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Momomo
Dec 26, 2009

Dont judge me, I design your manhole
There's also the car Leon drove to Raccoon city in RE2. The RE gods realized he hadn't gotten a chance to wreck it, so they sent in a nuke to finish his work.

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Barudak
May 7, 2007

Momomo posted:

There's also the car Leon drove to Raccoon city in RE2. The RE gods realized he hadn't gotten a chance to wreck it, so they sent in a nuke to finish his work.

That car wanted to die. It was suicide by cop.

a creepy colon
Oct 28, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
I just started RE6 coop with someone because there arent very many couch coop games and RE5 was fun but what the hell? We just got into the subway section of Leon's campaign and I just keep wondering when are they going to cut back on the cutscenes and QTEs because i feel like for every 5 minutes of actual gameplay i have to sit through 10 minutes of cut scenes or actions that completely remove me from control of the character. Why did they choose this design choice it feels like im watching someone else play half the time. Is it really like this the whole way through? If so it feels like a huge step backward from RE4/5.

Wanderer
Nov 5, 2006

our every move is the new tradition
I really don't think RE6 had that many QTEs compared to RE4/5, but then again, my threshold for "too many QTEs" was set by Ninja Blade, a game that is literally nothing else.

UnsuitableWasp posted:

I don't know about gay fanbase

Funny story: Chris's design in RE5 was meant to communicate that he'd been punchin' meat and drinkin' eggs as part of his training montage to deal with Wesker, so they wanted to make him look like a hulking brute of a man. When he was rendered and put into place, they belatedly realized they'd gone too far and Chris looked like a textbook example of a particular kind of Japanese erotica known as "bara." Chris instantly acquired a fan following specifically because of that.

Instead of backpedaling, though, Capcom doubled down and started playing up to it with Chris's alternate costumes.

Wanderer fucked around with this message at 23:16 on Jun 24, 2013

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!


How is everyone forgetting the train in RE0? You know the on you take to go from the city to the mansion that connects to the city with a five minute walk? The one that somehow held a giant gently caress off scorpion on it? That thing stood no chance. Or are we just talking about things Leon destroyed?

PureRok
Mar 27, 2010

Good as new.

Limastock posted:

I just started RE6 coop with someone because there arent very many couch coop games and RE5 was fun but what the hell? We just got into the subway section of Leon's campaign and I just keep wondering when are they going to cut back on the cutscenes and QTEs because i feel like for every 5 minutes of actual gameplay i have to sit through 10 minutes of cut scenes or actions that completely remove me from control of the character. Why did they choose this design choice it feels like im watching someone else play half the time. Is it really like this the whole way through? If so it feels like a huge step backward from RE4/5.

Leon's campaign is the worst campaign in the game. Especially how it starts out. It has the slowest start and I think the most cutscenes.

NovaPolice
May 9, 2006

Len posted:

How is everyone forgetting the train in RE0? You know the on you take to go from the city to the mansion that connects to the city with a five minute walk? The one that somehow held a giant gently caress off scorpion on it? That thing stood no chance. Or are we just talking about things Leon destroyed?

Mainly how Leon is the King Midas of destruction derby, but we can extend to how it's really better to go on foot in magical virus land.

I think at this point, the only forms of transit that haven't been destroyed onscreen by Umbrella's legacy are bicycles, horses, and space shuttles unless I'm missing something from a cell-phone only spin-off novel.

The GIG
Jun 28, 2011

Yeah, I say "Shit" a shit-ton of times. What of it, shithead?

NovaPolice posted:

I think at this point, the only forms of transit that haven't been destroyed onscreen by Umbrella's legacy are bicycles, horses, and space shuttles unless I'm missing something from a cell-phone only spin-off novel.

Wasn't there a dead horse in 4?

a creepy colon
Oct 28, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Wanderer posted:

I really don't think RE6 had that many QTEs compared to RE4/5

Man, i got into a car and literally had to hit 5 buttons to start it. RE6 is bloated with the things.

PureRok posted:

Leon's campaign is the worst campaign in the game. Especially how it starts out. It has the slowest start and I think the most cutscenes.

That is encouraging at least.

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

Leon's Chapter 1 is by a huge degree the worst part of RE6.

The Dark Id
Aug 13, 2005

Why
you
know
I
LOVE
THIS SHIT !!!!
[citation needed]

NovaPolice posted:

Mainly how Leon is the King Midas of destruction derby, but we can extend to how it's really better to go on foot in magical virus land.

I think at this point, the only forms of transit that haven't been destroyed onscreen by Umbrella's legacy are bicycles, horses, and space shuttles unless I'm missing something from a cell-phone only spin-off novel.

