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N, He is a mentor and friend, who has saved me by choice and held me in confidence. Alternately, we could also try to make Azzazel blurt out something by saying something obviously ridiculous like, "Ishamal is my father, you 13 foot turd, and you're obviously afraid of him, so help me or get out of my way."
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Sep 29, 2013 22:12
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M. Except it wasn't a thousand monsters. It was a thousand thousand. No, many lots! The monsters were really tough because they kept regenerating! And then we flew through the air and fought a demon. And then we walked forever. Then we talked to a walking man shark.Diogines posted:
Edit: If he likes that story maybe he'll be willing to bargain for a true story afterwards! LLSix fucked around with this message at 22:20 on Sep 29, 2013 |
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Sep 29, 2013 22:18
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Throwing this out there. He said all the land we can see his. He said he is bound by his word. He said he would mess with his land so we could find no sustenance if we walked away. So we walk away with our eyes closed, having Snarles guide us.
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Sep 29, 2013 22:19
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Minivote: N - I'll tell you everything I know about my good friend Ishamal in exchange for your gourd, filled with water. Or a similar gourd, also filled with water, if you're attached to that particular gourd. Also, ask: Know any good jokes?
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Sep 29, 2013 22:54
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Quornes posted:Throwing this out there. He said all the land we can see his. He said he is bound by his word. He said he would mess with his land so we could find no sustenance if we walked away. So we walk away with our eyes closed, having Snarles guide us. Probably not going to work since we've already seen the land and we're on a quest to become a man. Only little babies don't have a sense of object permanence! Which is to say, I really don't think he's going to buy that and if there even is an argument about it, it's going to go "Can not!" "Can too!" "Can not!" "Can too!" until Azzhole decides "Can too, and I'll do it too no matter what you say!" my dad posted:CHANGING MY VOTE TO: This seems pretty good. I know bargaining seems like a good idea, but on the other hand knowledge of Ishmael seems to bring out this dude's more human side - may as well encourage that instead of bringing him back into "Salesman from Hell" mode.
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Sep 29, 2013 22:56
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Minivote N. Good buddies vote. He is a good friend who often shares his wisdom with me, like "never turn down a chance eat, drink, and have sex" and "don't have an affair with the king's daughter." Maybe some fun stories about our time with Ishamal will get Azz to help us. Or at least be nicer. Deadly Ham Sandwich fucked around with this message at 23:28 on Sep 29, 2013 |
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Sep 29, 2013 23:17
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I'm all for trying to get him to pay us for the information, just as he would, but if it comes around to it either way: N: Tell him that Ishamal is our friend and mentor, and that we met as we battled and fought off the manifestation of Asherah's hunger, while being drawn through the sky by His will.
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Sep 29, 2013 23:45
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Updated to Deadly Ham Sandwich:  ALSO:Slaanc, Disargeria, ShotgunWillie, The_steve You have only noted choices for the minivote. Please rectify this in NEW votes because I am lazy and for other reasons stated in the IRC. Many thanks! E: poo poo I FORGOT ABOUT MINE! I VOTE WITH THE FISH. HiHo ChiRho fucked around with this message at 23:48 on Sep 29, 2013 |
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Sep 29, 2013 23:46
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and please please if you are voting the same as meBasscop posted:N: Tell him that the info is gonna cost him. Either he gives us something or drops his price. Then don't specify how much water or how much to drop the price. Just : "Hmmm now that's gonna cost you. Either you give me and my dog something to eat and drink or lower your price." If he gives us to little then we can still refuse.
