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TapTheForwardAssist
Apr 9, 2007

Pretty Little Lyres
They're going to let us have alcohol for our office Christmas party, so I was thinking to have some full-classic 5-ingredient "punch". Doing it old-school Raj-style with the five ingredients: liquor, water, lemon (or lime), sugar, tea.

I was looking to use Batavia-arrack for the liquor, just to get that smokiness and bring them some more business. Anyone have a preferred recipe for the proportions for the other ingredients? Any 6th/7th ingredients which add a lot of character but don't mess up the basis "panj"/punch concept?

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Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Oh I got your back. Although the fifth ingredient is generally held to be "spice," not tea. Tea takes the place of water, when used.

I know I've been talking a lot of punch in this thread lately, but I seriously cannot recommend Wondrich's Punch! enough. I am saying this with total honesty and no exaggeration: it changed my life.

Okay so I haven't made United Service Punch before myself, but I have made many dozens of gallons of punch in the last year and I reckon I can read a punch fairly well on the page.

The recipe as written as as follows:

2.5 cups Batavia
12 ounces raw sugar
5 cups black tea (made with 5 tsp loose tea or 5 bags)
the peels of 4 lemons
the juice of 8
optional fresh nutmeg

Muddle the lemon peels with the sugar in a large-ish bowl and allow to sit for a half hour to an hour. Muddle again to recombine everything once a bunch of oil has come out. Make up the tea, strain, and allow to cool completely. Add all liquid ingredients (strain your lemon juice!) Stir to combine, and fish out your peels with a slotted spoon or somesuch. Serve on a big block of ice.

The yield as written is a little over 18 standard drinks (i.e. 0.6 ounces ethanol per drink), somewhere around 2.5-3 quarts of liquid, and is between 15% and 16% ABV. Depending on how grown-up your coworkers' palates are, some might find it a little dry, though it looks well-balanced to me.

The main problem I see is that that leaves you with about half a cup of batavia left over, which seems a shame. If it were me, I'd pitch in the whole bottle, measure the lemon juice in ounces rather than lemons (and use about 14 ounces perhaps), add one more cup of tea, and use a pound of sugar, leaving you with the following recipe:

1 bottle batavia
16 ounces raw sugar
6 cups black tea
14 ounces strained lemon juice
the peel of 4 or 5 lemons
optional fresh nutmeg

Remember, if you're not grating your nutmeg fresh it's better to just omit. Also, if you're going to be constructing this punch immediately before service (like, at the party) it's wise to bring along a little bottle of sugar syrup and a bit of extra lemon juice so you can adjust it right in the bowl if needs be.

Happy punching.

Kenning fucked around with this message at 20:56 on Dec 5, 2011

TapTheForwardAssist
Apr 9, 2007

Pretty Little Lyres

Kenning posted:

Okay so I haven't made United Service Punch before myself, but I have made many dozens of gallons of punch in the last year and I reckon I can read a punch fairly well on the page.

2.5 cups Batavia
12 ounces raw sugar
5 cups black tea (made with 5 tsp loose tea or 5 bags)
the peels of 4 lemons
the juice of 8
optional fresh nutmeg


Wow, great answer, and that does look quite classic. A couple quick questions:

- For the raw sugar, any particular recommendations? Should I get a hunk of jaggery and smash that up?

- So lemon is the classic, but for Christmas might it work to go seasonal and try either ruby grapefruit, or blood orange, or is that just a bridge too far?

- Any particular type of black tea that you've used in other punches and would recommend? Should I try and get clever and do most of it with some typical black tea but then add a little bit of one of the smoky black teas?

bloody ghost titty
Oct 23, 2008

tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

TapTheForwardAssist posted:

Wow, great answer, and that does look quite classic. A couple quick questions:

- For the raw sugar, any particular recommendations? Should I get a hunk of jaggery and smash that up?

- So lemon is the classic, but for Christmas might it work to go seasonal and try either ruby grapefruit, or blood orange, or is that just a bridge too far?

- Any particular type of black tea that you've used in other punches and would recommend? Should I try and get clever and do most of it with some typical black tea but then add a little bit of one of the smoky black teas?

Jaggery or demarara, stick to lemon, and try oolong.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Glad you like it! As to your questions, you can indeed use jaggery, but for most of my punches I just use demerara/turbinado. With jaggery you really need to render it into a syrup beforehand, and you can't do the whole bit about muddling the peels for the oil as easily. Jaggery and other super unrefined evaporated cane juice sugars will add a funky earthiness that is not unwelcome, and there are certain punches which drat near require it. This one could go either way.

