GWS General Chat: Damn I feel like a boss when I have one in each hand.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > GWS General Chat: Damn I feel like a boss when I have one in each hand.

«‹›895 »

bloody ghost titty: Oct 23, 2008; tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

I helped toss a deaf mute from a friends bar in the east village...never change, new York.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 00:58

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 04:43

Jay Carney: Mar 23, 2007; If you do that you will die on the toilet.

AAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!Aaaaaaa!!!!!!!!

Kinda like that?

# ? Mar 28, 2012 02:18

Psychobabble: Jan 17, 2006

I havent seen it yet but El Bulli: Cooking in Progress has just popped up on netflix.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 06:05

CuddleChunks: Sep 18, 2004

Happy Hat, you're 5/5 in my book. :swoon:

Made my first French onion soup tonight thanks to tips from this forum. Oh my lord. Now to tweak and refine and guzzle it forever and ever. Thanks goons!

# ? Mar 28, 2012 07:15

bloody ghost titty: Oct 23, 2008; tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

Halalelujah posted:

AAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!Aaaaaaa!!!!!!!!

Kinda like that?

Uncomfortably close. The night actually got weirder from there.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 08:05

Happy Hat: Aug 11, 2008; He just wants someone to shake his corks, is that too much to ask??

Darval posted:

I feel like I've heard you complaining about work before Hat, maybe you should look at what else is available on the job market? Yeah I know unemployment is bad atm.. But doesn't hurt to look.

I am having too much fun to look for something different, it only hurts when we have to let people go, and when we have to cut cost..

A 4/5 is within the top-performer range, and about 10% of the people at the company get that rating or above, at my level it is less than 2%.

So it's all good, no reason to be unhappy!

# ? Mar 28, 2012 08:49

Dane: Jun 18, 2003; mmm... creamy.

I love good restaurant/service stories.

One of my best friends is in New York right now with his girlfriend and his mother, celebrating his mother's 60th birthday. They wanted to eat at The Sunburnt Cow, but when it was closed, a bartender suggested Edi and the Wolf. They went there, loved the food, raved about it to the waiter who pointed out that the man behind them was chef-owner Eduard Frauneder. That led to an evening of talking and drinking beer and wine (on the house) with him and Lisa Cosman and, when the topic of the birthday came up, an insistence that they eat a birthday lunch the next day at German House - on the house - with Edi and a ton of german diplomats.

poo poo like this happens to this guy all the time.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 09:25

dino.: Mar 28, 2010; Yip Yip, bitch.

Vegetable Melange posted:

I helped toss a deaf mute from a friends bar in the east village...never change, new York.

You really must come over some time for dinner, VM. Your stories alone would be worth spending an hour in the kitchen to cook you a meal.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 18:08

bloody ghost titty: Oct 23, 2008; tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

dino. posted:

You really must come over some time for dinner, VM. Your stories alone would be worth spending an hour in the kitchen to cook you a meal.

Hit me on the pm, I'll bring the wine once we find the time, and I am interested in this "veeegin" thing.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 18:31

Charmmi: Dec 8, 2008; :trophystare:

dino. posted:

You really must come over some time for dinner, VM. Your stories alone would be worth spending an hour in the kitchen to cook you a meal.

Can I get in on this party?

# ? Mar 28, 2012 18:34

The Macaroni: Dec 20, 2002; ...it does nothing.

We all have to go to dino's, but then when we get there insist that he serve us meat. A traditional Thanksgiving, y'know?

Joking aside, I would totally hang out with dino. (If invited. :ohdear:

)

# ? Mar 28, 2012 21:33

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

The Macaroni posted:

We all have to go to dino's, but then when we get there insist that he serve us meat. A traditional Thanksgiving, y'know? Joking aside, I would totally hang out with dino. (If invited. )

I am going to be in NYC in late June and was planning on going to the restaurant where he works, not that I know what it is. (That's what PMs are for, I suppose). I'll even wear one of my trademark floral shirts (Liberty prints 4eva)

Then I'd demand that he cooks meat.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 22:01

Scientastic: Mar 1, 2010; TRULY scientastic.
🔬🍒

The Macaroni posted:

We all have to go to dino's, but then when we get there insist that he serve us meat. A traditional Thanksgiving, y'know? Joking aside, I would totally hang out with dino. (If invited. )

The correct thing to do in that situation is to come prepared. When the meal is served, pull a bloody steak out of your back pocket and slap it onto the plate.

