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reignonyourparade
Nov 15, 2012
I know D has no chance but D because J is still just gonna result in us getting grabbed.

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I ride bikes all day
Sep 10, 2007

I shitposted in the same thread for 2 years and all I got was this red text av. Ask me about my autism!



College Slice
A

It's time to skip this crazy popsicle stand. Beatings, ostracism, and now cannibalism? Peace, we're out.

Kira Akashiya
Feb 2, 2013
D

alpaca diseases
May 19, 2009

Trundel posted:

Except for the fact that they came here to trade, not to murder everyone within sight at a moments notice.

I think trading went out the window as soon as they heard from Jalitha that they had stumbled into a literal village of monsters from over the hill, as according to their religions stories. They might not attack us, but they'll definitely be considering a stabbing related way out of this mess they've found themselves in.

alpaca diseases fucked around with this message at 01:15 on May 28, 2013

SerSpook
Feb 13, 2012




Diog, do we have any tortoise gods in our pantheon?

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger

SerSpook posted:

Diog, do we have any tortoise gods in our pantheon?

I don't think we have a specific form for Ninevah or Yamsef and I am privately pretending one of them is a sea turtle, because I really like sea turtles. I hope this whole thing does not end up with us having the ocean as an enemy.

Dammerung
Oct 17, 2008

"Dang, that's hot."


A: Let's go to Baitel!

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

All at once, the empty handed man yells something and reaches out to grab you, Jalitha screams "OG! They are going to save us, come!" and your father draws his giant shark tooth necklace and cuts his hand, the wind begins to blow...

You step between the two groups.

Which are not out of grabbing reach. As the empty handed man just handed your father a jug of something and moments ago and just before that, your father slapped his hand away when he offered to shake it.

Indeed, the man took one step and tried to grab for you, because you are not out of grabbing reach, quite the opposite, in fact!





You yell out in your native tongue "Wait! Calm do-" as the empty handed man grabs you, as he is very much within grabbing distance and pulls you behind him. Jalitha hugs you "Og! El has answered our prayers... don't look!" All of the strangers are yelling and you can't understand them, though several of them have just shouted the word "KING!" the rest is lost in the clammer and the name "El" is said a number of times.







It is noon, but as quickly as you could blink, the sky has turned black and it is now dark. Bolts of lightning are crashing into the trees around you.







Your fathers eyes are glowing bright red. Your father raises his hands and and shoots lightning out of them at the empty handed man and at two of the men next to him. The two men beside the empty handed man go down and the rest of the outsiders scream, the empty handed man cries out in pain but does not fall down. Some of the other outsides stab their spears at Mopo and Kikar who go down bloody and screaming, their screaming ceases after another quick stab and a jerk from their spears. Selk and your uncle Pagam run for their lives. One of the men stabs your father in the chest, no blood spurts out and it does not seem to slow him down, nor do the next two spears to pierce his chest have any obvious effect. Your father launches two more bolts of lightning into the chest of the empty handed man whose strange shiny clothing has been burned through to his chest, the man cries out in pain and draws a very large and shiny knife from his side, one you would not recognize as such but is in fact, a sword. With one quick motion he lops off your father's head.

The clouds instantly part and it is once again noon.







Jalitha screams something. The earth shakes once. Then again. The sword wielding man turns to the others and says something to the other outsides, they lift the two fallen outsiders who groan slightly and place them on the backs of the furry monsters. The woman who was beside the furry monsters runs forward and grabs the basket of pearls Jalitha dropped and scoops up those which have fallen out as the fighting occurred. Jalitha who is now crying looks to you and says "My son! I am so sorry! We need to go now before the demon takes it's vengeance! We have been saved by the king of Zepath but we have to go now!"

OPTION A: Go with Jalitha and the outsiders as they flee
OPTION B: Run for the village!
OPTION C: Run deeper into the forest!
OPTION D: Run to the beach!
OPTION E: Grab your fathers giant shark took and avenge him! Stab the man who killed him!
OPTION F: Cry! This option can be included with any other!
OPTION G: Something else! (Specify)
OPTION H: Grab your father's giant shark tooth and THEN go with Jalitha and the outsiders as they flee!

Diogines fucked around with this message at 01:50 on May 28, 2013

Canuck-Errant
Oct 28, 2003

MOOD: BURNING - MUSIC: DISCO INFERNO BY THE TRAMMPS
Grimey Drawer
- we should probably grab that shark tooth. Maybe wrap it up in something. But yeah, fleeing seems like a good idea right now.

Canuck-Errant fucked around with this message at 02:11 on May 28, 2013

XOXO
Mar 8, 2013

Ask me about being weaker than a 60 year-old British woman.


VENGEANCE!

edit: every last one of you going with our father's killers is a traitor to the fishgod.

SerSpook
Feb 13, 2012




H and

Seems like the best option based on the poo poo that happened. I envision us basically refusing to cut our hair or surrender the tooth, in honor of our father, even while we refuse to necessarily travel down the same path he did (unless it yields the most power). These times, respect for the father is important and I think we can get away with this. Maybe even get some respect from it.

edit: changing vote.

SerSpook fucked around with this message at 03:53 on May 28, 2013

Soylent Pudding
Jun 22, 2007

We've got people!


Canuck-Errant posted:

and - we should probably grab that shark tooth. Maybe wrap it up in something. But yeah, fleeing seems like a good idea right now.

This

Soylent Pudding fucked around with this message at 02:02 on May 28, 2013

Althair
Jul 26, 2006
words are weapons
A This is very traumatic. Our father revealed terrible magic, wounds that did not bleed, and was gruesomely beheaded. Jalitha has been the greatest source of love and comfort in our short life, and she says we are being rescued. Our father was very harsh, but we thought that was simply his way. It seems that there are many things -wrong- about our village, secrets and mysteries around the eating of flesh, our parentage, and the power of the Great Fish. Our father was powerful, but he was not saved. Perhaps the Sky Giants are stronger?

In our state of shock I think we should cling to Jalitha.

Successful Businessmanga
Mar 28, 2010

quote:

"My son! I am so sorry! We need to go now before the demon takes it's vengeance!

Dad is on his way back for VENGEANCE!!! Stab that armor hole and pray to Asherah to the Gods to smith this heathen!

Successful Businessmanga fucked around with this message at 01:57 on May 28, 2013

Raserys
Aug 22, 2011

IT'S YA BOY
and

White Noise Marine
Apr 14, 2010

Canuck-Errant posted:

and - we should probably grab that shark tooth. Maybe wrap it up in something. But yeah, fleeing seems like a good idea right now.

I also vote this

DCBomB
Sep 14, 2008



Peace!







I like too, I guess

DCBomB fucked around with this message at 01:57 on May 28, 2013

reignonyourparade
Nov 15, 2012
B! But try to grab the shark tooth, hopefully we can learn priesting in another village.

reignonyourparade fucked around with this message at 02:41 on May 28, 2013

Greaseman
Aug 12, 2007
Going with E+F.

alpaca diseases
May 19, 2009



Take a swing at this Demon-King hand with the tooth to get him to back the gently caress off, if he reaches for us. Hopefully cut him so he knows hes marked for vengeance, then;

Run back to the beach with the tooth

Asherah will provide us another teacher, then we will avenge our father!, vote VENGEANCE!!

(Come on guys, why are we turning down the opportunity to eventually have Asherah fueled demon powers?)

e: changed to running to the beach, and added swinging at the king if he tries to grab us

alpaca diseases fucked around with this message at 02:53 on May 28, 2013

Raserys
Aug 22, 2011

IT'S YA BOY
People who are quoting Canuck-Errant, please edit the quote to an H to match the edited post

Xun
Apr 25, 2010

!

PandaPropaganda
Apr 22, 2008
lets do this poo poo.

Kira Akashiya
Feb 2, 2013
H!

Snow Job
May 24, 2006



If we abandon the village and Asherah, the tooth is not ours to take. But we should go, see another part of the world.

FoxTerrier
Feb 15, 2012

Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

maxhush posted:

Grab the tooth, run back to the village!!

Asherah will provide us another teacher, then we will avenge our father!, vote VENGANCE!!

(Come on guys, why are we turning down the opportunity to eventually have Asherah fueled demon powers?)

Seconded! But run to the beach instead of the village. The fish god will show us the way; then we can lay waste to the heathen jerkfaces in style. :yarr:

(Edited post to include button icon and change running location to the beach)

FoxTerrier fucked around with this message at 02:12 on May 28, 2013

Sucrose
Dec 9, 2009
Welp, Shushem is dead. We know the stories of our people, but can't perform any rituals beyond grinding some powders.

Our people may commit ritual cannibalism, or may not. The other villages will send another priest, probably. Priests of Asherah have real power. Jalitha is almost certainly our actual mother.

You know what, I think we should go with her. A Our father was an abusive rear end in a top hat who terrorized the whole village, and people have been lying to us our entire lives. I say we go with the only family we have left.

SerSpook
Feb 13, 2012




Editing my vote to include .

ConfusedPig
Mar 27, 2013


Um guys, may I suggest that there is a possibility that the the tooth might be trapped/cursed/act as a GPS tracking device for a very pissed of Asherah? Option H seems way too much 'superior' to option A.

I vote , Trying to attack dudes with actual frickin' metal swords without any actual priest powers is suicidal, it didn't help Shushem who had genuinely impressive gently caress-you-with-lightning spells. And there's nothing left for us here, we would be even more of an outcast then before, and it seems Jalitha really is our mother.

ConfusedPig fucked around with this message at 02:12 on May 28, 2013

Kristopher
Jun 28, 2006
E. We just decided to start being more serious about this Asherah thing, and we just saw a man strike down a priest of Asherah. Vengeance is the only reasonable course of action.

DCBomB
Sep 14, 2008

GoneWithTheTornado posted:

Um guys, may I suggest that there is a possibility that the the tooth might be trapped/cursed/act as a GPS tracking device for a very pissed of Asherah? Option H seems way too much 'superior' to option A

Don't matter, it's got mojo we want mojo.

Cat Wings
Oct 12, 2012

G. Grab the tooth and run for the beach! Asherah will keep us safe!

OrangeOrbit
Apr 27, 2008
Fun Shoe
Let's go with H and F.

Random Idiot
Mar 15, 2001
Reminds me a lot of the opening to Conan the Barbarian including having a parent beheaded in front of him. Clearly the path to the most awesome story is to swear vengeance here and now.

E

Also you people voting to leave have no sense of community, even if it is a cannibalistic force-lightning community.

Globofglob
Jan 14, 2008
E

Genpei Turtle
Jul 20, 2007

Jewcoon posted:

G. Grab the tooth and run for the beach! Asherah will keep us safe!

I like this, it's got my vote. I get the feeling we'll see something cool if we run to the beach, like Asherah himself coming out of the water to avenge Shushem.

reignonyourparade
Nov 15, 2012

Random Idiot posted:

even if it is a cannibalistic force-lightning community.

Man people need to shut up about the cannibalism, if there IS cannibalism its just RITUAL cannibalism, that's barely cannibalism at all!

Canuck-Errant
Oct 28, 2003

MOOD: BURNING - MUSIC: DISCO INFERNO BY THE TRAMMPS
Grimey Drawer

GoneWithTheTornado posted:

Um guys, may I suggest that there is a possibility that the the tooth might be trapped/cursed/act as a GPS tracking device for a very pissed of Asherah? Option H seems way too much 'superior' to option A

You're free to vote if you want, but I'm still solidly for it.

Trundel
Mar 13, 2005

:10bux: + :awesomelon: = :roboluv:
- a sound investment!
Ah poo poo, I was wrong!

Alright time to re-prioritize, I'm voting for with a side of to grab the shark tooth first. Once we're in the ocean we'll be safe from this monstrous King man.

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Rahul
Dec 10, 2004

Before I vote, can we ask Jalitha any questions?
I'd like to say
"Whats going on? What do you mean they're rescuing us? Why were you talking about cannibals?"

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