As for the citrus, strictly speaking lime is a more traditional choice for 'rack punches. This one calls for lemon because in 19th century England, when it was developed, limes were considered unwholesome. I haven't yet made a punch soured with grapefruit, so I can't give much guidance there. I imagine you'd have to take care that it didn't get too pithy-tasting, which can be a problem with grapefruit, since then it would be bitter. Also I feel like grapefruit might work better with brandy or Jamaican rum.

Finally, I am not a tea buff, so I typically just use some Assam or Ceylon loose-leaf from my local grocery. It might be fun to do something fancy with some of the tea, but I would do like you said and use just a bit. You want your punch to be integrated in flavor, and not have the tea stand out too much.

Best of luck! And really, don't worry too much about your punch. Just taste as you go along and it's pretty unlikely it'll come out bad.

Klauser
Feb 24, 2006
You got a dick with that problem!?!
Made this the other night and enjoyed it:

Victorian

1/2oz elderflower liqueur
1/2oz limoncello
2 dashes grapefruit bitters
Bubbly
Lemon twist garnish
Build in flute and top with bubbly



Also on repeal day, I read about a Cherry Bounce. Inspired, I poured some of the liquid from my jar of brandied cherries into a glass to sip. I was dubious but I wound up really liking it.

Halloween Jack
Sep 12, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 8 hours!
Just in the past year I've been trying to set up a decent home bar, and the really annoying thing is that here in Virginia, all liquor has to be sold through ABC stores. The selection is not bad except when it comes to liqueurs. For many liqueurs there will only be a couple of options, and often it's bottom-shelf stuff with a lot of artificial flavouring. What brands do you recommend for common liqueurs like creme liqueurs? I'm planning to order some genuine Curacao de Curacao; are there places to buy online that you favour above others?

Also, do you have an opinion on Sirops de Monin? I am thinking about ordering several of their bottles so my cabinet can be free of cheap high-fructose corn syrup bullshit.

Halloween Jack fucked around with this message at 22:45 on Dec 9, 2011

Duey
Sep 5, 2004

Hi
Nap Ghost

Halloween Jack posted:

Also, do you have an opinion on Sirops de Monin? I am thinking about ordering several of their bottles so my cabinet can be free of cheap high-fructose corn syrup bullshit.

I've never used them, but I don't know how necessary they are. I make my own simple syrup, and I'll throw in different flavors to make specific syrups. Vanilla or strawberry syrups are good and they are easy and cheap to make. I went to the liquor store yesterday to buy some bitters and they had simple syrup for sale for 10$ when you can make it at home in 5 minutes for the cost of heating some water and throwing in some sugar.

Spuckuk
Aug 11, 2009

Being a bastard works



Halloween Jack posted:

Also, do you have an opinion on Sirops de Monin? I am thinking about ordering several of their bottles so my cabinet can be free of cheap high-fructose corn syrup bullshit.

I have a few bottles of Monin on my shelf, and they're very useful. the gomme syrup is far silkier than regular simple syrup..and the gingerbread syrup is pretty amazing for coffee.

Halloween Jack
Sep 12, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 8 hours!
I was interested in their gomme syrup specifically; do you know a vendor that isn't in the bloody UK? I can find domestic vendors for everything else.

Also, can anyone recommend good creme de cacao and creme de cassis?

bloody ghost titty
Oct 23, 2008

tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH
You can make your own gomme very easily if you can get a hold of gum Arabic. If not, a 2:1 simple makes a decent substitute.

For the cacao or cassis, Marie brizard makes a good version of each, but I don't know how easy they are to find outside of major markets.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Not easy at all.

branedotorg
Jun 19, 2009

Halloween Jack posted:

I was interested in their gomme syrup specifically; do you know a vendor that isn't in the bloody UK? I can find domestic vendors for everything else.

Also, can anyone recommend good creme de cacao and creme de cassis?

G E Massenez make the best range imo, significantly better than baitz, bols or marie brizzard.

Halloween Jack
Sep 12, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 8 hours!
Bols is better than DeKuyper, but still so drat artificial-tasting. I hate to use decent liquor, fresh lime, and real sugar and then adulterate them with something that tastes like the blue-flavoured whatever I drank when I was five. Thanks for those suggestions; I'll look into those as well as the Brizards.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Infuse your own spirits.

Halloween Jack
Sep 12, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 8 hours!
Look, if I wanted to "do tasks which require concentration" when I get home from work, why would I have a liquor cabinet? :)

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



You typically don't start your infusion and your cocktail at the same time.

Ernest Hemingway
Dec 4, 2009
Pffff, infusion is for amateurs. Real mixologists distill their own spirits. I've got a bathtub full of gin right now.

