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Criminal Minded
Jan 4, 2005

Spring break forever
You got any ipecac? Mickey, he swallowed twelve aspirin.
Did he overdose?
Well, no, it's just too much...

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jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.
If anyone's itching for some Seinfeld on demand, Crackle just released its app for Xbox 360!

Macaluso
Sep 23, 2005

I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG, BROTHER!
And so we danced
And I burned for her

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

She thinks I made her sick because I coughed on her doorknob, rubbed her stapler in my armpit and put her keyboard on my butt. Yeah, she's a whacko.

Chicolini
Sep 22, 2007

I hate cold showers. They stimulate me and then I don't know what to do.
Oh, come on, we all have intense malaise. Right?

Stare-Out
Mar 11, 2010

Last night I performed a pre-emptive breakup. Worked perfectly, gained Hand. Thank you, Larry David.

Chili
Jan 23, 2004

college kids ain't shit


Fun Shoe

Stare-Out posted:

Last night I performed a pre-emptive breakup. Worked perfectly, gained Hand. Thank you, Larry David.

Was she shocked / never saw it coming?

Stare-Out
Mar 11, 2010

She gave me the "We need to talk" routine, so I went for the P-E-B and it worked, even though it turned out she wanted to talk about something else entirely. But while before I had very little Hand, now I have absolute Hand and things are great.

Thankfully she's not really into Seinfeld, otherwise the jig might be up.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

True story: when I was 15, I didn't feel like going to school one day. I had seen The Postponement the night before, which I'd seen several times before, but this time I decided to try it out for myself. I made myself cry and somehow got out of going to school that day. I felt so accomplished. I then stayed home and watched Seinfeld all day :cool:

penis sandwich
Aug 28, 2004

have some pudding :)
If I like their race, how can that be racist?

The Finn
Aug 27, 2004

إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
I’m just saying there's a chance she may not have been enamored with your thoughts and feelings on manure

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

penis sandwich posted:

If I like their race, how can that be racist?

My father's gay!

Chili
Jan 23, 2004

college kids ain't shit


Fun Shoe

penis sandwich posted:

If I like their race, how can that be racist?

You know... You're not chinese.

Kull the Conqueror
Apr 8, 2006

Take me to the green valley,
lay the sod o'er me,
I'm a young cowboy,
I know I've done wrong
Alright, I'm CANCELING the father son picnic...I DUNNO WHAT HE'S GONNA DO WITH ALL THAT POTATO SALAD!!!!

thepokey
Jul 20, 2004

Let me start off with a basket of chips. Then move on to the pollo asado taco.

Kull the Conqueror posted:

Alright, I'm CANCELING the father son picnic...I DUNNO WHAT HE'S GONNA DO WITH ALL THAT POTATO SALAD!!!!

Boy that's a lot of potatoes!

Coffee And Pie
Nov 4, 2010

"Blah-sum"?
More like "Blawesome"

thepokey posted:

Boy that's a lot of potatoes!

Your whole building smells like potatoes.

neoboman
Feb 16, 2007
My girlfriend said 'We need to talk' once. The four worst words in the English language.

Except maybe 'Whose bra is this?'

I am hella PEEVED
Oct 25, 2007

Welcome to Earth.

Chili posted:

You know... You're not chinese.

So, we're just a couple of white people?

Pierce and Pierce
Jul 1, 2007
Murders and Executions
I guess... :geno:

esperantinc
May 5, 2003

JERRY! HELLO!

Pierce and Pierce posted:

I guess... :geno:

Wanna go to The Gap?

Pierce and Pierce
Jul 1, 2007
Murders and Executions

esperantinc posted:

Wanna go to The Gap?

Sure!

Chexoid
Nov 5, 2009

Now that I have this dating robot I can take it easy.

Stare-Out posted:



Thankfully she's not really into Seinfeld, otherwise the jig might be up.

We never should have started this jig!

It was good jig!

It was terrible! It was a terrible jig!

The Finn
Aug 27, 2004

إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
You think they have fleas there, don't you?

isnt that right
Dec 8, 2009

Oh Biff

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

T. Fine posted:

You think they have fleas there, don't you?

