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The next chapter is pretty long so it'll take me a while to finish the review, but first I want to show you all a particular section which is the absolute shining quintessence of Miranda Leek's writing "style". * snip * EDIT: Full chapter review has been posted. JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 15:13 on May 20, 2013 |
# ? May 20, 2013 08:15 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 12:38 |
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I have to wonder what's so different about their biology that a difference like that is even possible in the first place. Maybe the spider's venom is annulled if the bitee is pure evil like our pal Rodney here?
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# ? May 20, 2013 11:08 |
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*facepalm* That's incredible. I bet these spiders never come up again. This particular Chekhov's Gun will sit on the mantlepiece for the rest of the book. alcharagia posted:I have to wonder what's so different about their biology that a difference like that is even possible in the first place. Maybe the spider's venom is annulled if the bitee is pure evil like our pal Rodney here?
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# ? May 20, 2013 11:28 |
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attackbunny posted:I think it's that they only bite Fallen at all. They're racist spiders. You mean innocent heroes that bravely slaughter hundreds of evil civilians going about their daily business.
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# ? May 20, 2013 12:03 |
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Chapter 32 - Defunct Denquote:
Said slashes were most likely inflicted by Railrunner himself, being the only creature which had attacked and tried to kill Clare in recent times. quote:
So roller-coasters bleed blood, crave meat, need oxygen (else they could swim indefinitely), and sweat. Why do creatures based on metallic constructs have every single biological need and response of carbon-based fleshy lifeforms? quote:
“Agony”. quote:
Classic Miranda Leek – always resolve tension in the same chapter it was introduced. quote:
“A place from the most imaginative mind” has “trees”, “birds”, “dew”, a “pleasant” morning atmosphere, and temperature that is “nice and warm but not to hot”. quote:
“Guess” =/= “Certain knowledge”. quote:
There are also women red roller-coasters, so there’s a measure of gender equality amongst the Mary Sues of this story. Credit where credit is due. quote:
52nd sigh of the book. quote:
Oil doesn’t “age”! quote:
Why is Thunderbark “astonished” and “astounded” by everything? Isn’t he supposed to be a wizened, hardened veteran of the roller-coaster wars? quote:
Why do roller-coasters need “energy” when merely being in Amusement Park Between gives them enough power for “unlimited concussion beams”? quote:
Holy cow, she spelt it correctly! quote:
Brace yourself - here comes the single stupidest section in the entire book. quote:
Magically racist guard-spiders whose venom are both deadly lethal and merely paralyzing until Schrodinger’s box is open. That’s it, we’ve hit peak stupidity. quote:
Now it’s a tight squeeze? After you managed to fit into museum corridors and storage rooms when you stole the McGuffin Jewel? quote:
How is a “low cell phone beep” “mesmerizing”? quote:
Miranda Leek can’t even bear to allow her “heroes” to suffer the most minor of inconveniences. Reminds me of those old Superman comics where Superman got the ability to super-weave and super-cook. quote:
Everyone amusement park character in this book, regardless of age, has the sense of wonder of a child. A child that had been dropped on the head every day since birth. quote:
The most “high tec” thing in the vault is the retinal scanner, and those have been around since 1981. quote:
A ‘VERY high tec vault” in a world with “technology that is far more advanced than any humans” has exposed pipes and doesn’t even have a proper humidifier. quote:
A world with “technology that is far more advanced than any humans” is dependent on paper maps and doesn’t have the equivalent of online or electronic maps. quote:
What good is a map that’s hundreds of years old? quote:
This comes close to the racist spiders in stupidity. quote:
The “something bad” is that this book goes on for another 30+ chapters. JosephWongKS fucked around with this message at 02:45 on May 21, 2013 |
# ? May 20, 2013 15:11 |
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JosephWongKS posted:Oil doesn’t “age”! Machine oil does age, actually; the compounds that make it effective at whatever variety it is can break down over the course of months or years. Of course, this also means that oil is better fresher, so...
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# ? May 20, 2013 18:10 |
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I'd ask "why three days exactly and always?" but really, all the roller coasters are virtually clones other than color and detailing, so naturally they have identical responses to poison.
