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  • Locked thread
attackbunny
May 1, 2009

quote:

“What’s his motif [sic] anyway?” I asked. For a while nobody answered. They all just gave me blank stares. Finally Thunderbark spoke up.
"I dunno, Miranda didn't bother to think of one."

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horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?
Achterbahn is roller coaster in german. I bet Miranda can say "I loving love roller coasters" fluently in 25 different languages.

I'd calculate the probability of Railrunner actually being able to float in water, but I think even Miranda knows how bullshit that is.



Oh, what the hell:
In order to float in a substance, you have to have a smaller density than the substance. Steel itself might not float, but due to the hollow body of a ship, the total volume is great enough to reach the density necessary to become buoyant. Since Railrunner swims through water, we'll need the density of water, which conveniently is 1 gram per cubic centimeter.
We know Railrunner is 200 feet long (Edit: 20 feet, you idiot), and by measuring his dimensions we got a height from back to belly of half a meter. Being a roller coaster, he's supposed to comfortably seat two adults in a row, so we'll assume he's 2 meters wide. That gives us a volume of 61 (Edit: 6.1) cubic meters. Given that Railrunner is 20000 pounds, we know that Railrunner has a density of...

0.1487 grams per cubic centimeter.

I...
What.
Not only does Railrunner float, he floats really well. As improbable as a 20000 pound steel colossus swimming through water might seem, it's actually entirely possible.
That is, until he submerges and his back fills up with water, killing his buoyancy until he can get rid of the water.


1.49 grams per cubic centimeter. He'd sink faster than his inferior carousel-horse buddies. End of story.

horriblePencilist fucked around with this message at 17:20 on Apr 28, 2013

attackbunny
May 1, 2009

horriblePencilist posted:

Achterbahn is roller coaster in german. I bet Miranda can say "I loving love roller coasters" fluently in 25 different languages.
So when Tia Dalma says “Well, as I was saying, it is a two day trip and it is at the most remote part of Amusement Park Between. It is under the large island Magmarr that lies in the middle of the Acterbahnn River.” she's actually saying 'it's on pikachurr island in rolercasterr river'.

Placing my bet now that Magmarr Island is distinguished by having a shitton of lava.

horriblePencilist posted:

Oh, what the hell:
In order to float in a substance, you have to have a smaller density than the substance. Steel itself might not float, but due to the hollow body of a ship, the total volume is great enough to reach the density necessary to become buoyant. Since Railrunner swims through water, we'll need the density of water, which conveniently is 1 gram per cubic centimeter.
We know Railrunner is 200 feet long, and by measuring his dimensions we got a height from back to belly of half a meter. Being a roller coaster, he's supposed to comfortably seat two adults in a row, so we'll assume he's 2 meters wide. That gives us a volume of 61 cubic meters. Given that Railrunner is 20000 pounds, we know that Railrunner has a density of...

0.1487 grams per cubic centimeter.

I...
What.
Not only does Railrunner float, he floats really well. As improbable as a 20000 pound steel colossus swimming through water might seem, it's actually entirely possible.
That is, until he submerges and his back fills up with water, killing his buoyancy until he can get rid of the water.
Railrunner's twenty feet long, not two hundred. Would that make his density 1.666 g/cm2?

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?

attackbunny posted:

Railrunner's twenty feet long, not two hundred. Would that make his density 1.666 g/cm2?

Oh, you're right. 1.49 g/cm^3, actually, but still plenty to drop like a rock.
Yeah, Miranda's bullshit. False alarm.

horriblePencilist fucked around with this message at 17:21 on Apr 28, 2013

JosephWongKS
Apr 4, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo

horriblePencilist posted:

Oh, you're right. 1.49 g/cm^3, actually, but still plenty to drop like a rock.
Yeah, Miranda's bullshit. False alarm.


List of Railrunner’s powers

Chapter 4
1. Remotely shatter glass
2. Possesses claws that are 15-inch long and perfectly sharp

Chapter 5
3. Ability to run “faster than a car at top speed”
4. Can “hear anything and everything”
5. Heightened stealth

Chapter 7
6. Bend lightning
7. Bend fire
8. Super strength
9. Super agility
10. Predict when things will happen, except death
11. Sense trouble
12. Never get sick
13. Venomous
14. Sight of a dragon
15. Gain power from amusement parks and carnivals
16. Control the speed of rides and how long they last

Chapter 10
17. Healing factor

Chapter 11
18. Immunity to bullets

Chapter 12
19. Can change at will if wearing the Augu Ra
20. Can move between the worlds when wearing the Augu Ra

Chapter 13
21. Can fire concussion beams

Chapter 14
22. Bend metal

Chapter 15
23. Bend blood
24. See in the dark
25. Heightened sense of smell

Chapter 16
26. Shrink at will to fit into confined spaces
27. Control gravity so that they can "descend up"
28. Breathe “icy mist” that reveals infra-red sensors
29. Walk on walls and ceilings
30. Fall and land quietly on his wheels

Chapter 18
31. Become “engrossed” by the sight of violence
32. Disintegrate people with his McGuffin

Chapter 19
33. Nictitating membranes over his eyes
34. Can hold his breath for more than thirty minutes
35. Bend water :siren:

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

horriblePencilist posted:

Achterbahn is roller coaster in german. I bet Miranda can say "I loving love roller coasters" fluently in 25 different languages.

Judging from what we've seen so far, I'd say it's actually "I love loving roller coasters" :gonk:

Bobbin Threadbare
Jan 2, 2009

I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

The rest of the night passed slowly. After securing Calloway's computer, Detective Black recorded statements from all the witnesses still present, then headed to the hospital and got another set from those who could manage a conversation. Black couldn't help but cringe at the state some of the customers were left in, and that was simply from wood and glass shrapnel. What would happen to these people if the roller coaster monster intended to kill them? Then, as if to answer his question, the detective was sent to respond to another call several miles beyond the metro area where a farm hand had reported seeing a giant red monster eat one of the farm's bulls. Black knew the roller coaster train had struck again the moment he arrived, even before he saw the red-stained ground speckled with viscera where a bull had once stood, and before the farm hand explained how he had unloaded three shells of buckshot to no effect.