TapTheForwardAssist
Apr 9, 2007

Pretty Little Lyres
UPDATE: On United Service Punch (arrack-based) for an office party.

I whipped up a batch tonight, and the instructions given above about perfectly filled my 1.9 liter carafe. I have a second carafe, so depending on how this batch ages overnight will make another for Friday's party.

I did the recipe about as described; for tea I did four cups assam and two lapsang (smokier). I wasn't sure if you meant 6oz teacups or 8oz cups, so I think I ended up about 40oz of tea or so. I backed off slightly on the lemon juice (7 lemons' worth) and it seems about right. At first it seemed a little too sweet, but I waited perhaps a bit long on fishing out the lemon peels (just 15m or so), and they rather swiftly added some bitterness that about correctly balanced the taste out. Being a little bit light on lemon, a bit strong on lemon peel, and the tea maybe brewed a bit dark (not used to brewing 40oz in one go), it's a little bit astringent, so maybe a bit "adult".

I grated up one whole, small nutmeg, and it did a lot for the flavour. Unfortunately it gave a somewhat sawdusty particulate fluff to the mix, so I'm going to strain it through cheescloth once it's had time to macerate. I didn't strain the lemon juice either (I just wasn't convinced it was necessary), so some overall straining will be good for this slightly murky beverage.

I did go rather light on the arrack, maybe 1.5 cups, since it's an office party and technically they're letting us bring wine or beer, so I wanted something a little weaker so that it's in the general 9%ish ballpark. Though you can certainly tell it has alcohol in it; further, even at that reduced ratio, the arrack taste/funk comes through quite strong. I would almost say that the combination of flavours has, itself, many of the characteristics of arrack, so maintains a similar overall palate while being sippable, but perhaps that's the point.

I'm letting one batch age overnight, making another tomorrow, and depending what comes out they'll be indentical, or one drier carafe and one sweeter, or one will be better than the other and I'll blend.


In the meantime, I found myself with a bunch of squeezed-out lemons and liquor-soaked spare lemon peel. Life having given me lemons, like a good Maghrebi I've got them in a glass jar and coated down with salt as we speak. I'll let them bleed a few days, and since they're already squeezed I'm sure they won't fill the jar with self-juice, but I'll top them off with some pickling vinegar and leave them over Christmas, then feast on pickled lemon rind with some mashed fava and harissa.

TapTheForwardAssist fucked around with this message at 06:15 on Dec 15, 2011

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Cool, that sounds pretty good over all. I typically just grate the nutmeg directly on at the party and let people just drink it, since it mostly settles to the bottom of the bowl anyway. Sounds like you've got a good sense for balancing this sort of thing up. The instructions meant 8 oz. per cup, but what you did should be fine.

Hope it's well-received!

MullardEL34
Sep 30, 2008

Basking in the cathode glow
I've been loving my sidecars lately.
Current recipe:
1.5oz St. Remy XO Brandy
.75OZ of good quality triple sec
.75oz fresh lemon juice.
Goes great with a Chesterfield or other unfiltered cigarette of your choice.

MullardEL34 fucked around with this message at 07:39 on Dec 16, 2011

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Man that would taste so much better with even a VS cognac. Or, as I mentioned in another thread lately, Raynal if you can't bring yourself to spring for cognac. Also I can't imagine making a Sidecar without eggwhite.

Dilbert As FUCK
Sep 8, 2007

by Cowcaster
Pillbug
My room mates 21st is coming up, not a big liquor drinker but likes sweet stuff(he wants me to get him a case of mikes hard).

Can anyone recommend a powerful knock you on your rear end drink that doesn't taste like liquor.

bloody ghost titty
Oct 23, 2008

tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

MullardEL34 posted:

I've been loving my sidecars lately.
Current recipe:
1.5oz St. Remy XO Brandy
.75OZ of good quality triple sec
.75oz fresh lemon juice.
Goes great with a Chesterfield or other unfiltered cigarette of your choice.

This is my recipe, but I smoke filters and don't mix XO cognac.

DasNeonLicht
Dec 25, 2005

"...and the light is on and burning brightly for the masses."
Fallen Rib

Corvettefisher posted:

My room mates 21st is coming up, not a big liquor drinker but likes sweet stuff(he wants me to get him a case of mikes hard).

Can anyone recommend a powerful knock you on your rear end drink that doesn't taste like liquor.
It's nothing fancy, but I'd recommend Southern Comfort and cola. SoCo is pretty loving sweet (but tasty) and comes in a 100 proof edition.