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# ? May 20, 2013 18:46 |
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No maps. Why no maps? Why is this the only map that exists? Why would one write this kind of trash? They know the towns and the rivers, for instance Achterbahn is apparently big enough that it takes five days or so to go some part of it, so I don't even know why you could just say "go to the island in that river" and one would instantly know that the island in question is Pikachu Island. gently caress it, some things are not worth the effort thinking about. Even when they have rides that are airborn none of them apparently had the courage to fly around and map the place. JWKS, I think it is next chapter, but in the e-book I got there is a very strange typo which is even stranger than usual. Could you tell me if it is even in the printed book or not? Because it feels more like whatever conversion program used to make the e-book somehow goofed up than actual typo.
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# ? May 20, 2013 18:58 |
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quote:“I think I just had a bad dream,” I replied with my wheels still on my head. quote:Thunderbark said as he walked on all his wheels into the cave. quote:“Still Thunderbark, its antique style gives it a relaxing atmosphere,” Merrylegs said as she shut the door behind her.
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# ? May 20, 2013 20:09 |
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Pretty convenient how those toy manufacturers made a plush doll for amusement parks of every possible animal species to fill APB.Iced Cocoa posted:No maps. Why no maps? Why is this the only map that exists? Why would one write this kind of trash? They know the towns and the rivers, for instance Achterbahn is apparently big enough that it takes five days or so to go some part of it, so I don't even know why you could just say "go to the island in that river" and one would instantly know that the island in question is Pikachu Island. Are you psychic? I was gonna ask when we'd get to the part where the Coaster Gaang fights a horde of bootleg Pikachus. attackbunny posted:'my wheels still on my head' 'my fingers still on my head' Lastly, how does Amusement Park Between work? I assumed it was a parallel world, but this chapter makes it sound like it's a single island like Azeroth. Where is that island? On another planet? Somewhere hidden in the pacific?
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# ? May 20, 2013 22:01 |
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horriblePencilist posted:Lastly, how does Amusement Park Between work? I assumed it was a parallel world, but this chapter makes it sound like it's a single island like Azeroth. Where is that island? On another planet? Somewhere hidden in the pacific? It was easily missed, but it looks like that when it is 11 PM in APB, it's 11 AM in the real world. And later this rule becomes mindboggingly stupid because of the situation at hand. I'm not going to spoil it further.
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# ? May 20, 2013 22:12 |
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Special Agent Victor Captain got the warning regarding Railrunner's newfound abilities in time to disengage, but not before a number of officers were shredded the same as Detective Black. The roller coaster train was allowed to escape into the surrounding neighborhood unopposed, but Captain wasn't too worried about finding it; based on what Black told him, there was only one place it could possibly be headed. The two men sat quietly in the federal agent's car as he drove to their destination, flashing lights dimmed by tinted windows and siren muffled by layers of armor. Captain occasionally glanced at Black, worried by his periodic cringes and gasps of pain. Victor would rather have seen the detective go straight to the hospital, but Black had made it clear that it was already too late for any medical attention; being familiar with the effects of the powder he had used, Captain was forced to agree. As their car swung onto a long, straight rural highway, Detective Black broke the silence. "Thanks for the lift." Captain looked over at his passenger again. "You should probably call your wife." Black nodded and pulled out his cellphone. He selected his contact list and found his wife's number, but his finger hovered over the call button. What could he possibly say? What could he tell her? What would she say? He couldn't do it. Instead, he called his voicemail and set it to record a message. They'd be able to find it afterwards. "Mars? It's Rick," he began. "I'm...I'm sorry. I wasn't careful enough. I don't have much time, but there's one more thing I have to do before... "I love you. Tell Sarah I love her, too. Goodbye." Black turned off his phone and leaned back as he rode through another dizzy spell. There was something bothering him, something that was out of place. Something Railrunner had said, something Officer Donnelly had described in his report from the ambulance. If he could only figure it out... Perhaps it was the periodic exhaustion and bouts of pain that connected the random thoughts in his head. Then again, perhaps that was what kept him from realizing things earlier. Detective Black turned to Agent Captain. "So