Where I Read: Miranda Leek's "Twisted"

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JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

Chapter 13 � Arrest

quote:

I walked into the door, and took off my jacket and flung it onto the couch. Suddenly my cell phone rang. It was Clare.

�Clare?�

�Railrunner!� She screamed. They�re coming! Black found out somehow! The FBI and the police are heading right for you!�

�When did you find this out!� I said yelling into the receiver.

�The FBI interviewed me! I didn�t tell them a thing about you! But somehow Black found out! Go Railrunner! Get out of there!� Then there was a loud bang on the door.

Stupid Captain Vicks! His sheer carelessness in turning up the volume on his phone (see Chapter 12) has undermined Detective Black�s masterful investigation by leaking information to the treacherous Clare. I hope that this is just a minor set-back and that justice prevails in the end.

quote:

�They�re already here!� I replied hanging up. Before I knew it a gun was pressed up against my head and I was held in the firm grip of a squad member.

+ + +

Railrunner stood stone still as another officer came through the door and shut it behind him.

Remember what I said about Miranda Leek being consistent about narrating �Rodney� from the first-person perspective and �Railrunner� from the third-person perspective? I take that all back.

quote:

�Got any more ideas, Rodney?� the officer said.

Railrunner looked at the sky. The moon had showed its face once again. His eyes turned into that of which they were.

�His eyes turned into that of which they were�.

quote:

�Gentlemen, you just got on my bad side!� he said as his teeth became fangs. Before the man could fire, Railrunner sunk his teeth into the officer�s neck, making them both fall to the floor. Railrunner began to change rapidly, his metal hide ripped through his skin as seats pierced through his back. The officer he bit was killed instantly, and the other one died from his own bullet that bounced off Railrunner�s metal.

Railrunner is an rear end in a top hat.

quote:

Rage built up inside him, as the urge to protect and fight entered his body. His transformation was much quicker than before, than it had ever been. Bigger he grew the stronger he got. His hands and feet trembled as they became wheels. His nose grew into a long snout as his senses increased. Then he settled, he was his true self again.

Okay, I guess it makes sense to have �Rodney� be written from the third-person perspective and �Railrunner� be written from the first-person perspective, if she�s trying to convey that �Railrunner� has become the �true self�.

quote:

+ + +

�Boy I�m tired of you people being arrogant! If you can�t accept me, I can�t accept you!� I shouted in rage. I gathered my strength and jumped through the roof. Landing in front of the brigade, greeting them with a
mighty roar.

�If you can�t accept me, I can�t accept you!� works if the person saying it has been persecuted for being of a different race / class / etc from the majority, but not if he has already gone on a massive murder-rampage without provocation.

quote:

The bullets started to fly, each one of them bouncing off of me. Then they ceased fire. I began to laugh.

�My turn.� I said, but before I could attack, unexpectedly, I felt a spark ignite from the back of my throat. I opened my mouth, a beam of light shot out like a missile. Shockwaves flew outward from it, destroying nearly everything. Then the beam hit a squad truck, making it explode. The whole ground shook, foundations cracked. The tremors continued, forcing everyone to take cover. Then I realized what I just did, a concussion beam. The blast from it obliterated nearly everything. I suddenly felt weaker, that was
probably why Thunderbark said to use the weapon as a last resort.

Add �concussion beam� to the ever-growing list of Railrunner�s powers. Also, since when did Thunderbark mention that Railrunner had such a power?

quote:

Remaining men came out of hiding. They began to fire once more.

Look at how tremendously courageous these policemen are. They face an evil monster that is immune to bullets and fires beams, but still they stand in the front-line, defending the innocent from that brute�s rampages.

quote:

I charged and flipped over their cruisers, flattening some of the unfortunate. My strength seemed to drain from me. I was getting weaker by the second.

There had to be someway [sic] to recharge myself! Wait a minute, the rails! If I reached them, I could get back to maximum power.

�Powering up from proximity to an amusement park� will never, ever stop being the stupidest superpower.

quote:

I stopped, and ran in the direction of the park. My legs felt like lead as I moved. I could hear bullets brush past me. Helicopters hung overhead, tracking my every move. I ran in zigzags for thirty minutes, destroying everything at [si[sic][/i] my wake. Finally from a distance I could see Mystic Park.

Suddenly I heard a blast like that of a cannon. Seconds later, a great force hit me from above. I opened my eyes to see a blanket of netting in my face. Then the gravity of the situation set in. I was captured!

YES!!!

quote:

+++

Railrunner thrashed in the net. He tried ripping it with his claws, but the it [sic] was made out of some foreign material. He roared in frustration. Then his keen hearing picked up footsteps, Detective Black stepped out of the shadows grinning triumphantly.

�Finally the great beast has been captured!� Black boomed. Railrunner snarled and bared his fangs.

gently caress yeah Detective Black! :black101:

quote:

�Are you some kind of lycanthrope? A new species of were-folk, Rodney?�

�New species� implies that there are existing known species of were-creatures. Detective Black is so badass that he has experience dealing with the realm of the supernatural and paranatural.

quote:

The roller coaster started to stand up, looking hideous. He growled deep in his throat, completely ignoring how weak he was. �My name is not Rodney! It is Railrunner!� he roared.

�Railrunner, you are the biggest masterpiece of death I have seen in my life. The most horrible creature I have ever beheld.�

�You are the sorriest excuse for a cop I�ve ever witnessed.� Railrunner growled.

Big words coming from someone with a million unearned superpowers who nevertheless allowed himself to be captured by a net.

quote:

Then Black let lose a smirk, he pulled out a remote and pressed a red button on it. The net let out an electrical shock equivalent to 100,000 volts. He howled in pain and agony. Electric spasms ran through his entire body, completely draining Railrunner�s energy. Black smiled to himself, he thought Railrunner was finally paying for his evil deeds. Then the red coaster blacked out and fell to the forest floor.