Let's break down just how many vehicles get blown-up, crashed, or otherwise violently disabled in some fashion in just the Resident Evil games before the series actually got extremely anti-vehicle. Counting only vehicles disabled on-screen, not in massive explosions, and with a playable character in the vicinity of the crash.

Resident Evil 0
- Bravo Team Helicopter: Downed by STARS incompetence.
- Runaway Monster Train: Crashes into the other super secret mansion laboratory in the woods.

2 vehicles destroyed.

Resident Evil 1
:siren: 0 Vehicles Crashed! :siren:

Resident Evil 2
- Police Car: Crashed by Leon's inability to drive in a straight line under duress. Soon smashed by...
- 18-Wheeler Truck: Zombie DUI crash and subsequent explosion.
- Police Chopper: RPD's lack of trigger discipline leads to bullet riddled pilot and crash.
- Birkin's Lab Escape Train: Self destruction mechanism triggered by mutant tentacled rear end in a top hat blob dad.

4 vehicles destroyed. 6 total!

Resident Evil 3
- Railway Car: Blown up by Russian soldier man not wanting to get skullfucked by Nemesis.
- Escape Chopper: Jill forgetting the unstoppable mutant chasing her was equipped with a rocket launcher.
- Nikolai's Chopper: Can potentially be shot down by Jill and a magnum. I'll count it.

3 vehicles destroyed. 9 total!

Resident Evil Survivor
- Helicopter: The game opens with a man in pajamas holding onto a crashing helicopter. Also helicopter crashes can give you amnesia.

1 vehicle destroyed that I remember because I try not to remember that game. 10 total!

Resident Evil Code Veronica
- Cargo plane: Autopilot crashed into Antarctica by crazy cross-dressing man convinced a teenager girl and Canadian Leonardo DiCaprio attacked his corporate death camp island.
- Snowmobile truck: Smashed by tentacles controlled by an ant lady with fire blood. They weren't even her tentacles. What were even the deal with those tentacles? Who knows. But they don't like snowmobiles.

2 vehicles destroyed. 12 total!

4 Resident Evil
- Notspain Police Car: Pushed into a ravine and owners murdered. Sat in by Leon.
- Ganado Truck: Driver shot in the head by Leon and crashes.
- Mine cart: Ridden straight off a cliff because nobody remembered to build an entire track.
- Ada's Boat: Smashed into rocks since Ada is kind of an rear end in a top hat.
- Ganado Truck x2: Shot up by Leon.
- Bulldozer: Crashed into a wall by Ashley. Also Leon was standing on it. I'm surprised it lasted that long.
- American Hero Mike D. Choppa's Helicopter: MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!
- A goddamn Battleship: Sunk by Ada since... I mean what the hell were a Notspainish cult doing with a goddamn battleship?!

9 Vehicles destroyed. 21 vehicles total!

Resident Evil: gently caress Your Ride!

Lunethex
Feb 4, 2013

Me llamo Sarah Brandolino, the eighth Castilian of this magnificent marriage.

ImpAtom posted:

Leon's Chapter 1 is by a huge degree the worst part of RE6.

Do you know the best part? You can't die once you're in that car. You can leave the game sitting at any part of the sequence and...yeah.

Jeedy Jay
Nov 8, 2012
If they have have Chris come out as gay, his beefcake outfits will go from hilarious, lighthearted joke to crass stereotype, and will have to be discontinued. I am very much against that.

AradoBalanga
Jan 3, 2013

Adding to limited's RE6 list:

- Double-Decker Bus: Was already dead. But then Leon used vehicular necromancy to revive it, and let Sherry kill it again.
- U.S. Navy Nuclear Submarine: Used as a lure to bring Ada into the plot. Sunk by Ada.
- BSAA Transport Helicopter x2 in Edonia: Wrecked via Ustanak trying to kill Jake and Sherry.
- Snowmobile x2: Used by Jake and Sherry to outrun a GODDAMN AVALANCHE. Eventually destroyed because Mother Nature don't gently caress around.
- Cave Drill Machine: An attempt by Jake and Sherry to kill Ustanak. Fried the engine in doing so, but not Ustanak.
- Neo-Umbrella Tank: Killed in self-defense by Jake and Sherry while escaping Neo-Umbrella lab. Seriously, where did that tank come from?
- Motorcycle: Jake and Sherry's method of escape from Neo-Umbrella lab. Crashed because plot said so.
- River Boat: Jake and Sherry method of getting to Koocheng. Destroyed via killing a J'avo and getting ground by a large propeller.
- Random Jeep With a Rear-Mounted Gun: Crashed by Piers and Chris whilst chasing Carla by going all Dukes of Hazard onto an aircraft carrier.
- Red Sports Car: Carla's car. Heavily damaged by Chris and Piers chasing her and by also going Dukes of Hazard onto an aircraft carrier.
- Harrier Jet: Used by Chris and Piers to get to the Neo-Umbrella oil rig. Mostly likely destroyed when oil rig collapsed.
- Ada's Helicopter: Survived Ada attacking Simmons, presumably survived Leon escaping China.

So yeah, Leon's got 2 vehicles that survived his touch in his entire lifespan, but every other vehicle he touched got destroyed in RE6. Chris has two vehicles destroyed because of him in RE6 (Leon was nowhere nearby), while Jake and Sherry got about 8 vehicles destroyed between them (one was because Leon was nearby).


Also, didn't the Harrier that Chris and Claire used to escape Antarctica survive?

RocketDarkness
Jun 3, 2008

AradoBalanga posted:

- Neo-Umbrella Tank: Killed in self-defense by Jake and Sherry while escaping Neo-Umbrella lab. Seriously, where did that tank come from?

Through the front door, clearly.

Lunethex
Feb 4, 2013

Me llamo Sarah Brandolino, the eighth Castilian of this magnificent marriage.

AradoBalanga posted:

- Neo-Umbrella Tank: Killed in self-defense by Jake and Sherry while escaping Neo-Umbrella lab. Seriously, where did that tank come from?

Only one tank was destroyed and it wasn't this one. Actually adding to that, I'll go ahead and say the oil tanker that Piers used to destroy a tank counts for this list. That tanker is funny because you don't even need to use it. You can actually run around to the back of the tank and stand in front of it and it does nothing to you. Then if the tanker gets destroyed (Chris can do this, but...) it will kill Chris instantly with no dying phase. Just BOOM, dead.

Lunethex fucked around with this message at 02:37 on Jun 25, 2013

Crowetron
Apr 29, 2009

RE5 doesn't have Leon, but it does still have vehicles!

-Chris's Jeep: Abandoned in Kijuju, presumably remains un-exploded.
-BSAA Chopper: Taken down by bug monsters, within sight of the protagonists who don't really care because Kirk had a habit of shooting rockets at them.
-Bat-Monster Transport Truck: Destroyed by driver being under the influence of brain parasites
-Majini Bikes: Loads of them, blown up by Chris and Sheva in self defense. May not count?
-BSAA Jeep: Crushed by a sleepy Gigante
-Sweet-rear end Airboat: Tragically abandoned in the gator territory, presumably eaten by jealous reptiles
-Josh's boat: Survives unharmed
-Irving's Boat: Trashed by an extreme makeover, but I'm pretty sure it doesn't sink or explode
-ANOTHER BOAT: Abandoned by Chris in a cave filled with spiders, presumably unharmed aside from possible arachnid joyrides
-USS Wesker: Trashed by monster Excella, definitely on fire at one point. I don't think it exploded on screen, but it was probably destroyed
-Wesker's Jet: Crashed into a volcano, largely due to being piloted by no one.
-Doug's Chopper: Desperately escapes, and is safely piloted by Josh into the sunset.

Conclusion: Josh Stone, the LEGEND, is probably the best driver/pilot in the whole series. Chris is extremely careless with his vehicles. Wesker thinks planes are sentient.

Damegane
May 7, 2013
Leon doesn't even need to be on a vehicle to crash it. That bit in RE6 after you exit the subway station and your path is blocked by a car and a bus? Random guy comes riding up in a bike at acceptable speeds but ends up ramping off the car and into the bus, exploding all 3 vehicles. Reason: Leon was nearby.

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!


Damegane posted:

Leon doesn't even need to be on a vehicle to crash it. That bit in RE6 after you exit the subway station and your path is blocked by a car and a bus? Random guy comes riding up in a bike at acceptable speeds but ends up ramping off the car and into the bus, exploding all 3 vehicles. Reason: Leon was nearby.

There's also that ambulance out of nowhere that kills you if you're in the wrong spot.

Spermando
Jun 13, 2009

Len posted:

There's also that ambulance out of nowhere that kills you if you're in the wrong spot.

It only knocks into near-death, and I like to think it's canon.

Marogareh
Feb 23, 2011
Revelations had a small boat get destroyed, another chopper blow up and two cruise liners get trashed.

