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Mnemosyne posted:I know it was a compliment, but since when has it ever been OK to walk up to a stranger and discuss their weight with them? You don't even do that with people you know, especially women. I got a lot of "wow, you're all baby" and a few "you can't get any bigger!" comments, and then at Walmart a week or so after my son was born I had a lady declare "Wow, you lost all that weight already? Great job!" - I don't think I knew her, and she didn't address me by name, so I guess she saw "slender woman carrying baby" and assumed. Correctly, as it happens, but what if I'd adopted my son?
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May 18, 2012 00:47
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I get comments about my weight from people I barely know all the time, usually patients at work or coworkers I don't know well. They say things like, "I can tell you're really watching your weight." I want to say "Not really, I've had concretes from Culver's twice this week already," but I try to remember they're just being nice. I guess. I don't know why it bothers me when people are essentially telling me I look good (for a while it was "You're barely showing at all!"). I guess I don't want anyone to think I'm one of those women trying to lose weight during pregnancy that's more concerned about stretch marks than the health of her child. I'm eating plenty (and gaining weight), I promise! Apparently pregnant women will get offended no matter what you say to them about their appearance. 
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May 18, 2012 14:22
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Maybe I looked like an unfriendly preggo? I didn't have random people touching my belly. It's not necessarily a universal thing, I guess. Babywearing is also great for keeping random strangers from touching your infant, too. They'll stick their hands in a stroller, but few people are willing to get all up in your boob-area to touch a baby. Very useful.
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May 18, 2012 14:59
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MoCookies posted:Maybe I looked like an unfriendly preggo? I didn't have random people touching my belly. Me neither, either time.
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May 18, 2012 15:08
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buttzilla posted:Me neither, either time. I actually nearly got touched last night at the drat taco store. Some old lady walked up behind me in line and grabbed my hair and told me how beautiful it was (GOD i hate that) and then when I turned around, she went for the belly. it was almost a twofer. I'm only ~4 months pregnant 
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May 18, 2012 15:28
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MoCookies posted:Maybe I looked like an unfriendly preggo? I didn't have random people touching my belly. It's not necessarily a universal thing, I guess. Babywearing is also great for keeping random strangers from touching your infant, too. They'll stick their hands in a stroller, but few people are willing to get all up in your boob-area to touch a baby. Very useful. I was also really concerned about random old ladies being all grabby on the baby in grocery stores, partially because I'm weird about germs, but mostly because I'm there to get my groceries and get out, not to have uncomfortable conversations with strangers (that's what I have the internet for!  )I was at the grocery store last week and saw a woman who had a baby inside a carrier in her cart, and she had draped the entire carrier with one of those thin muslin swaddle blankets. I kept an eye on her, and I didn't see anyone bugging her about the baby, so it looked like it worked. I think the idea is that you're signalling that the baby is asleep, so leave it alone, but I now plan to use this tactic regardless of whether the baby is asleep or not. And I never would have draped the carrier with a regular receiving blanket, because I would have worried about lack of airflow, or the blanket falling over the baby's face, but those muslin blankets are pretty sheer. I guess this only works until the baby is old enough to be making a lot of sounds and grabbing the blanket, but I have two baby-wearing devices, so I can just switch to baby-wearing at that point.
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May 18, 2012 16:24
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I wasn't shy about my kid being touched/handled by strangers from an early age and he's now a very social, independent kid and is not at all clingy. I have several friends who were very "hands off!" about their kids and now they can't leave the room without the kid freaking out. No idea if there is a correlation, but there you go.
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May 18, 2012 16:33
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VorpalBunny posted:I wasn't shy about my kid being touched/handled by strangers from an early age and he's now a very social, independent kid and is not at all clingy. I have several friends who were very "hands off!" about their kids and now they can't leave the room without the kid freaking out. That's more about personality, in my opinion.  I have an extroverted son and an introverted one and they were both raised the same way.Of course there are extremes. Like if I scrubbed his hands furiously after every encounter and told him not to touch people or let people talk to him and STRANGER DANGER!!!! then I'm sure that would have an impact but not wanting people to touch your newborn seems fine.
