Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Under the vegetable
Nov 2, 2004

by Smythe
So that wrestling game I was working on, it started as an apoc world hack, but now it has no stats (stats are now the same thing as 5 "fundamentals" every wrestler knows, which are very general moves like "when you perform an action in an effort to maintain the illusion of reality in wrestling, that's a WORK" "when you make a real-world action within the fictional reality of wrestling, you SHOOT") and character progression is looking like it's about to have no levels, with 1 for 1 xp/moves within an existing gimmick(move path/tree/grab bag), higher ratios for new gimmicks or roll bonus increases.

Also I have two different HP trackers with two different kinds of HP, sort of. "Count" which is, you know, a 3-count, and it's for during the match, and is like, meta, and it works like HP usually does but on a smaller range. You can "heal" by using certain moves, so building a character to emulate hulk hogan or something, and "hulking up" when you start kicking out at 2, that resets the Count. A lot of things can affect Count. There's also "Out" which is, the real person you're playing as' health and well being. That's a 10-notch thing, and only serious events cause it to go down. It's non-recoverable. After a certain Out your character has to take injuries and/or disfigurements, but also gains the ability to choose moves from unique pools. At 10 your character dies, probably because of their own choices.

I'm on a roll here! this might be the first project I finish in forever!!

Under the vegetable fucked around with this message at 21:09 on Mar 17, 2014

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

SirPhoebos
Dec 10, 2007

WELL THAT JUST HAPPENED!

I'm working on a campaign setting for Pokemon Tabletop United based on Pokemon Conquest. Right now I have a minor fluff issue that I'd appreciate some help on.

For those that don't know, the setting of Pokemon Conquest is divided into 17 kingdoms, each corresponding to a different Pokemon Type. Since Pokemon Conquest came out, though, Gamefreak has added an 18th Pokemon Type (Fairy). So to keep the theme of the setting consistent, I need to add a new kingdom. The only problem is that I want to use a Japanese name, even though I don't know Japanese.

Based on the names of the other 17 kingdoms, what would be a good Japanese word that synonymous with 'Fairy?' To give you an idea of what the pattern is, here are the other kingdom names: (English/Japanese (google translation)):

Normal: Aurora/Hajime (Beginning)
Fire: Ignis/Kaen (Blazing)
Grass: Greenleaf/Aoba (Fresh Leaves)
Water: Fontaine/Izumi (Fountain)
Fighting: Pugilis/Kobushi (Fist)
Lightning: Violight/Shiden (Purple Lightning)
Bug: Chrysalia/Sanagi (Pupa)
Ground: Terrera/Daichi (Earth)
Psychic: Illusio/Genmu (Illusion)
Rock: Cragspur/Kigan (Strange Rock)
Dark: Yaksha/Yaksha (nature spirit)
Poison: Viperia/Dokuga (Poison Fang)
Flying: Avia/Tsubasa (Wing)
Steel: Valora/Fukutsu (Indomitable)
Ghost: Spectra/Mitama (Spirit)
Ice: Nixtorm/Fubuki (Blizzard)
Dragon: Dragnor/Ryu (Dragon)

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?

SirPhoebos posted:

I'm working on a campaign setting for Pokemon Tabletop United based on Pokemon Conquest. Right now I have a minor fluff issue that I'd appreciate some help on.

Google indicates that Yōsei(bewitching spirit) is the Japanese word for western fairies, so you might as well go with that. Not like it's any less direct than any of the other names you're using. Can't really help you with the English name, but do you really need that much help thinking of a city name with "fair" in it?

ProfessorCirno
Feb 17, 2011

The strongest! The smartest!
The rightest!
Yosei is used in other Japanese games and such as a stand in for what would in the west be "fairy" so yeah, go with that.

SirPhoebos
Dec 10, 2007

WELL THAT JUST HAPPENED!