what's a roller coaster known for, Vic? What's it there to do? Two things, two emotions: fear and exhilaration. Happiness. And what I felt off that thing when it went on a rampage was some mighty strong happiness. So what if it was feeding off of fear? What if these things are just a bit empathic, even less than me, just enough to feel fear and turn that into joy? And what if it goes the other way, too? "You read Rob Donnelly's report of the car chase, right? They'd given up completely right at the end, and they were laughing at some stupid joke. The fear was gone and they were laughing when Railrunner screamed and ran! So if fear becomes happiness, then happiness becomes fear!" Agent Captain shook his head. "There's a hell of a lot of supposing going on there, Rick." "And I suppose you've got a better idea?" "Yeah. Snipers and anti-armor rockets. Speaking of..." Captain grabbed the radio receiver. "Dispatch, this is Special Agent Captain. How are those reinforcements coming along?" "Roger, Captain, SWAT regulars are right on your tail and converging on-site. Snipers are a few minutes behind, but the Guard colonel says the imported RPG's won't be ready for another hour." "gently caress!" Agent Captain cursed, smacking the steering wheel. "Minutes behind and they'll need more to set up, and meanwhile the bastard already has a lead and once he finds that portal he's out of our reach. gently caress!" "And with that fancy new sanguikinesis of his, the regulars won't be able to hit him as fast as he can hit us." Black was silent for a moment before continuing: "But there is one thing we could still try." Captain objected, but Black interrupted him. "I've got nothing left to lose, Vic. You know that. And an old con man like me is ten times better at faking emotions than any SWAT guy on the force." The special agent gave Black a long look as he pulled in to the parking lot. The detective's grim expression made it clear that nothing, not fate nor time nor death itself would stop him from ending the monster roller coaster's rampage. All Captain could do was sigh in defeat and nod his acceptance. "Would you mind stopping by that ambulance before we reach the gate?" Black asked, pointing through the window. "I need to borrow a crutch." Mystic Park was utterly silent on what should have been a bustling Sunday evening, the first weekend after its grand seasonal opening. Instead, the park was closed, police tape enhancing the chicken wire fences that blocked off the Park's property from the surrounding farms and campgrounds. Barely blossoming trees shook in the wind, providing the only sound to two hundred acres that should have been full of the shrieking of amusement ride passengers, the babbling of flowing crowds, the sizzling of grills, and the steel rumbling of roller coasters. A small number of police officers and security guards had been left behind to keep the park off-limits to the morbidly curious and uninformed visitors, but all were found dead or dying from massive internal trauma when the first SWAT teams arrived, even those who had run or hid instead of trying to confront the bloodthirsty monster. The reinforcements were still attempting to set up a new cordon when Black and Captain arrived. "So what am I looking for?" the detective asked as a paramedic resized a spare crutch to fit under his arm. "Dimensional portals are always based out of reflective surfaces," Captain explained. "Mirrors, still ponds, glass windows at the right time of day. I believe there is a hall of mirrors in Mystic Park, but none of the panes would be large enough for a roller coaster train to fit through. Most of the water rides probably won't work, either; too choppy." "Hey, isn't there a big reflecting pool up by the Dynamo?" the paramedic, Lenny, offered. "I remember meeting a date there once." "That's right, yeah," Black confirmed. "I passed it on my tour through the place when I was staking it out. Chief Lugo told me it's where they keep the laser light show equipment when it's not in use." "Better hurry over, then, Rick. I'm guessing his confederates have already crossed over, but it seems as though Railrunner has decided to stick around for a bit of 'revenge.' There's no telling when he'll get bored and finally leave." Black checked his pistol's chamber and switched off the safety. "Time for some revenge of our own." The reflecting pool was only a few minutes away from the entrance by foot, even considering Detective Black's occasional limping. The pond was open at one end to the park's main thoroughfare and bordered on the other sides by a two-story restaurant, a ferris wheel, and the main hill of a wooden roller coaster, the Dynamo. Benches were scattered all around the plaza, so Detective Black picked one under a tree for a little shade from the midday sun and waited, his gun in his lap. The wait was not long objectively, although Black had enough time to wonder more than once whether he'd survive long enough for the creature to find him. He didn't sense its arrival, however, until it shouted at him. "YOU?! How are you still alive?!" Black was standing with his gun in his hand in a second, although naturally his ankle took this opportunity to swell and twist painfully. Grabbing his crutch, he hobbled backwards to the edge of the pond, eyes peeled. He didn't have to look very hard. Railrunner's twenty-foot