......no....... :ohdear:

Kull the Conqueror
Apr 8, 2006

Take me to the green valley,
lay the sod o'er me,
I'm a young cowboy,
I know I've done wrong
You really think you can manipulate that beautiful young woman like the half-soused nightclub rabble that lap up your inane :airquote:observations:airquote:?

personaljesus
Mar 30, 2003
OK, painful question of the day...

If you had to remove one of the 4 characters from the show, who would you choose so that it would ruin the show the least?

For me, it would be Elaine.

Macaluso
Sep 23, 2005

I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG, BROTHER!
I choose... not to run!

jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.

personaljesus posted:

OK, painful question of the day...

If you had to remove one of the 4 characters from the show, who would you choose so that it would ruin the show the least?

For me, it would be Elaine.

Everyone needs Jerry to bounce off, he's the most boring but thats because he's necessary for everyone else to work. Kramers the zaniest, but he makes every other character work so well, Kramer+Newman, Kramer plus Georges parents, Kramer with Jerrys parents, just goes so well. George makes the show, I guess Elaine as well although she has fantastic storylines, and she brings in the best supporting characters, no Elaine means no Puddy, no Peterman...

gently caress it, I can't choose.

BrainMeats
Aug 20, 2000

We have evolved beyond the need for posting.

Soiled Meat

personaljesus posted:

OK, painful question of the day...

If you had to remove one of the 4 characters from the show, who would you choose so that it would ruin the show the least?

For me, it would be Elaine.

Oh no. This is the show. And I will not have my artistic integrity compromised.

jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.
Love the Keith Hernandez episodes too.

"Dinner? Don't you think that's coming on a little strong?"

Well you know what I've discovered Mrs. Sokol. It's not so much the looking as the listening. I listen for work. And as I'm looking and listening I am also looking. You can't discount looking. It's sort of a combination. It's looking, and listening, listening and looking. But you must look.

jojoinnit fucked around with this message at 05:13 on Feb 3, 2012

Sash!
Mar 16, 2001


penis sandwich posted:

If I like their race, how can that be racist?

If this wasn't my son's wedding day, I'd knock your teeth out you anti-dentite bastard.

Role Play McMurphy
Jul 15, 2010

personaljesus posted:

OK, painful question of the day...

If you had to remove one of the 4 characters from the show, who would you choose so that it would ruin the show the least?

For me, it would be Elaine.

Kramer.

I SAID IT.

neoboman
Feb 16, 2007
I love Elaine but she's the only choice.

Sash!
Mar 16, 2001


neoboman posted:

I love Elaine but she's the only choice.

I trust Elaine, she is my friend.



yeah she could be replaced with Generic Woman #2. She wasn't even in the first episode!

Bring back Kramer's dog damnit.

neoboman
Feb 16, 2007

Sash! posted:

I trust Elaine, she is my friend.



yeah she could be replaced with Generic Woman #2. She wasn't even in the first episode!

Bring back Kramer's dog damnit.

Elaine has a backup group anyway. And in the backward episode Jerry said Nina (?) could step right in if something happened to Elaine.

Capt. Sticl
Jul 24, 2002

In Zion I was meant to be
'Doze the homes
Block the sea
With this great ship at my command
I'll plunder all the Promised Land!

neoboman posted:

Elaine has a backup group anyway. And in the backward episode Jerry said Nina (?) could step right in if something happened to Elaine.

Well, you had your summer me... remember Whitey Fisk? the guy who snuck you into Last Tango in Paris?

Philip J Fry
Apr 25, 2007

go outside and have a blast
Definitely Elaine, but then again she's the reason and/or the catalyst for a lot of the more dire situations that Jerry, George and Kramer end up in to begin with.

She belongs in that jail cell far more than the others, anyway.

myron cope
Apr 21, 2009

Capt. Sticl posted:

Well, you had your summer me... remember Whitey Fisk? the guy who snuck you into Last Tango in Paris?
So you never saw Last Tango in Paris? Too bad, it was erotic.

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The Narrator
Aug 11, 2011

bernie would have won
The Summer of George: holy poo poo these are some bad people. Just a year after shrugging off the death of George's fiance, the rest of the gang shrugs off George when it looks like he may never walk fully again.
They all belonged in that jail cell, except maybe Kramer :colbert:

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