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Sep 29, 2013 23:58
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Ask azzhole: Have you ever met Asherah? Also new plan: Azzhole can always take snarls from us, he could kill us whenever he likes we can however there is one thing that he will never be able to take from us by force, our respect. "Azarel, you have me at your mercy, you are a being of incredible power whereas I am a mere mortal, you could kill me now and take snarls from me and there is not a thing I could do about it. But you cannot take my free will, if you kill or watch me starve or die of thirst you will never have my respect. You have great powers without a doubt, but I do not think that you gained these powers yourself but by accident of fate, you are as you always were. Great power is nothing if squandered on simple trickery, and from what I have seen so far, you use your powers for nothing more than tormenting any mortal unfortunate enough to cross your path. The humble ant plays some part in building it's nest, it carries leaves to feed its young, it leaves a better world for future generations than when it was born, in its meagre life this ant has made a far greater contribution to creation than you have in your eternity. You are the poo poo of the world Azzarel and not worthy of the respect of an ant, let alone mine. You can kill me now and carry on for the rest of time knowing that what I say is true... Or you could prove me wrong. This is the bargain I suggest, you allow me and snarls to carry on through our trial without either assisting or hindering us, you will transport us to the point where we would have been had we not met you, fair compensation for the time we have wasted here. In return you have my attention; through the month you tell me of any great works you have achieved, without falsehood or embellishment, if you tell me something that changes my mind about you by the end of the month you shall have my humble apology for the insults I threw at you just now, but more importantly you will have my respect."
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Sep 30, 2013 00:02
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Minivote:
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Sep 30, 2013 00:59
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Don't forget to vote for the actual vote when you minivote! Everytime you forget, El kills a baby Snarls!
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Sep 30, 2013 01:02
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A Dog and his Boy vote: C
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Sep 30, 2013 01:03
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Hahahoho! I am now wondering if Ishamal is gay. Azzazel: "you don't look the type." Us: "Oh? And what 'type' is that?" Sogol fucked around with this message at 01:08 on Sep 30, 2013 |
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Sep 30, 2013 01:04
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Azzazel could you empower my dog to speak as us mortals do? It would only make him worth more sentimentally to me.
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Sep 30, 2013 01:13
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jng2058 posted:Minivote: Goddamn it vote N and put a price on the info it will save Snarls! Someone please think of the children!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qh2sWSVRrmo
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Sep 30, 2013 01:15
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Minivote N, going with Basscop's plan. Let's use this leverage!
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Sep 30, 2013 01:16
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It's good to hear there are more stories about people cheating on contracts with the devil, but I still think trickery is a bad idea. On the current mini-vote, it doesn't seem like Azzazle is asking us for information he desperately needs or values. He can literally poof anything of his will into existence, so if he really wanted to know he would have offered the world to us by now. It sounds more like a genuine interest; he recognizes the name of an old friend he hasn't spoken to in years, then he wonders how the old stump is doing. It's not information we can really hold for ransom. The better approach is to make a casual namedrop, tell Azzazle what Ishamal means to us, and then make him feel bad about trying to scam the friend of a friend. J.
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Sep 30, 2013 01:32
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HiHo ChiRho posted:Why do you deny that El has dominion over you? Changing my vote to  plan Sogol. At least we try, if he refuses the offer we can go 
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Sep 30, 2013 01:34
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Just to be clear a 1-I vote for The Test means if it does not work we go with Team C. If he does not agree to The Test or does not give us the items exactly as they were, resuming the form he had when we found him, we are just outa there, no more talking of any sort. If he does give us the items, we are just outa there with the items and water for Snarls. We have not violated any contract, we are just taking all the time necessary to consider and implement slaying an apparently immortal divinity. Apparently this was not clear before, if that makes any difference to anyone. This means it is Team C consistent either way. Sogol fucked around with this message at 01:46 on Sep 30, 2013 |
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Sep 30, 2013 01:37
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Zybourne Clock posted:It's good to hear there are more stories about people cheating on contracts with the devil, but I still think trickery is a bad idea. This is a being that explicitly wants our suffering of losses. Why offer him freely information that he DESIRES to be "MINE", when he is asking us for our loved ones for items (food/water) that a host show freely give, and wealth/power beyond measure?
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Sep 30, 2013 01:40
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C. Decline his offers and walk away towards the treeline. It is probably two or three days away and Snarls seems certain it is the closest source of water. It is probably not close enough, even if you are ridiculously stubborn and seem pretty tough, your dog is not. Snarls probably won't make it.