bright-red steel frame was easily visible through the nearby trees and it was only thanks to approaching from behind that Black missed it at all. Rather than responding to the question, the detective raised his firearm and shot. Railrunner screamed in pain and raced over to Black's position, rising up on its rear legs to roar threateningly as long metal spikes extended impossibly from its small plastic wheels. Detective Black laughed. It was kind of funny, really. Who ever heard of a were-roller-coaster before, really? Werewolves at least made some kind of sense; wolves ran in packs, harried their pray to death like humans once did, and were only a bit smaller on average. Haunted amusement parks weren't so novel either, but it was always evil clowns or demons twisting a happy place into a dark reflection. So was Black really supposed to be intimidated by the most elegantly designed, most perfectly engineered, most safely constructed vehicle ever made? Please. The shock on Railrunner's face only made the detective laugh all the harder, and this translated into a growing anxiety. The roller coaster train attempted to dodge past Detective Black and into the pool, but Black brought his gun up to aim at the creature's head even as he laughed. After futilely dodging from one side to the other, Railrunner screeched its metallic cry and spun away. Not to be deterred, Black fired four more rounds and jumped into the train's rearmost car. Sensing what had happened, Railrunner screamed again and attempted to whip Detective Black out of its seats. The rear of the train was not a tail, however, and its centipedial legs were built for traction, leaving Black only mildly discomforted as he swung back and forth. Laughing all the while, he began to climb up Railrunner's body, hopping from one car to the next on all fours, using each faux-leather seat and cushioned restraint as a stepping stone, and occasionally firing a round towards its head to keep it on its toes. Growing desperate, Railrunner charged forward, crashing through the ferris wheel's queue house and directly up onto the side. The pastel blue supports began to groan and bend from the unbalanced weight, and Detective Black nearly dropped his gun as he flopped back and forth against Railrunner's body, hanging onto a restraint handle for dear life. The creature began to twist and curve across the vertical surface of the ferris wheel, changing direction and orientation in an attempt to drop the detective off. For his part, Black holstered his pistol and began to climb, sometimes up, sometimes down, and sometimes across, but always closer to Railrunner's head. This became increasingly difficult as the main support strut began to buckle and the wheel slowly bent towards the reflecting pool below, and Black silently thanked God that his arms had not been injured. At last, Detective Black was no more than two cars away from the monster's head, more than close enough. Railrunner knew as much itself, and it spun its head an inhuman degree to face the detective. Immediately Black felt a pressure building in his chest, the creature's psychokinesis battling with the Hoodoo powder's magic. Spying the amulet dangling from Railrunner's neck, Black cried, "Oh no you don't!" and leaped upwards to grab it. As his fist closed around the charm, the pressure relaxed and Black smiled, glad to know that Park Beyond foci could be negated with mental interference the same way that regular ones were. Too helplessly afraid to defend himself, Railrunner could only ask, "How?" as Black pulled out his pistol. "It's your own fault, really," Detective Black responded. "You should've known you would lose the most dangerous game." He set the weapon against Railrunner's chin and emptied the magazine. The roller coaster train slumped back, still at last. His job complete, Detective Black allowed himself to look back, curious as to how he would get down. Unfortunately, his leg twisted out from under him once again and with both hands full he lost his balance. The necklace cord snapped from around Railrunner's neck and Black fell towards the shallow pool below. Richard Black had always heard that you relive your entire life in your last moments, but he found that it wasn't entirely true. All he could think of were regrets. I wonder what it would have been like if I'd asked Sandy out instead? I wish I hadn't been so obvious in the department store. I wish I'd been there when Dad died. I wish I'd lived to see Sarah's prom night. I forgot to take out the trash today. I hope Mars remembers. I suppose she'll be fine without me. She was always great at remembering those little details I keep forgetting. He closed his eyes as his noontime reflection came up to meet him. Detective Richard Black will return
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# ? May 21, 2013 00:03 |
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Bobbin Threadbare posted:Detective Richard Black will return Please be true Bobbin, you might be sick of hearing this over and over again, but I love this story of yours. I never thought that Twisted! could inspire such a thing. What you've written is a thing of beauty and it is leagues better than what Joseph Wong is going through. Even if it is just a polished turd, it has been polished to the point where one can be fooled into that it isn't a turd at all.