Thanks! :)

Libertad!
Oct 30, 2013

You can have the last word, but I'll have the last laugh!
Here's my sexy new project for the Pathfinder RPG:

Nice Things for Fighters

The purpose of this sourcebook is to provide feats, traits (background stuff you pick for your PC), and archetypes (alternate class feature packages) for martial characters in Pathfinder, fighters especially. Many of the options are much more powerful than standard Pathfinder baselines to make up for a lot of the class' weaknesses, and more than a few require a minimum number of levels in Fighter (or Barbarian, or Monk) a la Weapon Specialization to make the feats more exclusive to the class beyond some quick dipping.

I understanding that in order to truly bridge the gap that primary spellcasters must be taken down a peg. But that is a far more ambitious project, and for the time being I want to focus on giving out some nice options for Fighters and non-casting martials to make them relevant for a longer period of time in the campaign.

Your thoughts, comments, and suggestions are all appreciated!

Mr.Misfit
Jan 10, 2013

The time for
SkellyBones
has come!
Hello everyone, canīt really believe my first post to be on the GWW but hey, thatīs how life goes. As it is, I am currently working on a diceless rules system but find myself badly in the need of some serious playtesting. If I were to translate the rules-as-is in itīs current form could any of you point me towards where I could get a test run going? Not to mention some critique of the rules as to their current state?

I apologize if my english is bad, itīs not my native language.

Mr.Misfit fucked around with this message at 16:13 on Mar 24, 2014

surmasampo
Feb 20, 2013
Still working on my game and next alpha play test is due for Easter. Been forming and writing conflict actions and getting feedback to shape my game which is really helpful. Great to have another set of eyes with critical analysis skills to provide a bit of light and clarity. Also helps fuel that creative engine.

Got the conflict sheet player aid made which should speed up play. Got at least another couple quick reference player aids to make before the next play test as well. Wish I had more than a couple hours a day to work on it.

Rulebook Heavily
Sep 18, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
Neglecting my progress in here, haven't I. Then again, I've been busy.

I posted about Dungeon: Legacy way back in January. It's not even clear for Alpha testing, but I've made considerable progress.

quote:

The high concept is "bands of adventurers enter a dungeon, retrieve loot, use it to build a community". This is very much in the vein of what inspired it, a little web game called Dungeon Robber which is itself based on the AD&D appendices where you can randomly roll up a dungeon on the fly. My original concept was "that game, but not poo poo with pointless things in it", so you know I'm off to an excellent start. I've also done a basic design document.

I've since added some clear developmental goals, specific card mechanics and more into the document. It doesn't look like much for two months of work, but the foundation I'm laying here helps me with designing the actual initial dungeon, something I'll be doing next.

SirPhoebos
Dec 10, 2007

WELL THAT JUST HAPPENED!

I've been reading up on the rules for PTU, and I'm starting to think about how to implement the unique fluff aspect of Pokemon Conquest, namely that warriors (the equivalent of trainers) have an empathic link with their Pokemon.

If anyone is interested in helping me with this project (either with this part of it or doing other stuff like flesh out regions, work on other mechanics) I'd be most appreciative.

P.d0t
Dec 27, 2007
I released my finger from the trigger, and then it was over...

:siren: THIS THING GOT A HUGE READABILITY FACELIFT :siren:

With headings and bolding and more spacing and even some charts and a table of contents!
Also, rearranged information to be a bit more sensical and organized.

Probably some major system updates soon to follow, so stay tuned.

P.d0t fucked around with this message at 08:42 on Apr 2, 2014

JackMann
Aug 11, 2010

Secure. Contain. Protect.
Fallen Rib
I'm working on a setting for FATE Accelerated Edition. It's a light, simple setting where the characters are doodles. That is, little drawings, the sort that people write in the margins of their trapper keeper, or that get posted to the fridge door by adoring parents. Everything from stick figures to And they can make their own temporarily animated drawings to fight and work for them. So, your character might be a stick figure, or a monster, or a heavy metal guitarist, or a manga self-portrait of a high school girl. And they live in a land made of drawings, and have adventures against other drawings, and against scribbles, and erasers, and the like.