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May 18, 2012 19:22
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MoCookies posted:Babywearing is also great for keeping random strangers from touching your infant, too. They'll stick their hands in a stroller, but few people are willing to get all up in your boob-area to touch a baby. Very useful. I can only imagine how often my son would get touched if he were in a stroller, then! I've never seen anyone reach for him while my husband's carrying him in his carseat, but I carry him around in a mei tai and strangers grab for his feet like he's the statue of St. Peter in St. Peter's Basilica. That said, it doesn't bother me, since it doesn't bother my son if he's awake and so far hasn't awakened him if he's asleep.
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May 18, 2012 21:32
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Bleh, I just got back from spending 4-5 hours at the hospital because it turns out I'd been having regular contractions for at least two days, and just assumed that it was the baby moving around. I'm 34 weeks, and my cervix is completely fine, but the monitor showed I was having regular contractions about 4 or 5 minutes apart, pretty much non-stop. They pumped me full of two bags of IV fluids, hoping that maybe I was just a little dehydrated, but it didn't do anything, so they injected me with Terbutaline, which is used off-label to stop contractions. It stopped the contractions, and after 45 minutes of no contractions, they let me get up and go home, but basically as soon as I started walking again (I was laying down the whole time I was there), I'm pretty sure they started up again. I can't really tell 100% though, because to me they felt the same as the baby pushing outward. They feel so completely identical to me that even though I could watch them on the monitor, I kept telling my husband that I thought they were wrong and it was just the baby pushing on the monitor (yeah, I know it's dumb because I don't think a baby has the ability to figure out how to push exactly every 4 minutes). Then of course, the injection stopped them cold, so I had to concede that they were really contractions. So now I'm paranoid because I literally cannot tell the baby's movements apart from the contractions and I have no clue what I should do about it. I sat down with a timer and tried to time them, because I figured that would help me figure out if they were regular or not, but without some machine doing it for me, I really can't figure it out. I'm pretty sure the right thing to do is to go back to the hospital, but it's after midnight and I'm having a hard time seeing why I shouldn't just go to bed and see how I feel in the morning, especially since my cervix was absolutely not dilated at all.
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May 19, 2012 05:57
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Does your lower abdomen feel harder to the touch at all, then softer? That was the first sign of contractions/Braxton Hicks for me and was way easier than telling by feel.
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May 19, 2012 08:18
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Mnemosyne posted:So now I'm paranoid Any news? This actually happened to me, terbutaline and all. I could not tell I was having contractions - they were also not time-able because of this. I think I went in to L&D for monitoring 3 times and finally the 3rd time, at 39w4d I was 5cm dilated and they induced me. After that first trip to the hospital I eventually learned what a contraction sorta felt like, but when I was in actual labor they were so much different and so much more painful. Don't forget that you'll also be having some BH contractions. I ended up going on maternity leave (as per OB's orders) at around 36 weeks after the second time in L&D with contractions since I was on my feet all day at work and that wasn't helping at all. Also what Ben Davis said. 
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May 19, 2012 13:10
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I stayed home and went to bed, hoping that some rest would help, since I can tell that I have a lot more abdominal discomfort if I'm up and moving around. I guess it wasn't the worst idea because nothing terrible seems to have happened. I am up way earlier than I normally would be, and was feeling some discomfort, but this baby is big enough at this point that just him moving around is uncomfortable, so once again, I'm not really sure. I am finding that when I try to walk around it's frequently hard to stand up straight, since it feels like the muscles in my abdomen don't want to stretch out far enough, and that's not something I was really feeling before these past few days. I had Braxton-Hicks starting way back at like, 18 weeks, and I had no trouble identifying them, but these feel pretty different. Like maybe the BH were more surface muscles, and these feel deeper and more internal? I don't know, it's hard to figure out. I'm going to have some breakfast and then call the OB's office and see what they recommend. Last night the hospital wouldn't let me have anything to eat once I got there, which means I went 10 hours with no food, so my new policy is meal first, then hospital (if the OB says to go back.)
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May 19, 2012 14:26
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Lame. OB sent me back to the hospital where my contractions were stronger than last time, and 4 minutes apart. Not dilated, but the cervix is starting to thin a bit? Bonus ketones in my urine this time. Another bag of IV fluids and another shot of Terbutaline. After an hour of lying there with the monitor on, there were no contractions, so they sent me home on "modified bedrest." And of course, just like last time, I got about a mile from the hospital before the contractions started again. And once again, I just didn't have it in me to turn right back around and go back in, so I'm at home on the couch once again hoping that I can hydrate and rest them away.