The malicious detective laughed and got on his phone.

�The red is down, send a truck.� He said then hung up.

Why is Detective Black referring to Railrunner as �the red�? The only one who did so was Thunderbark. I hope this doesn�t mean Detective Black is part of the grand were-roller-coaster conspiracy.

quote:

Minutes later a large semi pulled up to where Black and Railrunner was. With a lot of effort, the brilliant red roller coaster was hoisted into the trailer.

�Bright red� =/= �Brilliant red�.

quote:

Black climbed into his SUV and drove towards the highway. Almost thirty black vehicles followed him. Their secret lights flashing as they escorted the large truck down the road.

Detective Black sat with Captain Vick in the lead car.

�Detective, we are going to take this thing to the most secure prison in the area. We need to get an expert roller coaster engineer to come and examine it. Run a few tests, and hope everything works out like we want it to.� Vick began.

�Good. When we arrive I�ll call for the engineer. Hopefully we can figure out where this thing came from in the first place.�

+ + +

I awoke feeling woozy and lightheaded. I looked around; I was in a very dark area, some sort of cell.

Where am I? Suddenly voices could be heard. I blinked and tried to get into focus. Then I realized, I was in a jail cell, behind iron bars!

I hope you rot in jail forever, you filthy murderer.

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 18:56 on Apr 17, 2013

# ? Apr 17, 2013 18:12

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# ? Apr 20, 2024 02:17

Sindai: Jan 24, 2007; i want to achieve immortality through not dying

What the hell is a "secret light"? :psyduck:

# ? Apr 17, 2013 18:22

Piell: Sep 3, 2006; Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer; Young Orc

The weirdest thing about this book is that Rodney is quite clearly the villian. I mean, he goes on rampages and feels no guilt or remorse for murdering innocents or police officers. Yet somehow Miranda Leek sees him as the hero because ???

# ? Apr 17, 2013 18:30

Seraphic Neoman: Jul 19, 2011

It's funny how Miranda is trying to make Detective Black the bad guy and yet the audience completely sympathizes with him. I mean the electric shock might seem like a dick thing to do, but he's dealing with a rampaging, bulletproof mass murderer.
And the over the top "DISSECT HIM" order. Also a dick move but also, you know, Railrunner.

quote:

�Are you some kind of lycanthrope? A new species of were-folk, Rodney?�

Yes goddamnit Detective Black. I previously imagined him as Detective Tyrell Badd, but now I'm imagining him as Detective Tyrell Badd who does monster capture jobs for the Hellsing organization. Note the plural form of "jobs". He's not one of the mooks who gets slaughtered every episode. His weapon of choice is a machete (which he obviously keeps on him just in case poo poo like this goes down) and his capture tool is this electro-net.

I only mention this because it is COMPLETELY loving AWESOME

quote:

�You are the sorriest excuse for a cop I�ve ever witnessed.� Railrunner growled.

Shut the gently caress up Rodney. Detective Black has so far proven to be smarter than all the rest of you chucklefucks combined.

# ? Apr 17, 2013 18:50

Rahonavis: Jan 11, 2012; "Clevuh gurrrl..."

JosephWongKS posted:

�His eyes turned into that of which they were�.

Oh my God, it's been a rough few days (Greater Boston resident) and I have to thank you for this. I am hyperventilating over here!

And the "concussion beam" (totally different from dragon-breath I guess). This whole recap is a thing of beauty. :allears:

my dad posted:

So, despite going against impossible odds, detective Black comes up with an amazing plan that results in the capture of the magical Werecoastermcdickdragonmarysueeequalsmcsquare? And he did stuff like this before? Badass.

I'd missed that before. Detective Black seems to know a lot about were-whatevers. Now unless he is ALSO from Amusement Park Between, I want to know more about what he's been up to before this rollercoaster of hate adventure began...

Rahonavis fucked around with this message at 20:11 on Apr 17, 2013

# ? Apr 17, 2013 18:50

my dad: Oct 17, 2012; this shall be humorous

So, despite going against impossible odds, detective Black comes up with an amazing plan that results in the capture of the magical Werecoastermcdickdragonmarysueeequalsmcsquare? And he did stuff like this before? Badass.

Railrunner posted:

Boy I�m tired of you people being arrogant! If you can�t accept me, I can�t accept you!

my dad fucked around with this message at 19:12 on Apr 17, 2013

# ? Apr 17, 2013 19:07

Iced Cocoa: Jul 14, 2011

So, why is Railrunner a beast when he's changing? Wasn't he supposed to be able to get the beast under control after midnight of the night of the next fullest moon?

My guess is that it's a justification for the bite. Because with the bite, and the "accidental" concussion beam, this whole chapter, the sane Railrunner never directly attacked the police. There's also this paragraph: "Remaining men came out of hiding. They began to fire once more. I charged and flipped over their cruisers, flattening some of the unfortunate." Which still makes it look accidental if those "unfortunates" were police officers.

This is still very contrived justification for that whole thing. Railrunner has willingly put others in the situation where they would face his were-roller coaster side, for instance the thugs from Chapter 11 and with the police this chapter. He doesn't care to keep the beast under control, so him and the beast are one.

And yes, this is the first time the reader gets to hear about the concussion beam.

Detective Black is still kicking rear end :black101:

# ? Apr 17, 2013 20:05

Nyaa: Jan 7, 2010; Like, Nyaa.

quote:

but the it [sic] was made out of some foreign material.