# ? Mar 28, 2012 23:35

GrAviTy84: Nov 25, 2004

I've eaten a dino food at the dino haus. Good stuff. He will try to fill you up on various veggies but then bring out the deep fried stuff later. Protip, hold out for the deep fried stuff.

not that the veggies and stuff were bad, they were very good.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 00:26

Toast: Dec 7, 2002; GoonsWithSpoons.com Generalissimo

That dinner sounded amazing too.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 00:28

CuddleChunks: Sep 18, 2004

I'm pretty sure the correct etiquette is to show up late wearing sweatpants and a stained wolfshirt along with your buddy and girlfriend that you've never mentioned until now. You need to comment loudly on how it's great that two homos can totally get married and poo poo and aint' that crazy how dem gays are like real people now. If you know any jokes that are simultaneously demeaning to women and people of different ethnicities then you should bust one of those out to break the ice. Since you brought your girlfriend it would be good manners to loudly mention how, "I ain't stickin my dick in no dude but man I wish I had married a dude that didn't bitch about leaving the seat up. Amirite fellas?" Hold your hand up high for a high-five and wait. If it's not answered, turn to your buddy, who has done nothing but sit silently and glower until now and they will "get you back". Your girlfriend should bray with laughter at your witticism.

Dinner is the most important part of the evening and to celebrate it properly you need to ask loudly for ketchup right at the start and then guffaw at your own joke. Comment on the color, texture and appearance of each dish. Anecdotes about not knowing the difference between curry and pig poo poo are most welcome. Please remember that your indoor voice should not change appreciably from your outdoor voice. If people don't hear you, how can they know how funny you are? Glowering friend should mutter something and start eating any bread on the table and only the bread. Girlfriend is advised to ask endless questions about every ingredient in the meal because she might have an allergy to common non-allergens.

I mention this in case you want to be excruciatingly polite but uttering the phrase, "Got anything *good*?" while stirring your meal around on the plate is considered the mark of only the most refined. It's not necessary for having a good time at a meal but you may want to keep it in your repertoire for special occasions.

Finally, the evening will end and you'll leave dino's house. If any alcohol was served earlier it behooves you to drink it as fast as possible so that you may be fully inebriated partway into dinner. Remember that as a guest you have certain, inalienable rights that transcend culture and circumstance. If at any time you don't feel that you are properly being catered to and that each whim is not met with a smile and prompt service it is considered appropriate to inform the host of this lack by commenting to your girlfriend. Indirect comments are the norm for any adult dinner party.

A backhanded compliment on your way out the door is the gracious way to end a dinner with friends. One option, "well, whatever that poo poo was, it was pretty tasty I guess. Good thing Taco Bell is 24-hours, amirite?" Laugh merrily and stagger to your car secure in the knowledge that you have comported yourself with all the dignity and good breeding one could hope for in a modern gentleman.

I hope this helps.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 00:39

dino.: Mar 28, 2010; Yip Yip, bitch.

Charmmi posted:

Can I get in on this party?

You're going to /be/ the party, Charmmi. Since I don't have PMs, maybe you can set it up with VM for when you're in town with Mr. Charmmi. :3

# ? Mar 29, 2012 00:52

GrAviTy84: Nov 25, 2004

dino. posted:

You're going to /be/ the party, Charmmi. Since I don't have PMs, maybe you can set it up with VM for when you're in town with Mr. Charmmi. :3

Aren't you two friends on g+ anyway, I remember hangingout with both of you at once in the past.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 00:53

bongwizzard: May 19, 2005; Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"; Grimey Drawer

dino. posted:

You're going to /be/ the party, Charmmi.

Well, we have been through Main Wife, Stripper pus, and Squashy's assorted perversions, i guess it is time for a GWS swingers group.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 02:01

wafflesnsegways: Jan 12, 2008; And that's why I was forced to surgically attach your hands to your face.

bunnielab posted:

Well, we have been through Main Wife, Stripper pus, and Squashy's assorted perversions, i guess it is time for a GWS swingers group.

