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SEE?! I did not know that! When I did it with breastmilk that was my thought, "Well, the good antibiotic stuff in breastmilk will hopefully keep it safe." Good to know. But yeah I don't ever have leftover really, and when I did it was gone within an hour or two.
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Aug 27, 2013 16:41
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skeetied posted:That rule is for formula, not breast milk. Breast milk actually has active antibodies in it that prevent there being a problem. If you want to be particularly cautious, you can change the nipple. Oh, cool. We use pumped breast milk so I guess we are OK.
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Aug 27, 2013 17:34
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Ooo, that's great news! I too figured that the bottle had to be finished in one sitting, since it says everywhere that you shouldn't reheat milk - do you reheat the milk several times if it takes more than one feeding to finish it or do you just serve it at room temperature? We've yet to bottle feed at all so I have no idea how the stuff I've read about works in real life. If she can do her evening nibbling from a bottle or two, we're much closer to freedom. And yeah, we'll go on a daytime weekend date as soon as she takes a bottle reliably, she eats proper meals during the day and naps like a champ in her pram. (pleasetakeabottlepleasetakeabottle  )
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Aug 27, 2013 17:36
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Restaurants usually let you breastfeed if you cover up and ask first. So you don't absolutely have to take a bottle with you. I did this last weekend. We go out to eat at least once a week with the baby. Our method is to take a long walk until she falls asleep in the stroller then head to the nearest restaurant (which works as our area is completely saturated by restaurants.) This has worked ever since she was one month old. My gut feeling is you shouldn't reheat and reheat milk in a bottle. My baby gets the milk at room temperature (or fridge temperature which she hates) because we don't have a bottle warmer.
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Aug 27, 2013 17:49
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^^ Just wanted to say I breastfed lots of places and never asked anyone for permission first. I had a tank top under my shirt and pulled one shirt up, the tank top down, didn't cover up any further than that. Not trying to be a militant breastfeeder but it really can vary by location. I'm in the SF Bay Area and no one batted an eye. I even had normal conversations with friends while feeding, and I had strangers come up and say encouraging things about breastfeeding more than once. I would have skipped those conversations if it were up to me because I'm shy. Anyway - I only say this because if someone had said I had to ask permission to feed in a restaurant I would have been paralyzed by the idea of having to ask that and would have stayed home.
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Aug 27, 2013 18:07
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Hahahaha asking permission to breastfeed. Yeah no.
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Aug 27, 2013 18:10
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You do not have to ask permission to feed your baby. And you don't have to cover if you don't want to. Where the gently caress did you hear that?
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Aug 27, 2013 18:17
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Chickalicious posted:You do not have to ask permission to feed your baby. And you don't have to cover if you don't want to. Where the gently caress did you hear that? I was trying to encourage someone who seemed to be reluctant to go out due to thinking you needed to get the baby to take a bottle, and I was saying there's no need to do so because you could breastfeed in public. No need to take it the wrong way. It is true that in most places you don't need to ask. So far I have anyway. I will refrain from now on if this is the wrong thing to do. DwemerCog fucked around with this message at 18:29 on Aug 27, 2013 |
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Aug 27, 2013 18:27
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Here where I live (WV) my (female) boss and a good chunk of my coworkers are all annoyed with people who want the right to breastfeed in public. I just sat there, thinking to myself, it's a booby folks. Nothing interesting to see here. But there are no laws for breast feeding on the books in this state, they just get shut down in committee.
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Aug 27, 2013 18:28
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DwemerCog posted:I was trying to encourage someone who seemed to be reluctant to go out due to thinking you needed to get the baby to take a bottle, and I was saying there's no need to do so because you could breastfeed in public. No need to take it the wrong way. If you were talking to Sockmuppet, she meant she wanted to have the baby take a bottle because she wants to leave her for a couple of hours with a sitter, not because she didn't know it's possible to breastfeed in a restaurant. I realize you couldn't know, but Sockmuppet, like me, is from Norway and no one would ever think of asking permission to breastfeed here. edit: I didn't mean to be crass DwemerDog! 
bilabial trill fucked around with this message at 19:18 on Aug 27, 2013 |
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Aug 27, 2013 18:36
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rectal cushion posted:If you were talking to Sockmuppet, she meant she wanted to have the baby take a bottle because she wants to leave her for a couple of hours with a sitter, not because she didn't know it's possible to breastfeed in a restaurant. This, we've been out to lunch and dinner a bunch of times and I breastfeed out and about practically every day without me or anyone else batting an eye. You're more likely to get a dirty glance if you feed your baby from a bottle here, because "why aren't you doing what's best for your child!  "
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Aug 27, 2013 18:48
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Sorry for giving advice on a topic I don't know much about. Is it more polite to ask a restaurant before breastfeeding, or more polite just to discreetly do it?