Here's the current source document. Right now, I'm trying to think up other interesting areas that might be fun to adventure in before I start writing up a few sample adventures.

echopapa
Jun 2, 2005

El Presidente smiles upon this thread.
If you're a Fiasco player, I'd appreciate it if you checked out my new playset and gave it a test drive.

It's called "Zion Curtain" and it's set among the Mormons of rural Utah.

Libertad!
Oct 30, 2013

You can have the last word, but I'll have the last laugh!
I know I've been slow for such a short document, but I'm taking steps to make sure I'm doing things right.

The good news is that I have my final draft for the Abstract Thief, got legal advice on the OGL, got the artwork I need, and all I have left to do is edit, format, and layout the product into a PDF form.

I plan on downloading a 1 month free trial of Adobe Creative Cloud, but things are currently crazy at work (I'm leave work at 6:30 PM on average), so I won't do that until things die down. In the meantime I'm viewing online tutorials of InDesign for beginners.

Specifically this one by Tasty Tuts, which is really helpful.

So is there anything important I need to know about InDesign that he doesn't cover, or problems specific to designing a standard 2-page spread layout of RPG works?

Digital Prophet
Apr 16, 2006

"..and then came the black crow, herald of doom, who foretold the coming of death."


Wow, I didn't actually know this thread existed but it is the best thread.

I've been working on a d20-in-space game for about 3 or 4 months now when work allows and I've got it mostly hammered out at this point and though the book is playable now (im actually running it for my local group as a playtest right now) its not anywhere close to prime time as far as layout and such.

If anyone has some time on their hands and would like to look at something and tell me how broken it is, you can download the latest version of the pdf here: http://www.gawaintheblind.com/files/ird/

I would really appreciate any feedback. My group is currently tearing it apart pretty well, hence all the edits (which are continuing) and I want to get it in a more finished state before I think about art and layout. (i'm going to look at scribe tonight thanks to this thread, i'm at work now)

My question is, has anyone released a d20-based game, and do you have any pointers for licensing and such? I'm not sure where we are with 3.5 being replaced by 4 and NEXT or whatever they're calling 5. I'm planning on releasing this for free or maybe PWYW, but I don't want to step on any toes over at games workshop.

Snorb
Nov 19, 2010
Just a couple nitpicks so far:

*You're using the basic 3.5e skillset, which has three skills related to perception (Listen, Spot, Search.) You can safely roll these into a skill called Perception or Notice. Same deal with Climb/Jump/Swim (Athletics) and Balance/Tumble (Acrobatics).

*On the Family Makeup Chart, you can change option 6 (reroll) to "6: One of your parents is dead (roll 1d4. 1 or 2, your mother is dead; 2 or 4, your father is dead.) You have 1d4-1 living siblings (Roll on Sibling tables for siblings, and Reason For Death table for your deceased parent.)"

Digital Prophet
Apr 16, 2006

"..and then came the black crow, herald of doom, who foretold the coming of death."


Snorb posted:

Just a couple nitpicks so far:

*You're using the basic 3.5e skillset, which has three skills related to perception (Listen, Spot, Search.) You can safely roll these into a skill called Perception or Notice. Same deal with Climb/Jump/Swim (Athletics) and Balance/Tumble (Acrobatics).

*On the Family Makeup Chart, you can change option 6 (reroll) to "6: One of your parents is dead (roll 1d4. 1 or 2, your mother is dead; 2 or 4, your father is dead.) You have 1d4-1 living siblings (Roll on Sibling tables for siblings, and Reason For Death table for your deceased parent.)"

I'll add those to the list for the next update. Thanks. Just adjusted the update I made earlier today.

Digital Prophet fucked around with this message at 23:44 on Apr 17, 2014

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks
I'm still working on my Swords of the Eastsea thing and it's about maybe 70% done right now. Still need to do a whole lot of drudgework with rules and flesh out some setting stuff.

