Movie Posters - The good, the bad & the awful

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > Movie Posters - The good, the bad & the awful

Rahonavis: Jan 11, 2012; "Clevuh gurrrl..."

A human heart posted:

I really dig how in this poster the shark is no longer menacing the swimmer as in the original Jaws poster, but is charging forward into the camera to attack the audience.

And somehow, the things that bother me the most are that (a) sharks aren't dinosaurs dammit and (b) would it have killed them to use a shark skull in the logo?

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

Man, that movie would've been so much better in it's earlier form. It was called Crood Awakening, and the initial screenplay was done by John Cleese and it was supposed to a stop-motion film done by Aardman.

I do remember hearing a very long time ago about an Aardman animated film about prehistoric people that would have somehow explained why the English and the French don't get along. Didn't know that it had mutated into "The Croods".

# ? Jan 28, 2013 22:54

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 26, 2024 07:41

Zedd: Jul 6, 2009; I mean, who would have noticed another madman around here?

Lobok posted:

It's pretty ballsy of Dreamworks to use the movie's fake caveman language all over the actual poster.

I'm not sure if this is me falling for the joke but here goes:
It's in Dutch; "The Croods" "27th of March" "Rebellious adolescent Iep"

# ? Jan 28, 2013 22:58

Byzantine: Sep 1, 2007

Rahonavis posted:

And somehow, the things that bother me the most are that (a) sharks aren't dinosaurs dammit and (b) would it have killed them to use a shark skull in the logo?

Sharks don't have skulls.

# ? Jan 28, 2013 23:13

Red Bones: Aug 9, 2012; "I think he's a bad enough person to stay ghost through his sheer love of child-killing."

Byzantine posted:

Sharks don't have skulls.

Did you think their heads just magically remained in the same shape?

# ? Jan 28, 2013 23:44

kiimo: Jul 24, 2003

Glad to know shark skulls are just as terrifying as the rest of their bodies.

# ? Jan 28, 2013 23:51

DNS: Mar 11, 2009; by Smythe

flashy_mcflash posted:

Oh my god, they changed the name. I saw this flick when it was called Vs (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1836212/) and it sucks So. Hard.

The Q&A featured the director bragging about James Remar being a family friend and only doing this movie because of that, if that's any indication of the sort of person that would make this film.

Haha. What was the movie about/like?

# ? Jan 28, 2013 23:53

Moongrave: Jun 19, 2004; Finally Living Rent Free

Red Bones posted:

Did you think their heads just magically remained in the same shape?

Skulls are made of bone, that's cartilage.

Trust me, being one myself, I am an expert on skulls.

# ? Jan 28, 2013 23:57

teagone: Jun 10, 2003; That was pretty intense, huh?

OLIVIAS WILDE RIDER posted:

Skulls are made of bone, that's cartilage.

Trust me, being one myself, I am an expert on skulls.

Google defines a skull as a framework of bone or cartilage enclosing the brain of a vertebrate.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 00:01

tliil: Jan 13, 2013

OLIVIAS WILDE RIDER posted:

Skulls are made of bone, that's cartilage.

Trust me, being one myself, I am an expert on skulls.

Oh come on, that's just seamantics.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 00:15

Moongrave: Jun 19, 2004; Finally Living Rent Free

teagone posted:

Google defines a skull as a framework of bone or cartilage enclosing the brain of a vertebrate.

Who are you going to believe? A robot, or a real life skull? :colbert:

# ? Jan 29, 2013 00:23

Peanut President: Nov 5, 2008; by Athanatos
(and can't post for 8 days!)

Bone fossilizes, cartilage doesn't. So as far as JURASSIC SHARK goes, it wouldn't be a skull, it'd just be teeth.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 00:29

King Vidiot: Feb 17, 2007; You think you can take me at Satan's Hollow? Go 'head on!

Zedd posted:

It's in Dutch...

The funny thing is that I recognized it as Dutch, so I assumed that "Croods" and "Iep" were Dutch words because they look like them.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 00:47

Rahonavis: Jan 11, 2012; "Clevuh gurrrl..."

All this because I was arguing with myself on all these exact points ("Is it called something special if it's made of cartilage?") and finally said, "gently caress it, I'm calling it a skull!" :ohdear:

Anyway, have some dubious live-action Disney movies:

# ? Jan 29, 2013 00:48

SALT CURES HAM: Jan 4, 2011

Rahonavis posted:

Talk about wavy hair

# ? Jan 29, 2013 01:04

Bloody Hedgehog: Dec 12, 2003; 💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

tliil posted:

Oh come on, that's just seamantics.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 01:11

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD: Sep 14, 2007; everything is yours

Rahonavis posted:

Two faces you just want to slap the hell out of.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 01:15

Tardcore: Jan 24, 2011; Not cool enough for the Spider-man club.

Rahonavis posted:

I'm actually a little offended by them comparing Bill & Ted to whatever this is.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 02:06

Darthemed: Oct 28, 2007; "A data unit?
For me?"; College Slice

Rahonavis posted:

That tagline always bugged me. What's so 'unlikely' about the comic duo of Bill & Ted?
:goonsay:

# ? Jan 29, 2013 02:18

achillesforever6: Apr 23, 2012; psst you wanna do a communism?

Hey now Operation Dumbo Drop was great, especially when I grew up and realized who they got to act in that movie.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 04:25

CPFortest: Jun 2, 2009; Did you not pour me out like milk, and curdle me like cheese?

"Rahonavis posted:

I owned the Black Cauldron when I was a kid, and it had a trailer for this on the VHS. This is literally the first time I've seen something related to "Meet the Deedles" in over a decade.

CPFortest fucked around with this message at 04:30 on Jan 29, 2013

# ? Jan 29, 2013 04:27

scary ghost dog: Aug 5, 2007

Rahonavis posted:

Is this a prequel to Point Break?

# ? Jan 29, 2013 04:31

Carly Gay Dead Son: Aug 27, 2007; Bonus.

Rahonavis posted:

I love this at least partially because that poo poo is neither how water nor hair works. To my great shame and wonder, whenever someone mentions Meet the Beatles, this right here is what I immediately think of.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 04:35

Hemingway To Go!: Nov 10, 2008; im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i'll always Respect my enemys.
- ernest hemingway

Peter Jackson's Meet the Feebles is also brought to mind.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 04:39

SALT CURES HAM: Jan 4, 2011

Darthemed posted:

What's so 'unlikely' about the comic duo of Bill & Ted?

In hindsight, Keanu Reeves being tolerable.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 04:43

Dr. Killjoy: Oct 9, 2012

GonSmithe posted:

So I was browsing blu-ray.com's new reviews and I see this monstrosity:

For a minute I was wondering if someone ripped off the concept behind The Boys, but it turns out it's a terrible genre mix of Saw I guess?

# ? Jan 29, 2013 07:32

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

Very loosely speaking if someone is making a joke about superheroes and their first go-to is Adam West-style Batman anything, odds are it's going to be a bad joke. Even Kick-rear end had the wisdom to go with a Spider-man riff up front.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 08:01

The MSJ: May 17, 2010

mind the walrus posted:

Very loosely speaking if someone is making a joke about superheroes and their first go-to is Adam West-style Batman anything, odds are it's going to be a bad joke. Even Kick-rear end had the wisdom to go with a Spider-man riff up front.

And while there is an Adam-West-Batman character, he's a supporting role played by Nicolas Cage. So he's becomes the best character of the movie instead.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 08:15

marshmallow creep: Dec 10, 2008; I've been sitting here for 5 mins trying to think of a joke to make but I just realised the animators of Mass Effect already did it for me

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:

Two faces you just want to slap the hell out of.

Oh, oh, I recently learned the German word for this: "Backpfeifengesicht!" Thanks, Cracked!

Man, so that was Paul Walker in the 90's, huh? The years have been nothing but kind to him, especially considering he's pushing 40 now.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 14:57

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD: Sep 14, 2007; everything is yours

Yonic Symbolism posted:

Peter Jackson's Meet the Feebles is also brought to mind.

Also, Meet the Applegates.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 15:59

flashy_mcflash: Feb 7, 2011

DNS posted:

Haha. What was the movie about/like?

It was a bizarre, unfocused mishmash of found footage, horror, Kick-rear end, and Chronicle, while never actually living up to the potential of any of that. It honestly felt like the 'You know what would be cool?' school of filmmaking where they just tried to shoehorn everything they liked into the script with no regard for whether or not it'd fit with the story they were telling. Absolutely not worth your time.

e: also a lot of the 'reviews' and comments on the imdb page read like the director/crew wrote them.

Actually, as I say it, you know who the writer/director/star reminded me of, in terms of his motivation to make the film and ownership over the project? That Tony Tango guy.

flashy_mcflash fucked around with this message at 16:09 on Jan 29, 2013

# ? Jan 29, 2013 16:07

Red_Museum: Apr 17, 2011; Shredded Hen

Unusual to have the poster credit in the centre of the poster, I think?

# ? Jan 29, 2013 20:16

Slim Killington: Nov 16, 2007; I SAID GOOD DAY SIR

Red_Museum posted:

Unusual to have the poster credit in the centre of the poster, I think?

That's because it's actually two posters and they couldn't make up their mind which to keep, so we get a top with no bottom and a bottom with no top. Throw the text in the middle, no one will notice!

# ? Jan 29, 2013 20:18

Physical: Sep 26, 2007; by T. Finninho

Red_Museum posted:

Unusual to have the poster credit in the centre of the poster, I think?

Ryan Gosling is the in freaking everything this year. And they all look good, or at least interesting enough to check out.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 20:20

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD: Sep 14, 2007; everything is yours

Why does Bradley Cooper look like Ralph Fiennes there?

# ? Jan 29, 2013 20:25

Dillbag: Mar 4, 2007; Click here to join Lem Lee in the Hell Of Being Cut To Pieces; Nap Ghost

And why does it look like they purposely made his ear bigger?

# ? Jan 29, 2013 20:42

flashy_mcflash: Feb 7, 2011

There's like a weird Ear Human Centipede going on in that poster. I can't unsee it now.

# ? Jan 29, 2013 20:59

wyoming: Jun 7, 2010; Like a television
tuned to a dead channel.

Red_Museum posted:

Unusual to have the poster credit in the centre of the poster, I think?

A motorcycle stunt rider turns to robbing banks as a way to provide for his lover and their newborn child, a decision that puts him on a collision course with an ambitious rookie cop navigating a department ruled by a corrupt detective.

Well I'm down.