have returned. I was hoping for a tiny-mite like my husband, who was around 5lbs at full term but I guess my stupid monster genes won out.
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Dec 8, 2011 23:12
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Being a Napoleonic war geek I think Arthur is fine (Arthur Wellesley aka The Duke of Wellington) and being a Brit King Arthur works quite well too. Ironically MrsD's family is actually related to Robert E. Lee so we do actually have an excuse to use Lee, or Robert. If we have a boy I'm pushing for James George. James for my Grandfather and George for my father in law.
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Dec 8, 2011 23:24
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Chicken McNobody posted:I think it's perdy Ultrasounds are notoriously wrong about sizes, commonly being off by a pound even. Bigger babies feel sturdier to me. Don't be sad about your probably-larger-than-5-lb Baby! 7lbs is average, I think. Head size (and shoulder possibly) matters more if you're just worried about the pain of pushing out a baby.  Your body is made to stretch.Sit and put your feet up. The end of pregnancy was never any fun for me. Soon you'll have a baby and tiny or average or large, he'll still be your beautiful Arthur (I like it).
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Dec 8, 2011 23:26
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I've been winding MrsD. up with horror stories about big Darcy babies. I was almost a month early and was 9 lbs. She's adamant that this won't happen to her. watch this space... edit: also Arty is a great cheesy nickname.
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Dec 8, 2011 23:36
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Chiming in that ultrasounds for sizing are a crap shoot at best. I went in at 38 weeks to see if she had finally turned after being head up till 37 weeks and they gave me a weight estimate of 10 pounds 6 ounces. I had a home birth and she came out at 7 pounds 13 ounces. So take the ultrasounds for a grain of salt.
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Dec 8, 2011 23:46
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Kubricize posted:Chiming in that ultrasounds for sizing are a crap shoot at best. I went in at 38 weeks to see if she had finally turned after being head up till 37 weeks and they gave me a weight estimate of 10 pounds 6 ounces. I had a home birth and she came out at 7 pounds 13 ounces. So take the ultrasounds for a grain of salt. Mine was right on the dot. On Friday they told me he looked around 8 pounds, on Tuesday he came out 8 pounds 1 ounce.  6 weeks old! Lyz fucked around with this message at 00:01 on Dec 9, 2011 |
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Dec 8, 2011 23:59
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My sizing ultrasound at 39 weeks estimated him at 8lbs 3oz, two weeks later he came out 9lbs 1oz. So it was probably pretty accurate.
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Dec 9, 2011 00:52
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^^ Adorable! Thanks everyone for reassuring me about Vesper! It first came to mind after glancing over my albums and seeing Bjork's Vespertine. Then I remembered Vesper Lynd from James Bond. I didn't know about the Vesper Holly books until just a few days ago, but that only cements my attraction to the name. We're not sure about middle names but Vesper Belle is a major contender. I'm wishing now that we hadn't told anyone, but whatever, screw them.
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Dec 9, 2011 01:00
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I think relatives and friends just need a moment when hearing an unusual name. Like when you said it in your first post I was thinking, "Vesper?" And by the time I'd read it a few times I really loved the sound of it.
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Dec 9, 2011 01:29
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Question for anyone with a little one 6-8 weeks, if you keep them balanced can they basically stay standing on their own?
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Dec 9, 2011 01:58
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Cage Kicker posted:Question for anyone with a little one 6-8 weeks, if you keep them balanced can they basically stay standing on their own? Yeah, my kid had very strong legs from an early age. It was freaky. But it didn't mean he walked any earlier than other kids.
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Dec 9, 2011 02:39
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Cage Kicker posted:Question for anyone with a little one 6-8 weeks, if you keep them balanced can they basically stay standing on their own? Yeh it`s fine for them to stand with help. Erin would always stand and stomp her feet on people`s laps instead of sitting. When you did try to sit her in anything she was always stiff as a board till you tickled the back of her knees.