I'll start working on an OP.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 02:13

bloody ghost titty: Oct 23, 2008; tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH

If its gonna be that kinda party, ima stick my dick in the aloo saag.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 04:44

OmegaBeard: Sep 13, 2010

You all heard Vegetable Melange. Keep away from the hot dishes.
Though I gotta wonder, which would be better at a GWS orgy, the food or the sex?

# ? Mar 29, 2012 05:08

Casu Marzu: Oct 20, 2008

OmegaBeard posted:

You all heard Vegetable Melange. Keep away from the hot dishes.
Though I gotta wonder, which would be better at a GWS orgy, the food or the sex?

The food by far, considering the conversations in here.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 05:15

Drink and Fight: Feb 2, 2003

OmegaBeard posted:

You all heard Vegetable Melange. Keep away from the hot dishes.
Though I gotta wonder, which would be better at a GWS orgy, the food or the sex?

Same thing, really.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 06:12

Drink and Fight: Feb 2, 2003

OmegaBeard posted:

You all heard Vegetable Melange. Keep away from the hot dishes.
Though I gotta wonder, which would be better at a GWS orgy, the food or the sex?

Your mom's a hot dish.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 06:12

bongwizzard: May 19, 2005; Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"; Grimey Drawer

I want to seal you in a plastic bag and submerge you in tepid water for hours.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 06:30

mindphlux: Jan 8, 2004; by R. Guyovich

CuddleChunks posted:

I hope this helps.

oh man people like this totally exist don't they.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 06:58

Steakandchips: Apr 30, 2009

CuddleChunks posted:

I'm pretty sure the correct etiquette is to show up late wearing sweatpants and a stained wolfshirt along with your buddy and girlfriend that you've never mentioned until now. You need to comment loudly on how it's great that two homos can totally get married and poo poo and aint' that crazy how dem gays are like real people now. If you know any jokes that are simultaneously demeaning to women and people of different ethnicities then you should bust one of those out to break the ice. Since you brought your girlfriend it would be good manners to loudly mention how, "I ain't stickin my dick in no dude but man I wish I had married a dude that didn't bitch about leaving the seat up. Amirite fellas?" Hold your hand up high for a high-five and wait. If it's not answered, turn to your buddy, who has done nothing but sit silently and glower until now and they will "get you back". Your girlfriend should bray with laughter at your witticism.

Dinner is the most important part of the evening and to celebrate it properly you need to ask loudly for ketchup right at the start and then guffaw at your own joke. Comment on the color, texture and appearance of each dish. Anecdotes about not knowing the difference between curry and pig poo poo are most welcome. Please remember that your indoor voice should not change appreciably from your outdoor voice. If people don't hear you, how can they know how funny you are? Glowering friend should mutter something and start eating any bread on the table and only the bread. Girlfriend is advised to ask endless questions about every ingredient in the meal because she might have an allergy to common non-allergens.

I mention this in case you want to be excruciatingly polite but uttering the phrase, "Got anything *good*?" while stirring your meal around on the plate is considered the mark of only the most refined. It's not necessary for having a good time at a meal but you may want to keep it in your repertoire for special occasions.

Finally, the evening will end and you'll leave dino's house. If any alcohol was served earlier it behooves you to drink it as fast as possible so that you may be fully inebriated partway into dinner. Remember that as a guest you have certain, inalienable rights that transcend culture and circumstance. If at any time you don't feel that you are properly being catered to and that each whim is not met with a smile and prompt service it is considered appropriate to inform the host of this lack by commenting to your girlfriend. Indirect comments are the norm for any adult dinner party.

A backhanded compliment on your way out the door is the gracious way to end a dinner with friends. One option, "well, whatever that poo poo was, it was pretty tasty I guess. Good thing Taco Bell is 24-hours, amirite?" Laugh merrily and stagger to your car secure in the knowledge that you have comported yourself with all the dignity and good breeding one could hope for in a modern gentleman.

I hope this helps.

This is a thing of beauty.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 06:58

Darval: Nov 20, 2007; Shiny.