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# ? May 21, 2013 00:47 |
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Detective Black
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# ? May 21, 2013 00:54 |
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Oh no Detective Black And I assume the storyline is now split from Miranda's since Railrunner is subdued/dead, right? As for the story proper: Joseph, I think the reason why "A place from the most imaginative mind" is so utterly boring is that the said "mind" is that of Miranda Leek.
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# ? May 21, 2013 03:07 |
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Chapter 33 – Capturequote:
What the hell is a “scream machine”? quote:
Everyone thought differently about you because you are a psychopathic, sadistic mass murderer. quote:
Odds on Clare becoming Shadowtrack – Rising. quote:
“Personal” thinking? As opposed to what? quote:
Asking Railrunner to not do anything stupid? Might as well ask the rain to fall upwards or the Sun to revolve around the Earth. quote:
What happened to the magical racist guard spiders? quote:
Man, these roller-coasters are pathetic cry-babies if being captured and scratched in a few places is enough to send them into tears. quote:
Exactly what was “crude” about Railrunner’s reply? quote:
Oh great, now they have vampire amusement park rides. quote:
Ships do not “swim”! Oh wait, this is another amusement park ride “ship”, so maybe it does swim. My apologies to Miranda Leek. quote:
For a supposedly hardened veteran of the roller-coaster wars, Thunderbark sure is a pathetic coward. quote:
Wasn’t he “desperately crying for help” literally just a second ago? quote:
What hints?
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# ? May 21, 2013 13:58 |
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JosephWongKS posted:What the hell is a scream machine? http://railrunnermiranda.deviantart.com/art/Scream-Machine-304571927 quote:What happened to the magical racist guard spiders? Thunderbark obviously went out hunting and so he was not in range of the spider's protective radius, duh. quote:“Hello Bones, would you like to meet Thunderbark and - Ra–lrunner [sic]?” she hissed. Holy crap was that actually in the book itself? The printed version? How do you miss that?! quote:What hints? quote:“Lets [sic] use him as bait for the red herring!” she laughed. “I’ll deal with him later. Now move!” She finished as the ship swam off. There is one thing to to be subtle about it, but Miranda manages to be in a league of her own. She has no faith in the reader to puzzle things out for themselves, so she whacks them over with a 2-by-4 because she can't risk her precious book being complicated to any degree for her readers.
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# ? May 21, 2013 14:13 |
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Iced Cocoa posted:
But that's not even a "hint". It's something Freakshow already said out loud, within Railrunner's hearing. That goes well beyond whacking your reader with a 2-by-4.
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# ? May 21, 2013 14:59 |
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Bobbin, I don't know what to say... You had before you a book that brings the word "bad" to a whole new level. A monstrous, twisted mass of bland plotlines, flat characters, awful grammar and spelling, wish-fulfillment fantasies, and many, many other hallmarks of terrible writing - glued together by the unimaginative mind of a teenage furry. You hacked it apart, untwisted the loops and coils, and weaved them into something new and interesting. Your "fanfic" genuinely surprised me, got me attached to the characters, made me want to read more and eagerly await new chapters. One day, I'd love to get a chance to read a book you wrote. Thank you for making an internet stranger's day more enjoyable.
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# ? May 21, 2013 15:32 |
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Chapter 34 - Definitionquote:
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# ? May 21, 2013 16:10 |
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Ahahah! I was wondering where that chapter was. Hey Bobbin, I'm tempted to put your story, first part, into a kindle format for me to just keep and read whenever. I don't know how to put it in epub and I use kindle so it's pretty much for me. Would you mind if I did this? And perhaps upload it elsewhere for others to download and possibly convert?
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# ? May 21, 2013 16:16 |
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So Shadowtrack is pretty much guaranteed to be Clare. Woohoo domestic abuse cycle continues Thunderbark is gonna die in Railrunner's arms. Railrunner will be on the verge of defeat at Ironwheel's hand before some magical macguffin deus ex machinas him a victory. This story is so cliche it's incredible. Once you get past the roller coaster Mary Sues with horrible characterization, it's an incredibly flat book that is composed entirely out of worn-out cliches. THERE I NOTHING ORIGINAL HERE. It's amazing. Even the worst writers have some small flare of originality, stopped clock is right twice a day and all that, but Miranda doesn't even have that. And now our characters aren't only psychopaths, they are whiny psychopaths. Because this book needed to be worse.