Ohhh, foreign material... How wonderful to have you because other metals just easily get rip apart by railrunner's claw. :allears:

Detective Black's knife must have been made with this foreign material too. :black101:

# ? Apr 17, 2013 21:22

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

SSNeoman posted:

And the over the top "DISSECT HIM" order. Also a dick move but also, you know, Railrunner.

He didn't even say to dissect him, just to bring coaster engineers in to analyze him and run some tests. He's basically bringing in a were-roller-coaster medical team to examine their captive.

I'm kind of curious where the author intends to go with Detective Black; on one hand the narrator pointed out that he thinks he's completely justified in bringing Rodney to justice (leaving aside that, objectively, he is), but on the other the narrator used the adjective "malicious." Black may wind up getting killed off at something resembling a climax, but even if he somehow gets "converted" to Railrunner's side, the Black we know and love may end up just as dead to us as if his torso were shredded apart.

Nyaa posted:

Ohhh, foreign material... How wonderful to have you because other metals just easily get rip apart by railrunner's claw.

Detective Black's knife must have been made with this foreign material too.

Apparently, being an all-American designed and built attraction, Railrunner's key weakness is from materials manufactured in China, Mexico, or other foreign nations. I guess that explains why bullets bounce right off while knives can slip right in.

# ? Apr 17, 2013 22:01

Iced Cocoa: Jul 14, 2011

Bobbin Threadbare posted:

Apparently, being an all-American designed and built attraction, Railrunner's key weakness is from materials manufactured in China, Mexico, or other foreign nations. I guess that explains why bullets bounce right off while knives can slip right in.

Extra stuff!

Where I shed some more light into what's going on without spoilers.

After that picture of ultrasound Railrunner, we have reasonable doubt that this could be the case.

However! It is very relevant to what's going on in the background. Railrunner's bio states that he came to be in 1972. Because if there is one thing Miranda researches, it is roller coasters. Because what's really thought of as the second golden age of roller coasters was the opening of Kings Island in 1972, which featured the roller coaster Racer, which was doing things that hadn't been done before with roller coasters.

However, one is coincidence. So let me tell you about number two.

Miranda Leek posted:

This is Firetrack, a red roller coaster that lived 70 years before Railrunner, and is considered the greatest red (besides Railrunner) of all time. He was stern and persistent - an ideal red. Firetrack was the second red coaster to be born in Between(1905) and lived till he was murdered unexpectedly in 1932 - leaving behind a legacy that all reds after him have tried to match.
When he was King, Firetrack lived in the Ragnora mountains with his mother within the Lost Soul's lair. He ventured all over Between taking care of things but then always returned home to manage Between in privacy or train the elite team of Icecoasters among his other tasks. Soon he fell in love with Pheonixwing, a little orange coaster that worked in a bakery, and married. Firetrack loved the little coaster endlessly for she eased his stress (running Between is no easy task!) Years later, Darkrail returns to Between and in a heated battle, Pheonixwing is infected with "vertigo" (a deadly disease that Darkrail uses as a plague - will get into much later) She falls ill and puts Firetrack's stress and levels of concern through the roof. For three days, he remains by her bedside, taking care of her until the morning of the fourth day when Pheonixwing passes away. Angry, upset, and extremely troubled, Firetrack falls into depression. Blinded by rage and revenge, he seeks out Darkrail only to be slaughtered on the spot. His unexpected death shakes up Between, but no one knows a secret that Firetrack took to his death - one that will change Between and finish what he started.

This isn't really spoilers, except what's in the spoiler tags. This is the prelude of the sequel of Twisted! named Vertigo.

The Great Depression lasted between 1928 and 1933. There is no coincidence that "The Greatest red (besides Railrunner)" died in that timeframe. The Great Depression hit amusement parks hard. In 1930, the number of amusement parks in the US was 1800-2000. By 1935, that number dropped down to 303. Despite the fact that the depression was officially over then, the number of amusement parks continued to dwindle until 1939, then numbering only 245. It's around that time that it is considered that the golden age of amusement parks ended.

Source: http://www.ultimaterollercoaster.com/coasters/history/early_1900/depression.shtml

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 01:29 on Apr 18, 2013

# ? Apr 18, 2013 00:24

my dad: Oct 17, 2012; this shall be humorous

Iced Cocoa posted:

Extra stuff!

I'm... actually impressed. While spergy attention to miniscule detail of a field the author is interested in is an unfortunate norm in books like this, using your knowledge to build a frame for the story in a subtle, non-look-how-smart-I-am way is a good thing.

Rahonavis posted:

I'd missed that before. Detective Black seems to know a lot about were-whatevers. Now unless he is ALSO from Amusement Park Between, I want to know more about what he's been up to before this rollercoaster of hate adventure began...

I've been thinking about this. What are the odds of detective Black being Darkrail?

# ? Apr 18, 2013 01:21

Kinu Nishimura: Apr 24, 2008; SICK LOOT!

C'mon guys, Rodney's totally the hero. I mean, weren't you listening to his pathos-filled ramble in the introduction that we've just come full-circle to? He's trapped in this prison BECAUSE OF WHAT HE IS!!!

# ? Apr 18, 2013 01:47

GrizzlyCow: May 30, 2011

alcharagia posted:

C'mon guys, Rodney's totally the hero. I mean, weren't you listening to his pathos-filled ramble in the introduction that we've just come full-circle to? He's trapped in this prison BECAUSE OF WHAT HE IS!!!

Delicious snark aside. Isn't that pretty much true? Most people would expect bloodthirsty, sociopathic murderers who go on a killing spree to be locked up given the chance.

# ? Apr 18, 2013 02:13

Kinu Nishimura: Apr 24, 2008; SICK LOOT!

GrizzlyCow posted:

Delicious snark aside. Isn't that pretty much true? Most people would expect bloodthirsty, sociopathic murderers who go on a killing spree to be locked up given the chance.

Don't you get it! That's his curse! Because of where he is from!

# ? Apr 18, 2013 02:55

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

Iced Cocoa posted:

This is the prelude of the sequel of Twisted! named Vertigo.

I tried looking for Miranda Leek's Vertigo on Amazon, but can't seem to find it. Is it available for purchase anywhere?

# ? Apr 18, 2013 03:21

Iced Cocoa: Jul 14, 2011

JosephWongKS posted:

I tried looking for Miranda Leek's Vertigo on Amazon, but can't seem to find it. Is it available for purchase anywhere?

No, it's not out yet.

I could have sworn that I read somewhere that she had already written it, but was waiting for the edited version of Twisted! being published before she would publish Vertigo. Maybe in some comment I managed to read.

But at least there is a lot of information online about what happens in Vertigo. She had drawn spot illustrations from it and put on DA, with description of what happens in each scene the illustration is set in along with in which part it is in. So the structure of the book is done. Maybe I'll try to compile all those snippets of scenes together for one big effort post later, because I doubt Vertigo will be published before this thread is over.

# ? Apr 18, 2013 07:48

Antlerhill: Nov 6, 2012; Smellrose

Does Clare have a full name? I might have missed it in one of the updates.

Both Rodney and the narrator call her Clare, but in the last chapter the FBI "captain" calls her miss Clare.

So is her name Clare Clare? Does everyone call her by her last name?
Or is she such an empty shell of a character that Miranda Leek didn't bother giving her a last name?

# ? Apr 18, 2013 15:46

Deadmeat5150: Nov 21, 2005; OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN

Both?

# ? Apr 18, 2013 16:14

attackbunny: May 1, 2009

Antlerhill posted:

Does Clare have a full name? I might have missed it in one of the updates.

Both Rodney and the narrator call her Clare, but in the last chapter the FBI "captain" calls her miss Clare.

So is her name Clare Clare? Does everyone call her by her last name?
Or is she such an empty shell of a character that Miranda Leek didn't bother giving her a last name?

Clare is of Polish descent. Her surname is Zdzieszyńska. Special Agent Captain decided not to try.

quote:

This is Firetrack, a red roller coaster that lived 70 years before Railrunner, and is considered the greatest red (besides Railrunner) of all time.

I'm actually pleased about this because before I knew that Railrunner's coaster mum is called Angeltrack and that his coaster fuckdoll is called Shadowtrack. At least now I know that it's just unoriginality rather than an Oedipus complex.

# ? Apr 18, 2013 18:18

Iced Cocoa: Jul 14, 2011

attackbunny posted:

I'm actually pleased about this because before I knew that Railrunner's coaster mum is called Angeltrack and that his coaster fuckdoll is called Shadowtrack. At least now I know that it's just unoriginality rather than an Oedipus complex.

I hope you manage to stick around until the final chapter of this book. :allears:

# ? Apr 18, 2013 18:41

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

Chapter 14 - Caged Bird

quote:

My heart started to beat faster; I looked around franticly [sic] for a way out, there was none. I got up and tried to walk forward, unfortunately chains were attached tightly around my �wrists�, I snorted in revulsion.

Oh gently caress off Railrunner. You are revulsed by the chains that are around your �wrists�, but not by the death and destruction which have rightfully earned you those chains?

Also, why are �wrists� in quote-marks?

quote:

The iron shackles still allowed me to walk to the edge of the bars, there was just two guards sitting at a round table playing cards. I gripped the bars and pulled, I was still too weak from the blast to even bend them.

I backed into the corner of my cell. My thoughts filled me with dread. How was I to escape? Would I ever see Thunderbark, Merrylegs, or Static ever again? What about Clare? What will happen to her? What will these men do to me? Rip me open and experiment? Disassemble? Kill? Just because I accidentally killed their kind? Because their blood was spilled? The thoughts still continued to race. Some sickened, and some saddened me.

�Accidentally� killed their kind.

�Accidentally�.

:argh:

quote:

I contemplated more. What was going to become of Amusement Park Between, I wondered. Would Ironwheel dominate completely? I shook my head trying to clear my mind; that technique wasn�t working out to [sic] well. I remembered horrible images, all the brutal things I did. Those poor souls. Those poor people. All because of me. All because of this curse, that I can never transverse for as long as I live.

Not �this curse�. You. You did it! Last chapter, when you were �in control� in your roller-coaster-form, you were the one who chose to �sunk his teeth into the officer�s neck, making them both fall to the floor� The officer he bit was killed instantly, and the other one died from his own bullet that bounced off Railrunner�s metal�. Take responsibility for your actions, coward.

Also, �transverse� =/= �overcome�.

quote:

My pondering was interrupted by Detective Black slamming the doors open. The two guards greeted him, but they were hastily escorted out. He walked up to the cell, standing probably two meters away for his own good.

He looked at me with a firm gaze.

�Evening, Railrunner.�

I replied with a growl.

�Railrunner, why are you here?� he asked as he crossed his arms in defiance.

Stupid Railrunner. Detective Black wouldn�t cross his arms �in defiance�. He�s not the one in the position of weakness here; you are.

quote:

�It�s not on my own will, detective.� I said coldly

Yes it is! You are the one that�s been going around murdering people and animals and destroying property! Take responsibility for your actions.

quote:

�Then whose is it?�

�You�re an ornery one; you�ll be hard to digest.� I said coming to the edge of the bars. I wanted to play with his mind, make him suffer.

�You are a bit of an rear end yourself.� He said making a quick comeback. I was glad he was getting his mind off his last question. I couldn�t reveal any of the others.

�I take that as a compliment,� I replied.

�You�re welcome. Where did you come from, Railrunner?�

�Detective, you are being pushy. I am from a place no mortal such as you will ever find.�

Black sighed, he was getting frustrated, and I was loving every minute of it.

Detective Black is not frustrated. He�s just sick of your poo poo.

quote:

�Well then, were you born or built?�

�That Detective I cannot answer, I don�t know that.� I answered, but began to speculate, that was a fact I did want to know.

We know that you were born, though the world would be a much better place, and there would be fewer widows and orphans, if you�d never been born.

quote:

�Why did you kill all those people, Railrunner?�

�A roller coaster is considered out of control on your rails. In our world, when our ride form is activated we are uncontainable till the full moon is at its highest. As you can now see I am stable, and I mean no harm.� I sighed, but Black only gave me a grimace.

You were stable last chapter and you �sunk his teeth into the officer�s neck, making them both fall to the floor� The officer he bit was killed instantly, and the other one died from his own bullet that bounced off Railrunner�s metal�. Take responsibility for your actions! :argh:

quote:

�But you still had blood on your wheels, Railrunner. You are still going to pay for ruining my life as well as all the others.� He finished storming to the exit. �By the way, I�m having an expert evaluate you.� He smiled depravity [sic].

Yeah, that�s our Detective Black, always placing duty above self and never wasting time on self-pity. But what has that dastard done to you to ruin your life? :ohdear:

quote:

I held my middle wheel up. He walked out and shut the door behind him. I wanted him dead now more than ever.

What happened to �I mean no harm�?

At the very least, have some gratitude to Detective Black. He saved your girlfriend from being killed by you.

quote:

Then I wondered who the evaluator was? The door opened again and the two guards came back in, this time with a box of snacks. I got back up against the cell wall and layed [sic] down. I sighed watching a mouse scurry by, wishing to run and be free like it.

If you wished to be run and free, maybe you shouldn�t have murdered people.

quote:

It was now ten o� clock. An hour had passed. Suddenly, I heard voices outside the room. The door creaked open, and the two guards stood and walked out. Great, I thought, Detective Black was coming back for a visit. But to my revelation, it wasn�t Black, it was the evaluator he called, it was Thunderbark!

Don�t be too happy, Railrunner. Detective Black is just entrapping Thunderbark and giving him the rope with which to hang himself.

quote:

My hopes rose, but I tried not to look euphoric. He edged close to the bars, and pretended to observe me. He looked up at me and winked. Thunderbark turned and yelled. �He�s a big one! I�ll need some time to get a good look at him!� He made sure they were gone then turned to me.

�Railrunner! How on earth!� He whispered promptly.

I let out a whoosh of air. �Long story Thunderbark.�

�Tell me later,� he laughed, but then he became serious. �Railrunner you can bend metal! Problem is you will only be able to move small amounts, no bigger than a grain of sand. I cannot get you out of here; I can�t bend metal, only wood. But you can! You can figure something out.�

No no no no no! As if it wasn�t already bad enough that he got Uncle Iroh�s power, now he gets Toph�s power as well? This is bullshit!

quote:

�Why don�t you just transform and pull these bars apart!�

�You are in this horrid place by your own fault!� He said changing his tone. �You used a concussion beam when you weren�t ready.�

His �fault� wasn�t �using a concussion beam�, it was murdering people! Are we seriously supposed to sympathize with this group of amoral killers?

quote:

�If I get captured we are screwed. I would help you out of here, but we will need Merrylegs and Static in order to pull it off successfully. I can fetch them, but in the meantime you need to recharge your energy. You can take some from my ring.� He said handing it to me.

�Will I be strong enough to pry the bars apart?� I asked.

�No. But you will probably have enough to bend metal.� He smiled.

�So let me get this straight, this is all you can help me with?�

�No, but I can turn off the security cameras and alarms for you. Railrunner, I am sorry, but you need to learn this technique, and this is the time! And we�re going to need all the time for tonight! We have to steal the Augu Ra and say our farewells.�

�What do you mean farewells?� I interrupted.

�Railrunner, I�m sorry but we must go to Amusement Park Between tonight. There is too much at stake in our world and this one.�

I sighed. �Perhaps you are right. I�ll work hard to try and bend metal while you round up Merrylegs and Static.� I said touching the ring. A small surge of power ran through me. After my body was satisfied, I handed it back to him. He started to head out, but then he turned around and spoke again.

�Remember, you can bend any type of metal, wherever it may be.� He smiled.

As Thunderbark exited, I realized he was giving me a hint. I just had to figure it out.

I hope Railrunner horribly mangles himself during his experiments with metal-bending.

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 22:23 on Apr 18, 2013

# ? Apr 18, 2013 22:12

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

List of damage caused by Railrunner

Chapter 4
1. Shattered the beer bottles being held by his friends Buddy and Sly, injuring their hands
2. Killed a cat
3. Wrecked the ambulance that came in response to Buddy and Sly's injuries
4. Wrecked a bar, killing at least 1 civilian
5. Attacked the bar-owner
6. Attacked the police officers who came in response to the chaos, killing 5 of them

Chapter 5
7. Killed and ate a bull

Chapter 8
8. Attacked his girlfriend Clare

Chapter 9
9. Attacked Detective Black when he jumped in front of Clare to defend her from Railrunner's assault
10. Ran through the carnival, destroying nearly everything in his path, from toppling over small rides to completely obliterating food stands
11. Killed and ate a "fat black and white dairy cow"
12. Attacked and killed a SWAT officer who came in response to the chaos
13. Attacked his girlfriend Clare again
14. Attacked Detective Black again
15. Tried to attack Thunderbark with lightning

Chapter 11
16. Cold-bloodedly murdered a gang of thugs who had accosted Clare but who had swiftly surrendered after seeing Railrunner's were-roller-coaster form
17. Attacked a pair of police officers who had come in response to a report of armed robbery in the area
18. Pushed large trucks out of his way while chasing the abovementioned police officers on the road, presumably causing multiple vehicle collisions

Chapter 13
19. Killed a police officer by biting him in the neck
20. Killed another police officer by deflecting a bullet back into the police officer
21. Caused mass destruction to a group of police officers by firing a �concussion beam�
22. Flattened some more police officers by �flipping their cruisers� and crushing them underneath

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 22:34 on Apr 18, 2013

# ? Apr 18, 2013 22:18

Kinu Nishimura: Apr 24, 2008; SICK LOOT!

Absolutely fantastic chapter, I was on the edge of my seat and also crying my eyes out. I hope that meanie Detective Black gets eaten by Railrod's laser space buzzsaw-firing cannons (spoilers)

# ? Apr 18, 2013 22:24

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

List of Railrunner�s powers

Chapter 4
1. Possesses claws that are 15-inch long and perfectly sharp

Chapter 5
2. Ability to run �faster than a car at top speed�
3. Can �hear anything and everything�
4. Heightened stealth

Chapter 7
5. Bend lightning
6. Bend fire
7. Super strength
8. Super agility
9. Predict when things will happen, except death
10. Sense trouble
11. Never get sick
12. Venomous
13. Sight of a dragon
14. Gain power from amusement parks and carnivals
15. Control the speed of rides and how long they last

Chapter 10
16. Healing factor

Chapter 11
17. Immunity to bullets

Chapter 12
18. Can change at will if wearing the Augu Ra
19. Can move between the worlds when wearing the Augu Ra

Chapter 13
20. Can fire concussion beams

Chapter 14
21. Bend metal

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 22:45 on Apr 18, 2013

# ? Apr 18, 2013 22:33

Iced Cocoa: Jul 14, 2011

So far any of the killing Railrunner has done when in control has all been situational and not direct. indicated by Third Person Narrative. It's simply a device to help the reader to disassociate Railrunner with all the killing.

He bit an officer while in third person, but when in third person he accidentally fired off a concussion beam, a cop shot at him only for the bullet to bounce back at him, and he flipped those cars only in an attempt to escape.

However! It does not absolve him from responsibility. When he has been in first person and human, he has deliberately put himself in the sort of situation where his "beast" in third person would destroy everyone around. There was the thing with the robbers, and now with the cops.

This is a recurring theme in the book. Given how often Miranda has changed perspective it isn't spoilers that it will happen in the future. But it might be worth it to look at just when the narration goes away from First Person from the perspective of Railrunner.

And JWKS, those lists are marvelous. And they're going to get longer. Though you missed two powers, both in chapter 12.
1) Can change at will if wearing the Augu Ra
2) Can move between the worlds when wearing the Augu Ra

# ? Apr 18, 2013 22:41

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

Iced Cocoa posted:

And JWKS, those lists are marvelous. And they're going to get longer. Though you missed two powers, both in chapter 12.
1) Can change at will if wearing the Augu Ra
2) Can move between the worlds when wearing the Augu Ra

I've edited them in. Thanks!

# ? Apr 18, 2013 22:44

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

It's funny when you think about it. A very good author can make the reader empathize with the protagonist and the antagonist, and an average writer can make the reader empathize with the protagonist along, but it takes a special sort of talent to make the reader empathize with the antagonist alone.

# ? Apr 18, 2013 23:26

GrizzlyCow: May 30, 2011

Edit: No, actually this was a dumb comment.

GrizzlyCow fucked around with this message at 01:55 on Apr 19, 2013

# ? Apr 19, 2013 01:41

Nyaa: Jan 7, 2010; Like, Nyaa.

JosephWongKS posted:

List of Railrunner�s powers

I like to think that Miranda is just too :effort:

to deal with the mess that she wrote Railrunner into and just give him at least one super power every chapter to specifically resolve the troubles with Violences. :allears:

# ? Apr 19, 2013 03:20

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

Nyaa posted:

I like to think that Miranda is just too to deal with the mess that she wrote Railrunner into and just give him at least one super power every chapter to specifically resolve the troubles with Violences.

Speaking of that, shouldn't Railrunner's powers to "Predict when things will happen, except death" and "Sense trouble" have allowed him to avoid being found by the police in the first place, let alone being captured by Detective Black's electro-net?

# ? Apr 19, 2013 03:27

crime weed: Nov 9, 2009

Black
Paranormal Detective
Book V: The Deadly Ride

quote:

Detective Black is back with another thrilling mystery to solve! In the small town of Huntersberg, nicknamed "the city on the edge of reality", where mankind's greatest dreams and fears are realized, trouble is once again brewing. Follow Black and his trusty band of officers as discover what truly happens to lonely, neglected amusement park attractions, but beware! Not everyone who's getting on this ride is getting off... Alive!

crime weed fucked around with this message at 04:52 on Apr 19, 2013

# ? Apr 19, 2013 04:46

Deadmeat5150: Nov 21, 2005; OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN

Kjoery posted:

Black
Paranormal Detective
Book V: The Deadly Ride

I've got a signed copy :smug:

# ? Apr 19, 2013 07:09

Iced Cocoa: Jul 14, 2011

JosephWongKS posted:

Speaking of that, shouldn't Railrunner's powers to "Predict when things will happen, except death" and "Sense trouble" have allowed him to avoid being found by the police in the first place, let alone being captured by Detective Black's electro-net?

