JosephWongKS posted:

CONTEST TIME!

As recompense for dragging you guys through what promised to be an action-packed superhero gamebook but turned out to be the writer's terrible Livejournal soft-core romance fanfic, I hereby subject myself to reading a terrible book or fanfic of your choice and posting my chapter-by-chapter review of the book / fanfic in The Book Barn sub-forum.


How you can take part

To participate in the contest, write an ending for Heroes Rise in the style that has been inflicted on us so far. You may freely include characters / story elements that have been covered in this thread so far, as well as any additional characters and/or story elements of your choice. I will pick the most cringe-worthy one and the person who submitted that entry will get the reward described below.

The deadline for submissions is next Friday (1 February 2013).


Reward

The winner of this contest gets to pick a published book or a fanfic uploaded on a public site of his choice, and I will read the book and post a chapterly review at least twice a week on The Book Barn sub-forum.

If the winner picks a published book, the book must be available for purchase from Amazon.com, cost less than USD 30 on Amazon.com, be written in the English language, and of a shorter length than War & Peace.

If the winner picks a fanfic, the fanfic must be uploaded on a publicly accessible site (e.g. fanfiction.net, as opposed to a locked private blog), be written in the English language, and of a shorter length than War & Peace.

JosephWongKS posted:

EagerSleeper, I hereby declare you the Winner of the Contest!


Your prize

The winner of this contest gets to pick a published book or a fanfic uploaded on a public site of his choice, and I will read the book or fanfic and post a chapterly review at least twice a week on The Book Barn sub-forum.

If the winner picks a published book, the book must be available for purchase from Amazon.com, cost less than USD 30 on Amazon.com, be written in the English language, and of a shorter length than War & Peace.

If the winner picks a fanfic, the fanfic must be uploaded on a publicly accessible site (e.g. fanfiction.net, as opposed to a locked private blog), be written in the English language, and of a shorter length than War & Peace.

I will read and review anything you choose that meets the above criteria, up to and including Pokegirls fanfiction. Please don't make me read Pokegirls fanfiction.

EagerSleeper posted:

I will never make you read Pokegirls fanfiction.


I'd like to thank you for the great honor you have given me, and for allowing me to choose your next story to be read. I am proud to announce the next story I'd like you to see. It's an Amazon ebook called Twisted! by Miranda Leek. I hope it will be up to your caliber and standards, and that goons may find it interesting.

quote:

http://www.amazon.com/Twisted-Miranda-Leek/dp/1452006210/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1359774262&sr=8-1&keywords=twisted+miranda+leek posted:

Book Description
Publication Date: May 26, 2010

What Happens To Amusement Park Rides Once They Are Put Into Storage Or Destroyed? They are magically transported to a place only know as "Amusement Park Between", a park that co-exist within any other and is only accessible by those who are of its blood. There are no limits and no humans. The only residents are the RIDES. However, they are much different from our own. Amusement Park Between's rides are ALIVE, having both the characteristics of man and beast. Amusement Park Between was once merry and joyous, but for the past several years it has spiraled into turmoil. An evil tyrant known as Ironwheel has taken control, casting a dark shadow over Amusement Park Between, and whose evil intensions endanger both their world and our own. The rides only hope is the key to their prophecy, "The Red Will Defeat The Black". That perticular key is the only ride that was created differently. The red roller coaster, Railrunner. And This Is His Story.

http://www.amazon.com/Twisted-Miranda-Leek/dp/1452006210/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1359774262&sr=8-1&keywords=twisted+miranda+leek posted:

About the Author

Miranda Leek lives in the small town of Rockvale, Tennessee. Her love of art, writing, and roller coasters inspired Miranda, at the tender age of seventeen, to write Twisted; in which started as a simple experience and a few ideas, tuned into wonderful fully illustrated book that could be read over and over. Please visit https://www.mirandasmagic.com to view more of Miranda's work including the works of Twisted in their original form. Also Be On The Lookout For Book 2 In The Twisted Saga: VERTIGO

http://www.amazon.com/Twisted-Miranda-Leek/dp/1452006210/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1359774262&sr=8-1&keywords=twisted+miranda+leek posted:

14 of 16 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Twisted is a singular work March 14, 2011
By based demi god on deck

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

I'm unsure as to how much paint one needs to huff to come up with the idea that anthropomorphizing an amusement park attraction is a suitable concept for a 'novel' (used in the loosest of senses here), but it's probably the same amount or more that is required to enjoy this book.

