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Daned
Jan 14, 2008

A,C,A

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rex monday
Jul 9, 2001

Pisk. Pisk. Piiiiiiisk!
F, B, E

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009



ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

Theglavwen posted:

E B F

We're sensitive to the ridicule, mistrust, suspicion and general anti-us sentiment from others. We're starting to pick up on the idea that this kid thinks we're a barbarian, an uncivilized, if strong, lout, and now a beast of burden. This isn't the way we want our new and only friendship to go. Want to avoid a sort of Pocahontas thing here, we don't want to be 'on show' when we get to the city as the king's new novelty, the amazing beast boy. So E.

Yeah, we can play games, why not, helps us explore too, there's nothing terribly irresponsible about it if we stick close and play responsibly. Perhaps wandering out further would help us be found by Pagam or something, but we've had no indication that we're being looked for, danger outweighs the possible benefit of wandering off into a potentially dangerous and unknown wilderness. So B.

As for the others, we've already chatted with the King, Danal's with us all the time anyway, same with Jalitha. I figure we probably want to prove ourselves, stand out somewhat from the little kids, and who better to look to than the cool younger adult for inspiration on how to be a young man? So F. He can probably give us some perspective on the place of young adults in the culture too.

Good reasoning here! E B F

LLSix
Jan 20, 2010

The real power behind countless overlords

Games that make you swole are the best games.

This was and is a terrible idea, but it worked out last time so I don't see any reason why Enkidul wouldn't keep doing it until something convinced him it isn't smart. Besides, the king should approve, he's taking his kid on a boyscouts trip anyways, this is like extra credit.

An old person? Almost as strange and wondrous as the Labaran's monsters.

Ixtlilton
Mar 10, 2012

How to Draw
by Rube Goldberg

I trust theglavwen's reasoning, EBF.

jng2058
Jul 17, 2010

We have the tools, we have the talent!





EBF

John_A_Tallon
Nov 22, 2000

Oh my! Check out that mitre!
Voting D,A,G because playing anything is still very novel for Enkidel, and the old greybeard may know a thing or two about helping people learn to speak his language.

tarepanda
Mar 26, 2011

Living the Dream
If we go on a "hunting" trip with Danal, why don't we talk to the King first and see if he has any tips or things that we should look for, like cool animals or something?

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

ETA less than two hours.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

You are walking through the forest, as you have been for a few hours. Danal grabs a stick from the ground, points to himself and declares to you with a large smile "Labaras!" then lifts his arms in the air above his head.

You place him upon you shoulders and make a roaring monster noise, Danal says something but it is incomprehensible but you laugh, enjoying your time with Danal and enjoying the games the two of you play as you walk. Danal continues to stab at invisible monsters and villains atop his trusty mount, you, who plays along. At times you play simple games where he speaks a word and points to something, trying to teach you new words. Danal continues to ask you to help him gather plants and odd flowers, which you do, putting each into a pot one of the donkeys carries. You appear to be enjoying every minute spent with your first and only friend.

No one has threatened so far to beat you today, a marked improvement over many of the days of your life so far, where the threat was frequent.

After a time, you find yourself walking beside Ishamal with your mother. He is the oldest man in the group, with graying hair and a balding head, you are not aware of it, but the man is 60. There were very few elderly in your village, this may be the oldest man you have ever met. Like all of the other outsiders he is very, very tall, slightly over 7 feet, but less tall than the gargantuan king who is slightly over seven and a half feet. Ishamal seems seriously minded, but he is available for you to tall to or question, if you are so inclined.

Ask any questions you want. As with previous posts, statements or potentially controversial questions will need a mini vote.

I am aiming for the next update tomorrow in the early afternoon or late morning, questions will be answered between then and now.

FoxTerrier
Feb 15, 2012

Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

Best to start with the basics. I'd like to: Ask him what his name means and how he knows the King and Danal. And oh, ask him if he has ever slain any monsters.

EDIT: Re-phrased my name question slightly

OhYo
Apr 14, 2006

"What wisdom can you share?"

tarepanda
Mar 26, 2011

Living the Dream

Diogines posted:

Ask any questions you want. As with previous posts, statements or potentially controversial questions will need a mini vote.

I am aiming for the next update tomorrow in the early afternoon or late morning, questions will be answered between then and now.

How old are you?

Where were you born?

What do you do? Is it fun?

How long have you known the King?

Is there an ocean near here?

What happened to your hair?

What's your favorite Labaras story?

Do you like dogs? (If yes, then...) Do you have any? (If yes, then...) How many dogs do you have?

What do dogs do? Can I ride one?

What do dogs eat?

What do donkeys eat?

Can I help you?

Do you like me?

What's your favorite food?

Can you cook?

Will I be as tall as you?

Squeeze my hand as hard as you can!

Do you know any games?

Can I ride you?

Did your dad hit you? Does the King hit you? Will you hit me?

Can you help Jalitha walk better?

(Inspired by questions kids 8-12 loved to ask me when I worked at elementary schools...)

Edit: vv Thanks, now I feel bad. vv

tarepanda fucked around with this message at 02:24 on Jun 11, 2013

FoxTerrier
Feb 15, 2012

Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

Not to bombard you, but thought of two others I'd like to ask to try and get a handle of the society we're walking into:

1. Does the king have many friends and helpers?

2. Does the king have a wife? What does she do all day? Is she nice?

Hope this isn't too much at once, thanks!! :ohdear:

alpaca diseases
May 19, 2009

Why are you so old?

Have you seen any other villages like mine?

Are there any people like me in the city?

What did my dad do to the king?

I know the last ones a bit controversial, the whole them finding out who our Dad was. But it's going to get found out sooner or later and who best to let it slip to than what looks like the (hopefully) wise old advisor to the king, who would probably have the most level-headed reaction out of everyone?

HBar
Sep 13, 2007

What's the city like?

What do they have to eat there?

Are there other friendly beasts like the donkeys?

Do you know any magic?

Why did the king come to my village?

Have you been to a lot of places?

Why is everyone dressed weird?

E:
What was it like when you were young?

How do you know which way to go in the woods?

Do you have any children?

HBar fucked around with this message at 03:04 on Jun 11, 2013

Deadly Ham Sandwich
Aug 19, 2009
Smellrose
I forgot to five this thread. Just fived it.

Questions for grandpa:

1. Are you older than than the king? (I don't know how we can judge the age of a superhuman king by just looking at him, and we can't count high enough to understand his age.)

2. Am I asking too many questions?

3. Are there whales in the water near your village?

4. Are you a good swimmer? (This question is more so we can gloat a little. Barbarians know some things!)

Deadly Ham Sandwich fucked around with this message at 02:46 on Jun 11, 2013

Hot Yellow KoolAid
Aug 17, 2012
What was Tudiya like when he was younger?

Trundel
Mar 13, 2005

:10bux: + :awesomelon: = :roboluv:
- a sound investment!
'Is Tudiya King because he's the tallest?'

'If not because he's tall, how did Tudiya become King?'

'Will Danal become King if he grows to be tall/whatever it is that made Tudiya King?'

'I like fish, are there any fish where we are going?'

tarepanda
Mar 26, 2011

Living the Dream

Trundel posted:

'Is Tudiya King because he's the tallest?'

'If not because he's tall, how did Tudiya become King?'

'Will Danal become King if he grows to be tall/whatever it is that made Tudiya King?'

'I like fish, are there any fish where we are going?'

Congratulations, you win Panda's Sounds Like A Kid Award.

Edit: Did Mibbit just poo poo itself for anyone else?

GloriousDemon
May 1, 2009
If we can't ask the Tudiya how old he is I don't think we can ask Ishamal, we should ask:
Why is your hair so grey and your skin so wrinkly?

Mr. Ishamal do you have any stories of Leviathan and the other fourth day creatures the angels slew, were any of them sea monsters?

Angela Christine posted:

He is a healthy old man. Our village had healthy old people.

Diogines posted:

"They ate the old..." -mom

You have no frame of reference to know how old people are supposed to get, nor could you count to sixty, but you have never seen a person older than their late 50s in the village.
He's the most grizzled person we've seen and we're gonna ask him whimsical childish questions gosh darnit! :colbert:

edit: We all forgot the most important question of all... What's your favorite color?

GloriousDemon fucked around with this message at 10:01 on Jun 11, 2013

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

Can you teach me how to be an adventurer like the guy I'm named after?

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

wiggle wiggle




GloriousDemon posted:

If we can't ask the Tudiya how old he is I don't think we can ask Ishamal, we should ask:
Why is your hair so grey and your skin so wrinkly?


He is a healthy old man. Our village had healthy old people. What we didn't have was feeble old people. Or sick people. Or disfigured people. In our village if you were sick you either recovered fully quickly, or you died.

Everyone in the party was healthy enough to go for a fun trek through the wilderness. We won't see anything Og would regard as a freakshow until we reach civilization.

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger
Ask him what sorts of questions he asks.

DCBomB
Sep 14, 2008

Are we there yet?

RandomPauI
Nov 24, 2006


Grimey Drawer
Are there such things as good demons?

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

As you continue to walk through the forest, the palm trees become more and more infrequent and other, more leafy and sturdy trees, more numerous.

You are walking besides Ishamal, the eldest member of your band, but still a man of huge proportions, your mother helps to interpret.

quote:

Ask him what his name means and how he knows the King and Danal. And oh, ask him if he has ever slain any monsters.


"Sweetling, he says that he is named for a Sky Giant and that he has known the king his entire life. He says that he slew many monsters with the King's father."


quote:

"What wisdom can you share?"
The man says something, your mother blinks. "Um. He says to never turn down a chance to eat, to drink or to get a good nights sleep." You know the word for sleep. He did not use it. The other men all laugh at whatever it is he really said.

quote:

Does the king have many friends and helpers?
The old man nods and says something. "He says that the King is much loved by all in the city. He says that he and the others are the King's Mighty Men, who help him slay monsters and do great things.


quote:

Why are you so old?

The man grins at you and grips his spear a bit tighter. "He says that the last time death came for him, he stabbed it in the heart, as he shall do if it comes again."

quote:

Have you seen any other villages like mine?

The man nods.

quote:

Are there any people like me in the city?

Your mother answers this one. "We will be together Sweetling, you don't need to worry, and I think your new friend too."

quote:

What's the city like?

"He says that Zepath is an exciting city with many wondrous things in it and the city closest to the sea."


quote:

What do they have to eat there?

Your mother again answers. "Bread Sweetling, you will love it and cheese and meat and some fish." You have no idea what cheese, onions or bread is but your mother spoke favorably of all 3 once before.


quote:

Are there other friendly beasts like the donkeys?

The man nods. "He says yes, they have donkeys and mules and horses. Um, I have never seen one sweetling but he says it is like a donkey but much taller and swifter and that they run in great pack's by the city, we may even see some on the way to our new home!"


quote:

Do you know any magic?

The man laughs and the other men laugh at the question, he does not answer.


quote:

Why did the king come to my village?

"He says they went out to see what was there" this is standard Kingly behavior according to your mother's stories "but surely they were sent by El to save us."


quote:

Have you been to a lot of places?

"He says that with the Kings father he has climbed the highest heights, swum to the bottom of the sea, soared upon the backs of dragons, climbed to the base of Mount Har and poked death in the eye." The other men laugh when he says this, Tudiya says something incomprehensible and then all of the other men cheer and stomp the bottoms of their spears into the ground for a moment. If he is not lying, you are dealing with honest to goodness heroes here.


quote:

Why is everyone dressed weird?

"This is how people dress in the cities Sweetling" your mother says, without translating.


quote:

What was it like when you were young?

"Different, he says."


quote:

How do you know which way to go in the woods?
"He says that the King knows where to go because he is a king."


quote:

Do you have any children?
"He says that he had many Sweetling and they are with El now."


quote:

Are you older than than the king? (I don't know how we can judge the age of a superhuman king by just looking at him, and we can't count high enough to understand his age.)

Your mother translates. The man laughs and asks Tudiya a question with a grin on his face which might translate to, you think "Am I, eh?" Tudiya says something you don't understand and all of the men laugh again. "He says he is much, much older and it makes him laugh to meet a child who did not know."


quote:

Am I asking too many questions?

He shakes his head "He says you make him feel young, Sweetling."



quote:

Are there whales in the water near your village?

"He says in the sea, but that the city is miles inland. He says there is good eating on one and that they have been caught, but very rarely and more when he was young."


quote:

Are you a good swimmer? (This question is more so we can gloat a little. Barbarians know some things!)

He nods.

quote:

What was Tudiya like when he was younger?

All eyes turn to the old man at this question. "He says the King was a constant trouble maker who turned his father's hair white but that he grew up to become a great king." This answer produces another round of laughter.


quote:

Is Tudiya King because he's the tallest? 'If not because he's tall, how did Tudiya become King?
"He is king because his father picked him as the greatest among his brothers and uncles."


quote:

Will Danal become King if he grows to be tall/whatever it is that made Tudiya King?

"He says if he is the most brave and wise he will but that he is sure to have many brother."

quote:

I like fish, are there any fish where we are going?

"He says there are many fish in the river."


quote:

Why is your hair so grey and your skin so wrinkly?

The man laughs "Because he is old, Sweetling. That is how people are supposed to look when they get old."


quote:

Mr. Ishamal do you have any stories of Leviathan and the other fourth day creatures the angels slew, were any of them sea monsters?

"He says he will tell you one around the fire tonight Sweetling."


quote:

What's your favorite color?

"He says, the sky."


quote:

Can you teach me how to be an adventurer like the guy I'm named after?
"He says that he could but that it will be up to the king to decide what will happen to us and first he wants to get advice from his counse- um wise friends who know things." Your mother says something to him, a question. The man answers. "He says we might be fishermen Sweetling, like with your Uncle Jorah, would you like that?"

Well, what is your answer? Would you?

Minivote!
A. Yes! Fishing is fun and you are good at it!
B. No! You want to be a Mighty Man like them!
C. No! You want to go adventure with Danal!
D. No! You will be King!
E. Some other response! Fill in!



quote:

He is a healthy old man. Our village had healthy old people. What we didn't have was feeble old people. Or sick people. Or disfigured people. In our village if you were sick you either recovered fully quickly, or you died.

Everyone in the party was healthy enough to go for a fun trek through the wilderness. We won't see anything Og would regard as a freakshow until we reach civilization.
This is indeed the oldest person you have ever seen. He is odd and old, though only appears to be in his 60s, if rather buff. You have never seen anyone past their 50s and fairly few of them.

quote:

Are we there yet?
"He says, in a month." For the next hour Danal asks this question every three or four minutes while giggling, till Tudiya tells him to stop.


quote:

Are there such things as good demons?

"He says he will let you know if he meets one."

quote:

How old are you?
"He says um..." you can count one to ten, it then goes lots and many-lots. "He says many, many lots, Sweetling."

quote:

Where were you born?

"He says he was born in Baitel."


quote:

What do you do? Is it fun?
"He says his job is to serve the king and help him do great things." He says something else and the men all laugh. "And yes, it is fun."


quote:

What happened to your hair?
"He says it is a sign of wisdom." Barkof says something and the men laugh. "Barkof says it is a sign he is too ornery to die." Ishamal says something, more laughter. "He says, that too."


quote:

What's your favorite Labaras story?

"He says the one where he and Enkidu go to the Cedar Forest." Your mother gives him a dirty look. You don't know that story.

quote:

Do you like dogs? (If yes, then...) Do you have any? (If yes, then...) How many dogs do you have?

What do dogs do? Can I ride one?

What do dogs eat?

The man sighs. "He says that he likes dog and that he has only one dog, a hero dog named Barkof so big he can scare off bears. He says dogs eat meat."


quote:

What do donkeys eat?

Can I help you?

Do you like me?

What's your favorite food?

Can you cook?

The man sighs and your mother gives him an embarrassed look, but she still translates and he still answers. "He says donkeys eat grass, that he has not made up his mind about you and you can help him by keeping Danal happy with games and out of trouble." At that, Danal, still on your shoulders, makes a battle cry and swooshes his stick through the air at an invisible monster. "He says his favorite food is cheese and yes, he can cook."


quote:

Will I be as tall as you?

"He says you will not be as tall as him because you are not the blood of Labaras Sweetling."


quote:

Squeeze my hand as hard as you can!

"He says he will not, he would break it."


quote:

Do you know any games?

He nods.

quote:

Can I ride you?

Sweetling, that is not a nice question. Your mother does not translate. Tudiya, laughs at what you said. Barkof asks him a question, Tudiya answers and then all of the men laugh. Ishamal answers you "He says he is not a donkey, he does not like carrots." More laughter from the others.


quote:

Did your dad hit you? Does the King hit you? Will you hit me?
Your mother refuses to translate, Tudiya frowns slightly. "Sweetling, you do need to worry, no one will hurt you anymore, we are safe now and everything will be good from now on I promise."


quote:

Can you help Jalitha walk better?
Your mother smiles to you and does not translate. "I am fine, don't worry Sweetling."




I anticipate the next update tonight.