DwemerCog fucked around with this message at 19:13 on Aug 27, 2013 |
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Aug 27, 2013 19:09
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DwemerCog posted:It is true that in most places you don't need to ask. So far I have anyway. I will refrain from now on if this is the wrong thing to do. I think it ends up seeming like we're trying to tell you "omg you are doing it wrong" with everything, and that's not it at all. A lot of this stuff is not obvious, especially if you weren't raised around breastfeeding for example. You never have to ask permission to breastfeed. If you are in a place where you are allowed to have your baby, you are allowed to breastfeed. It's actually illegal for them to tell you you can't. But sometimes if you are in a place you don't feel super comfortable it can help to ask if they have a place available for breastfeeding, as they may have a place you could nurse where you felt more comfortable (not a bathroom, but sometimes a changing room or something like that is calmer and easier, especially if you have an easily distracted baby). If anyone ever tells you you can't nurse somewhere though, you should feel confident telling them that yes, you can. As for bottles, we'll go up to 2 hours on a bottle, but not longer (expressed breastmilk). I'm just not comfortable letting it go longer than that once she's fed off it. We warm it initially and she gets it room temp after that.
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Aug 27, 2013 19:13
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Ceridwen posted:I think it ends up seeming like we're trying to tell you "omg you are doing it wrong" with everything, and that's not it at all. A lot of this stuff is not obvious, especially if you weren't raised around breastfeeding for example. I was not. I still am not really, everyone keeps trying to get me to use formula at least a bit. But I really don't want to. I have plenty of milk so it seems pointless to supplement. Ceridwen posted:If anyone ever tells you you can't nurse somewhere though, you should feel confident telling them that yes, you can. I think I would not want to give offense by doing so, even if it is strictly legal, because I don't want to cause a scene. Unless my baby was hungry on an airline flight or something. Usually it'd be simpler to just go to the next restaurant or something.
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Aug 27, 2013 19:16
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I was in a hifi-store the other day buying a loudspeaker. At the checkout after we paid she started fussing and making her "feed me now!  "-face, and I wondered aloud to my friend where we coukd go to feed her. The guy behind the till immediatelly asked me if I wanted to borrow their stereo-testing-room. So she got her lunch in an amazingly comfortable stressless chair accompanied by exquisitely rendered music 
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Aug 27, 2013 19:32
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The point is that it's not my job to mitigate someone's being uncomfortable when I need to feed my baby. I'm not taking a poo poo on a table. I'm feeding a baby and keeping him quiet in a public setting. I have every right to eat in any restaurant I want and breastfeed my baby. My priority as a mother is to feed my baby, not coddle someone's misguided offense at a breast.
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Aug 27, 2013 20:07
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I appreciate that some women have no problem breastfeeding in public, because we shouldn't, at all, whatsoever. Reality is, though, for many women, it's incredibly stressful because they don't have a supportive community, or they have personal issues with feeling unsafe, or, because of how we're socialized, we don't want to "make a fuss" or offend anyone. I don't think being kinda a jerk to Dwemer, or anyone who could probably use some support, is helping normalize breastfeeding. People tend to just stop asking questions or seeking support when they're met with that. Edit: I was composing this while Chickalicious posted and didn't see it before I hit Submit. I 100% agree with what you're saying. You're not uncomfortable breastfeeding in public and I'm grateful for that because women like you give me someone to look to for example and support. I just feel that a gentler response might be more helpful to women who are struggling with it. sudont fucked around with this message at 20:15 on Aug 27, 2013 |
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Aug 27, 2013 20:07
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Well, for starters, she was offering advice on a problem that didn't exist. Sockmuppet wants her kid to take a bottle so she can leave him alone, not because she's afraid to nurse in public. And then she presented her information as fact, when it is wholly incorrect. I have never in 3 years of nursing a baby and being surrounded by friends who do the same, asked to nurse anywhere or felt like I was obligated to. And presenting as fact that you need to ask permission to feed your child is harmful to women who may already be nervous to feed in public.