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# ? May 21, 2013 18:34 |
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I'm bummed out that Detective Black mught be dead, but that was a really great story. Thanks for sharing it, Bobbin.quote:everyone thought differently about me because of what I was – quote:a roller coaster. quote:“First off, I have a name, it is Railrunner. Get that through your dismembered skull. Second, Thunderbark is not a trophy!” I growled. quote:“Hello Bones, would you like to meet Thunderbark and - Ra–lrunner [sic]?” she hissed. quote:She arched her back and snarled, then threw a fireball at me. It missed by only a few inches. quote:“Lets [sic] use him as bait for the red herring!” she laughed. “I’ll deal with him later. Now move!” She finished as the ship swam off. quote:
"Hey, Obi-Sigh Kenobi," Freakshow said, "you do realise the only thing around that might help you is Big Red down there?" Thunderbark thought about that, and then yelled louder. "Railrunner! I'm fine! Don't save me!" quote:My life: sucks
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# ? May 21, 2013 22:38 |
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Wait was that the actual chapter?
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# ? May 21, 2013 23:39 |
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alcharagia posted:Wait was that the actual chapter? Yes. That's it. That's the whole of Chapter 34.
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# ? May 21, 2013 23:51 |
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Iced Cocoa posted:Hey Bobbin, I'm tempted to put your story, first part, into a kindle format for me to just keep and read whenever. I don't know how to put it in epub and I use kindle so it's pretty much for me. Would you mind if I did this? And perhaps upload it elsewhere for others to download and possibly convert? Feel free. There are a few ways online to convert from text to pdf or text to epub, so you can put it in whatever format you please. There are a few things I wouldn't mind revising about the story, but it's against my policy to put in that sort of effort into the things I do for free on the internet, so I'm just going to leave it as-is. If you want to collect and share it, go right ahead (but it'd be nice if you credited me, too).
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# ? May 22, 2013 00:27 |
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I actually handcode the .opf and .ncx files, though I don't know all the shortcuts and tags to put in there. Has serviced me well before though. I'll have your username listed as the Author both in tags and on the title page, and the title page will also includes a link to the thread and, if you want, link to your SA profile. Too bad I totally lack a cover page. Looks like the site can convert .mobi files to .epub, but I have encountered a glitch already with that and gotta have to fix that. It also comes up with converting to PDF. Thanks for the link, they really help.
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# ? May 22, 2013 00:57 |
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JosephWongKS posted:Yes. That's it. That's the whole of Chapter 34. What, but That's a Twitter post, not a chapter of a book
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# ? May 22, 2013 01:55 |
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At least "several rides keeping him restrained" was somewhat clever.
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# ? May 22, 2013 03:42 |
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alcharagia posted:What, but John Dies at the End has a chapter that's similarly short--21 words or so--and it's one of the most effective chapters in the book, purely for the sense of dread it builds. Notably, it contains no complaints on the part of the protagonist about how much it sucks to be an immortal roller coaster that has made a multitude of very bad decisions.
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# ? May 22, 2013 05:13 |
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TombsGrave posted:John Dies at the End has a chapter that's similarly short--21 words or so--and it's one of the most effective chapters in the book, purely for the sense of dread it builds. The capability of less words to do much more isn't lost on me. Some of my favorite parts in House of Leaves are the bits where the text gets really minimal per page. (I haven't read John Dies at the End, though: any good?) These words don't do anything. They really just don't convey anything but the complete and utter tragedy Rodney lives, the sheer sorrow of The Murder King. Eight words to catch up on Rodney Phillips's Twitter. Absolutely fantastic. Edit: Seriously, how long has it taken him to answer to Railrunner? That's just off. Even if someone ran up to me with absolutely irrefutable proof that I was actually a non-euclidean alien named Floopgort I wouldn't stop answering to my name. Didn't he have parents? Thunderbark dropped him off with human parents, right, that's how he got to be named Rodney. Does that mean nothing to him? Are they just a null factor, does everything he's ever been as a human just not mean anything, why would you give up everything you've ever done to go pal around with an old coot with abnormally heavy breathing and his stupid sidekicks who never do anything? What is your problem, Rodney?! Edit 2: , alcharagia sighed. Kinu Nishimura fucked around with this message at 05:58 on May 22, 2013 |
# ? May 22, 2013 05:52 |
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JosephWongKS posted:Asking Railrunner to not do anything stupid? Might as well ask the rain to descend upwards or the Sun to revolve around the Earth. Fixed. It doesn't sound so far-fetched, really.