Diogines fucked around with this message at 02:46 on Dec 16, 2013

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
C :buddy:

Changed vote.

my dad fucked around with this message at 17:08 on Jun 11, 2013

ConfusedPig
Mar 27, 2013


C. ADVENTURE :black101:

Task Manager
Sep 5, 2008

A weird time in which we are alive. We can travel anywhere we want, even to other planets. And for what? To sit day after day, declining in morale and hope.
B, Mighty Man!

Edit: changed vote, see below.

Task Manager fucked around with this message at 17:05 on Jun 11, 2013

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

C. ADVENTURE

Theglavwen
Jun 10, 2006

Frankly, I don't know anyone who likes Chinese bronzes, but I have one of the finest collections in the country.
E: No, but just no. Don't elaborate, seem sort of disturbed. This dude just said that the people of his city fish up and eat whales! The children of Asherah, gods. Their fishermen are blasphemers, or dangerous lunatics, surely they must die often, and messily, eaten by Asherah's wrath. When we return to the sea, we don't want to do so as an infidel, and invite Asherah to reclaim us in anger.

FoxTerrier
Feb 15, 2012

Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

Theglavwen posted:

E: No, but just no. Don't elaborate, seem sort of disturbed. This dude just said that the people of his city fish up and eat whales! The children of Asherah, gods. Their fishermen are blasphemers, or dangerous lunatics, surely they must die often, and messily, eaten by Asherah's wrath. When we return to the sea, we don't want to do so as an infidel, and invite Asherah to reclaim us in anger.

I like this. Besides being true to our raisen', it keeps us from committing to a path before we have a better idea of what we're getting into.

Task Manager
Sep 5, 2008

A weird time in which we are alive. We can travel anywhere we want, even to other planets. And for what? To sit day after day, declining in morale and hope.

Theglavwen posted:

E: No, but just no. Don't elaborate, seem sort of disturbed. This dude just said that the people of his city fish up and eat whales! The children of Asherah, gods. Their fishermen are blasphemers, or dangerous lunatics, surely they must die often, and messily, eaten by Asherah's wrath. When we return to the sea, we don't want to do so as an infidel, and invite Asherah to reclaim us in anger.

Changing my vote to this; fits in quite well with our background. Regardless of which god/demon you think is cooler, the kid would be freaked to hear about the whale killing given his upbringing.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous

Theglavwen posted:

E: No, but just no. Don't elaborate, seem sort of disturbed. This dude just said that the people of his city fish up and eat whales! The children of Asherah, gods. Their fishermen are blasphemers, or dangerous lunatics, surely they must die often, and messily, eaten by Asherah's wrath. When we return to the sea, we don't want to do so as an infidel, and invite Asherah to reclaim us in anger.

Actually, I'm going to vote to this. Save the whales!

edit: Like this vvvvvv

my dad fucked around with this message at 17:11 on Jun 11, 2013

Nettle Soup
Jan 30, 2010

Oh, and Jones was there too.

Theglavwen posted:

E: No, but just no. Don't elaborate, seem sort of disturbed. This dude just said that the people of his city fish up and eat whales! The children of Asherah, gods. Their fishermen are blasphemers, or dangerous lunatics, surely they must die often, and messily, eaten by Asherah's wrath. When we return to the sea, we don't want to do so as an infidel, and invite Asherah to reclaim us in anger.

Sort of this, but less of the infidels, more of the "you eat whales?!" If we become fishermen, will we have to eat them!? Also, lets not make a definite choice right now, see where life takes us and how we feel when we get there.

Tsyni
Sep 1, 2004
Lipstick Apathy

Theglavwen posted:

E: No, but just no. Don't elaborate, seem sort of disturbed. This dude just said that the people of his city fish up and eat whales! The children of Asherah, gods. Their fishermen are blasphemers, or dangerous lunatics, surely they must die often, and messily, eaten by Asherah's wrath. When we return to the sea, we don't want to do so as an infidel, and invite Asherah to reclaim us in anger.

I agree.

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger
E Are any of the fishermen heroes? If the answer is 'no', then the silent thoughtful version of E.

Althair
Jul 26, 2006
words are weapons
C

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Lanky Coconut Tree
Apr 7, 2011

An angry tree.

The angriest tree
Gods, demons, priests, whales, angels WHO GIVES A gently caress

I JUST MADE A NEW FRIEND HE'S PRETTY COOL AND GAVE ME A DOG

gently caress THIS I WANNA GO ON ADVENTURE

C

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