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SpiderHyphenMan posted:Holy poo poo. Holy loving poo poo. I love the onion when things get heated, like the "God Angrily Clarifies "Thou Shalt Not Kill" rule". They do well at making you laugh at the poo poo you can't live with.
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Aug 21, 2012 00:50
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More! MORE! Republicans Condemn Akin's Comments As Blemish On Party's Otherwise Spotless Women's Rights Record
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Aug 21, 2012 00:52
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:More! MORE! They're just going to loving town on him, and I loving LOVE IT.
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Aug 21, 2012 00:56
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:More! MORE! This is the best one. EDIT: Also the comments on the Onion Facebook page from people upset that they're not bashing Joe Biden hard enough and that the liberal bias of the Onion rages on. HackensackBackpack has a new favorite as of 01:14 on Aug 21, 2012 |
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Aug 21, 2012 01:00
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Aug 21, 2012 02:07
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Republicans literally think a little gaffe by Biden is equivalent to hate speech.
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Aug 21, 2012 02:19
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Leofish posted:This is the best one. The Republicans just wish they had a Diamond Joe of their own 
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Aug 21, 2012 05:40
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Joe's too busy doing sick stunts at the Vietnam Memorial to be involved in such horrific affairs.
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Aug 21, 2012 06:15
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Parents Don't Remember Enough Colors To Help With Kindergartner's Homework:quote:BEDFORD, NY—Parents of 5-year-old Haylee Risser reportedly sat around their dinner table stumped Monday night, unable to recall enough colors to help their daughter with a homework assignment from her first day of kindergarten. "I definitely remember red and yellow, but when she started getting into that brown and green stuff, that's where I'm lost," said Deborah Risser, 36, who admitted that shoelaces and days of the week were always more her forte. "It's one of those things they drill into you in kindergarten, and then you never use it again. When the hell am I going to need to know purple, anyway?" At the suggestion of her increasingly frustrated husband, Risser picked up the phone to call her older brother, who sources confirmed is "great at colors."
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Aug 21, 2012 19:32
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Ugly In The Morning posted:They're just going to loving town on him, and I loving LOVE IT. It really is wonderful and helps take the sting out of knowing this man is a legitimate contender for a leadership position in the United States.
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Aug 21, 2012 22:40
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AgentHaiTo posted:Whoa, this is some evil stuff. Jesus. This is it. This is the Onion article that is too hosed up for me to read.
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Aug 21, 2012 22:57
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Myanmar Ends Media Censorship Restrictive Voter Laws On The Rise It's a little jarring to see these two stories side-by-side in my news feed. I don't think it's a coincidence.
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Aug 22, 2012 16:51
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 Today Now!Country Artist Sings About Real America And Its Meth Addicts
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Aug 22, 2012 18:20
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2nd-Grade Teacher Can't Believe How Much Fatter They Keep Getting
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Aug 22, 2012 19:07
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Incredible post + avatar combination. (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Aug 22, 2012 19:20
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I know some Onion stuff is written to just be funny, but the fat kid article really missed an opportunity to exam obesity as the systemic class issue it is and not as a "hurr these kids don't run and just eat junk like their lazy parents". Like, at least have a line about school lunches or something.
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Aug 22, 2012 19:37
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Danger posted:I know some Onion stuff is written to just be funny, but the fat kid article really missed an opportunity to exam obesity as the systemic class issue it is and not as a "hurr these kids don't run and just eat junk like their lazy parents". Like, at least have a line about school lunches or something. Also, Poll Reveals You Live In Country Where Mentally Ill Man Still Has Good Chance Of Being Senator. SpiderHyphenMan has a new favorite as of 21:21 on Aug 22, 2012 |
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Aug 22, 2012 20:57
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I especially like the new rule for the state of Arboria!
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Aug 22, 2012 21:51
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Tampa Bay Gay Prostitutes Gearing Up For Flood Of Closeted Republicans Oh, Onion, never change 
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Aug 22, 2012 23:50
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Young Freud posted:Tampa Bay Gay Prostitutes Gearing Up For Flood Of Closeted Republicans
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Aug 22, 2012 23:55
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Zugzwang posted:This is literally not satire. Show me a horse that can do math and I'll believe this.
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Aug 22, 2012 23:57
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U.S. Military Sends A Few More Of Those Things Over To Afghanistan To Replace Dead Ones Absolutely brutal.
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Aug 23, 2012 01:25
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:U.S. Military Sends A Few More Of Those Things Over To Afghanistan To Replace Dead Ones quote:“After all,” he continued, “they’re just things.” 
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Aug 23, 2012 02:16
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Young Freud posted:Tampa Bay Gay Prostitutes Gearing Up For Flood Of Closeted Republicans The best is the marquee at the bottom. Kansas rules that evolutions must be taught by apes.
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Aug 23, 2012 02:45
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNdhFi3MHZQ Horrifying Planet shows us the positive side of our horrifying planet with help from Sky Energy. Also I keep laughing like hell at the end previews for Sex House when Frank talks about exploring each other's bodies.
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Aug 23, 2012 04:09
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:U.S. Military Sends A Few More Of Those Things Over To Afghanistan To Replace Dead Ones The Onion is beginning to transcend satire. It's amazing.
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Aug 23, 2012 05:02
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Women relived to find out her rape was illegitimate I deeply fear The Onion writing staff is going to off itself soon.
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Aug 23, 2012 05:15
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/mom-unaware-little-note-she-packed-with-sons-lunch,29281/ Jesus, that last line...
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Aug 23, 2012 06:36
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Smirking_Serpent posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/mom-unaware-little-note-she-packed-with-sons-lunch,29281/ I'm just waiting for the Onion to just collectively commit suicide soon.
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Aug 23, 2012 08:49
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The acting in Teens Hold Clothing Drive For Classmate Who Dresses Really Ugly was so dead-on it was almost painful at times
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Aug 23, 2012 12:11
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tacodaemon posted:The acting in Teens Hold Clothing Drive For Classmate Who Dresses Really Ugly was so dead-on it was almost painful at times Those are "Meghan and Katie," recurring charaters on Today Now. Here's another: Missing Teen's Friends Go On TV To Plead For Her Release, Gossip About Ugly Classmates
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Aug 23, 2012 22:53
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Hey, The Onion isn't all horrific stuff
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Aug 23, 2012 23:11
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Sex House Episode 7
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Aug 23, 2012 23:50
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Well, they certainly are committed to making each episode more disturbing than the one before.
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Aug 23, 2012 23:58
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I still love the Today Now! with the 5-year-old writer of Fast Five. http://www.theonion.com/video/today-now-interviews-the-5yearold-screenwriter-of,20188/ "The cars go fast and then they explode!"
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Aug 24, 2012 00:40
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Senior Woodchuck posted:Well, they certainly are committed to making each episode more disturbing than the one before. I have no idea how it can not end in on-camera murder suicide at this rate.
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Aug 24, 2012 00:49
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Brother Jonathan posted:Those are "Meghan and Katie," recurring charaters on Today Now. Here's another: Missing Teen's Friends Go On TV To Plead For Her Release, Gossip About Ugly Classmates Courtney Baxter, the actress who plays girl bully extraordinaire Meghan, was actually the guest of honor at an anti-bullying event last year (wearing her crown as "Miss National Sweetheart", an actual not-made-up teen beauty pageant she won): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueefNQobr44 On her YouTube channel, she also posted some of the videos of her and Jessica Rothenberg at the Teen Choice Awards "interviewing" celebrities in character as Meghan and Katie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0p95xTUcIKM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAnC06v9_1g
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Aug 24, 2012 05:40
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Are those supposed to look super fake? Did they actually do this or was it all staged?
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Aug 24, 2012 06:13
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God I fucking love Diablo 3 gold, it even paid for this shitty title
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In light of what happened this morning, The Onion just changed one of their headlines:
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Aug 24, 2012 15:58
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I think that's the first update I've ever seen.
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Aug 24, 2012 16:06
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