Here's my Norse dudes in case someone wants to read it. Not really done yet, but I was showing it to people on IRC just now and figured I could post it here too: http://pastebin.com/j8QdpN5Z

Covok
May 27, 2013

Yet where is that woman now? Tell me, in what heave does she reside? None of them. Because no God bothered to listen or care. If that is what you think it means to be a God, then you and all your teachings are welcome to do as that poor women did. And vanish from these realms forever.
This might be an odd question, but does anyone know if there is any problem with making a game that uses warhammer fantasy 3rd edition or edge of the empire dice? Normally, I'd wouldn't wonder about the legality of such things, but normally game companies don't make their own custom dice. Once I'm done with some things I'm working on now, I'm thinking of making a game that uses those dice as they are very interesting to me from a mechanical perspective.

Foolster41
Aug 2, 2013

"It's a non-speaking role"
I'm working on too many games right now. Currently my two big projects are:

"Mrs. Bennett"
a card game about being a lady of limited means during the Regency era who has daughters you are trying to marry off to the best suitors. Basically based on the novels of Jane Austen, specifically Pride and Prejudice.

I don't have a lot so far. I thought each lady/suitor would have four stats mapped to the four playing card suits: Beauty/Handsomeness, Grace, Intelligence and Interest, and there would be "social events" that would map in some way to the suits (perhaps making it "trump" with some sort of trick-taking mechanic. I was thinking you'd do checks during these events to get 3 links, which would mean they get married.

I also wanted to have special effects you can play to improve/worsen ladies or suitors, but I'm not sure how this works, how best to balance the cards since I don't think I can make them all exactly just as good. Probably the simplest thing would be to make it so high face have less good effects. The other problem is distribution of numbers. I feel like I probably need to have it pretty equal (like a playing card deck).

My other current game is
Foam fight wars (Yeah, definitely working title)
It's a miniatures game with combat based somewhat on foam sword fighting that uses an action-point based system like the classic Fallout.

I wanted a game where the weapons all really feel different, and you have to feint your way into the optimal range of your weapon, so a halberd might have a range of 3, but it can't attack (or at least not as effectively) at a closer range. So a guy with a sword or even dagger is trying to get in close. Because of how it works I need to make the squares pretty small, so one character is actually covering a 2x2 square area. (using D&D 25mm scale, that'd mean they are 1/2" squares)

Each weapon has a guard range that you can't just move that close to a unit. Instead you have to do a sort of mini-game thing where both the moving character and the character they are moving close to choose and play face down one of two types of cards:

For the moving character, they can choose "nothing" or "Advance". Advance costs 2 Action Points (an average unit gets 6 AP per turn), and you may move into a square that is within the guard range of a unit.

The defending character can choose "nothing" or "guard". Guard costs the Action Points of their weapon, and if the moving character choose "advance" and they get to attack.

I haven't gotten a chance to test this against another person yet (I just started writing it yesterday), so I'm not sure if this is boring or interesting. I feel like there needs to be a third type of card in a cycle, like rock-paper-scissors, but I'm not sure what it'd be.

I was also thinking AP can be saved up to boost defense as well, so one part of strategy is not moving as far to be more defensive.

Foolster41 fucked around with this message at 00:56 on Apr 19, 2014

Tollymain
Jul 9, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Foolster41 posted:

I'm working on too many games right now.

:downs::hf::shepicide:

I think this is sufficiently complete to release into the wild. I wish I was in a position to playtest it :(

Unnamed Game About Exorcists

P.d0t
Dec 27, 2007
I released my finger from the trigger, and then it was over...

Covok posted:

This might be an odd question, but does anyone know if there is any problem with making a game that uses warhammer fantasy 3rd edition or edge of the empire dice? Normally, I'd wouldn't wonder about the legality of such things, but normally game companies don't make their own custom dice. Once I'm done with some things I'm working on now, I'm thinking of making a game that uses those dice as they are very interesting to me from a mechanical perspective.

I don't have a in-depth knowledge of either game, but couldn't you assign the symbols to numbers on the dice, thus reverse engineering the whole thing?

Error 404
Jul 17, 2009


MAGE CURES PLOT
One possible issue from a consumer pov:

I've never played eote or whfrp, how tough is it to get the dice? If you made this game, and I only wanted to play your game, would I have to buy 2 other unrelated games just to do so?