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May 20, 2012 00:44
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Mnemosyne posted:Lame. OB sent me back to the hospital where my contractions were stronger than last time, and 4 minutes apart. Not dilated, but the cervix is starting to thin a bit? Bonus ketones in my urine this time. Are you working? If so, this might be the point where you'll start to hear your OB requesting you take an early leave.
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May 20, 2012 03:34
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buttzilla posted:Are you working? If so, this might be the point where you'll start to hear your OB requesting you take an early leave. No, I'm at home, fortunately. Well, not fortunate for our bank account I guess, but good in this case. When they saw me again today they were talking about how we needed to get this under control or else they were going to make me leave work so I could be on bedrest, but once they found out that I didn't work, I guess the treatment plan became more clear cut. As much as I don't want to be on bedrest, it's better than me going in there and having them inject me with Terbutaline again. That poo poo sucks. The amount of time I had left seemed so short, and now that I'm told that I can't really do much of anything for that amount of time, it suddenly seems like a long, long time. At least it's modified bedrest and not strict bedrest. I feel so bad for dumping all the household duties on my husband though.
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May 20, 2012 04:00
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I've been slowly gathering a variety of little things - shirts, pants, socks, singlets et al. At what point do you rip all the tags off and throw them in the wash? Did you do it soonish or wait until just before your due date? While browsing the baby aisles I've noticed these Gaia products around the place lately, has anyone used them at all?
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May 21, 2012 10:39
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iwik posted:I've been slowly gathering a variety of little things - shirts, pants, socks, singlets et al. At what point do you rip all the tags off and throw them in the wash? Did you do it soonish or wait until just before your due date? I usually wait until the 3rd trimester. I'm over 7 months pregnant and just did it the other day.
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May 21, 2012 12:55
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iwik posted:I've been slowly gathering a variety of little things - shirts, pants, socks, singlets et al. At what point do you rip all the tags off and throw them in the wash? Did you do it soonish or wait until just before your due date? With my first pregnancy I waited, and then I wound up having my daughter at 35 weeks and nothing was ready. My husband had to go home and build half the baby stuff and do some laundry while I was in the hospital so she'd have clothes to wear. With my second, I started hauling out the old baby clothes and washing them probably around 5 months, mostly because I felt like I should be doing something. They don't get dirty again waiting in a drawer. So, whatever works for you. FretforyourLatte fucked around with this message at 16:00 on May 21, 2012 |
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May 21, 2012 13:53
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Yeah, I waited till the last minute for some things and when the kidlet came right at 37 weeks my husband and mom had to do the same scrambling for laundry and crib assembly. Question: I've been looking for some pregnancy-okay abdominal exercises. Does this stuff look reasonable to you? http://www.progressiveparent.com/Pregnancy_postnatal_exercise/pregnancy-exercise-abs.htm I'm really, um, not an exercise person unless it's walking. But I'm kind of disconcerted by how early and rapidly everything is bulging with this second pregnancy. I know that's pretty common but I feel like my poor wimpy muscles could use a little encouragement.
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May 21, 2012 14:02
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I seem to have developed a charlie horse in my shoulder while i was sleeping. This really sucks. I went to the doctor about it since I can't really take or do the usual things I would do and when I get a strong enough spasm and my muscle is locking up as tight as possible it makes me cry. The doctor said the only thing I can really do is take Tylenol, use a heating pad, and lay down. Is there absolutely nothing else I can do? Laying down makes the pain go away, but I really don't want to waste a bunch of PTO on this and I can't just lay down and not do anything. Luckily I brought some work home to do, but I'm having a hard time sitting comfortably. Sitting feels worse than standing.
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May 21, 2012 19:19
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Alterian posted:I seem to have developed a charlie horse in my shoulder while i was sleeping. This really sucks. I went to the doctor about it since I can't really take or do the usual things I would do and when I get a strong enough spasm and my muscle is locking up as tight as possible it makes me cry. The doctor said the only thing I can really do is take Tylenol, use a heating pad, and lay down. Is there absolutely nothing else I can do? Laying down makes the pain go away, but I really don't want to waste a bunch of PTO on this and I can't just lay down and not do anything. Luckily I brought some work home to do, but I'm having a hard time sitting comfortably. Sitting feels worse than standing. This is probably not going to be a huge help, but I get a lot of muscle spasms in my shoulders and back area when I'm not pregnant. In addition to what you're already doing, make sure to stay really hydrated, sleep as much as you can, and try to not to stress out about stuff. If you weren't pregnant, I'd also say avoid alcohol and caffeine, but you're probably already doing those things. I guess worst case scenario, the muscle relaxer (Cyclobenzaprine) that they give me when my back and shoulder start acting up is considered Pregnancy Category B. I only know this because I took a dose before I knew I was pregnant and freaked out about it. Even though it's Category B, I probably wouldn't take any more of it than you have to, because it will kick your rear end (you probably won't be able to drive or work while on it).
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May 21, 2012 20:03
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That's good to know. The Dr. basically said if I'm still in pain in a few days to come back. I wouldn't drive on muscle relaxers, but I was able to do work at home earlier this year while I was taking dilaudids for a kidney stone!
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May 21, 2012 20:20
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Maybe look for a masseuse who knows pregnancy massage? I know the chain by me (Massage Envy) lists it on their website and it's pretty standard now.
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May 21, 2012 21:35
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hepscat posted:Maybe look for a masseuse who knows pregnancy massage? I know the chain by me (Massage Envy) lists it on their website and it's pretty standard now. I went to a Massage Envy a couple of weeks ago when my hips were at their most rebellious, it was for a prenatal massage, it was surprisingly comfy I kind of want another one but i have spent my discretionary money already this week.. and it's only monday. Good job, me!Went to my checkup today, heartbeat still there (a relief!), Dr. said I had gained the perfect amount of weight so far- shocking to me because I feel like I have been packing on pounds! Then we talked about my delicate skin and she told me that redheads (god only knows why) often have more delicate skin than others... so in a couple months she's going to give me some exercises/tasks to do to 'toughen up' my skin so there's hopefully minimal tearing during birth. (EW). She cracked me up though because she specifically looked at me and said 'You're a redhead, you can't fool your OBGYN about haircolor!' and I laughed However, because I changed from our old insurance to TriCare, we have to change doctors for the anatomy scan ultrasound. Is there a big difference between doctors/providers, say, or do they all use pretty much the same equipment for the same results? I rather liked the old scanning co. I kind of want to ask in here about episiotomies and anyone's experience with them but... I am not entirely sure I want to know the answers :/
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May 21, 2012 21:45
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Cathis posted:I kind of want to ask in here about episiotomies and anyone's experience with them but... I am not entirely sure I want to know the answers :/ Any women in your life that are around your mother's age should be able to tell you all about episiotomies, if you're comfortable asking. Every woman that I've talked to who gave birth prior to ~1987 tells me that at that time, episiotomies were routine for everyone! Actually, asking older women about their pregnancies is pretty fun and interesting in general. My husband has one grandparent still alive (I have none), and she asked me how many times I'd been to the doctor during my pregnancy. She was completely shocked when she found out, and told me that for each of her pregnancies, she went to the doctor ONE time, and then didn't see him again until delivery day.
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May 21, 2012 21:57
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Cathis posted:I kind of want to ask in here about episiotomies and anyone's experience with them but... I am not entirely sure I want to know the answers :/ I've mostly been a lurker, but I thought I'd share my experience. I had an episiotomy with my daughter and honestly, it wasn't a big deal in the slightest for me. I never felt any pain from it while healing, or at least no more pain than just some general soreness in the whole vaginal/perineal area for a few days after birth. It healed up really cleanly and my hope is that the area will stretch like normal when I have my next kid. I wouldn't get one as a routine procedure, of course, but I also wouldn't be scared of having to have one again after the first one.
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May 21, 2012 22:04
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Amelia Song posted:I've mostly been a lurker, but I thought I'd share my experience. I had an episiotomy with my daughter and honestly, it wasn't a big deal in the slightest for me. I never felt any pain from it while healing, or at least no more pain than just some general soreness in the whole vaginal/perineal area for a few days after birth. It healed up really cleanly and my hope is that the area will stretch like normal when I have my next kid. I wouldn't get one as a routine procedure, of course, but I also wouldn't be scared of having to have one again after the first one. Well that makes me feel a LITTLE better... the idea of having things.. done.. down there is not high on the list of things I'd like to think about, haha. The Dr, also informed me that I'm likely to be one of the women with stretch marks because of my non-stretchy skin but like I told her, I long ago came to the conclusion I'm never going to be a runway model so worrying about stretch marks isn't worth it
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May 21, 2012 22:18
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Cathis posted:I kind of want to ask in here about episiotomies and anyone's experience with them but... I am not entirely sure I want to know the answers :/ It's honestly something I'd ask your mother about. My mom had no issues delivering 4 babies and I found that I fell into that category, as well. I had a tiny internal tear from my daughter's shoulders on the way out, but other than that it was fine. Rather than worrying about the size of the baby itself, worry more about the head circumference if anything at all. However, my husband has a giant head and mine's average thus my daughter's was pretty average. My husband was also a huge baby (11 and a half pounds) and is a tall/big (over 6'1") guy and I'm short (5'2.5"). Again, average baby (7lbs 15oz). So don't let spousal statistics worry you as it's a crap shoot with babies. Ultrasounds can also be off although mine was mostly accurate when I had to go in for one at 36 weeks (they guestimated 7 and a half to 8 and a half pounds). Mine was probably more accurate because I went in later, anyway.There are other things to consider to help prevent tearing (but not guarantee). One being that the baby is in the proper position (face down, anterior) and another being that the nurses/your OB/husband really help coach you through the pushing. e: for lots of typos and missed thoughts. Pregnancy, ugh. bamzilla fucked around with this message at 22:53 on May 21, 2012 |
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May 21, 2012 22:43
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Redhead here. I had a 2nd degree tear that was really no big deal, I felt nothing even when they fixed it. I never even had to take painkillers afterwards. My doc doesn't do episiotomies.
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May 21, 2012 22:48
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Amelia Song posted:I've mostly been a lurker, but I thought I'd share my experience. I had an episiotomy with my daughter and honestly, it wasn't a big deal in the slightest for me. I never felt any pain from it while healing, or at least no more pain than just some general soreness in the whole vaginal/perineal area for a few days after birth. It healed up really cleanly and my hope is that the area will stretch like normal when I have my next kid. I wouldn't get one as a routine procedure, of course, but I also wouldn't be scared of having to have one again after the first one. This is exactly what my experience was. The only thing I felt during birth/immediately after was one needle poke when the doctor was repairing things and the lowest stitch down was just outside of the anesthetic's range. Afterwards, I was a bit sore but not in a lot of pain, and I stopped taking Tylenol shortly after I got home from the hospital. One word of advice: take the stool softener.
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May 21, 2012 22:49
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Cathis posted:However, because I changed from our old insurance to TriCare, we have to change doctors for the anatomy scan ultrasound. Is there a big difference between doctors/providers, say, or do they all use pretty much the same equipment for the same results? I rather liked the old scanning co. I would assume they all use pretty much the same equipment. I'm currently on TriCare Prime and I've had ultrasounds done in different clinics/areas of the hospital and they all used, what appeared to me at least, the same equipment. Personally I think TriCare is awesome but don't get your hopes up about them covering a breast pump. They have very specific rules on that - either you are the one on active duty or you have a premie. There might be other exceptions, but my midwife told me that they wouldn't cover it for most people. If you are close to a military hospital, look into the classes they offer. They are probably free (or at least they where I'm located). Breastpumps and nursing gear: I'm currently at 32 weeks and I am wanting to get this portion squared away. Should I get one beforehand? I'll be staying home full-time and I'm a bit mixed on what I should do. Also any recommendations on nursing bras and pads? I really need to start wearing pads.
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May 21, 2012 23:43
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ghost story posted:I would assume they all use pretty much the same equipment. I'm currently on TriCare Prime and I've had ultrasounds done in different clinics/areas of the hospital and they all used, what appeared to me at least, the same equipment. No military hospitals near here, just the VA.
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May 22, 2012 00:24
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I'd call the hospital and ask what kind of breast pump/nursing support they provide (even if it's not covered by insurance). When my daughter was born there was a program that let you rent one; we only needed it for the first month--really only the first few days while she was in the NICU and I came home. It came with a hand-run pump that we got to keep. Nursing bras--I find that I like the kind that clip up at the strap better than the ones that snap in the middle front. Those little bastards always spring loose, especially if you've got a baby carrier on you. Nursing pads--I liked the Lansinoh disposable ones. They were absolutely a necessity for a few months after birth, though eventually milk production settled down to where I wasn't really leaking.