Shirkelton
Apr 6, 2009

I'm not loyal to anything, General... except the dream.
Bruce McGivern and Fong Lei need to make a come-back as some kind of very specific anti bioterrorism attacks on cruise ships odd couple.

Neo Rasa
Mar 8, 2007
Everyone should play DUKE games.

:dukedog:

Dan Didio posted:

Bruce McGivern and Fong Lei need to make a come-back as some kind of very specific anti bioterrorism attacks on cruise ships odd couple.

I still can't believe RE5 uses the mega space laser and RE6 actually has missions in China but they completely ignored Fong Ling and Bruce McGivern. :(

Spermando
Jun 13, 2009
I wonder what Capcom would have done with the T+G virus if Cavia hadn't called dibs on it.

Shirkelton
Apr 6, 2009

I'm not loyal to anything, General... except the dream.

Neo Rasa posted:

I still can't believe RE5 uses the mega space laser and RE6 actually has missions in China but they completely ignored Fong Ling and Bruce McGivern. :(

It's a much maligned game, but I really, really love it.

Momomo
Dec 26, 2009

Dont judge me, I design your manhole

Spermando posted:

I wonder what Capcom would have done with the T+G virus if Cavia hadn't called dibs on it.

The C virus uses electric powers, so we pretty much did get it in RE6.

limited
Dec 10, 2005
Limited Sanity

Spermando posted:

It makes me laugh that Leon's campaign is the only one that doesn't have a proper vehicle section because anything he gets on goes up in flames before the end of the cutscene.

To be honest that's a blessing because RE's vehicle sections are loving horrible, no fun whatsoever, and should be patched out. Not that I'm biased or anything from trying to ace professional diffculty in five..

Also dammit how could I forget the ambulance in six. It was the first loving thing that killed me in the game. :argh:

Agoat
Dec 4, 2012

I AM BAD AT GAMES
Lipstick Apathy
Am I the only one that wants a Resident Evil reboot? Wasn't there talk of one at one point?

Crowetron
Apr 29, 2009

Agoat posted:

Am I the only one that wants a Resident Evil reboot? Wasn't there talk of one at one point?

Arguably, RE4 was the reboot.

Lunethex
Feb 4, 2013

Me llamo Sarah Brandolino, the eighth Castilian of this magnificent marriage.

Agoat posted:

Am I the only one that wants a Resident Evil reboot? Wasn't there talk of one at one point?

To be fair they always claim that and they never deliver. They said something like that if RE:Revelations did well. I don't really know "how" you would reboot this game unless you made it open world and had RPG elements aside the perfected RE6 gameplay and you get to manage the BSAA and DSO(Leon's Organization) in your battle against global terror etc.

A lot of games seem to be going open world these days so I wonder if RE would?

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Lunethex posted:

To be fair they always claim that and they never deliver. They said something like that if RE:Revelations did well. I don't really know "how" you would reboot this game unless you made it open world and had RPG elements aside the perfected RE6 gameplay and you get to manage the BSAA and DSO(Leon's Organization) in your battle against global terror etc.

A lot of games seem to be going open world these days so I wonder if RE would?

No no, it would be a housing management sim where you try to keep the Zombies and B.O.W.'s safe from roving gangs of idiot police officers who burst into your multi-million dollar multi-unit megamansion.

limited
Dec 10, 2005
Limited Sanity

Barudak posted:

No no, it would be a housing management sim where you try to keep the Zombies and B.O.W.'s safe from roving gangs of idiot police officers who burst into your multi-million dollar multi-unit megamansion.

You know, this is my RE RTS build order;

- Self Destruct System ( Upgrade toward instant activation if someone so much as breathes funny within a mile of it, or alternatively utterly random activation for no reason. )
- Implausibly huge, complicated tunnel system that somehow doesn't collapse the landscape/city above into the earth. ( Hideously complicated locking systems that no sane human being would use are a ESSENTIAL upgrade that will lose the game if not researched. )
- BOW lab ( Upgrade to laughable security/safety standards optional if you have the spare resources. Or skip in favor of none at all. )

Now some people would tech into the random underground smelting facility for bonus Insane Scientist factor, but personally I'd go for random underground catacombs. It lets you spawn impossibly ancient zombie reinforcements. Alternatively I just close my eyes and hit 'OPEN' switches on the security switchboard at random until my hideous genetic war machines flood the area and slaughter everyone including my own staff, and me. Prostrats. :smug:

Scalding Coffee
Jun 26, 2006

You're already dead

Neo Rasa posted:

I still can't believe RE5 uses the mega space laser and RE6 actually has missions in China but they completely ignored Fong Ling and Bruce McGivern. :(
And the Chinese government. It was like the government got harmonized and the army disbanded/became zombies. You have foreigners and American G-Men running all over the place and blowing up stuff.