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Aug 27, 2013 20:13
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sudont posted:I appreciate that some women have no problem breastfeeding in public, because we shouldn't, at all, whatsoever. Reality is, though, for many women, it's incredibly stressful because they don't have a supportive community, or they have personal issues with feeling unsafe, or, because of how we're socialized, we don't want to "make a fuss" or offend anyone. I don't think being kinda a jerk to Dwemer, or anyone who could probably use some support, is helping normalize breastfeeding. People tend to just stop asking questions or seeking support when they're met with that. I agree. There's a big difference between breastfeeding in public when there are a lot of other women who do the same around or when your social group is fully supportive of breastfeeding, and breastfeeding in public in an environment where it is made clear that people only tolerate it because it's the law and your friends are already pressuring you to bottle feed. It can make something that is natural begin to feel like a political stand. Obviously more women doing it will help it to become more accepted but it can be hard to be the first.
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Aug 27, 2013 20:46
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I take being able to nurse in public for granted, but I would feel really upset and uncomfortable if someone asked me to stop or to cover up, because I have a big problem being confrontational with anyone. So I understand being apprehensive about it! It's not a situation I've ever been in or even thought about being in until I started reading this thread, but I see how that would suck. Edit: agree with hookerbot, I was trying to say something similar.
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Aug 27, 2013 20:52
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Re: bottles of breastmilk: I heat it once and then it stays room temp until it's gone or 4 hours go by. Re: breastfeeding in public-- people are allowed to breastfeed anywhere they are otherwise allowed to be. I am sorta waiting for someone to approach me about it but so far no one has. My friend once asked an employee by the dressing rooms if she could use one to nurse. She was directed to use the bathroom instead. She did not take kindly to that and instead sat down across from that employee and started feeding her son.
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Aug 27, 2013 21:13
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For myself I have huge boobs and am not comfortable breastfeeding in public out in the open but will do so in a private area like a changing room. My husband is always trying to tell me no one is looking/no one cares, but I really need privacy in order to feel comfortable as there's no way I can breastfeed discreetly. I'm so jealous of women who can!
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Aug 27, 2013 21:43
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I've only asked if I could breastfeed in public twice; once was when my son was only a couple months old, and I asked if I could use a changing room for that purpose. (Yes.) The other time was when I was visiting Virginia; I asked at a restaurant if I could use one of the chairs in the "waiting to be seated" area, since there were so many people at the table (and the tables so close together) that I didn't think it'd work to nurse a squirmy toddler at the table. (No.) If Virginia weren't one of the five states where the law doesn't specifically provide that you can breastfeed anywhere you're otherwise allowed to be, I would have mentioned the law and asked if they had a suggestion for where I could sit, but it is, so I didn't. (The other four states are Idaho, Michigan, South Dakota, and West Virginia; Michigan, South Dakota, and Virginia at least exempt women who are breastfeeding from indecency laws. Of the US territories, only DC allows women to breastfeed anywhere they may otherwise be or exempt them from indecency laws, though Puerto Rico requires "shopping malls, airports, ports and public service government centers [to have] accessible areas designed for breastfeeding and diaper changing that are not bathrooms.")
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Aug 27, 2013 21:58
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I had a long post typed up and Safari froze, so I think instead it's time for some nursing pictures   edit: holy poo poo, huge image. Ben Davis fucked around with this message at 00:29 on Aug 28, 2013 |
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Aug 28, 2013 00:21
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This feels like ages ago. 
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Aug 28, 2013 01:34
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I always kind of found it amusing how you'd sit down to breastfeed and it would attract other breastfeeding mothers to you. Safety in numbers! I kind of tried to keep it discreet with Chris but now with Emily I give no fucks, the only place I won't bust out a boob is at the dinner table with other guests, or someone else's table. Seems kind of rude to be so in your face with it at someone else's house.
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Aug 28, 2013 02:16
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Haha if someone invited me for dinner I'd expect that they did it with the understanding that if the baby needs to eat then baby eats too. I'd find it rude if they made a fuss about me nursing at the dinner table 
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Aug 28, 2013 03:38
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Yeah I don't think there's any "in your face" about feeding a baby.
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Aug 28, 2013 07:06
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^^^ welp, this turned out pretty in your face  I will look at this picture of my little Renaissance cherub for comfort when the terrible whenevers kick in.
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Aug 28, 2013 10:27
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DwemerCog posted:I think I would not want to give offense by doing so, even if it is strictly legal, because I don't want to cause a scene. Unless my baby was hungry on an airline flight or something. Usually it'd be simpler to just go to the next restaurant or something. My husband was recently on a flight (California to New England) where the woman next to him changed a diaper on the seat. And he was stuck in the window seat. She had a second young kid with her, so he assumed she didn't want to leave that one to go change the other one, but it's still pretty nasty  but I don't think anyone would have batted an eye if she was breastfeeding instead.