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# ? May 22, 2013 06:28 |
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Chapter 35 – Aggravationquote:
Seems like Miranda Leek gave quote:
And now for Merrylegs as a first-person narrator. As though this book weren’t already confusing enough. quote:
How Thunderbark handles it is to cry like a little baby, apparently. quote:
Miranda Leek apparently didn’t pay attention during her chemistry classes either. “Molecules” are by definition stable – it’s atoms that are “unstable”. I guess Miranda Leek could also be referring to [url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unstable_molecules]the technology[/url] invented by Reed Richards aka Mister Fantastic, but that doesn’t make sense either. quote:
How utterly awful must Railrunner be that his companion legitimately fears being killed and/or eaten by him? quote:
Threatening people weaker than he is and acting like an rear end in a top hat to his companions – this scene sums up Railrunner’s character so well. quote:
One of the biggest under-statements of this book. quote:
That’s not a typo on my part – Railrunner really did say “Clare” in the book. I’m not sure whether him saying “Clare” is a typo on Miranda Leek’s part or was deliberately included to illustrate the state of Railrunner’s psychosis. quote:
53rd sigh of the book. quote:
“I didn’t really mean to beat you, it’s just that I can’t help myself,” said the domestic abuser to his battered spouse. quote:
Do any myths or legends of unicorns (let alone “unicorn carousel horses”) mention them having mind-reading powers? quote:
Remember the scene Chapter 30 where Merrylegs had been bitten by an amusement park plane and Merrylegs was all “Do it! Lick the poo poo off and wrap it please!” and Railrunner was all “My forked tongue ran over her wound, I hated to taste her blood, blood of the good. I liked the blood of the enemy” ? With this scene about “body trembled” and “labored breathing”, the sexual overtones between Merrylegs and Railrunner have just been kicked up a notch. And then you consider that Merrylegs is afraid that Railrunner will kill her and Railrunner keeps “trembling in anger” and giving her “threatening grimaces”, and there’s a strong domestic abuse subtext on top of that as well. This book has seriously messed up inter-personal relationships. quote:
All the horrible memories are those which Railrunner has inflicted on the innocent people he has butchered indiscriminately. quote:
“Special” as in “special”. quote:
That “event” was Railrunner throwing a violent tantrum and posing direct physical threat to his own companions! How can something like that be glossed past? quote:
How is that “nonsense”? Isn’t Thunderbark’s predicament what they are here to discuss? quote:
Reminds me of a battered spouse leaping to the defence of her poor maligned abusive husband. quote:
54th sigh of the book. Also, continued obsession with swearing. quote:
It frightens me that Miranda Leek clearly thinks that Railrunner is in the right here. quote:
Apart from hanging out with Thunderbark, Railrunner and Merrylegs, how is Static acting “stupid”? What the hell is wrong with everyone in this story? quote:
I thought it wouldn’t be possible to make Railrunner a more contemptible character, but somehow Miranda Leek keeps pushing the envelope on that front. quote:
Static was the one who started this? quote:
55th sigh of the book. quote:
With such insincerity in his apology, Railrunner could be a politician. quote:
56th sigh of the book. quote:
Why are they still going to populated areas? Ironwheel can’t be much of a tyrant if the most wanted criminals in the land can blithely stroll into a crowded city.