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May 22, 2012 00:34
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ghost story posted:Breastpumps and nursing gear: Nursing Bras: If you're huge-boobed, try the Elomi soft molded bra for when you want to look and feel supported. It was Babble's best pick for big boobs, and I wasn't disappointed--it's got underwire and shapes nicely. The clasps need both hands till you get used to them, but it's so nice to have a bra that looks good under clothes. I'd get at least three or four sleep/around the house bras--those you can get now and they'll be fine for when your milk comes in, most likely. Then get your 'good' bras when you know what size you'll be. I like the idea of cloth nursing pads, but I leak so badly that it just isn't doable. I like the Johnson and Johnson ones for the price and comfort, but since they're not plastic-backed or gel-filled, you have to pay more attention to just how wet they're getting. Babies R Us brand is cheaper but every time you pull your bra cup down and back up, you'll have to readjust, and they look lumpy. They're ok for overnight or in the house. Lasinoh is my favorite--it doesn't leak and stays put. At they beginning, it might be worth putting a plastic sheet on your mattress or grabbing some of those disposable waterproof pads from the hospital to sleep on for a few weeks. I really wish I'd done the former and just put up with the crinkly noise. I would sleep on multiple towels and soak through my bra pads, nightgown, blanket, towels, everything. Also useful because if (when) your nipples are aching in those beginning days, it's nice to be able to expose them to air overnight. What else? Lasinoh lanolin is thicker and you have to smear it on, but it doesn't smell or taste bad. I thought Medela lanolin reeked, but it definitely glides on more easily.
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May 22, 2012 00:39
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If you're planning on exclusively breastfeeding, I would just get a manual pump for now, since if you have a problem early on, you'll probably want to rent a hospital grade pump (they're way better at helping to establish a supply than the consumer ones). You can figure out later on if you want to get an electric one.
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May 22, 2012 00:47
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I agree. I wouldn't invest in an expensive pump just yet. At least rent a hospital grade pump first and see how well you take to pumping. I think we were able to rent one for $50 for the first month. I managed to pump more from a hand-pump than an electric one and ugh.
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May 22, 2012 01:13
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I was a big fan of Bravado nursing bras (I am an E cup normally, went up to a G/H when lactating). Target carried a budget line of Bravado in store, they are were not quite as good as the non-budget version of Bravado, but much cheaper. Don't know if they still have them, a quick check of Target's website shows only the pricey ones ($49.00) per bra. You might want to check in stores, I remember them being about $20-25 each. Medela lanolin has additives to make it easier to apply (or at least it did 3 years ago when I was in the lanolin-buying years). I preferred the Lansinoh brand, it's 100% lanolin. If you rub it between your palms or fingers for a bit, it softens up and becomes really easy to smear on. I'd agree with renting a pump, at least for the first month. You can always make a determination to buy one later, or you may find that you aren't using it enough to make it worth your while to buy a double electric and save yourself some money in the long run.
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May 22, 2012 02:47
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Thanks for all of the replies! The main reason I was looking into breast pumps now was to find a way to keep my husband involved. He's going to be gone for work for long stretches at a time with no real guarantee on how much time he'll have back at home. I was thinking it would help him feel connected to the baby and have some non-crying time with her too. But waiting probably is the best bet. I'm definitely in the big chested club - but I don't think the small/medium/large bras are an option for me. Normally I'm a 32 band and the times I've tried bras/tanks with built in bras, they just don't work. I'm planning on getting sized close to my due date to get an idea on what cup size I should be looking for on Figleaves. Honestly the idea of spending around $30-$45 on a bra (based on my current guessing at what I'll be looking at cup wise) is something I haven't been able to do in years and is pretty exciting.
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May 24, 2012 05:13
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I'm a 32I nursing and the Bravado tanks are working great for me. They are on BabySteals every once in a while for half off. While I can definitely understand wanting to get your husband involved, it's generally best to hold off on introducing the bottle until your breastfeeding relationship is well-established. My husband took over the diaper changing, as well as making sure I was well-fed and well-watered; breastfeeding makes me incredibly hungry and thirsty.
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May 24, 2012 06:35
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