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Aug 28, 2013 12:49
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Abbeh posted:My husband was recently on a flight (California to New England) where the woman next to him changed a diaper on the seat. And he was stuck in the window seat. She had a second young kid with her, so he assumed she didn't want to leave that one to go change the other one, but it's still pretty nasty Where should she have changed the diaper? There is no changing table in airplane bathrooms. The only other option is the floor of the bathroom, the thought of which is disgusting. I would never lay my child on a public bathroom floor to change him. I don't mean for this to sound snarky, but really, many places don't leave you any options.
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Aug 28, 2013 19:14
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What do people generally do when changing babies on planes? I need to go on a transatlantic flight next year, so I am interested in the answer.
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Aug 28, 2013 19:48
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Crazy Old Clarice posted:Where should she have changed the diaper? There is no changing table in airplane bathrooms. The only other option is the floor of the bathroom, the thought of which is disgusting. I would never lay my child on a public bathroom floor to change him. What kind of airplanes are you flying on that don't have changing tables in the bathroom?
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Aug 28, 2013 19:51
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If I remember right, the changing table is over the toilet. Its a tight squeeze but they do have them. Her only other real option would be to see if the attendant could watch her older kid while she's in the bathroom. The changing in seat may have just been the easiest option.
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Aug 28, 2013 19:56
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ghost story posted:If I remember right, the changing table is over the toilet. Its a tight squeeze but they do have them. Yup, it's a table over the toilet that you can pull down, it's a pretty good size but unfortunately it's pretty flat and has no straps to hold the baby in place.
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Aug 28, 2013 20:29
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Lyz posted:Yup, it's a table over the toilet that you can pull down, it's a pretty good size but unfortunately it's pretty flat and has no straps to hold the baby in place. I am wrong then -- I must have missed it, I haven't flown in quite awhile. Although we do take Amtrak frequently and surprisingly although their bathrooms are huge they do not have changing tables. I have asked the conductors about it, but there is no explanation why.  But yes, if a changing table is available, that is really the go to place for diaper changes, but sometimes there just inexplicably isn't one available.
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Aug 28, 2013 21:37
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Maybe letting him get up to go spend some time in the bathroom himself while she changed the baby, but I'm guessing he didn't realize what was happening until too late, or he couldn't bring himself to ask. It just doesn't seem very fair to him, since I hear the diaper was pretty nasty (and the older one needed a change, too, but didn't get one because he kept saying he was fine). Breastfeeding is fine wherever, but biohazards are another story.
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Aug 29, 2013 02:52
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Lyz posted:Yup, it's a table over the toilet that you can pull down, it's a pretty good size but unfortunately it's pretty flat and has no straps to hold the baby in place. Some actually don't have changing tables. I fly a lot with babies and it's pretty common to not have one on the plane. I've had flight attendants tell me to balance my baby on the toilet seat lid to change her.
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Aug 29, 2013 03:32
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I'm so done being pregnant. I'm in the last week, so I've got the random insomnia and for some reason, crazy pelvic pain. Like I'll be walking along and get a random shooting pain where I have to stop. I didn't get anything like this my first go-round, but it sucks. Now I understand why some women wear those weird contraptions that are essentially the pregnancy versions of an orthopaedic brace. All I want to do right now is lie on my stomach and drink a beer.Sockmuppet posted:You're more likely to get a dirty glance if you feed your baby from a bottle here, because "why aren't you doing what's best for your child! This. I both nursed and bottle fed, and nursing would get me "approving" comments from strangers, whereas bottle-feeding would get me dirty looks. I even had some lady tell me "that had better be breastmilk!" Both types of people can gently caress off, it's no ones business if I feed my kid according to whatever standards you have in your head. That being said, if I lived in an area where it's the reverse, I wouldn't be super comfortable to breastfeed in public, because I almost wanted privacy to give a bottle. As far as changing tables on planes, I've never seen a plane without one (though I have no doubt they exist somewhere.) Usually the flight attendants when you get on will ask you if you've flown before, tell you which washrooms have change tables (generally the ones in the back if there are several washrooms on the plane), and have you dispose of poopy diapers in a different bin. Granted, this little talk often happens when you do the preboarding bit, and I've noticed on a lot of american flights, while they announce pre boarding, everyone gets on then, so I can't remember if they do it there. Not sure why they announce preboarding if they don't enforce it?
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Aug 29, 2013 12:01
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All four planes we've been on with Simon did not have changing tables, and on all four flights I changed him in my lap. Every time we've had a young guy in our row and none of them seemed bothered. Two commented on how quiet he was, but that's it. Frankly, if my kid is allowed on the flight but there's no provision made for me to change him in the bathroom safely, then people being bothered by me changing him on my lap isn't my problem.
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Aug 29, 2013 13:09
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