Scientastic posted:

The correct thing to do in that situation is to come prepared. When the meal is served, pull a bloody steak out of your back pocket and slap it onto the plate.

I feel like I should try this at a vegetarian/vegan restaurant, and then tell the waitress "this tofu meat is super awesome", and watch the horror in her eyes.

CuddleChunks posted:

Gentleman's guide to dinner

And this is awesome.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 11:50

Scientastic: Mar 1, 2010; TRULY scientastic.
🔬🍒

Isn't the correct approach (to dinner at Dino's) to invite other members of your family, whine about how much you love meat and generally be such a dick about it before you go that you get un-invited?

# ? Mar 29, 2012 11:58

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

I feel bad for people who are so gung-ho about meat that they couldn't appreciate some good goddamn food without it.

I would eat a dino food.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 12:21

Happy Hat: Aug 11, 2008; He just wants someone to shake his corks, is that too much to ask??

Bertrand Hustle posted:

I feel bad for people who are so gung-ho about meat that they couldn't appreciate some good goddamn food without it.

I would eat a dino food.

Doesn't gung ho mean work together, or can do attitude?

# ? Mar 29, 2012 12:29

sweat poteto: Feb 16, 2006; Everybody's gotta learn sometime

Depends on context but generally more like overzealous or single-minded - inconsiderate of alternatives.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 12:35

wheatpuppy: Apr 25, 2008; YOU HAVE MY POST!

Happy Hat posted:

Doesn't gung ho mean work together, or can do attitude?

The literal definition is "work together" but in practice you can usually translate it as "very enthusiastic".

# ? Mar 29, 2012 12:39

Happy Hat: Aug 11, 2008; He just wants someone to shake his corks, is that too much to ask??

I thought it was a marines motto thing...

# ? Mar 29, 2012 12:41

wheatpuppy: Apr 25, 2008; YOU HAVE MY POST!

Happy Hat posted:

I thought it was a marines motto thing...

Originally it was. Some general or whatever borrowed a (mangled) phrase from Chinese to use as a motivational tool. "Hey guys let's work together and fight the bad guys! Hooyah! Gung ho!" etc. Then the meaning gradually changed over time, until it refers more to a sort of single-minded or aggressive enthusiasm.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 13:18

Wroughtirony: May 14, 2007

wheatpuppy posted:

Originally it was. Some general or whatever borrowed a (mangled) phrase from Chinese to use as a motivational tool. "Hey guys let's work together and fight the bad guys! Hooyah! Gung ho!" etc. Then the meaning gradually changed over time, until it refers more to a sort of single-minded or aggressive enthusiasm.

See also: Motarded, Motard. Portmanteau of "motivated" and "retarded"

It is also worth noting that between American military branches, coordinated group grunting is surprisingly sophisticated. The difference between "Hooah!" and "Oorah!" while phonetically minor, is actually very significant, to the point where using the wrong one is a serious social gaffe, akin to wearing a read shirt to a Crips party.

:themoreyouknow:

# ? Mar 29, 2012 15:51

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Wroughtirony posted:

See also: Motarded, Motard. Portmanteau of "motivated" and "retarded"

It is also worth noting that between American military branches, coordinated group grunting is surprisingly sophisticated. The difference between "Hooah!" and "Oorah!" while phonetically minor, is actually very significant, to the point where using the wrong one is a serious social gaffe, akin to wearing a read shirt to a Crips party.

:themoreyouknow:

Indeed, them Crips really hate reading. :xd:

# ? Mar 29, 2012 16:03

Mr. Wiggles: Dec 1, 2003; We are all drinking from the highball glass of ideology.

Happy Hat posted:

I thought it was a marines motto thing...

The Marines motto is Semper Fidelis.

Notably there is no linguistic confusion when we use Latin.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 16:25

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 04:43

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

Mr. Wiggles posted:

The Marines motto is Semper Fidelis.

Notably there is no linguistic confusion when we use Latin.

Although I believe it is often abbreviated to Semper Fi, which I am sure is not strictly correct.

# ? Mar 29, 2012 18:29

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > GWS General Chat: Damn I feel like a boss when I have one in each hand.

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