The sun was rising when Detective Black finally headed home, much to his irritation. Sleepless nights were hardly foreign to anyone in the Paranatural Department, but it had been months since the last vampirism outbreak and Black's recent caseload had been nothing but psychics and sorcerers with sense enough to sleep at night, and so the detective had had time to appreciate a diurnal sleep schedule of his own. His wife had appreciated it, too, although his teenage daughter was at the stage where she could care less where her father was at any given time.

Still, the footwork had definitely been worth it. Black reviewed the creature attributes in his head as he tried to sleep through the morning light and then again when he returned to the main office that afternoon. First, the roller coaster train was extremely strong, as strong as a few tons of steel would lead one to believe, but it was also agile and silent when it needed to be ("well oiled," as Black put it). Second, the creature obviously needed to eat meat, meaning it had enough organic parts under the steel skin that it might just be vulnerable if they could find something to penetrate; buckshot, as the farm hand had proven, simply wasn't enough. Fourth, the thing was fast; putting together the timing of incidents and dividing by the distance of the farm to the bar, Black found that it must have run over a hundred miles an hour cross-country to be in both places at once.

The remaining facts were unconfirmed. The train was likely connected somehow to amusement parks; Black had noticed when checking his map that the bar was actually just a few miles away from Mystic Park, the city's only such attraction, and the farm attack hadn't been much farther. Better by far, however, was the name Black had. The two men whose bottles had burst and shredded their hands were speaking with a third at the time, a man named Rodney who had only just gotten a job of roller coaster engineer at the park earlier that day. In fact, the pair were jokingly disparaging the attraction when the bottles broke, and Rodney claimed to feel sick and left shortly afterward; even more damning, the monster only appeared after he had left. Black thought it all too coincidental that an unregistered psychic with a connection to Mystic Park just happened to miss seeing a previously unknown monster attack a bar where he had been insulted.

Sadly, neither victim could remember Rodney's last name, and the officers Black had set to trace license plates from the cars in the bar parking lot had yet to turn anything up, leaving the detective feeling ineffective as he sat staring at his computer screen.

Suddenly, a new thought occurred to him, and he pulled up Mystic Park's website. Sure enough, their grand opening for the year just happened to be today. It was only a hunch, but Detective Black had a feeling that if a roller coaster beast was going to turn up anywhere that evening, it would be at Mystic Park.

Bobbin Threadbare fucked around with this message at 19:48 on Apr 28, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Bobbin Threadbare I am loving your ~*~Fanfiction~*~ which is leagues better than this atrocity of a book.

Too bad I am going to have to point out that the next incident was at a carnival, not at Mystic Park. Despite being just a carnival they still managed to have a portable roller coaster with them.

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?
:spergin::science: Time, Vol. 6!

This one was a doozy. I've never put so much science in a coaster bust (tentative title) before, I had to get some help from a science friend just researching the topic. Oh, the things I'll do for Miranda!
This one's a continuation of the previous analysis, where we confirmed the natural suspicion of Railrunner hitting the bottom of the ocean hard, despite what Miss Leek claimed. So, normally, you'd think that this would be the end of that? Just another entry of the ongoing list of roller coaster-favored physics Miranda keeps unleashing at us, right?
"You're wrong!", exclaims the lone and purely hypothetical admirer of Miranda's work. "Roller Coasters from Amusement Park Between have super strength, they could easily support their weight despite having the buoyancy of a rock!" Well, since roller coasters are known for pulling stuff straight out of their probably leathery asses, this claim seems valid enough to observe more carefully.

So, we established that Railrunner doesn't have the density required to float through his sheer buoyancy alone, but that doesn't mean there isn't some level of buoyancy going on. There is, it's just not great enough to withstand the pull of gravity. But what if Railrunner was using his muscular axle arms to propel himself upwards? Can the combined efforts of buoyancy and his super strength overcome gravity? Let's find out.
So, first of all, we need to determine the effective gravity pulling RR down. His normal gravitational pull towards the earth is 89136 Newton, and his buoyancy force is 59821 Newton, leaving us with an effective gravity of 29312 Newtons. If we take the force he can generate to accelerate to top speeds we calculated – 811019 Newtons – we know that he can accelerate himself with 86.17 m/s^2 – quite enough to keep himself afloat.
But here's where it gets iffy. While getting his back full of water isn't as much of an issue as I anticipated (remember, he can't exceed a downwards pull of 89136 Newton, which he can easily overpower), there is one important factor I neglected to include so far: the resistance of water. In the analysis of Railrunner's acceleration when running, I assumed RR would be running on a idealized surface with zero elasticity, where no energy is lost in the ground. However, as some goon pointed out back then, that is in fact not the case in the real world. Real ground gives. If RR was running on grass, he'd root his leg deep into the ground. This applies even more so in water, which, as a fluid, offers little resistance against force so movement is massively gimped.
In order to determine his actual pushing power, we'll need the surface area he's using to paddle, his feet. I can't determine the exact area of his feet, so I'll have to cheat a little to make an approximation. By figuring out the diameter of his wheels and assuming his palm is square, we get a surface of about 53 square centimeters. Times 36, that equals 1.92 square meters.
Next up, we need a particular equation to determine the drag force of an object submerged in a fluid. Assuming Railrunner moves his arm downwards for a second and by simplifying the drag coefficency of his foot to that of a short cylinder, we get an actual force of propulsion of about 11586 Newton. Not bad, but when subtracted with the remaining gravitational force of 29312 Newton, there's still a whole 17726 Newton that say roller coasters stay down, even the Mary Sue kind. And this is without considering the drag of his massive torso. He might be able to leap on the bottom of the river, but honestly, Railrunner should stick to "land and rails".

Of course, Railrunner could always just stretch to decrease his density, so everything I just said wouldn't matter.