That could be a deal breaker for some folks.

Rulebook Heavily
Sep 18, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
The dice are sold separately, but it's still a "speciality store" kind of deal.

Error 404
Jul 17, 2009


MAGE CURES PLOT

Rulebook Heavily posted:

The dice are sold separately, but it's still a "speciality store" kind of deal.

That is good, but still something dude will want to consider wrt building his game around those dice (assuming legality, etc.)

As for the legality of it, I'm the furthest from a lawyer anyone can ever get, but I know game mechanics can't be copywritten, buuuuuut I think those dice as a physical product probably are.

That said, you can probably take the mechanics you like, you just need to design new symbol-dice to go with them.

But if you're just making your thing for you and friends, go hog wild.

surmasampo
Feb 20, 2013
I have my second Alpha playtest this weekend. I have a little work to do and an additional player aid to create. Since I have lacked the spark to write the last 2 weeks I have been reading a few games instead.
One was very disappointing as it was pretty awful/
Numenera was well written and edited but lacked the level of actual design effort I would expect for the funding and author.
Runemaster 6 was amazingly good.

Also, I have found that I hate fonts and typesets.So time consuming for what is probably very little benefit.

"Failure to plan on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."

Tollymain
Jul 9, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
I really wish somebody would give me some kind of feedback on my doc there :negative:

Bigup DJ
Nov 8, 2012

Tollymain posted:

I really wish somebody would give me some kind of feedback on my doc there :negative:

Formatting it to any significant extent might encourage people to read through it and give you feedback?

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks
I finished something. Well, more like I finished it a long time ago and realized only now that it's actually finished.

https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B4ZpWdqILVFvWGhJQWdCeE13VDg/

tl;dr: inspired by Delta Green, no Lovecraft, no X-files conspiracy stuff.

neonchameleon
Nov 14, 2012



Tollymain posted:

I really wish somebody would give me some kind of feedback on my doc there :negative:

Capital letters and a clear structure would help.

From what I've seen it feels like a problem in search of a solution - it's feeling like it wants to be Black Stars Rise. Also I'm not entirely clear what you think exorcists do. You've four moves: Defy Danger (fair enough), Hit Something (again fair enough), Remember a Fact, and Divination/Telepathy.

Your social interaction move is to use Uncanny Nature to pluck a thought out of their head and manipulate them. That just feels wrong. I'm not sure whether it feels more or less wrong than the idea that you don't mechanically get an advantage by looking at and listening to the ghost. There's nothing wrong with getting information from pre-existing knowledge, but you get nothing about a ghost's motivations from examining what it is doing? You need a Read a Person or Sitch analogue that isn't using memory or supernatural senses. I'm pretty sure you also need some way of running away from the spooky unless the game is just about making a circle around the ghost and praying...

And it looks as if two of my *World hacks are going to start playtesting soon so I'd really appreciate any feedback.

Houses and Wands (with handouts) - my ridiculous Harry Potter hack inspired by Mimir on these boards.

My Silver Age (Marvel) Superheroes (with handouts and playbooks). The Harry Potter one is the one that looks as if it will get a blind playtest.

Foolster41
Aug 2, 2013

"It's a non-speaking role"
I've been working more on the minitures game, which I'm now calling "Feint wars" (Still a working title, but not as stupid sounding at least)

I got rid of the card mechanic and instead both bid a number of dice that affects the oppertunity attack and the moving character's attacks this turn. (so the moving character in this case defends with their attack attribute). Test playing against myself, I think this works much better, since it doesn't slow the game down as much and blends into the next actions (attacking).

I'm considering some sort of element with cards (like a common deck of numbered cards) and some sort of bluffing/bidding element, but I'm not sure if that's too many mechanics, but I like the idea of more hidden elements, which can be hard to do in a table top minis game where everything seems to be generally laid out in the open.

Here's what I have so far for rules, feedback is welcome.