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Dec 9, 2011 04:41
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Yeah, he's a brusier. He's recently started doing a lot of smiling though so having him stand on my lap grinning in my face is kinda cool 
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Dec 9, 2011 05:12
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Ana Lucia Cortez posted:
My husband and I decided on names while we were still trying to get pregnant, and we also decided to keep the names a secret. Mostly because the first names are family names from his side of the family and I want to surprise his family with them. When I did get pregnant, it was actually a month after we had decided to stop trying, so I was really in shock over finding out I was pregnant, and my husband was on the other side of the country for a work thing, and in a moment of serious weakness, I told my aunt the names I had picked when I called to tell her I was pregnant (relevant side note, I don't have parents or grandparents, so my aunt is basically my only family member, except my half brother and my aunt's kids.) Her response to the girl's name was a sharp intake of breath, followed by "That's terrible! You can't do that to a child!" and her response to the boy name was "I don't know, doesn't that sound like a sissy British boy who wets his breeches?" And though I love really unusual names, my husband disapproves, so both of the names are very traditional and old-fashioned names (some of the few old-fashioned/traditional names that haven't made a huge comeback). I wasn't really expecting such a backlash over such traditional names. And now she's constantly hounding me to name my child (if it's a girl) "India, China, Asia, Ireland, or Indiana." WTF aunt.  I've still kept it a secret from his family, but I really, really wish I had stuck to my guns about not telling people. Though one friend did give me a very diplomatic "That's so different than what I would have expected!"
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Dec 9, 2011 05:21
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Cage Kicker posted:Yeah, he's a brusier. He's recently started doing a lot of smiling though so having him stand on my lap grinning in my face is kinda cool Our daughter would do this thing where she'd stiffen up her whole body if you pulled on her hands, so you could pull her from laying down into a standing position like a little mummy. Babies are awesome.
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Dec 9, 2011 14:25
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Thanks everyone for the reassurance re: ultrasounds...I know they're not necessarily accurate, I'm just having the late-term freakouts. Lyz, that's a mighty cute baby Ana Lucia Cortez posted:It first came to mind after glancing over my albums and seeing Bjork's Vespertine. Now I like it twice as much! Mnemosyne posted:And now she's constantly hounding me to name my child (if it's a girl) "India, China, Asia, Ireland, or Indiana." 
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Dec 9, 2011 15:20
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The only response to that is 'We named THE DOG Indiana' in your best Sean Connery impersonation.
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Dec 9, 2011 15:51
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Cage Kicker posted:Question for anyone with a little one 6-8 weeks, if you keep them balanced can they basically stay standing on their own? Mine loooves standing and he's got some pretty rugged legs. Even at an early age he preferred sitting to being held on his back. Unfortunately the downside to that is when we're in bed and he doesn't want to go to sleep he spends an hour kicking me and driving me insane... and if I roll away the crying starts. Yeah, last night was not fun. For the others with babies around this age - what's their sleep schedules like? I take mine up to bed around 10pm usually, and after a hour of feeding and playing he sleeps, wakes up around 3 and 6, and usually we're up around 9 or 10. Is that a good amount of sleep? Should I be trying to get him to bed earlier?
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Dec 9, 2011 16:13
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I'm due in 2 weeks (so anytime really) and we have nothing for names. I'm starting to freak out a little. There's just nothing that I feel strongly about. Any number of generic names (Joe, Matt, Ben, etc) would be fine with me, but my husband feels strongly that a unique name is needed. I have strong hate feelings for most of what he suggests. But no strong feeling of love for anything to counter with. I need a name.
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Dec 9, 2011 22:05
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limegrnxj posted:I'm due in 2 weeks (so anytime really) and we have nothing for names. I'm starting to freak out a little. There's just nothing that I feel strongly about. Any number of generic names (Joe, Matt, Ben, etc) would be fine with me, but my husband feels strongly that a unique name is needed. I have strong hate feelings for most of what he suggests. But no strong feeling of love for anything to counter with. I need a name. I know a couple that didn't have a name picked out before giving birth. They wanted to meet their son before giving him a name - they picked the name Teague.
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Dec 9, 2011 22:25
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Ana Lucia Cortez posted:^^ Adorable! Somehow I tricked my wife into liking the name Saria for the kid. None of her family liked the name, but luckily she adopted my attitude of, "who cares what you think, it's our kid."
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Dec 9, 2011 22:54
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jhunter46 posted:Somehow I tricked my wife into liking the name Saria for the kid. None of her family liked the name, but luckily she adopted my attitude of, "who cares what you think, it's our kid." Apparently we're not as awesome at creating internet handles, dear husband of mine. Vesper Belle is unique and pretty. Screw the haters.