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# ? May 22, 2013 08:31 |
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There is so much domestic violence subtext in all this that I'm afraid for Miranda. Him being someone in severe need for anger management becomes a plot point for Vertigo:quote:My oc Railrunner, for those who know that coaster well, know that he has an unstable temper - an unpredictable one at that. His temperment is a result of his dark past that troubles him greatly. Railrunner is stubborn and willful, but can be gentle and fun loving despite his appearance and threatening displays. quote:In Vertigo, Railrunner has a problem with his uncontrollable temper - in which his outburst are so violent that his will seems to not be in control and unexplainable happenings occur. He sits down with Mistymetal to explain what's been happening to him. Mistymetal is incredibly gentle with the red coaster. She thinks of him as if he's her son. quote:Railrunner and Shadowtrack have been in love even before they were both transformed into twisted roller coasters (living roller coasters that reside in Amusement Park Between and you will find out how they changed in my book Twisted) In the sequel Vertigo, Railrunner begins to have...problems, horrendous displays through his unpredictable temper. Railrunner's temper is not ordinary like any other coasters. No, it is some sort of powerful force linked to him being a red. (you will find out what this is called once vertigo is released) His "power" is so severe that if angered to the breaking point, he could destroy both himself and Amusement Park Between. This has made Shadowtrack even more close to him despite the danger that she could endure. Her love seems to be the only thing that soothes him after any episode. And it looks like compiling all the text from the ~*~Fanfic~*~ cracked my brain. I had my first Twisted! dream. I dreamt that I was visiting HorriblePencilist, and he had every published work of Miranda. All about Twisted! Some old comic/novel combo (where Railrunner befriends african-american bumper car and there are horrible racist undertones), and the first manuscript of Vertigo. I think there were 4-6 hardcovers in that collection of his, all first editions. Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 10:06 on May 22, 2013 |
# ? May 22, 2013 09:35 |
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I hate you, Rodney. I also hate his stupid name. I've made it a point to never refer to him by his stupid name. drat it you psychopath you spent thirty-odd years calling yourself Rodney you don't just switch over. Why am I so bothered by this
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# ? May 22, 2013 09:43 |
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this is so bad
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# ? May 22, 2013 10:08 |
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quote:“YEAH, YOU BOTH HEARD ME! THOSE ASSHOLES TOOK HIM! HOW IN THE HELL DID SHE CATCH HIM! NONE OF THIS poo poo MAKES SENSE!” I said cutting a tree in half with one swipe. quote:“Ironwheel’s castle is at least a hundred and fifty miles away. Up in the Dread Mountains, the most barren place in all Amusement Park Between.” alcharagia posted:I hate you, Rodney. Twisted rollercoaster names: Railrunner, Thunderbark, Firetrack, Shadowtrack, Angeltrack, Ironwheel, Mistymetal, Moonblood, Redrail, Freakshow, Prototype. Actual rollercoaster names: The Cyclone, Leap-the-Dips, The Racer, Kingda Ka, Steel Dragon 2000, Top Thrill Dragster, Millennium Force, Saw: The Ride, Nemesis, Oblivion. About the only thing I could see an amusement park actually naming a ride is Freakshow, although they would then get violently petitioned for disrespecting people with deformities or disabilities.
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# ? May 22, 2013 10:19 |
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Iced Cocoa posted:Note: Mistymetal is a character in Vertigo that does not appear in Twisted. My speculation is that she's the mother of Firetrack, the second red, there are couple of clues strewn around that hint at that. By "hints" you mean she outright states it several times over the course of one chapter, right?
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# ? May 22, 2013 10:56 |
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Radio! posted:By "hints" you mean she outright states it several times over the course of one chapter, right? Surprisingly enough, no. She hasn't published Vertigo yet, though a lot of her hold pieces have plot bits here and there. When we're at the last chapters I might end up compiling all those plot snippets to summarize Vertigo for the thread. How I got to the conclusion is that Firetrack was raised in some specific place with his mother. He lived for most of his life there. Mistymetal has been at that location for ages, in some cave where she guards rides that were believed to be dead. (Please God don't have Angeltrack there ). Mistymetal also guards the secret on how Darkrail, the baddie of Vertigo, can be killed. Who was the one who killed Firetrack. And Mistymetal knows something about Railrunner's anger issues, and looks at Railrunner as his own son. Given how utterly simplistic and cliche Miranda's writing is, I don't really have any doubts that she is the mother of Firetrack.
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# ? May 22, 2013 11:15 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 12:38 |
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Between her fixation on mild swearing and the pages missing from the "sex" portion of relationships, I get this feeling that Miranda may have been raised in a strongly conservative religious environment. It's not a terribly uncommon upbringing here in the United States, particularly not in a Southern state like Tennessee.
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# ? May 22, 2013 14:57 |