Tollymain
Jul 9, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Bigup DJ posted:

Formatting it to any significant extent might encourage people to read through it and give you feedback?

neonchameleon posted:

Capital letters and a clear structure would help.

It's a rough draft. And I draft better when I don't use capitalization, I don't know why I just do :v:

neonchameleon posted:

From what I've seen it feels like a problem in search of a solution - it's feeling like it wants to be Black Stars Rise. Also I'm not entirely clear what you think exorcists do. You've four moves: Defy Danger (fair enough), Hit Something (again fair enough), Remember a Fact, and Divination/Telepathy.

If you've got a better word than exorcist for the concept please tell me, it's a clumsy fit and it bothers me.

neonchameleon posted:

Your social interaction move is to use Uncanny Nature to pluck a thought out of their head and manipulate them. That just feels wrong. I'm not sure whether it feels more or less wrong than the idea that you don't mechanically get an advantage by looking at and listening to the ghost. There's nothing wrong with getting information from pre-existing knowledge, but you get nothing about a ghost's motivations from examining what it is doing? You need a Read a Person or Sitch analogue that isn't using memory or supernatural senses. I'm pretty sure you also need some way of running away from the spooky unless the game is just about making a circle around the ghost and praying...

The lack of a Read social move is intentional. The playbooks aren't supposed to be socially adept people. When they get results in social interaction it's generally going to be through knowledge of a key fact in play or through being a spooky weirdo.

As for situational stuff, the thinky stat/basic move were originally more like that but some feedback i got from a few early readers indicated they didn't like it. There's still the Eagle's Eyes move. How much does that cover what you're thinking of?

Why would they need a specific move for running away? This isn't a Scooby-Doo hack. Although that could be hilarious.

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks
Yo Tolly, speaking as someone who constantly keeps bothering people to read and comment my stuff, try fixing the formatting before dumping it on people. It's more ok to show incomplete stuff too, but bad formatting makes things hard to read. Besides, formatting a rough draft is rear end, do most of your planning on paper or something before writing stuff down.

neonchameleon
Nov 14, 2012



Tollymain posted:

It's a rough draft. And I draft better when I don't use capitalization, I don't know why I just do :v:

If you want comments make it easier to read. Although that doesn't seem to be helping my hacks right now...

quote:

The lack of a Read social move is intentional. The playbooks aren't supposed to be socially adept people. When they get results in social interaction it's generally going to be through knowledge of a key fact in play or through being a spooky weirdo.

That doesn't help with the lack of "Read a Sitch" - when walking into danger they can't see what the danger is from looking around. As for Read a Person, I'd make it an optional move called "Cold Reading" - with questions like "What would cause them to lose their temper?" Emphasising that even when they can do it it's something they can do oddly.

quote:

Why would they need a specific move for running away? This isn't a Scooby-Doo hack. Although that could be hilarious.

Call your run away move "Tactical Retreat" because sometimes all hunters run into things that are too much for them - and he who fights and runs away...

Libertad!
Oct 30, 2013

You can have the last word, but I'll have the last laugh!
Alright guys, I downloaded a free 30 day trial of Adobe Creative Cloud! I have confidence that I can finish my Abstract Thief project within this time!

Edit: And I'm making significant progress! Woo-hoo!

Libertad! fucked around with this message at 02:16 on May 3, 2014

P.d0t
Dec 27, 2007
I released my finger from the trigger, and then it was over...
Alright, I finished rewriting my Unnamed RPG. I made all the changes I had in mind (streamlining equipment, ability scores gone, skill system tweaked) and then pasted in the remaining content from the previous draft, making minor edits as needed.

Dare I say, this game is done. :ohdear:..?

I'm gonna try and get my face-to-face gamers to play this sooner rather than later, but if anyone wants to run it in the meantime, any/all feedback is appreciated.

demota
Aug 12, 2003

I could read between the lines. They wanted to see the alien.
Threw together a document for Burning Hearts: Hot-blooded Heroes. It's an RPG based on shonen fighting manga (with primarily Jojo in mind). It's far from complete, but I intend to use this document in a playtest on Sunday.