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Dec 10, 2011 05:45
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limegrnxj posted:I'm due in 2 weeks (so anytime really) and we have nothing for names. I'm starting to freak out a little. There's just nothing that I feel strongly about. Any number of generic names (Joe, Matt, Ben, etc) would be fine with me, but my husband feels strongly that a unique name is needed. I have strong hate feelings for most of what he suggests. But no strong feeling of love for anything to counter with. I need a name. What about a unique/generic name. If we have a boy I plan on going with Henry or something else equally old fashioned - it's not weird, but it's also not very common. Seems like it'd be a good compromise. Unless he'd want something like Ulysses then you're probably SOL.
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Dec 10, 2011 08:20
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bamzilla posted:What about a unique/generic name. If we have a boy I plan on going with Henry or something else equally old fashioned - it's not weird, but it's also not very common. Seems like it'd be a good compromise. Unless he'd want something like Ulysses then you're probably SOL. That's kind of the way we went with our girls' names (Claire Margaret and Sadie Anne)- classic, old-timey names that don't strike anyone as odd but there also won't be five of them in her class at school. If we were having a boy, I wanted to name him Hunter Matthew, my husband wasn't completely sold on that but it wound up being irrelevant anyway.
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Dec 10, 2011 14:00
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Going on the social security baby names site and looking at popular names 100 years ago is pretty fun and can help you find a name that used to be popular but isn't anymore You can also see funny but predictable trends. For example, if you look at the popularity of a name over the years for Calvin, you'll notice that it's never ranked higher than 100 except for 1923-1928. Bet you can guess why.
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Dec 10, 2011 15:17
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bamzilla posted:What about a unique/generic name. If we have a boy I plan on going with Henry or something else equally old fashioned - it's not weird, but it's also not very common. Seems like it'd be a good compromise. Unless he'd want something like Ulysses then you're probably SOL. Oh yeah, he's firmly into "weird" territory. He said I could pick the first name and he'd do the middle. But he's picking Ozymandias if we go that route. I'm aiming for the whole name to be nice. No one goes nameless forever, I shall continue to search.
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Dec 10, 2011 22:09
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My beautiful daughter Amelia was born on Thursday morning, 10 days overdue. We were booked in for an induction on Sunday, but labour began while we were out walking the dog. My wife had a midwife-led birth using only gas and air and a birthing pool. She's a doctor and her birth plan was the most detailed the midwife had ever seen - 'twas like a bloody essay. Personally, my own birth plan would have simply consisted of the word "epidural", but relatively speaking she didn't seem to have too rough a time of things with the route she went. The whole thing went fairly smoothly and quickly. There was nothing too remarkable about the actual pregnancy period, except for the fact that we moved house. We were the only couple in our antenatal (NCT for UK goons - highly recommended) group who knew the sex of our baby, as our previous area had a tell policy and our new one didn't. We also had a private 4D scan which, among other things, confirmed the sex. Hope this isn't considered too "chatty" for thread. I am happy to try and answer any questions about the specifics of our experience. It's always nice to ask things of people who have gone through what you're about to go through, or just to gain a little bit of reassurance about something. OneSizeFitsAll fucked around with this message at 23:55 on Dec 10, 2011 |
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Dec 10, 2011 23:49
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10 days overdue, wow! Congratulations. Using gas and air isn't common here, so I'm curious - how is her recovery going? It seems like it would be out of your system quickly and you'd be on your feet right away.
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Dec 11, 2011 08:34
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Thanks. I don't have anything to compare it to, but the baby was born at 7:24am, and we left the hospital roughly 12 hours later at around 7pm. They initially wheeled her in a chair from the birthing pool back to her room as she was bleeding a lot due to her membranes being a bit ragged, i.e. not coming away in one piece. This stopped very quickly before any drugs were required, though she was also given three stitches pretty much straight away for a very small tear. She was dizzy for about a day due to blood loss and dehydration (I kept giving her water in between the gas and air, particularly when she was in the pool, but apparently I should have given her even more), but she was on her feet about an hour and a half after birth to have a shower. While we were still at the hospital the baby had a couple of different health checks, my wife tried to catch up on some sleep and was also given some food. She's been pretty tired ever since we came home, but that's due to the rigours of looking after a newborn rather than the labour process itself. About the gas and air itself - it leaves the system after around 5-10 minutes. One of the advantages to it is that you have complete control over the frequency and amount that you take (she typically had a few big inhalations each contraction). Before she got into the birthing pool she held the mouthpiece, and afterwards it was my responsibility to do so; I had her open her mouth when she wanted it, so that she didn't have to speak. I didn't know it wasn't common in the US and am curious why - it's great for women who want a bit more control and don't need something as strong as an epidural.
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Dec 11, 2011 15:12
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Yeah, it's so maddening that Americans don't have more choices. I either have to go without pain medication or take the medication (narcotics, spinal block, or epidural) and be stuck in bed for an indeterminate amount of time. And this is on the west coast where all the staff has been telling me they're more progressive. Another thing if you don't mind answering, does the UK do spontaneous pushing or directed pushing? I want to do spontaneous pushing, where I push when my body says so but my doctor and one of the nurses had never heard of that before. But my doula has given birth in Germany and that's what she did so I'm wondering if Europe does that generally.
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Dec 11, 2011 19:37
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I used the gas. It made me feel drunk. Later on, it did nothing for me. Jerk gas > Anyway, I was up and about maybe an hour later to go pee and shower, but I was wobbly on my feet.Tesla Insanely Coil posted:
Isn't pushing when your body tells you to the same as pushing when you have a contraction? Isn't that when they'd tell you to push anyway? I don't understand. I had no clue when to push btw, I couldn't feel those contractions (and I didn't have an epidural or anything, what the hell, body)
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Dec 11, 2011 21:15
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Tesla Insanely Coil posted:Yeah, it's so maddening that Americans don't have more choices. I either have to go without pain medication or take the medication (narcotics, spinal block, or epidural) and be stuck in bed for an indeterminate amount of time. And this is on the west coast where all the staff has been telling me they're more progressive. From what I understand spontaneous pushing is the norm here as long as you aren't having an epidural, in which case you don't have enough sensation to listen to your body and thus directed pushing is required. The midwife was specific in telling my wife not to push until her body was telling her to. I imagine it's generally common in Europe. It sounds like the whole process is a lot more medicalised in the US, with much less of a midwifery tradition.
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Dec 11, 2011 22:41
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Panne posted:
Yes to your first question. Second question: From what I understand, American nurses/doctors encourage you to start pushing right away even if your body wants to take a break. Here is what I've gathered: During the pushing stage, you have contractions which are meant to push the baby out. You are expected to have an urge to push. But you may not have that urge if you're on pain meds and also I read a study that said many women naturally want to rest and don't feel any urge to push for up to an hour after reaching 10cm. In America, you are encouraged to start pushing right away (again, from what I understand - I've never been through this yet). Here are some excerpts from the article I posted: quote:The use of directed Valsalva pushing technique is so ingrained in the culture of American birth practice that it has been difficult to make the change to an approach that requires support of the woman's spontaneous urges. American women have also grown to expect specific direction during the second stage, especially as fewer attend childbirth classes and instead rely on media depictions of birth, which are growing in number and accessibility. Commonly used childbirth films also portray women being directed to hold their breath and push. quote:Phases So if I do get an epidural, I'm going to use laboring down, barring medical problems. If that was more info than you were looking for, my apologies. I've had a lot of fun learning about all of this. When I got pregnant, my ideas of labor and delivery came from TV and I've had to re-learn a lot.
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Dec 12, 2011 00:37
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During my first child's birth, I was instructed to push for ten complete seconds each contraction by one of the midwives attending the birth (she used to be a nurse and she was much more 'medical' than my other midwife) for each contraction. It was unpleasant. I pushed for 2 hours. For my next child's birth I had the other midwife there with an assistant and she didn't tell me how long to push. I pushed for however long I felt was necessary with each contraction. I pushed for 40 minutes. For my last child's birth I had a different midwife and her assistant since I had moved to a different state. I pushed for like 5 minutes. My child was in a rush to be born. For all three births I pushed after my body started naturally pushing on its own. I couldn't have stopped it. The sensation was really strong. My first child's birth, my body was pushing before I reached 10 cm. ETA: I am in the US.
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Dec 12, 2011 00:50
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I am also in the US (California to be exact). I had a hospital birth. I was told not to push until my body made me. Once that started, the midwife, nurses, and perinatalogist (very complicated pregnancy, 6 weeks premature, had to have the specialists there!) basically just stood around and told me I was doing a great job while I controlled everything. I pushed because my body told me to, I stopped when I wanted. Also, I had an epidural and still had that amount of control, no one told me when or how to push.
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Dec 12, 2011 01:11
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