Wanderer
Nov 5, 2006

our every move is the new tradition

Neo Rasa posted:

I still can't believe RE5 uses the mega space laser and RE6 actually has missions in China but they completely ignored Fong Ling and Bruce McGivern. :(

It wouldn't surprise me if there were strange legal issues around the Cavia characters, since that studio shut down.

Agoat posted:

Am I the only one that wants a Resident Evil reboot? Wasn't there talk of one at one point?

Technically, we're on something like the third reboot right now. The GameCube RE remake counts as one, and as was said, RE4 sort of counts as well.

My one concern with a reboot is that it would either mean completely starting from scratch or you're right back in the loving mansion in 1998 again, and they've already had a really hard time moving on from that as it is. They've done a fair bit of genuinely interesting worldbuilding in RE5 and 6 and it'd be a shame to blow it up and start over. (The BSAA would actually make a pretty good organization to base a tabletop RPG around. An international volunteer squad of soldiers and eccentrics who go out and pick fights with terrorists, bioweapons, and genuine monsters? It writes itself.)

What I would like is for Capcom to stop hiring Japanese TV writers for the series and actually get a storytelling team together so they can plot out a genuine, cohesive plot arc for the series as it goes forward. And as long as I'm wishing, I would like a pony.

Crowetron
Apr 29, 2009

I kinda feel like RE6 is setting the stage for another RE4-esque reboot. 5 had the reunion of the original STARS team, the reveal of Spencer, and the culmination of all of Wesker's evil douchebaggery. That was the big, explosive finale of the original Resident Evil's plot and characters.

Then you get RE6, which makes a big deal about Sherry and Jake, the next generation so to speak, and the evolution of the threats our heroes face. J'avo are basically perfect Ganado, the big meat gorillas are essentially the new Hunters, and zombies return only to prove to be really goofy and easily handled. The old days of the T-Virus are long gone. Leon and Chris, the two biggest male characters of the old days, both spend almost all of their campaigns running around and accomplishing nothing but help the new kids save the world. Neo-Umbrella is easily thwarted, Ada's clone is quickly swept away, and Ada herself spends her entire ending wiping away the remnants of the old series.

STARS and Umbrella and Plagas are all done. They've all done their thing, and the spotlight is quickly leaving them. RE6 is one last denouement for the old guard, and it is loaded with nostalgic fan-service in reverence to them. But in the end, Leon, Chris, Zombies...they're just glorified cameos as they set the stage for "RE7: Jake Wesker, Bug Puncher"

Wanderer
Nov 5, 2006

our every move is the new tradition
The problem there is that Chris's main story beat going out of the game is that he has to keep going or Piers's sacrifice was for nothing. If Piers had lived and Chris had hung up his guns like he'd said, I'd agree with you.

Of course, the real problem is that we're reacting to this as if it has some kind of overarching narrative flow and ah ha ha ha nope.

Q-sixtysix
Jun 4, 2005

Crowetron posted:

"RE7: Jake Wesker, Bug Puncher"

I will preorder this so hard

Crowetron
Apr 29, 2009

Wanderer posted:

The problem there is that Chris's main story beat going out of the game is that he has to keep going or Piers's sacrifice was for nothing. If Piers had lived and Chris had hung up his guns like he'd said, I'd agree with you.

Of course, the real problem is that we're reacting to this as if it has some kind of overarching narrative flow and ah ha ha ha nope.

Chris doing his thing in the BSAA doesn't require him to have a starring role, though. He can pop up every now and then to punch something or save someone via helicopter, or maybe just call Jake every level or so to remind him about the time he fought Jake's dad to the death in a volcano.

Of course, now that I think about it, I wouldn't mind a game starring both Jake and Chris in some sort of weird Capcom remake of Lethal Weapon.

Edit: By the way, Wanderer, I am totally stealing your BSAA tabletop game idea.

Crowetron fucked around with this message at 22:44 on Jun 25, 2013

Captain Swing
Dec 30, 2006

You should have a little more faith in your captain.

Crowetron posted:

Of course, now that I think about it, I wouldn't mind a game starring both Jake and Chris in some sort of weird Capcom remake of Lethal Weapon.

Edit: By the way, Wanderer, I am totally stealing your BSAA tabletop game idea.

And I'm stealing yours. :smug:

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Crowetron
Apr 29, 2009

You are a goddamn hero, Captain Swing

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