What do you think? Should I make those shorter, or are you okay with some padding? Should I include more formulas, or get straight to the point? Do you even read them at all?
I crave for your approval. :ohdear:

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
So, Railrunner is a coaster submariner?

Jeek
Feb 15, 2012

horriblePencilist posted:

What do you think? Should I make those shorter, or are you okay with some padding? Should I include more formulas, or get straight to the point? Do you even read them at all?

I am okay with the length, please include some formulas as I don't know enough physics to figure out the figures (:rimshot:) on my own, and I read every single one of your updates. :glomp:

Bobbin Threadbare
Jan 2, 2009

I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

Iced Cocoa posted:

Too bad I am going to have to point out that the next incident was at a carnival, not at Mystic Park. Despite being just a carnival they still managed to have a portable roller coaster with them.

There may be some changes from the base material. Railrunner didn't murder five officers in the first portion, for instance.

where the red fern gropes
Aug 24, 2011


He has gravity control since he descended upwards. And also, it doesn't matter that Thunderdog asked him to stay outside because he can hear everything - that's another of his powers.

I wonder if we should make bets as to what power he gets next. I am going to go with "time manipulation", since it's not ridiculous enough already.

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?
Place your bets!



Bonus: Miranda complaining about people complaining about sexualized anthros.

Bonus 2: This barely legible poster says Miranda published Twisted when she was 16. The Amazon page of the book claims she wrote it "with the tender age of 17". :psyduck:

Bonus 3: Miranda is doing a QnA. At least ask her semi-serious questions, the least we want is some goons cyberbullying her leading into the subsequent gassing of the thread.

horriblePencilist fucked around with this message at 09:54 on Apr 29, 2013

JosephWongKS
Apr 4, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo

horriblePencilist posted:

Bonus 3: Miranda is doing a QnA. At least ask her semi-serious questions, the least we want is some goons cyberbullying her leading into the subsequent gassing of the thread.

Please don't participate in her Q n A session or otherwise communicate directly with her. This has been a fun thread and I'd hate to see it get closed down because of people breaking the safari rules.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

horriblePencilist posted:


Bonus 2: This barely legible poster says Miranda published Twisted when she was 16. The Amazon page of the book claims she wrote it "with the tender age of 17". :psyduck:


She just recently celebrated her 21st birthday. I think the deal is that she published it at 18 years old, but began writing it when she was 16 or so. And I think in one of her previous Q&A she revealed she had the idea when she was fourteen.

Now, what could exactly spark the idea of anthropomorhpic roller coasters? She was apparently reading about them or something, and found out that in order to find micro-fractures invisible to the naked eye, roller coasters were ultra-sounded.

So for her, ultrasound = pregnancy. Hell if I'm going to link that ultrasound drawing again.

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?

JosephWongKS posted:

Please don't participate in her Q n A session or otherwise communicate directly with her. This has been a fun thread and I'd hate to see it get closed down because of people breaking the safari rules.

I'm not saying we should rush in and post poo poo like "Why are you so godawful?", I just figured this would be an oppertunity to clear up "misconceptions" we have about the book. We don't have to reference SA or this thread, after all.

Iced Cocoa posted:

She just recently celebrated her 21st birthday. I think the deal is that she published it at 18 years old, but began writing it when she was 16 or so. And I think in one of her previous Q&A she revealed she had the idea when she was fourteen.

Now, what could exactly spark the idea of anthropomorhpic roller coasters? She was apparently reading about them or something, and found out that in order to find micro-fractures invisible to the naked eye, roller coasters were ultra-sounded.

So for her, ultrasound = pregnancy. Hell if I'm going to link that ultrasound drawing again.

I... What? That's how she got the idea? Not years of mockery and sexual frustration combined with her fascination with roller coasters?



She really went all out on designing her precious roller coasters. Not visual design, since they're buttugly, but her explanations as to why they are overpowered superstars of Amusement Park Between.


Miranda posted:

Twisted Roller Coasters:

1. Nobelist and most powerful of all the rides.
2. Heavyset, but fast and smart.
3. Brawny - steel skin and bones. Indestructible.
4. Speaks several languages.
5. Amazing senses.
6. Rulers of Between
7. Body structure built for speed, agility, climbing, and combat.

JosephWongKS
Apr 4, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo
Chapter 20 - Moonlit Conversation

quote:


The wind whistled outside the old swamp house. The crickets and frogs sang their songs in a chorus that echoed through the night. Soft dappled moonlight beamed down from the high window onto me. Tonight was sleepless, my mind was full and my stomach was empty. My continuing thoughts and growling belly kept me awake. Thunderbark however, was fast asleep in the opposite corner, his nose buried behind his tail.


“A place from the most imaginative mind,” wrote the author in Chapter 19, before proceeding to populate said place with fauna, terrain and celestial bodies no different from that found in the “real world”.


quote:


I let out a long sigh and stood up carefully so I didn’t awake anyone.


What is it about sighing that so fascinates Miranda Leek?

Also, letting out a “long sigh” is hardly conducive to “not waking up anyone”.


quote:


I slowly walked out onto the dock and bent down to peer at the surface of the water. Fish sounded good; besides, it was meat. I glanced back at the house, and then silently slithered into the water.

The warm indulging liquid surrounded me as my eyes adjusted to “water vision”. The swamp was dark, but I could see everything. I glided trough [sic] the water, scanning for signs of life. I dove to the bottom, brushing the sandy floor. I then caught the sight of shimmering scales. I looked at the fish as it came out of the shadows. It was big, it looked like a cross of a catfish and shark, making the grey fish look very primitive.


“A place from the most imaginative mind,” wrote the author whose best attempt at describing an alien species is “a cross of Animal X and Animal Y”.


quote:


I watched it swim forward carelessly, and then when it turned its head away, I bolted forward like lightning.

The fish darted at the last second, but I was still not far behind. My predatory instinct took over, I found myself swimming faster. The fish was losing ground and precious time. It then turned and swam toward the dock; I rushed upon it, my mouth open wide. My dagger-like teeth snagged its flesh; I surfaced, with the fish grasped in my jaws. I looked up to see Moonhoof standing on the dock before me, her pale eyes bearing into mine.


Why does a roller-coaster have “predatory instincts”? Why do they feel hunger? Why do they need to eat? Why? Why?!


quote:


“I was just looking for you, Railrunner. I wanted to speak with you. Sorry that I interrupted your hunt.” She smiled.

“Don’t worry about it,” I said lying [sic] the dead fish out onto the dock as I climbed out of the water. I began to tear it to shreds; my hunger got the better of me. When there were only bones left I turned to see Moonhoof looking a little sickened.

“Sorry, I haven’t eaten anything all day.” I admitted wiping the blood away.

“You are fine! Come, I must discuss a few things with you.”

“All right,” I said following her.

The wooden dock let out loud creaks as we walked. I wondered what Moonhoof wanted to speak to me about. It had to be important if she had been searching for me.

“Railrunner, you are the only thing that has returned hope to our land. I want to talk to you about some things that only a red is capable of.”


Amusement Park Between’s last, best hope: A primitive, murderous, sociopathic monster driven purely by instincts and brute hunger.


quote:


“Really?” I questioned.

“Yes, a red roller coaster has the ability to perform continuous concussion beams, but in this world only.”


Oh, I give up. Of course he gets to do continuous concussion beams. Why the hell not?


quote:


“Is that true? It won’t completely drain the energy from me?” I asked surprised.

“Yes. Here you have unlimited energy, especially because you bare [sic] the Augu Ra.” She said as we entered her cave.

“Is there anything else I should know?”

“A mouth can only speak so many words at once, nor are its words remembered to their fullest; a book however, tells a much different story.”

“So-.” I began only to watch Moonhoof pull out a dust covered box from atop one of the shelves. She then used the key that hung around her neck and opened the locked chest. The carousel horse pulled out a really old book and handed it to me.

“This will teach everything that you wish to know. It is called the Veradagashi, in other words the book of the red roller coaster. It was written by the very first red, if you have a question or need extra advice that
Thunderbark cannot teach you. Refer to this book.”

“Cool,” I said while thumbing through it. Problem was, it was all written in that bizarre language! But then I saw a translator in the back, relieving me from my worries.


The introduction of an obstacle, followed by its immediate resolution in the same sentence. Truly Miranda Leek has mastered the art of writing like Mookie “Dominic Deegan” Terraciano.


quote:


“Now there is something else, Railrunner. Did Thunderbark ever tell you where the residents of Amusement Park Between come from?”

“He hasn’t yet.” I realized.

“All right, well the rides here come from being tossed aside in the real world. When they have worn out their life there, they are put aside by humans. They lie in rest, doomed they seem, until they are given a new life in Amusement Park Between.”

“So, I was once a regular old roller coaster that nobody wanted?”

“No, not you. Defiantly [sic] not a red. No ride knows where the red comes from. They say the only rides that know are roller coasters, and you might want to ask Thunderbark that.”

“I’ll make sure of it.”

“Good, now there are some rides you should know about. The worst of all the rides. They are the ones, who were either destroyed or were involved in a deadly calamity. They are known as The Fallens.”

Fallens, that suited them well. Like angels cast down from heaven for their errors, becoming damned souls cursed to walk the earth living a life of evil. Fallen rides were living in their own personal hell, forced to take out their anger on the ones who did them wrong. Just like fallen angels.


So Railrunner is a “Fallen”. Good to know that.


quote:


“Glad to know that.” I replied after my brief thinking.

“Another thing before I bid you good night, you and your friends will be traveling through various cities and villages on your journey. Railrunner, if the Fallen see your flaming red metal all hell will break lose. So, here is a trench coat and vest that should cover you and keep everyone out of harms way. You don’t have to wear it all the time, just when you go through a town.”


He’s going to get a fedora and a Hanzo steel katana next, isn’t he?


quote:


“Good,” I said gathering my stuff together.

“One more thing before you leave!”

“Yes?”

“Take this,” she said handing me a vile [sic] full of a dark blue liquid. “Use this only as a last resort when you are battling Ironwheel!”

I thanked her and took the vile [sic] and wrapped it in the trench coat . I said good night and headed back towards the swamp house. Then I got to thinking, was Ironwheel one of the Fallen? If he was, could he have been somehow tortured by humans in the real world? Badly enough that he wanted revenge on them?


No, really, how can a “Fallen” be any worse than Railrunner and Thunderbark so far?

JosephWongKS
Apr 4, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo
List of Railrunner’s powers

Chapter 4
1. Remotely shatter glass
2. Possesses claws that are 15-inch long and perfectly sharp

Chapter 5
3. Ability to run “faster than a car at top speed”
4. Can “hear anything and everything”
5. Heightened stealth

Chapter 7
6. Bend lightning
7. Bend fire
8. Super strength
9. Super agility
10. Predict when things will happen, except death
11. Sense trouble
12. Never get sick
13. Venomous
14. Sight of a dragon
15. Gain power from amusement parks and carnivals
16. Control the speed of rides and how long they last

Chapter 10
17. Healing factor

Chapter 11
18. Immunity to bullets

Chapter 12
19. Can change at will if wearing the Augu Ra
20. Can move between the worlds when wearing the Augu Ra

Chapter 13
21. Can fire concussion beams

Chapter 14
22. Bend metal

Chapter 15
23. Bend blood
24. See in the dark
25. Heightened sense of smell

Chapter 16
26. Shrink at will to fit into confined spaces
27. Control gravity so that they can "descend up"
28. Breathe “icy mist” that reveals infra-red sensors
29. Walk on walls and ceilings
30. Fall and land quietly on his wheels

Chapter 18
31. Become “engrossed” by the sight of violence
32. Disintegrate people with his McGuffin

Chapter 19
33. Nictitating membranes over his eyes
34. Can hold his breath for more than thirty minutes
35. Bend water

Chapter 20
36. Fire "continuous concussion beams" in Amusement Park Between

JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 13:56 on Apr 29, 2013

JosephWongKS
Apr 4, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo
List of damage caused by Railrunner and his gang of psychopathic monsters

Chapter 4
1. Shattered the beer bottles being held by his friends Buddy and Sly, injuring their hands
2. Killed a cat
3. Wrecked the ambulance that came in response to Buddy and Sly's injuries
4. Wrecked a bar, killing at least 1 civilian
5. Attacked the bar-owner
6. Attacked the police officers who came in response to the chaos, killing 5 of them

Chapter 5
7. Killed and ate a bull

Chapter 8
8. Attacked his girlfriend Clare

Chapter 9
9. Attacked Detective Black when he jumped in front of Clare to defend her from Railrunner's assault
10. Ran through the carnival, destroying nearly everything in his path, from toppling over small rides to completely obliterating food stands
11. Killed and ate a "fat black and white dairy cow"
12. Attacked and killed a SWAT officer who came in response to the chaos
13. Attacked his girlfriend Clare again
14. Attacked Detective Black again
15. Tried to attack Thunderbark with lightning

Chapter 11
16. Cold-bloodedly murdered a gang of thugs who had accosted Clare but who had swiftly surrendered after seeing Railrunner's were-roller-coaster form
17. Attacked a pair of police officers who had come in response to a report of armed robbery in the area
18. Pushed large trucks out of his way while chasing the abovementioned police officers on the road, presumably causing multiple vehicle collisions

Chapter 13
19. Killed a police officer by biting him in the neck
20. Killed another police officer by deflecting a bullet back into the police officer
21. Caused mass destruction to a group of police officers by firing a “concussion beam”
22. Flattened some more police officers by “flipping their cruisers” and crushing them underneath

Chapter 15
23. Cruelly destroyed a mouse by manipulating the metal in its blood
24. Inflicted a minor injury on Detective Black
25. Slammed a few police offices on to a wall
26. Smashed a few more police officers with his tail
27. Knocked out a police officer by popping open his restraint
28. Attempted to crush a FBI captain by throwing a police car at him

Chapter 16
29. Broke into a museum and stole a piece of jewellery known as the Augu Ra

Chapter 18
30. Threw a dog into a tree, knocking it out (Thunderbark)
31. Destroyed a ferris wheel by climbing onto and then jumping off it with all of twenty thousand pounds of weight
32. Threw an armored truck at a group of police officers, hitting “several squad cars and policemen”
33. Broke off a light post and used it as a bat, breaking bones and smashing cars
34. Stabbed police officers with her “unicorn-like horn” (Merrylegs)
35. Stung people “as if they were a scorpion’s prey” (Static)
36. Disintegrated a row of police officers with his McGuffin
37. Struck down an FBI captain with a lightning bolt (Thunderbark)

Chapter 20
38. Killed and ate a fish

Jeek
Feb 15, 2012

horriblePencilist posted:

I'm not saying we should rush in and post poo poo like "Why are you so godawful?", I just figured this would be an oppertunity to clear up "misconceptions" we have about the book. We don't have to reference SA or this thread, after all.

On one hand, there are some points that needs to be clarified by the author:

- Is every ride in all carnivals of "the real world" actually murderous monsters? Does that mean people can never take a safe carnival rides at night?
- The pictures suggest that the rollercoasters do procreate. I assume people would get suspicious if a rollercoaster swells up and a tiny one appears months later.
- Rodney is obviously over 20 years old but the latest chapters said that Railrunner is "no more than a week old". Does that mean Rodney is actually fully human before that other rollercoaster converted him or something?

On the other hand, goons will surely ruin the whole thing with fine questions like "How many rollercoasters have you hosed :downswords:", so it seems that these questions will be forever unanswered. :smith:

Voltin Bolt
Oct 17, 2004

IT DOES NOT FIX
I like how all of the art of carousel horses shows them with normal hooves, yet they are totally able to thumb through books and handle keys etc.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

quote:

“Good, now there are some rides you should know about. The worst of all the rides. They are the ones, who were either destroyed or were involved in a deadly calamity. They are known as The Fallens.”

Fallens, that suited them well. Like angels cast down from heaven for their errors, becoming damned souls cursed to walk the earth living a life of evil. Fallen rides were living in their own personal hell, forced to take out their anger on the ones who did them wrong. Just like fallen angels.

This part, this goddamn part broke me. I actually went back to chapter 18 at that point just to be sure that Railrunner destroyed a ferris wheel. He did destroy a ferris wheel and created a Fallen in Amusement Park Between. It's his fault.

And he'll never see it. He created a demonic being who will never have any thought other than to oppress and torture other rides, while how it was destroyed was beyond its control. What the gently caress is this morality system? How does it even work? No chance at salvation for situation out of your control? While Railrunner "toppled" over few other rides while at the carnival, that Ferris Wheel will come up again. Notice how Railrunner has not a single thought towards his destruction in the carnival or destroying the ferris wheel. He doesn't care one iota. Miranda doesn't care one iota that Railrunner created a demon. He's loving blaming it on being destroyed and turned into a demon!

:suicide:

That ferris wheel appears later in the book, and there we'll see how he feels about destroying it.

Edit: drat it do not ask Miranda those questions. The only sane question spawned from this thread that could be asked is the proper timeline of the whole "thought of/began writing/published" given that there is so much conflicting information anywhere.

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?
"Here, take this trenchcoat to cover your 20 foot long body in this world where no one is seen with clothes!"

Don't forget to add "Unlimited energy when in APB" to his powers!
It's funny, I considered to add "Defunct Physiology" to my power bingo, but I was like "Nahh, no way Miranda would make him that obviously overpowered!". Wait, that's not funny, that's loving stupid.

I can understand Rollercoasters eating – trust, me Miranda has this whole digestive system very well thought out – but there is no reason for Railrunner to continue eating, at least not in Amusement Park Between. If he has an infinite energy source to maintain a constant concussion blast, he should be able to go on forever.

Miranda is the least forward thinking person ever – it's like her brain doesn't have a backspace key. Every time she comes up with an idea, she HAS to include it, no matter how bad it contradicts her previous ideas. "Oh, I have to make pregnant roller coasters! But rides only come from old rides in the real world, so I'll say only the Chosen Ones are birthed! Oh, and they can travel to the real world! And they are superior to humans in every way! But they hide from the humans, because Harry Potter has the best Call to Action ever! Oh, and roller coasters can cast fire! And lightning! And poison! And ice! And they have wheels for fingers! And their wheels can turn into a claw that can cut through everything because they're super-sharp!"

Edit: You shoud really read Miranda's Journals on deviantArt. They're hilarious.

horriblePencilist fucked around with this message at 14:13 on Apr 29, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

horriblePencilist posted:

"Here, take this trenchcoat to cover your 20 foot long body in this world where no one is seen with clothes!"

Don't forget to add "Unlimited energy when in APB" to his powers!
It's funny, I considered to add "Defunct Physiology" to my power bingo, but I was like "Nahh, no way Miranda would make him that obviously overpowered!". Wait, that's not funny, that's loving stupid.

I can understand Rollercoasters eating – trust, me Miranda has this whole digestive system very well thought out – but there is no reason for Railrunner to continue eating, at least not in Amusement Park Between. If he has an infinite energy source to maintain a constant concussion blast, he should be able to go on forever.

And a huge spoiler to this atrocity, at least for those who have never gone to Miranda's Deviantart Account.

Spoilers!

Don't get me started on the digestive system. I was going to do a writeup on it later but what the hell, since you brought it up.

They don't poop.

Instead of a colon or a butthole of any kind, there is a furnace. Where every "waste material" is put in and it is converted to energy that radiates throughout the body of the roller coaster. Another non-SA friend of mine watching this thread commented that to do that they have to destroy the very atoms to convert matter into energy in that manner, as both fusion and fission always leave a mass of some matter.

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?
Even better, if you poison a rollercoaster, there's no way it'll ever leave his system.
Maybe that's why rollercoasters die so fast, all the hazardous substances they consume pile up over the year until they eventually die of food poisoning.

crime weed
Nov 9, 2009

Iced Cocoa posted:

Instead of a colon or a butthole of any kind, there is a furnace. Where every "waste material" is put in and it is converted to energy that radiates throughout the body of the roller coaster. Another non-SA friend of mine watching this thread commented that to do that they have to destroy the very atoms to convert matter into energy in that manner, as both fusion and fission always leave a mass of some matter.
Nah, they're just constantly farting. Permanently. Forever.

Must smell awful.

paragon1
Nov 22, 2010

FULL COMMUNISM NOW
Everything about this book is terrible and dumb. Why would the local PD call the FBI a giant monster anyway? Why not the Army? Why does the FBI have rocket launchers? Railrunner is lucky no one thought to get some armor piercing rounds from the local National Guard depot.

Decoy Badger
May 16, 2009

Wouldn't Railrunner be able to use his entire flat train body to propel himself like a watersnake? That's quite a bit of surface area, I'd imagine he would be able to develop enough thrust to pull himself through anything but air (until we learn that he can fly).

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?

Decoy Badger posted:

Wouldn't Railrunner be able to use his entire flat train body to propel himself like a watersnake? That's quite a bit of surface area, I'd imagine he would be able to develop enough thrust to pull himself through anything but air (until we learn that he can fly).

Goddammit, just when I thought I'd get a break from science. Now I have to research sea snake movement.

Edit:
I asked Miranda about the age thing. Turns out she did write it with 17, and that poster is a typo. Also, this:



She can't even be bothered to spellcheck her website.

horriblePencilist fucked around with this message at 18:16 on Apr 29, 2013

Rahonavis
Jan 11, 2012

"Clevuh gurrrl..."

Iced Cocoa posted:

Spoilers!

Don't get me started on the digestive system. I was going to do a writeup on it later but what the hell, since you brought it up.

They don't poop.

Instead of a colon or a butthole of any kind, there is a furnace. Where every "waste material" is put in and it is converted to energy that radiates throughout the body of the roller coaster. Another non-SA friend of mine watching this thread commented that to do that they have to destroy the very atoms to convert matter into energy in that manner, as both fusion and fission always leave a mass of some matter.

Twisted is officially the place where the laws of physics go to die.

Anyway, have some fanart of Moonhoof. I worked wicked hard on it, I hope everybody likes it:

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?

Rahonavis posted:

Twisted is officially the place where the laws of physics go to die.

Anyway, have some fanart of Moonhoof. I worked wicked hard on it, I hope everybody likes it:



Funny you should attach this picture, because not only does Miranda hate ponies, she prides herself on being original. In fact, the fact of her fursona being "unique" is more important to her than the disturbing reality of drawing angular dragon lizards with seats on their back.

Miranda, defending her character Angeltrack (Protip: Do not look up her character Angeltrack) posted:

My art is ORIGINAL. It is unique. Take the time to examine it before you make any assumptions. Get used to the fact that everything is not ponies, sonic characters, or anime. In fact, in the job field such as illustration in the REAL art world - that poo poo will get you nowhere. Companies will just laugh in your face and send you out the door. When hiring, they want original concepts.

Oh, another fun thing about her:

Miranda, upon being asked about what she dislikes about deviantArt posted:

ughh... All the nude photos that are not artistic nudity but are porn[...]

Miranda, continuing to defend Angeltrack in a Journal entry right after the previous one posted:

There is a big difference between porn and nude art. The definition of porn is images that display sexual acts such as the insertion of genitalia or the display of genitalia as the viewer can see all the parts. Artistic nudity is NOT. I hate immature people that imitatively assume that a just a bit of bare skin, a seated or standing nude is porn. GUESS WHAT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BOYS AND GIRLS, if you are one of those people and you are actually serious about pursuing art as a career and plan to go to an art institute - no matter where you go, it is required that you take a figure drawing course (Yes, you are made to draw the artistic nude and you learn about the nude in art. And yes, you will see plenty of breasts, balls, vaginas, and penises. So grow up and get used to it.)
Keep in mind she's never actually drawn genitalia, only exposed breasts at best. In fact, male rollercoasters completely lack any reproductive organs, as Miranda only reluctantly reveals:

Miranda, only partially explaining the difference between male and female rollercoasters posted:

lol don't ask me about private areas. I'll simply laugh at my screen. It will be explained in part 2.
She probably is scared shitless of dicks.


Bonus: Here's a picture of Railrunner with his trenchcoat and vest on.

YEP, NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW HE'S THE RED ROLLERCOASTER!

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

horriblePencilist posted:




Bonus: Here's a picture of Railrunner with his trenchcoat and vest on.

YEP, NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW HE'S THE RED ROLLERCOASTER!

Why does our valiant rage-monster need/have a gun and how does his tire-finger fit through the trigger guard?

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

horriblePencilist posted:

YEP, NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW HE'S THE RED ROLLERCOASTER!

Of course no one will know, since he will have a hood on! :suicide:

Phummus posted:

Why does our valiant rage-monster need/have a gun and how does his tire-finger fit through the trigger guard?
It's a weapon just for the red roller coaster, It can also change into a spear which he's holding here. I'm spoiling this because it won't come up in Twisted! It appear for some reason in Vertigo and I have a feeling that the Hanzo Steel Katana Railrunner gets in Twisted will be replaced by that spear/gun/whatever in the revised edition.

Seraphic Neoman
Jul 19, 2011


I have no words. They all collided with each other in my head and exploded into a sort of mad tranquility.

Hooo-okay...

-He gets a trenchcoat. From a voodoo shaman. A rollercoaster gets a trenchcoat from a voodoo shaman carousel horse. This is beyond just nuts this is psychedelic territory. Like we have exceeded "I am the eggman" levels of absurdity.

-MORE POWERS!

-No coaster loving. Huh.

And seriously nobody loving participate in Q&A and otherwise talk to Miranda. gently caress's sake guys. Keep all the poo poo in this thread. Something tells me she'll find it soon enough anyway.


horriblePencilist posted:

I... What? That's how she got the idea? Not years of mockery and sexual frustration combined with her fascination with roller coasters?

Nope that's still there. You gotta realize, she is loving fixated on preggo coasters (...I wrote that). Just check he DA. She took an innocent idea, using ultrasound to find cracks in rollercoasters, connected it to pregnancy and then went loving mental with it.

Bobbin Threadbare
Jan 2, 2009

I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

Detective Black entered Mystic Park loaded for bear. The Captain wouldn't allow Black to reassign any police officers based on a hunch, but he did promise to keep a few SWAT teams on high alert just in case, plus he couldn't stop him from following up in person, so the detective made sure to arm himself for a worst-case scenario.

Black's first stop at the park was to alert their security personnel to be on the lookout for someone suspicious. "Your guards will not be able to handle this one themselves," Black warned their chief. "Tasers and pepper spray are unlikely to work at all, and should not be attempted. Instead, have them radio in and I will personally evaluate whether it's the man we're looking for. If I say it is, call Central; they'll know what to send." He then provided them with Rodney's description: an unkempt man in his mid twenties with dark hair, average build and height, and several gold piercings in his ears, lip, and left eyebrow. Feeling a bit too old to patrol the park on foot, Detective Black settled in at the security station and waited.

Still, the detective was kept on edge thanks to the anxious security staff's constant false alarms. "I'm sorry about them, detective," Chief Lugo apologized as he drove the pair back to the office after the fifth false positive. "We're always a bit nervous on Opening Day; we always figure something will happen when the crowds are thickest, so when you showed up and told us there really might be someone..."

"No, I understand," Black responded. "Your men have every right to be nervous. I'd tell you what my guy's suspected of doing, but it'd only make things worse. Besides, he's only wanted for questioning at the moment." He paused to wipe some of the drizzling rain off his face. "At least the weather's keeping most folks at home today."

Lugo nodded. "The crowds are about as light as I've seen them on Opening Day, although they're still a pretty good size for any other time. I just hope for your sake it keeps up like this."

Unfortunately, as the day advanced, the clouds thinned out and broke up, providing the detective with a brilliant sunset he only wished he could properly appreciate. Sure enough, despite the approach of evening, the crowds began to grow in size and with them the reports of "suspicious individuals," eventually forcing Detective Black to demand a positive ID on the gold piercings before he would bother to leave the station. Finally, it came.

"Confirmed on the gold left eyebrow stud," the guard's voice crackled over the radio. "Suspect is with a woman, looks to be on a date. Suspect is acting mighty uncomfortable, the woman is just about dragging him along. They're under the southern loop of the Twist & Spin, looks like she wants him to get in line."

"That's the roller coaster in the middle of the park," Lugo explained. "We can get there on foot in under a minute if we hustle. Keep us updated, Mags," he added into his walkie-talkie.

Before long, the two men joined the security guard just outside the blue steel beams and watched as a personal drama unfolded between the suspect and his girlfriend. "You sure we shouldn't intervene? Looks like he might be sick with something," Mags whispered.

Detective Black's eyes never wavered from the man he now knew for certain was named Rodney Philips. "If he's sick with something, then you really don't want to get close," he warned. "Call Central. Tell them I found the guy we're looking for, and they need to send everything they can right here, right now." Lugo hesitated, but as Rodney began to grow and tear his way out of his clothes, bones audibly popping as he screamed in pain from the transformation, Mags and the security chief turned and ran as fast as their legs would take them. Black only hoped one of them would have enough sense left to make the call.

In the meantime, Rodney's screams became a terrible, mindless laugh as the beast within him took over. Although the crowd noise had prevented him from hearing the man argue with his girlfriend, Clare, the other patrons were now shocked into total silence, leaving nothing beyond the eerily clattering roller coaster above to compete with the monster's booming voice: "It's Railrunner now." The train let loose a mad howl at the moon and lunged at his former companion.