Aw fuck.
Jun 30, 2007

Using Ubuntu
is awesome

Corvettefisher posted:

My room mates 21st is coming up, not a big liquor drinker but likes sweet stuff(he wants me to get him a case of mikes hard).

Can anyone recommend a powerful knock you on your rear end drink that doesn't taste like liquor.

Hell, whiskey sours are pretty great and easy as poo poo to make. Squeeze the lemons yourself (it's easy and it will taste like marinade if you use bottled), make the sugar syrup, and maybe experiment with some different whiskies. I always make it using 3 parts whiskey, 2 parts juice, and 1 part syrup and sometimes I use half lemon and half lime. poo poo's great.

Dilbert As FUCK
Sep 8, 2007

by Cowcaster
Pillbug
Thanks, I was wondering about any cocktails as well.

I bought him a bottle of greygoose and orange juice/lemonade

should be fine for him

Xandu
Feb 19, 2006


It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am.
French 75s might work. It doesn't taste like liquor, though it's also not particularly sweet.

1.5 oz of gin
1/4 oz of lemon juice
1/4 of simple syrup (or like 1-2tsp of sugar)

Shake it, then pour and fill the glass with champagne.

Very Strange Things
May 21, 2008

Corvettefisher posted:

Thanks, I was wondering about any cocktails as well.

I bought him a bottle of greygoose and orange juice/lemonade

should be fine for him
You can turn that screwdriver into a really nice cocktail, that's also fun to say, called a Harvey Wallbanger just by adding a splash of Galliano.

In the future, don't bother blowing $25 on a bottle of Vodka for someone that doesn't appreciate booze. The difference in flavor is extremely subtle, and mostly in the mind of the taster, when it comes to vodka. Good Vodka is supposed to taste like *nothing, and Schmirrnoff achieves that goal for :10bux: less.

*I happen to like Stolichnya though, as an exception. It has a buttery flavor I like in a Vodka Gibson. There are other expensive Vodkas that are supposed to have delicate botanical flavors, and are distilled differently, but I'm pretty sure Grey Goose is just an overpriced neutral Vodka.

HOWEVER. You should save the Grey goose bottle when it's empty so you can refill it with cheaper Vodka and look like a big shot.

Very Strange Things fucked around with this message at 22:16 on Dec 16, 2011

Ernest Hemingway
Dec 4, 2009

Very Strange Things posted:

You can turn that screwdriver into a really nice cocktail, that's also fun to say, called a Harvey Wallbanger just by adding a splash of Galliano.

In the future, don't bother blowing $25 on a bottle of Vodka for someone that doesn't appreciate booze. The difference in flavor is extremely subtle, and mostly in the mind of the taster, when it comes to vodka. Good Vodka is supposed to taste like *nothing, and Schmirrnoff achieves that goal for :10bux: less.

*I happen to like Stolichnya though, as an exception. It has a buttery flavor I like in a Vodka Gibson. There are other expensive Vodkas that are supposed to have delicate botanical flavors, and are distilled differently, but I'm pretty sure Grey Goose is just an overpriced neutral Vodka.

HOWEVER. You should save the Grey goose bottle when it's empty so you can refill it with cheaper Vodka and look like a big shot.

Grey Goose is a Western style vodka that is intentionally devoid of any character, whereas Vodkas like Stoli are Eastern style and have some character left over from the distilling process. But once you start mixing vodka with anything, any character it has quickly goes bye bye.

I'm all for filling 'premium' bottles with 'ordinary' vodka like Smirnoff. Screw Grey Goose though, Dan Akryod's Crystal Head vodka has the best bottle around:

http://crystalheadvodka.com/welcome

Halloween Jack
Sep 12, 2003
Probation
Can't post for 8 hours!
I am so getting that bottle. I hate vodka.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Sobieksi is better than Stoli or Smirnoff, but in general any of the big S vodkas (also incl. Skyy and Svedka) are about as fancy as you want to go because what the gently caress it's vodka you're paying for the water they cut it with.

Vegetable Melange posted:

This is my recipe, but I smoke filters and don't mix XO cognac.

St. Remy ain't cognac.

bloody ghost titty
Oct 23, 2008

tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH
There's a st remy now? I mean, I'd be the first man to suggest the beatification of Mr. Martin, but wow, that went fast.

TapTheForwardAssist
Apr 9, 2007

Pretty Little Lyres
CONCLUSION: re United Service Punch (Batavia arrack)


I ended up making 2x 1.9L carafes of United Service Punch for a Christmas party at our office in DC. Being a gov't office we can't usually have alcohol, but for the occasional party we get official waivers from on-high, and to my great pleasure the waiver explicitly said "wine, beer, and punch".

Overall reception of the punch was positive, in that I had people coming up to me unsolicited to talk about it, overhead other people telling folks to try it, etc. The carafe at one party went fast, but at a different sub-office they had just so much booze (including a desk-bar specialising in lychee martinis) that it went slower, so I took the carafe to a party of total strangers at the next sub-office, and after I gave a pitch for folks trying it out the room emptied my other carafe in short order.


I used more of less the recipe recommended in the thread, but I ended up using a little less lemon and sugar than recommended, used some lapsang tea for smoke, and mixed it a fair bit weaker (9%) to be more sippable for folks that aren't big into booze. A handful of folks had some negative comments, most of which dealt with the somewhat off-putting smell of the drink. They described the drink as smelling "strong", which a couple specified that it smelled very strongly "of alcohol" despite being quite weak, and a couple others I think it was just the smokiness of the lapsang and the funkiness of the arrack that made it smell a bit odd, or at least unlike most sweet drinks Americans like. So of those stating an opinion, the vast majority really liked it, so I'd call this an overall success.

Batavia arrack is a little on the pricey side around here ($26/750ml), so if I were making this more frequently I'd sub in something else. I think cachaça would serve admirably, being not quite as funky as arrack but having that nutty/olive-y taste. I haven't tried but would guess that some of your basic Latin American cane-liquors would be fine (Central American aguardiente, etc). For kicks I might try making one batch of the cheapest/easiest ingredients and see how palatable it is: cheap white rum, grocery store brown sugar, lemons, and Lipton or whatever shite teabags.

Made as a I made it, rough costs for a 1.9L carafe were about : $5 for (8) lemons, $2 sugar (they didn't have bulk turbinado so I had to buy a sealed yuppie bag), $2 tea, 50c nutmeg, $13 liquor = $22.50 for about (12) teacup-sized servings.


Overall a success, so I'll plan to make this in the future, but if I'm making it for any audience that's not discerning foodies, or not a particularly special occasion, I'll use a cheaper liquor to cut the cost almost in half.

Human Tornada
Mar 4, 2005

I been wantin to see a honkey dance.
I picked up some things on a whim and don't know what to use them in: plum bitters, cranberry bitters, hibiscus water, and orange blossom water.

I make different cocktails all the time and like almost everything but I just copy stuff from the internet so any ideas you guys have would be great.

Xandu
Feb 19, 2006


It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am.
You can make ramos gin fizzes with the orange blossom water.

Choom Gangster
Oct 29, 2006

Klauser posted:

Also on repeal day, I read about a Cherry Bounce. Inspired, I poured some of the liquid from my jar of brandied cherries into a glass to sip. I was dubious but I wound up really liking it.

We make our own Cherry Bounce at work. It's pretty simple and very tasty.

New menu came out this week, here's the recipe for my cocktail:

Hastings Cutoff

One High West Oat Silver
One home made "Double Black" Imperial Black IPA liqueur.
Half Aquavit
Half Maple
Pipette home made Citric Acid
Three to Four Dashes Fee's Old Fashioned bitters

Shaken to aggravate the remaining yeast in the liqueur and create a dense head. Served rocks with a big lemon twist.

Choom Gangster fucked around with this message at 01:07 on Dec 19, 2011

TapTheForwardAssist
Apr 9, 2007

Pretty Little Lyres

Choom Gangster posted:

We make our own Cherry Bounce at work. It's pretty simple and very tasty.


So basically you just soak tart cherries in bourbon with sugar for a 2-6 months?

Is it necessary for the sugar to be in the vessel during the aging process, or could I just soak cherries in bourbon for a while, and then add sugar to taste before serving? I'd just be concerned about it being too sticky-sweet.

Does the benefit of prolonged maceration max out after six months or so?

bloody ghost titty
Oct 23, 2008

tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

Xandu posted:

You can make ramos gin fizzes with the orange blossom water.

And how are your shoulders holding up?

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Choom Gangster
Oct 29, 2006

TapTheForwardAssist posted:

So basically you just soak tart cherries in bourbon with sugar for a 2-6 months?

Is it necessary for the sugar to be in the vessel during the aging process, or could I just soak cherries in bourbon for a while, and then add sugar to taste before serving? I'd just be concerned about it being too sticky-sweet.

Does the benefit of prolonged maceration max out after six months or so?

I add sugar to all of my liqueurs after the fact.

Vegetable Melange posted:

And how are your shoulders holding up?

It's not that bad making a Ramos. I'm at a consistent inch and a half or more of head outside of the glass on mine now.

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