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Sep 30, 2013 01:47
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Yeh a straight C vote has a very high likelihood of killing Snarls.
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Sep 30, 2013 01:48
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This is why I wanted to send Snarls to Danal: Keep them both safe from goons. Voting with Sogol for the minivote, N. Please, goons. Think of our loyal Snarls, who we have had since he was just a puppy. Don't just walk away with no thought to his eventual death by dehydration. Vote for I, vote for The Test.
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Sep 30, 2013 02:02
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HiHo ChiRho posted:This is a being that explicitly wants our suffering of losses. Why offer him freely information that he DESIRES to be "MINE", when he is asking us for our loved ones for items (food/water) that a host show freely give, and wealth/power beyond measure? Because he's just going to shrug off our attempt at bartering information for water. He has an infinite supply of water, food, and gem-encrusted scepters to give away, and has been trying to push it all on us the moment after his transformation. If our information was worth anything at all to him, he would have offered us food and water after namedropping Ishamal's name. Azzazle is in the business of demanding tributes from unsuspecting strangers, and when we mentioned Ishamal he briefly switched his 'doing business' hat for a 'having a social life' hat. Regardless of whether we trick him or just walk away from this confrontation, he's going to dislike us a lot. But if he finds out we have a mutual friend, he may feel too guilty to drain the land of water or scare away all the beast. I think it's the best solution to avoid getting scammed/killed.
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Sep 30, 2013 02:02
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For further clarity here is one way The Test dialog could go, in principle, though it is likely to be a bit messier in practice.The Test Strategy posted:
We will have to be very resolved though since he is likely to try to turn it into a deal. It is not a negotiation. It is the terms for continuing negotiations. He meets them or he does not. No room in between. If he agrees, when we have the stuff we walk away. He asks 'what'? We say we are working on killing him and he should have a care. We are not sure how long it will take. He will likely rage at this point. The next three days on his land will be bad, but they are going to bad anyway and if this works it gives Snarls a chance. Or he says 'no' up front and we just walk away. In that case he may say 'wait' and we go back to the top. It is not a 'deal'. We give him nothing no matter what. It is a condition of negotiation. Our conditions are met exactly or we walk. It will work or it won't. We either walk away with the stuff or we all away without it. We are walking away no matter what though. Please don't fixate on my poor wording, but on the form of the thing as Dio will do a much better job of playing this out for better or worse. Sogol fucked around with this message at 02:27 on Sep 30, 2013 |
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Sep 30, 2013 02:19
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No good can come of trading this thing anything. It's ten pounds of untrustworthy in a three-pound bag. But if we don't get something from him, Snarls will die. I don't think tricking him will work out well for us in the end. We still have to survive out here, on his land, after dicking him over. Tread lightly. Still, it IS a clever thing, and I'd approve if it were done. I vote N - trade him the story of Ishmal. It is a thing he Desires, and desirable information is valuable - we know this, because he's offered to trade us information for Snarls. Our mind is closed to him, otherwise he wouldn't be asking us. How we came to know Ishmal is therefore rare information - he can't figure it out for himself, any more than we could learn what Labaras is like. Want gives things value. Wouldn't you just Love to know?
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Sep 30, 2013 03:14
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A Its just a dog, we can get a replacement pet in the future! There's nothing special about this dog other than we like it a bit. M The Great Men love telling a grand story, so we should definitely follow in his footsteps. Azza will recognise we are telling the story in the way of Ishamael and know our affiliation will be true, and we will make him laugh a lot. He seems like he needs a good story to lighten up.
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Sep 30, 2013 03:22
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You assholes had to vote to bring the dog. Not flint. Not a weapon. See what you've done now?  We should probably just give him the damned dog. Snarls is what 7 years old now? And he's a large dog. His best years are behind him and he can't have that long left whatever we do. Even today with veterinary care large breed dogs around 50 pounds live up to 10-12 years, while giant breeds over 100 pounds rarely live more than 8. Unless he's a descendant of Laberdoodleous and has 6 toes he's not long for this world. C. Head for the water. Carry him if necessary. Hopefully Azzhole is making an illusion that makes the forest appear farther away than it really is. That's the direction Snarls suggested we go, on his head be it. Edit: Oh, and if he dies we eat him.
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Sep 30, 2013 03:38
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Angela Christine posted:You assholes had to vote to bring the dog. Not flint. Not a weapon. See what you've done now? EAT THE PUPPY 
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Sep 30, 2013 03:48
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Angela Christine posted:We should probably just give him the damned dog. Why are you not voting A, then?
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Sep 30, 2013 03:53
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Vavrek posted:Why are you not voting A, then? Well, maybe the dog is magical. We're in olden times. In a few years Zeus will start turning into a bull to knock up mortal ladies (and perhaps cows). Have we ever actually checked how many fingers he has? Could be a magic dog. Diogines hasn't actually mentioned he's getting geriatric. Besides, Azz is clearly an rear end in a top hat. There is probably some element of trickery. Even if he does exactly what he says with no trickery, it doesn't seem to be what a month-long manhood trial is all about. The priest would probably be pretty happy if we brought back a jeweled robe as our offering, but it wouldn't be right. Stabbing a guy and stealing his poo poo in hour 1 of the trial would be wrong, and so would bargaining with a demon/angel/wizard/thing for an easy month of leisure. A Good Man would not do that.
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Sep 30, 2013 04:08
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Anyone voting to give up our dog is a cold douche who's never known the joy of owning one That said, I'm voting Plan Sogol and N for the mini vote. Tell him Ishamal is an old friend who we've known since we were a child. A great guy, we hang out a lot where I come from. See if we can keep him talking until evening. Demand shade for the bargaining session Make sure we give no specifics. No details. Also if we walk away, do it with our eyes closed and Snarls pointing the way in our arms. gently caress this guy and his 'power over all you see' rubbish. We can keep Snarls hydrated at the cost of some of our blood. If needed anyway. Lanky Coconut Tree fucked around with this message at 04:20 on Sep 30, 2013 |
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Sep 30, 2013 04:13
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Angela Christine posted:Well, maybe the dog is magical. We're in olden times. In a few years Zeus will start turning into a bull to knock up mortal ladies (and perhaps cows). Have we ever actually checked how many fingers he has? Could be a magic dog. Diogines hasn't actually mentioned he's getting geriatric. Fair points. For what it's worth, I did ask: IRC posted:[09/29@19:48:24] <Vavrek> Diog. Angela Christine has raised an important point. I'm going to call this one "Inconclusive", for the time being.
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Sep 30, 2013 04:30
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"Uhg, the sun is too hot and I'm too thirsty to talk."
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Sep 30, 2013 05:37
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Well, I made an  I was as psyched about trying The Test thing as calling someone's mother a Minotuar. Once in a lifetime opportunity really. Granted we did get our rear end kicked for that.
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Sep 30, 2013 05:41
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Azzazel wants Snarls because of our sentiment towards him, right? Well, what do we have that's sentimental for us? Memories. We can offer a memory to him, one that's important, but not too important. Say, the memory of collecting snails for our "father" or one of going fishing with our uncle.
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Sep 30, 2013 06:05
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Voting N - Sogol/Uppatree style wheeling and dealing (which is I for the main vote) 1 - Trade the story if Ishamel for "Before we commence the tale/negotiation, a little food, water, and your word under our law of hospitality, that you wont do me any harm after its been eaten, as a guest in your home?" 2 - Give the food and water to Snarls 3 - Your move goat fucker Then, even if we have to give Snarls to him, at least we know he can't be harmed while he's his 'guest' in his house, which is all he lays his eyes on apparently(?). I don't know maybe someone can lawyer this up better or something. alpaca diseases fucked around with this message at 08:46 on Sep 30, 2013 |
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Sep 30, 2013 06:44
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I think we should just leave.
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Sep 30, 2013 08:14
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What if instead of all this scheming and wordplay we just hugged it out? What if we just got sentimental at Azzazel?
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Sep 30, 2013 08:57
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