Fortunately for her, Detective Black had been busy. As Rodney was transforming, Black pulled a tiny rifle out of an inner pocket. On its own it would never have been confused with a real firearm, being a perfect replica of a Browning BLR no bigger than the length of his hand. By slapping on a patch produced from another pocket, however, the weapon grew in size until it reached full scale. Black levered in the first round: steel cored, silver tipped, and several calibers bigger than the barrel's width would normally allow; fudging such details was just one advantage to working with magic-users.

Realizing what would be coming after the howl, Black charged forward and knocked Clare out of the way just before the crazed roller coaster train could strike. As it turned its attention to the detective, Black brought his rifle up to his shoulder and fired. However, the bullet which could bring a werewolf to a dead stop from a hundred yards failed to even scratch the creature's red paint, leaving only a momentary spark to show where it had deflected harmlessly. Too close to dodge, the train sent Black flying with a single swipe, knocking him into one of the roller coaster support struts. Loosing another metallic screech, Railrunner again approached Clare, but as the detective watched, barely conscious, a colorful yellow pony ran in and shouted for Clare to get on. Looking as amazed as Black was, Clare clambered on and held tight to the tall brass pole that emerged from the animal's midsection. As soon as it knew she was on, the horse galloped off, faster even than the red roller coaster train could follow.

As the beast's cries grew dimmer, Black came back to his senses. Luckily his magically reinforced coat had taken the brunt of the damage, but it was now shredded beyond use, taking with it most of the remaining patches Black had brought with him; even his cigarettes had been torn to pieces. All that remained was a patch for the machete he kept as a backup, now the only weapon he had with any real chance of harming the lumbering machine. Checking his surroundings, the detective could now hear screams coming from the crowd as the security guards did their best to evacuate the park. Far in the distance, Black could also make out the welcome wail of police sirens; evidently either Lugo or Mags had managed to do their job after all. Deciding discretion was the better part of valor, Black limped to the nearest electric security car and had the driver get him back to his personal vehicle so he could call in and describe what he had seen.

For a while, Detective Black was content to sit back in his car, pull some cigarettes from the pack in his glove compartment, and listen to the scanner as the police and SWAT teams took up positions around the park and then began to sweep through the center, following Railrunner's wake of destruction through the darkened rides and food shops throughout the park.

"Unit eight, checking in. All clear."

"Unit nine here. All clear by the carousel."

"Unit ten, we may have...poo poo, it's him! It's him! We're on the north side, by the--grk!"

"poo poo, gently caress! He got Harry!"

The rapid popping of a distant gunfight rolled over the parking lot, and Black found that he could no longer sit still and listen to fellow police officers die. He slapped his last patch on his machete, growing it to its proper size as he ran full tilt back into Mystic Park, a surge of adrenaline erasing his thoughts of all previous injuries. A SWAT officer objected as he crossed the police perimeter, but by that point the only thing the detective could hear was the blood pumping through his veins.

Black caught up with Railrunner in a cul-de-sac of food merchants. Bodies, some uniformed and some not, were scattered across the pavement, and the train was gorging itself on a freezer full of turkey legs torn from behind a wooden stand. The heavy steel stove had been thrown twenty feet to one side, the still-warm burners lighting the thin, dry grass just beneath a stand of trees. Wasting no time, Detective Black crept over to the relative cover of a row of pillars and moved as quietly as he could to the gluttonous monster. However, before he could get close enough to strike, Railrunner's head snapped up and spun around, turning to stare directly into Black's eyes. "You smell angry," it rumbled, an insane grin displaying all the various bits of fractured bone and frozen meat that covered the creature's lips and teeth. Black lifted his weapon to attack anyway, but the train's arm shot forward, too fast to follow, and gripped his wrist between its hard plastic wheels. Railrunner lifted the detective off the ground and laughed once again, sprinkling his face with raw meat and flecks of burning hot spittle, and then tossed him casually away. Black flew into a pillar head first, and knew no more.

Bobbin Threadbare fucked around with this message at 04:31 on Apr 30, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011


I can't get enough of your writing Bobbin Threadbare. Are you published? It it available on Amazon Kindle? Because if Miranda's junk can be found on Amazon, you should have something too. You're so creative, especially with that shrinking/expanding gun. Not too much power, but still enough to be situational.

horriblePencilist
Oct 18, 2012

It's a Dirt Devil!
Get it?

SSNeoman posted:

And seriously nobody loving participate in Q&A and otherwise talk to Miranda. gently caress's sake guys. Keep all the poo poo in this thread. Something tells me she'll find it soon enough anyway.

Actually, she once found out popular tumblr sociallyunacceptableart posted one of of her :nws: rollercoasters, which supposedly triggered an attention surge towards her work. Her response was the usual "just a bunch of trolls, you're just jealous, I'm laughing my rear end off, neener neener"-reaction you'd expect from a deviantArt user.

My favorite part:

Doctor Leek posted:

Sure, existing franchises have characters that everyone can identify and relate. Then if they see something new, they usually greet it with a negative attitude. But take the time to get to know the new concept, you might actually get to like it. There is no reason to dislike something at first sight - kind of like green eggs and ham.
:smuggo: "Sure, you could have characters in situations you can relate to, but wouldn't you rather have socially defunct, psychopathic anthropomorphic roller coasters killing innocent people, animals and rides alike? I read Doctor Seuss."

So really, should Miranda discover SA, she probably won't be any more angry than she already has been. If anything, she'll "laugh at the screen" because someone actually bought her book. The only reason I can see this thread pissing her more off because of the neatly organized evidence and bonus content stacked against her book. It's like a 3-disc DVD, with 1 disc being the movie, and the other 2 hours of trailers, promotional art, deleted scenes, bloopers, interviews, documentaries, commentary and more.

paragon1
Nov 22, 2010

FULL COMMUNISM NOW
See if you can spot the spelling error in Bobbin's post.

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crime weed
Nov 9, 2009
Could we stick to analyzing the book and not the author? I mean, analyzing aspects of the author through the book is sort of ok, but other than that...

Also, I'm gonna have to try my hand at a bit of writing soon, jeez. Everyone's gonna contribute to Black's legacy~

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