http://www.amazon.com/Twisted-Miranda-Leek/dp/1452006210/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1359774262&sr=8-1&keywords=twisted+miranda+leek posted:

9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Why was this thing published? August 24, 2012
By Alice

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

I first came upon this book after I saw the various concept drawing this author posted on DeviantArt and being intrigued. I thought it would be at very least enjoyable, if not actually good. I was wrong. This book is horrible, and I mean horrible, featuring shoddy writing, a cast of some of the most unlikable characters this side of the Twilight series, and a "plot" that's little more than a list of cliches cobbled together in the semblance of a narrative. Even the original draw (cute talking roller coasters) quickly gets undermined by how bad the entirety of the book is.

---

It's painfully obvious that this story was never edited or even proofread, as it's absolutely full of spelling and grammar errors. Just to cite one example, the author consistently spells "through" as "trough." A full list of all the mistakes would take me forever, but it's no exaggeration to say that I've read amateur fanfiction that had much better writing than this.

---

So, for those of you who were led here by the author's DA page, this is your warning: do not read this book. This book is not worth your money, it's not worth your time, and she had no business publishing it and making anyone pay money to read it. It wouldn't even pass muster in a free creative-writing workshop!

Blurb posted:

WHAT HAPPENS TO AMUSEMENT PARK RIDES ONCE THEY ARE PUT INTO STORAGE OR DESTROYED?

They are magically transported to a place only known as “Amusement Park Between”, a park that co-exist [sic] within any other and is only accessible b those who are of its blood. There are no limits and no humans. The only residents are the rides. However, they are much different from our own. Amusement Park Between’s Rides are ALIVE, having both the characteristics of man and beast.

Amusement Park Between was once merry and joyous, but for the past several years it has spiraled into turmoil. An evil tyrant known as Ironwheel has taken control, casting a dark shadow over Amusement Park Between, and whose evil intensions [sic] endanger both their world and our own. The rides [sic] is the key to their prophecy; the red will defeat the black. That particular key is the only ride that was created differently. The red roller coaster, Railrunner.

AND THIS IS HIS STORY.

Acknowledgments posted:

For my Mom, Dad and my little sister Stitch, for always keeping the ride entertaining.

And for the roller coasters giving me the inspiration.

quote:

TWISTED
1: to turn so as to face in another direction.
2. To alter the normal aspect of; contort.

Prologue posted:

Behind Iron Bars

Pacing, back and forth from, corner to corner over and over again. As a caged bird waiting to be released. His mind was furious as his wheels made their click clack sound across the iron floor. His fire like eyes [JWKS: Note - not “fire-like eyes”, but “fire like eyes”] burned in rage. Thoughts flooded through him.

“Why! Why me!” The words screamed inside his head.

His restraints started to vibrate in anger as he sliced one of his dagger-like claws into the concrete wall. He pulled back his lips and snarled in frustration as he inscribed hateful words. He shook his head from side to side abruptly trying to overcome the continuing thoughts, ones that sickened him; bringing him closer to the breaking point.

“If I had never met that old man, if I never tried to work for that park! If I never would have –“

He banged his head against the bars and roared in pure rage. He tried not to think, but his will to not do so failed.

“Trapped in this prison! Because of my curse! Where I am from! BECAUSE OF WHAT I AM!!!”

quote:

He tried not to think, but his will to not do so failed.

quote:

“This is just great!” I said as I slapped a handful of bills onto the table. All those unwanted slips of paper kept piling up, bills from the electric, water, and who knew what else. Everything seemed to be spiraling into a bottomless pit as the miserable minutes ticked by, forcing me to lose myself in my sea of misery that looked like it would never dry out.

All had shifted right after I got fired from my engineering job at the city’s local cake factory. I remembered the moment well, my boss calling me to his office for some reason unknown only to tell me those four words: Rodney Philips you’re fired! It turned out that I never did wrong; the factory had gone bankrupt making everyone lose their jobs. Now every ex employee [sic] was looking hopelessly for work, I included.

I sat at my kitchen table drinking a cup of coffee and munching on a donut. As I took a sip I scanned the newspaper in front of me looking for a new job like I had done for the past five weeks. Every listing was either lousy pay or simply not what I had I mind. I knew I wanted something that I could relate to very well. A job that I would be comfortable doing for a very long time.

quote:

As I took another sip of coffee, letting the hot elixir slither down my throat, my eyes caught sight of an ad that I had never seen before. It was an ad that was rarely seen by the public eye. I looked at it carefully scanning each and every printed word.

MYSTIC PARK
WANTED!
ROLLER COASTER ENGINEER
CALL 789-6450
ASK FOR WOODY

Roller coasters, I knew so much about them. I had never actually seen one in person, but I knew more than most who were “coaster junkies”. I acquired all the information that I knew from books, television, and the internet. The strange thing was that I seemed to always have an odd attraction to them, and I couldn’t explain why. Deep in my mind however, I knew that this could be my big break.

quote:

I got up out of my seat and grabbed my phone from the counter. I then started to press the keys requested by the ad. I double checked to make sure they were right before pressing send, there was no turning back now. The phone rang and rang. I almost hung up when finally someone answered.

quote:

“Hello this is Woody, how may I help you?” A man with a deep scruffy voice spoke. It sounded as if he was out of breath, almost like he had been running.

“Yes, my name is Rodney and I…”

“Would like to try out for the position of coaster engineer, am I right?” he replied interrupting me. It was almost as if he could read my mind.

“Yes sir,” I simply said into the receiver, afraid that he was to cut in again.

“Ever worked on roller coasters before sir?” he said, his words quick and sharp. The man was either in a hurry or he was used to random citizens doing the exact thing I was doing. I decided to lie like a trained actor trying out for a specific part in a big-time movie.

quote:

“Yes.” I said holding my breath.

“Then be at Mystic Park around four this afternoon. I will then test you on how capable you are at doing your job. See you then Rodney.” He said and then hung up.

At first I didn’t know what to think, but then I realized that I had a chance. I would go through with it I wondered as I looked back at the clock. I had a few hours to prepare. I couldn’t be late; I was already in a deep hole with little chance of escaping. I couldn’t fall any deeper.

quote:

When the time came, I grabbed my keys from the hook on the kitchen wall and entered the garage. I pressed the red button on the panel in the dusty corner to open up the door. As soon as the task was done, I climbed into my Mustang and started the engine. I immediately switched the radio on and turned it to my favourite station, blasting the song that was currently playing. I then put on my pair of sunglasses, completing my annual routine as I shifted into gear and drove off.

quote:

I sat calmly in my seat listening to music as I steered the sports car along the wooded roads of Huntersberg, a quiet town in which nothing had ever happened. Huntersberg got its name from the lush woods that surrounded it; the forest was a gold mine for those who desired big game. However, Huntersberg finally got onto the map when Mystic Park was built, making the undetectable city not only for hunters but also thrill seekers as well. I tried to make my way to the summer escape before, but I was robbed of that because of the countless hours I spent at the factory, time that was wasted in the end,. Now I was to finally go to Huntersburg’s playground; because I had an invitation and a reason to be there.

quote:

The song that played faded into an untraceable silence as it ended. I reached down to swap stations for I hated listening to commercials that were useless. I continued to fiddle with the dial, turning it this way and that trying to catch a good tune that was worth it. I came across a rock song that I had not heard since I could remember. I settled on it and then turned my attention back to the road. Suddenly a large buck darted blindly out of the thicket of trees. It was frightened beyond reason; I slammed on the brakes as it traveled inches from the Mustang’s hood. The sports car then screeched to a halt, the screaming tires echoing through the woods. The deer then sliced past and vanished into the forest again.

I blinked my eyes briefly trying to comprehend what had happened. Deer were never known to come out of hiding at broad daylight. During the many times I hunted with acquaintances, I had never seen a creature that spooked. I looked to where it had emerged to see a rustle of bushes before sighing in relief. Hopefully nothing else bizarre would happen, but then again one could never predict the future.

A few minutes later I pulled up to the park. The grounds were littered with rides and stands, brightening the area with an array of colors. I looked down for a split second as I took the key from the ignition and then put my attention back to rides that sat waiting for their riders. It was then that my eyes caught sight of the granddaddy of them all, the king of the rides, the infamous roller coaster. The scream machine’s rails towered over all that stood. As I was looking at the steel coaster in awe, a cold shiver went down my spine and my hair stood up on the back of my neck. A strange stinging sensation ran through my body. Startled, I climbed out of the car.

“Probably nothing, perhaps an adrenaline rush,” I said to myself after a brief moment of thinking why that had happened. I quickly put it behind me as I walked through the great iron gates, walking into an opportunity of a lifetime.

quote:

My eyes scanned the grounds; it was very prominent that Mystic Park was on its off season; there was no one around except for a few park employees. As I walked my muscles tightened up, feeling a little stronger than they were. Out of the corner of my eye I saw two park employees who couldn’t take theirs off me. They looked like they were in their middle thirties. The girl had long silky red hair with a beautiful skinny figure. The boy had brown hair and looked somewhat like a daring teenager. Even as I walked away they couldn’t help but to [sic] exchange whispers.

quote:

Then an old man with long white hair pulled into a low ponytail and a small unkempt beard and mustache advanced toward my position. The sun’s rays seemed to make his unnatural white hair glow as he adjusted the collar of his cream shirt covered in an almost renaissance looking vest. He began to smile slightly as he casually stuck one hand into his pocket of his brown trousers. He then held out his smooth hand as a gesture for me to shake it, and I accepted his greeting.

“I’m Woody and you must be Rodney am I right?” he said in his low voice.

“Yep, the one and only,” I replied still examining him. To me it was certain that Woody didn’t look like your ordinary old middle-aged man. In fact, his body possessed the build of a thirty year old. Every aspect about him was – perfect. Suddenly he leaned closer, putting me on high alert as I knew he was probably about to speak of something very important.

“You are a one and only indeed.” He said in a low but serious tone, with both of our eyes bearing into each other’s. Finally, I simply nodded as he motioned for me to come into the main office, but only one thing, a simple fact, struck my mind that stood above everything else. His eyes, I thought, they looked almost – unhuman.

Mercedes posted:

I can't wait to see your ultimate spiral into madness!

quote:

Woody led me down the hall to an office. Inside, were three other men sitting on chairs. The coaster engineer motioned for me to join them. There’s something weird about him, something beyond explanation, I thought. Then Woody left the room and began to talk to someone down the hallway. Hesitating, I turned to the man sitting next to me.

“Did you notice anything weird about him?” I hastily asked.

“No not really,” He replied.

“Did you look at his eyes?”

“What about them?”

“They look like a – cat’s!”

He stared at me like I was crazy then he scooted towards the other edge of his chair, away from me. Was I the only one that could see what his eyes looked like? Get it together! Now is not the time to get scatterbrained!

quote:

Woody suddenly walked into the room. He looked briefly at me; His creature eyes flashed me a sense of uncertainty. Could he have possibly heard what I had said? Then he turned and pulled up a chair in front of us, his ice blue eyes looking at everyone in anticipation.

“Gentlemen,” he started, “today I am going to do a simple but effective test on you. It will be very difficult to the inexperienced coaster engineer. It’s the only thing I’m going to judge you on, so if you can’t do it you’re done. If you show a struggle you’re done. I’ll test you one at a time. For most of you, roller coaster walking will be a living hell, but for one of you – it will not.” He finished looking at me, letting a sly grin come to my view.

quote:

He then guided one of the men out of the room. The few remaining sat quietly talking to each other. Suddenly a small rippling pain shot across my back. Then it went through my arms and legs. I bit my lip and let out a soft hiss of pain.

“You all right?” a man asked, bringing myself to the attention of the others.

“I’m fine,” I muttered as I saw all the men’s eyes on me. One of them even turned to the hopeful next to him only to whisper a suspicion about “being crippled”.

“After this is done, I’m seeing a doctor.” I said under my breath. Hours went by. One by one the men left, none of them got the job. That doesn’t mean it’s automatically mine, he could still interview someone else, I pondered. Then Woody came through the door.

“Your turn.” He said waving me out.

I nodded and warily followed him from the building and back into the park. My body started to act strange again, my heart started to beat faster. As we got closer to the coaster, it began to hammer in my chest. It went from its rhythmic thump to a completely absurd machine gun like metronome. My health was starting to really worry me.

quote:

We began our decent[sic] up the stairs of the steel coaster’s station. My muscles seemed as if they were bulging out of my legs as if they were to burst through my skin at any moment. Something was definitely wrong. However, despite my suffering, I have to go on; I had to have this job! Then we finally reached the heart of the station, the area that actually housed the roller coaster itself, a beast’s lair. Without warning, a larger jolt of pain ran down my back, feeling like an aftershock from a baseball bat hitting me in the spine. I quickly stood up and clutched my back, my nails digging into my shirt as I grinded my teeth in agony, my other hand grasping the queue rail in a stronghold [sic].

quote:

“What’s wrong?” Woody asked, turning around swiftly.

“I don’t know, this all started, this will sound really weird and ludicrous, as soon as I saw your steel coaster.” I said as I forced out the words.

Woody looked at me showing no expression on his face. He raised a thick eyebrow and looked around briefly for any signs that someone could be listening.

“Walk with me Rodney; I’ll explain to you what’s going on.” He said heading out onto the track. As quickly as it came, the pain receded. I had no choice but to follow him. As we begun our decent [sic] up the lift hill, laying a foot only on the stairs that lined the track, my skin tingled and my muscles pumped. Climbing the rails was turning out to be easy. I was even running among them soon I caught up with Woody. I actually felt… powerful.

“Let me ask you a few questions Rodney, Do you feel different walking among the rails?” Woody began as he stared straight ahead with his hands in his pockets, not looking at me once.

“Yeah, I feel power.” I admitted.

“Invincible?”

“Yes, if you put it that way.”

“Let me ask you this, do you feel the urge to protect? The urge to fight?” He continued.

He was right. I did feel the urges to do things. Some heroic, some crazy, and some daring. What was going on with me? Was I being overrun by a force unknown?

“I do.” I answered at last.

“Rodney, you are the only person that I would consider for this job out of anybody.”

“Why? I haven’t even completed my test yet,” I replied befuddled as we broke out in a run down the stairs of the lift hill. How was I able to do this!


“Rodney you will soon learn that you and I have much more in common than you think.” He said as we entered in a tunnel in the most secluded part of the circuit.

“Woody, would you please tell me what’s going on?” I said as we stopped.

evil_cheese posted:

Why does he keep mentioning that is a steel coaster? I don't think you could make a coaster out of say brass or iron these days. Breathlessly awaiting more of this fantastic book. The ups and downs are very frightening!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steel_roller_coaster posted:

A steel roller coaster is a roller coaster that is defined by having a track made of steel. Steel coasters have earned immense popularity in the past 50 years throughout the world. Incorporating tubular steel track and polyurethane-coated wheels, the steel roller coasters can provide a taller, smoother, and faster ride with more inversions than a traditional wooden roller coaster.

Arrow Dynamics first introduced the steel roller coaster to feature tubular track to the thrill industry with their creations of the Matterhorn Bobsleds (Disneyland) in 1959 and the Runaway Mine Train (Six Flags Over Texas) in 1966.

As of 2006, the oldest operating steel roller coaster in North America is Little Dipper at Memphis Kiddie Park in Brooklyn, Ohio and has been operating since April 1952. The oldest operating steel rollercoaster in the world is rodelbaan at de Waarbeek (Netherlands). It has been operating since 1930.

Characteristics

Steel coasters have a generally smoother ride than their wooden counterparts, although it is sometimes argued that wooden roller coasters provide a bigger feeling of "threat" due to their rougher ride and can be more intense than steel roller coasters.

Almost all world records for tallest, fastest, and longest coasters are currently held by steel roller coasters.[citation needed]

The fact that fewer supports are needed means steel roller coasters have made a large variety of features possible, such as Loops, Barrel Rolls, Corkscrews, Zero-G Rolls and Beyond 90° Drops

There are different types of steel coasters, such as flying, inverted, floorless, and suspended swinging.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wooden_roller_coaster posted:

A wooden roller coaster is most often classified as a roller coaster with running rails made of flattened steel strips mounted on laminated wooden track. Occasionally, the support structure may be made out of a steel lattice or truss, but the ride remains classified as a wooden roller coaster due to the track design. Because of the limits of wood, wooden roller coasters in general do not have inversions (when the coaster goes upside down), steep drops, or extremely banked turns (overbanked turns). However, there are exceptions; the defunct Son of Beast at Kings Island had a 214-foot-high (65 m) drop and originally had a 90-foot-tall (27 m) loop until the end of the 2006 season, although the loop had metal supports. Other special cases are Hades at Mount Olympus Water and Theme Park in Wisconsin Dells, Wisconsin, featuring a double-track tunnel and a 90-degree banked turn, The Voyage at Holiday World (an example of a wooden roller coaster with a steel structure for supports) featuring three separate 90-degree banked turns, Ravine Flyer II at Waldameer Park which has a 90-degree banked turn, and T Express at Everland in South Korea with a 77-degree drop.

* snip *

Wooden versus steel

Wooden roller coasters provide a very different ride and experience from steel roller coasters. While they are traditionally less capable than a steel coaster when it comes to inversions and elements, wooden coasters instead rely on an often rougher and more "wild" ride, as well as a more psychological approach to inducing fear. Their structures and track, which usually move anywhere from a few inches to a few feet with a passing train, give a sense of unreliability and the "threat" of collapse or disregard for safety. Of course, this assumption is purely mental, and wooden roller coaster supports and track systems are designed to sway with the force. If the track and structure are too rigid, they will break under the strain of the passing train. The swaying of the track reduces the force applied per second (see impulse), like a shock absorber.

Like steel roller coasters, wooden roller coasters usually use the same three-wheel design, pioneered by John Miller. Each set of wheels includes a running wheel (on top of the track), a side friction (or "guide") wheel (to guide motion in the lateral plane and reduce excessive side-to-side movement known as "hunting") and an upstop wheel (beneath the track to prevent cars from flying off the track). Some wooden coasters, such as Leap-The-Dips, do not have upstop wheels and are known as side friction roller coasters. As a result, the turns and drops are more gentle than on modern wooden roller coasters. Scenic Railway roller coasters also lack upstop wheels but rely on a brakeman to control the speed so that upstop wheels are not necessary. A handful of wooden coasters use flanged wheels, similar to a rail car, eliminating the need for side friction wheels.

The debate rages as to which type of coaster is better: wood or steel. This is unlikely to ever be settled, however, because each category distinguishes itself from the other in a number of ways, in addition to also providing a substantially different and unique ride.

quote:

Woody leaned against the tunnel wall and sighed deeply.

“You better listen up because I’m not going to repeat myself.”

“Understood.” I said as I waited to hear what he had to say.

“Rodney we are from a different world, and we are not human.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” I replied, realizing that the old engineer had gotten on a whole new level of weird.

“Listen! There is a place that co-exists within an amusement park, It [sic] is known as Amusement Park Between. Where the rides have control, were [sic] the impossible becomes possible, and the explainable becomes unexplainable.” Woody replied disgusted, his ice like eyes suddenly getting darker.

“Is this for real Woody?


“First of all it’s not Woody – its [sic] Thunderbark.” He said as he stood there stone still while he barely breathed. He then dipped his head low, letting his long hair drape over his shoulders. The coaster engineer simply stared down, his eyes growing darker still.

quote:

“Okay, if that is your real name then don’t I have some freaky name if I’m from were [sic] you are?” I said letting out a soft laugh.

“Don’t mock our names they are warrior names.” Woody said crudely. “Your real name Rodney is Railrunner.”

“This is very dumb and confusing.” I replied sarcastically in defiance.

“I guess when you are in your human form for so long, you forget nearly everything.” Woody said under his breath.

The awkward conversation was starting to grow amusing. It was actually really funny. I decided to play along.

“If we both are from a different world, then why are we here?” I said trying to hide a cunning smile.

quote:

“It’s a long story Railrunner, but I’ll try to make it as short as possible. There is a prophesy in our word [sic] were [sic] the red will defeat the black. An evil tyrant named Ironwheel is currently ruling our world. He kills for his own amusement; he has armies that take control of our kind. Once you came along our world was given new hope. Soon however, Ironwheel learned of your existence and sent his armies to kill you to prevent the prophesy from becoming true. My allies and I decided you would be safe in the real world.”

“Who are your allies?” I said trying to hide a snicker.

“They are Merrylegs and Static. You may have noticed them when you came in.”

“You mean the redhead and the boy?”

“Yes that is them in their human form. Merrylegs is carousel horse and Static is a bumper car.”

“So am I some sort of ride?” I replied as I crossed my arms.

“Yes. Railrunner, we need to activate your ride form.”

“How?” I said as I tried not to burst out laughing.

“We must introduce you to your environment.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Come closer and I’ll tell you.” He smiled covertly.

I advanced forward towards Woody. I stumbled on the walkway edge, and fell onto the track. Pain ran through my body. It soared down my spine and my anatomy completely. My body was as hot as fire then as cold as ice. My veins rippled beneath my skin. My muscles bulged as my fingers singed. The pain suddenly stopped. I lay on the rails out of breath; I looked up to see him grinning.

quote:

“Your form has been activated.”

“What…”

“You’ll soon find out. You can meet me if you have any other questions.” He interrupted.

“But…”

“You will answer most of them yourself. By the way you got the job. See you tomorrow morning,
Railrunner.”

Dreggon posted:

Who published this?

http://www.amazon.com/Twisted-Miranda-Leek/dp/1452006210/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1359774262&sr=8-1&keywords=twisted+miranda+leek posted:

Product Details

Paperback: 376 pages
Publisher: AuthorHouse (May 26, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1452006210
ISBN-13: 978-1452006215
Product Dimensions: 9 x 0.8 x 6 inches
Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 2.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,422,575 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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http://www.authorhouse.com/ posted:

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We have helped thousands of authors fulfill their publishing dreams. A few authors share their stories and expertise in self-publishing. These case studies highlight a few of their experiences working with AuthorHouse and the publishing industry. Learn more >>

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Authors retain all rights, maintain editorial control and choose the exact selection of services that best suits their goals

EagerSleeper posted:

The picture of our sexy protagonist!

i81icu812 posted:

Please tell me there will be dramatic readings.

JosephWongKS posted:

EagerSleeper, could you help me scan a picture of his roller-coaster form and post it after I post the Chapter 4 review? Thanks!

Mercedes posted:

Did someone say dramatic readings?

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Railrunner, Merrylegs and Static

EagerSleeper posted:

The picture of our sexy protagonist!

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A few hours since I left the park, I was forcing myself not to believe what Woody had said. It was stupid and illogical

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, but what in the world happened to me as I fell onto the rails? Was his story true or was the raging pain a freak accident?

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Whatever had occurred made me now realize that my co-worker was completely demented.

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I was now sitting in the local bar called Snooks with my two friends who used to work at the factory. Buddy and Sly, as they were called, played hearts and betted on money

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while I drank a beer trying to forget the bizarre day.

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“Rodney, when did you get your tattoos and your eyebrows pierced?” Sly said as he layed [sic] a card onto the oak table.

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I looked at the dragon wrapped around my left arm and the tribal symbol on the other, then felt my piercing.

“It was about two weeks ago.”

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“Hmm, say how many beers have you had since we got here?” He laughed.

“This one is – my seventh.” I finished all wide-eyed.

“That’s crazy! You don’t look or feel tipsy.” Buddy said astonished.

“I’m not really feeling anything. You know they say once you drink that much you pass out.” I said looking at the bottle of beer, still bewildered that I had consumed that many and not felt a thing.

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“Man, you,” said Sly, waving his finger at me, “Are possessed!”

Maybe I am. No, I’m not going to believe that crap again!

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“So Rod, where did you get your job?” asked Sly.

“At Mystic Park. I’m the new roller coaster engineer.”

“Rodney! Of all jobs, a roller coaster engineer? I thought you were better than that!” He objected.

“Yeah Rodney, you could have had a job working on cars. I hate those drat roller coasters. They piss you off in more ways than one,” Buddy laughed.

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I felt my head get hot. Suddenly I had the taste for blood. I closed my eyes briefly, trying to clear my mind. I found myself licking my lips and producing more saliva than normal. I glared at Sly and Buddy; I drew my hands into fists, as I was stricken with frustration.

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Then on that note both Buddy and Sly’s beer bottles shattered in their hands, glass piercing through their skin. They both screamed at spectators gathered around them. What did I do! Did I even do this? What’s wrong with me!

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Suddenly I didn’t feel too good. I felt dizzy and lightheaded. I stood, only to stumble against the wall.

“Are you ok?” a shaken waitress asked.

“I’m not sure.” I uttered as I felt beads of sweat coat my forehead.

“Did you drink too much?”

“No,” I lied. Then I walked out the door of the bar. Was I finally feeling the effects of the beer? Or was it something else?

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I went to the back of the bar where my car was parked and started to fiddle with my keys. My hands shook terribly, making me drop them to the pavement. Before I could pick them up, a cat ran from under my car and snatched the keys with his mouth. He then vanished into the darkness. I looked up thinking what next and saw the moon.

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Pain sliced trough [sic] my body.

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I felt hot as fire then cold as ice. I broke out in a tremendous sweat. My fingers singed. Pain raced down my back. My skin turned red as blood, my head throbbed.

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I was getting bigger; thread-by-thread my clothes came apart.

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My jaw popped out of socket, then pushed forward with my nose, forming a long snout. What’s happening to me! My mind screamed. My back ripped through my shirt. Grind! Snap! Pop! The sound of cracking bones, my bones. My skin hardened. My fingers fused together, and then round tips formed at the end, making – wheels.

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“It can’t be!” I said finally realizing. Woody was Thunderbark and his tall tale was true.

My shoulder blades shook as seats shot upwards. Then they formed along my back and up towards my head. My organs started to resituate as my tailbone extended. Everything internal and external compressed and stretched.

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I was changing into my ride form, as Thunderbark had said; I was changing into a roller coaster, a roller coaster called Railrunner, the real me. I felt my mind clearing, being over powered by some unknown force. I was losing control. Pain went through me in spasms. Then it all stopped.

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Railrunner fell to the ground in exhaustion. Inhaling and exhaling heavily.

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The moon hung high overhead, and Railrunner was now running with it. He finally looked up; his fire tone amber eyes caught sight of it.

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Railrunner stood upright on his middle cars. Then he let out a bellowing roar unlike any other, loud and powerful. The cat came out of the shadows and stood some ways from Railrunner.

The cat hissed at him its fur standing on end.

Railrunner glared at it. He crouched low to the ground and arched his back up high. Railrunner pilled [sic] back his lips, revealing dagger like teeth, and snarled menacingly. Saliva dripping from his jaws, he could smell the cats [sic] fear and its blood.

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The cat then let out a loud yowl and induced [sic] its claws. Railrunner then roared, and went strait [/sic] for the cat.

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Before the poor creature ever had a chance to get away, it fell victim to the demon coaster’s jaws.

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Blood seeped into Railrunner’s mouth, it tasted good, he realized, like nectar to a god.

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Out of control, Railrunner then turned and continued his savage raid.

He walked among the concrete; his wheels click clacking. He sniffed; he could smell more fear, more blood. The coaster crept over the bar and gazed down below to see humans. Scrawny and weak, they were no match for an almost twenty thousand pound living roller coaster.

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On the ground paramedics tended to the men with glass shards through their hands. Their red blood, that matched Railrunner’s metal hide, dripped onto the ground. Railrunner smiled wickedly, his bloody teeth glistening in the moonlight.

Then the crazed creature leaped down from the building and on top of the parked ambulance. He threw his head back and roared loudly in pleasure. The frightened humans ran into the streets and some into the bar. He the [sic] climbed down from the ambulance and smashed through the bars [sic] windows.

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Railrunner then ransacked the pub’s interior to bits. The owner of the bar, Geoffrey Calloway, threw a beer bottle at Railrunner’s head; it smashed into a million pieces without the glass scratching Railrunner’s metal.

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He paused then turned and barred [sic] his fangs at the man. Even though the bar owner was very prominent in Rodney’s memory, he found that he could not even recollect his face. Fool, though the roller coaster. He reared back and out of his wheels grew three fifteen –inch stainless steel blades that were perfectly sharp. Railrunner racked [sic] his claws across the quartz counter,

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cutting through it deeply and sharpening them at the same time.

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Fuming with rage, he went after the man.

The frightened soul ran into wine cellar with the steel door. I’m safe, Calloway thought, but he was dead wrong. Railrunner’s claws slashed through the steel door. They cut through the metal like butter. He then began to pull the door off its hinges.

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Suddenly a smoke bomb fell to the floor, making the place vaporous, but Railrunner’s eyes could see through it. He discovered the flashing lights of squad cars. His eyes narrowed and he growled low in his throat.

“Come on out with your hands up!” an officer yelled.

Railrunner walked upright towards the entrance. He then pushed the door off their hinges and stood in the line of fire.

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“It’s a – roller coaster?” One of the police said baffled, the gun shaking in his hand.

Railrunner crossly walked up to the police. They began to fire, their bullets simply bouncing off of him. He then grabbed the front bumper of the cruiser, and tossed it like a toy. It smashed into another car. Railrunner flung an officer out of his way and roared in sheer amusement. Within a blink of an eye he obliterated the small police force.

Railrunner looked at the mess he had made and snorted in disgust as he thought how pathetic the humans were. Then he looked to the moon and wailed, and ran off into the darkness.

JosephWongKS posted:

Credit goes to EagerSleeper for sending me the image of Rodney's were-roller-coaster form.