Already there are at least two powers on the list that have been totally forgotten and will never come up again.

Kjoery posted:

Black
Paranormal Detective
Book V: The Deadly Ride

Now I know what to write next NaNoWriMo. Though it might be just Book 1, because trying to write Twisted! from another POV might be too much for my sanity.

Edit: Forgot yet another power of his, remotely break class in chapter 4.

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 11:13 on Apr 19, 2013

# ? Apr 19, 2013 08:17

attackbunny: May 1, 2009

Iced Cocoa posted:

I hope you manage to stick around until the final chapter of this book.

Aw man. Feeling hella dejected now.

Everyone's being so meeeeean to Rodney, it's not like anyone he murdered was a named character.

# ? Apr 19, 2013 18:52

Nyaa: Jan 7, 2010; Like, Nyaa.

JosephWongKS posted:

Speaking of that, shouldn't Railrunner's powers to "Predict when things will happen, except death" and "Sense trouble" have allowed him to avoid being found by the police in the first place, let alone being captured by Detective Black's electro-net?

You know, I was gonna add "After the problem is resolved, Miranda will forget and never mention the power ever again" but then I decided to give her the benefit of a doubt. Guess I was already proven wrong. :allears:

# ? Apr 20, 2013 03:51

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

Chapter 15 - Prison Break

quote:

I sat in the corner of the cell up against the wall. I thought about what Thunderbark had said. What could he possibly be telling me? I looked out at the guards. They were now eating cereal, littering the floor.

In a story featuring were-roller-coasters and a parallel world of living amusement park rides, somehow it�s the notion of prison guards eating cereal in jail that strikes me as being incongruous. Isn�t it a breakfast that you eat at home? Do American workers in general or prison guards in particular typically bring cereal to the workplace to eat?

quote:

Thunderbark wasn�t helping me on purpose. The white coaster wanted to teach me a lesson. Plus he wasn�t giving me a helping hand because he wanted me to learn something new. I started to flex my left set of wheels, making them pop. I then peered at the two guards again. A mouse scattered from underneath the table with a piece of cereal. It scampered into my cell and sat in the opposite corner and started to eat. I looked at it, examined it. Then something donned [sic] on me.

I glanced back at the guards once again. I zeroed in on the cereal box, and began to read what it contained. A single ingredient caught my attention, Iron [spelt with a capital �I�]. Thunderbark�s last words rang in my head. I turned to the mouse; it was eating an item that contained iron. Minuscule amounts of iron. My eyebrow raised, I had an idea, I just wondered if it would work.

No.

quote:

I extended my right set of wheels out slowly. I pointed them at the mouse�s tiny body. I kept my �fingers� close together, nothing was happening yet. I then pulled my wheels apart, the mouse squeaked in sudden shock. Its fragile bones snapped as it suddenly got on its hindquarters. It cried in pain. I watched in pure amazement, I was manipulating the metal within the mouse�s body!

No, please no.

quote:

I moved my arm a little, the mouse�s forearms stood straight up. I raised it higher; the little animal hovered in the air. Then I made a fist. The mouse�s body jerked, then he let out a final squeak as its blood splattered on my wheels. I pulled them back in astonishment, the mouse dropped to the cell floor dead. I looked at my wheels in bewilderment, I had figured out what Thunderbark had told me. I could make others do my every will, by simply bending the amount of iron in their blood.

NO NO NO NO NO! NOW HE GETS loving BLOOD-BENDING ON TOP OF LIGHTNING-BENDING AND METAL-BENDING? THIS IS BULLSHIT! MIGHT AS WELL GIVE HIM ENERGY-BENDING WHILE YOU ARE AT IT!

:argh:

quote:

The door slammed open as Detective Black came into the room once more. I felt a grim smile spread across my face. I watched Detective Black take a handful of cereal and plopped pieces into his mouth. Boy, was he doing the completely erroneous thing.

�Railrunner I am charging you for murder, destruction of private property, trespassing, and other accounts. You are sentenced to be put to further examination and later death. What do you think of that?� He said looking up to me.

This is new to me. Do police officers in America have the power to act as judge, jury and executioner as well? Though if there�s anyone whom I wouldn�t mind being Judge Dredd, it�s Detective Black.

quote:

I glanced down to see the keys on his belt. I looked into his eyes, and exchanged a grin. �Detective, they say I am a damned soul, but it is yours that is dark and bleak. And there is something else, Detective.�

�What might that be?�

I held out my wheels, and extended them apart. Black�s body froze and his arms hung in the air like a puppet. He looked at me in horror.

�You need to watch your iron intake.� I said making Black grab his keys and toss them into the cell.

�What are you doing to me!� he cried.

�Killing you.� I replied making a fist. Black�s blood sprayed through his shirt. He fell to the floor like a rag doll.

Bahahaha, how cute, Railrunner. You actually think Detective Black would die from something as minor as a hole in his chest.

quote:

I quickly grabbed the keys and unlocked the cell door. I climbed out and faced rounds of the guard�s bullets. I roared and flung them aside. I smashed my way through the exit, catching several officers off guard. I used my body and slammed them onto the wall. More came at me from all sides like an archaic army; I swung my tail, knocking the men down like bowling pins. I ran wild through the halls, using my sense of smell as my guide.

Actually, an �archaic army� would probably come at an opposing force from one direction. Flanking and encircling moves were actually pretty difficult to execute during the time of �archaic armies�.

Also, not a single police officer so far in series has been fazed by the prospect of confronting Railrunner the twenty foot-long, twenty thousand pound roller-coaster monster who is known to be immune to bullets. If Miranda Leek is trying to make the reader despise the police in this story, she�s going about it in a very strange way.

quote:

I continued to make my way down corridors. I stopped to sniff the air again, however a cop jumped onto my back. He made his way up to my head. I growled and popped open my restraint, the blunt force knocking the man out. I snorted and continued to run. Finally the exit was in sight, but it was blocked by a barricade of men. I swerved and darted into the garage where all the cruisers where kept. I stopped dead in my tracks. The captain of the FBI stood there like a stone wall with a huge gun. It was a large weapon that fired some sort of missile, either way I did not like where this was heading.

I didn�t know rocket-launchers were standard-issue weapons within the FBI. Man, I�m learning so much about the American police force from this book.

quote:

�You may be classified as super natural [spelt as two separate words instead of �supernatural�], but I think a bit differently.�

He began as he aimed. I bolted right as he fired. I hid behind a squad truck.

I�m surprised Miranda Leek didn�t just give Railrunner �immunity to missiles� as well.

quote:

�How ironic! It is the roller coaster that is playing chicken!� he said firing another missile. It struck not but ten cars from where I was. I moved again like a soldier on my belly. I slowly made my way toward the opening of the garage. Along the way I passed a light switch, I�d be better off in the dark than him. I switched it, my eyes automatically adjusted to the change of light. The captain looked around nervously.

�Sight of a dragon� apparently includes being able to see in the dark.

quote:

�Can�t you see in the dark, Captain?� I said loudly so he could hear. He turned and fired, once again missing.

�Guess not. To bad for you.� I said placing my wheels under a car. I waited till his back was turned and then I made my move, throwing the car at him. I didn�t look back to see if the police car met its target. I just ran outside, into freedom.

My wheels sounded like galloping horses as I traveled on the concrete. I glanced back; the police would soon come after me. I did not have long; Thunderbark was to meet me at the museum. From there we would steal the Augu Ra. After that was done, I would say farewell to Clare. My stomach cringed at the thought of all this. I would have to play my cards straight, and go from there.

I took a shortcut through the woods. It felt like the night I spent with Clare, but after this night, those days were over. Never again would that be a reality, only a dream. I ran to the edge of a cliff. It was the one where you could see every bit of Huntersville. I scanned below, within no time, I spotted the history museum. In the brambles behind it, were Thunderbark and the gang. I threw back my head and howled like a wolf to signal that I had arrived. I could feel that Thunderbark was happy as could be. And so was I.

How nice of Railrunner to give his position away. I hope the police surround them next chapter and utterly destroy Railrunner and his band of murderous thugs.

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 17:34 on Apr 20, 2013

# ? Apr 20, 2013 09:27

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

List of Railrunner�s powers

Chapter 4
1. Remotely shatter glass
2. Possesses claws that are 15-inch long and perfectly sharp

Chapter 5
3. Ability to run �faster than a car at top speed�
4. Can �hear anything and everything�
5. Heightened stealth

Chapter 7
6. Bend lightning
7. Bend fire
8. Super strength
9. Super agility
10. Predict when things will happen, except death
11. Sense trouble
12. Never get sick
13. Venomous
14. Sight of a dragon
15. Gain power from amusement parks and carnivals
16. Control the speed of rides and how long they last

Chapter 10
17. Healing factor

Chapter 11
18. Immunity to bullets

Chapter 12
19. Can change at will if wearing the Augu Ra
20. Can move between the worlds when wearing the Augu Ra

Chapter 13
21. Can fire concussion beams

Chapter 14
22. Bend metal

Chapter 15
23. Bend blood
24. See in the dark
25. Heightened sense of smell

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 14:37 on Apr 20, 2013

# ? Apr 20, 2013 09:29

JosephWongKS: Apr 4, 2009; by Nyc_Tattoo

# ? Apr 20, 2013 09:34

my dad: Oct 17, 2012; this shall be humorous

Detective Black, no! :ohdear:

# ? Apr 20, 2013 09:49

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# ? Apr 20, 2024 02:17

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

Bobbin Threadbare posted:

Black may wind up getting killed off at something resembling a climax, but even if he somehow gets "converted" to Railrunner's side, the Black we know and love may end up just as dead to us as if his torso were shredded apart.

Goddamnit. I knew this would happen, but I didn't expect I'd be so literal about it.

JosephWongKS posted:

In a story featuring were-roller-coasters and a parallel world of living amusement park rides, somehow it’s the notion of prison guards eating cereal in jail that strikes me as being incongruous. Isn’t it a breakfast that you eat at home? Do American workers in general or prison guards in particular typically bring cereal to the workplace to eat?

If our shift demands we eat breakfast at work, we usually don't pack something as potentially messy as cereal. Soup in a thermos, breakfast bars, egg sandwiches, basically anything that packs well and can be eaten standing up is what's standard.

quote:

NO NO NO NO NO! NOW HE GETS loving BLOOD-BENDING ON TOP OF LIGHTNING-BENDING AND METAL-BENDING? THIS IS BULLSHIT! MIGHT AS WELL GIVE HIM ENERGY-BENDING WHILE YOU ARE AT IT!

For crying out loud, even Magneto had to use metal smuggled in by way of poisoning a guard's drink before he could break out of prison.

quote:

This is new to me. Do police officers in America have the power to act as judge, jury and executioner as well?

Ha ha ha ha ha ha

quote:

Bahahaha, how cute, Railrunner. You actually think Detective Black would die from something as minor as a hole in his chest.

At least it means he's out of the story! Time for ~*FanFiction*~ to take over!

# ? Apr 20, 2013 10:02

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Where I Read: Miranda Leek's "Twisted"

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