Lemme know what you think!

Bigup DJ
Nov 8, 2012

demota posted:

Threw together a document for Burning Hearts: Hot-blooded Heroes. It's an RPG based on shonen fighting manga (with primarily Jojo in mind). It's far from complete, but I intend to use this document in a playtest on Sunday.

Lemme know what you think!

Cool! Here's my comments:

I've actually been working on something similar to this - I posted about it here. In the beginning I was doing exactly what you've done - splitting actions into fictional and mechanical elements. Eventually I came to the conclusion that this was a bit clunky and I was basically doing it out of habit.

Just split actions into triggers and outcomes instead! For instance, here's a rewrite of Bypass with a mechanical trigger: When you discard a matching pair, describe how you ignore a trait for one action. And here's a rewrite of Defend: When you would suffer an injury, you can discard a matching triple and describe how you avoid it.

In regards to Speak, "[saying] something of substance [for] as long or as short as you like" is an incredibly vague, awful trigger. How do you determine whether something's substantial? If the speech can be "as long or as short" as I like, don't mention length at all. I don't think Speak, as it's written now, makes fictional or mechanical sense. Where in the media you're referring to does an opening speech actually grant people power? If I was you I'd just say both parties got 5 cards at the beginning of the clash and you could ante them for initiative - high numbers beat low, pairs beat singles and so on - then both parties discard whatever they ante'd. I'd also replace Speak with mid-battle quip action which grants you a card and takes up your turn.

Keep your formatting consistent in the actions you've written up - in some you've got "diagetic" first and in others you've got "requirement" first. If the system you've written forces you to format your mechanics inconsistently, figure out what's causing that and change it.

"Diagetic" should be "diegetic", but if you decide to use it again replace it with "fictional" because that's more common language and it's easier to understand. Cut "attempts" from all your actions - give them a clear trigger which results in a guaranteed outcome. Lastly, it'd be cool if you had a system for giving your opponents negative traits and exploiting them. When you exploit an opponent's disadvantages, matching sets require 1 less card.

I hope this helps!

demota
Aug 12, 2003

I could read between the lines. They wanted to see the alien.
It does, yeah!

The "Speak" as an action doesn't actually represent anything to power people up in the game's universe. It's actually there to reinforce the shonen fighting manga genre. I'll make the intent clearer.

One of my concerns is that people who play the game might treat it like most games, where you say stuff before the battle, then after, and maybe a few callouts during, then that's it. In shonen fighting manga, people never stop talking, and breaking an old habit is hard.

I realize it's pretty vaguely defined, and I intend to tighten that up a bit after the playtest. Examples of shonen speech would be say, an enemy explaining exactly how their power works during the fight, or having a heated back and forth about the concept of justice while one participant is currently sailing through the air in a jump kick. Dialog in shonen is weird and not something people would readily get into, so I've set the system up so players are required to engage in dialog in the middle of combat if they want to do anything.

It might be a bit draconian, but hey, that's what the playtest is for.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Misandu
Feb 28, 2008

STOP.
Hammer Time.
Scheme tokens seem sort of under powered in the current version. I have to toss three sets of three suited cards in order to use it, and I'm always going to use it for an Exploit. I haven't tested this out but just from reading it over I'd suggest marrying 'Scheme' and 'Exploit' into one action that gets stronger the more Scheme tokens you spend.

To clarify, 'bypassing' a trait via Exploit counts towards the "all enemy traits disabled or bypassed" aspect of 'Seize Victory' correct?

Someone else already commented on 'Defend' having you discard a random card. Is there a hand limit? Why would I ever use 'Defend' other then for Scheme tokens? If there's supposed to be a hand limit then is 'Bypass' ONLY for using 'Attack' while ignoring a trait? Once I use 'Bypass' how long does that Trait stay bypassed for the purposes of 'Seize Victory'?

Have you considered having other aspects of the cards besides the suits matter? Maybe Offense and Defense actions could require different types of hands?

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply