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Gotta go with Lewan. Incognito isn't even gonna be in the league anymore. Also, Lewan just looks like a massive meathead rear end in a top hat.
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May 23, 2014 03:24
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| # ? Jun 1, 2024 16:09 |
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Incognito for his long history of being a total douche.
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May 23, 2014 03:40
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I like how people are voting for Lewan and using his face as a reason I can barely tell the difference between the two. They are the same. In fact, I think Richie is slightly worse. Lewan looks more like generic meathead man, incognito looks like meathead man with smug boyish face, like he's 12 years old in a meathead body, pushing you around. Vote Incognito
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May 23, 2014 03:48
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Incognito. A full career of douchebaggery beats the rookie douchebag.
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May 23, 2014 03:59
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Richie managed to get himself kicked out of two football factory type programs while he was in college. I mean you have to be an amazing bastard to make that happen.
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May 23, 2014 04:04
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Incognito. For many of the reasons listed but for also giving a few reasons why we would not want to peek behind the curtain of some NFL locker rooms. 1) Bullshit macho culture. 2) Bullshit media who dare not criticize the NLF players. 3) having to hear that his victim should of handled it by "taking a swing at him." I mean, it's really awful and his doucheness brought to light more douchiness. Think about it, Incognito's douchebaggery created more douche. That has to be worth a vote.
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May 23, 2014 04:15
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In a battle between the Gregory Peck and Peter O'Toole of douches, you've gotta go with the veteran. Taylor Lewan will be back, while Richie Incognito might be gone next year.
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May 23, 2014 04:26
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Like myself and others have said, Lewan needs more seasoning. He has "Incognito 2.0" written all over him, and a bright future ahead in douchery, but I'd rather wait until he takes actual NFL snaps before he takes up that lofty mantle. Threatening a rape victim is bad, yes, but at least Lewan isn't an actual rapist (that we know of). What did Richie do? He literally molested a volunteer on a golf course. This wasn't just him on his own time, either, no. This was a loving charity golf event, where you're presumably supposed to be on your best behavior and put on a good face for the community. Richie failed to clear that low, low bar so badly the Dolphins had to pay off the woman so she won't press charges. Richie acts like a caricature of a bully from a cliched 80s high-school comedy, except he's not in high school, this isn't the 80s, it's not a comedy, and he's not a caricature--he's all too real.
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May 23, 2014 04:28
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Taylor Lewan is just getting started in his douchebaggery, and as such I am going to treat this year for him like a quality mid-major college basketball team making their first entry into the NCAA tournament: they're in the conversation nationally and everyone knows to look out for them in the next few years. However, I have had the pleasure of watching his opponent act an utter wanker at two programs: Nebraska, because my dad went to school there and thus still follows the Huskers, and the Rams because I live in St Louis. Thus, I am voting for Richie Incognito, because on sheer body of work he takes it by a long shot.
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May 23, 2014 04:41
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Richie Incognito's Douche Sun is setting in the west, and and his douchy doppelganger is rising in the west. They're both extremely douchy, so I'm going with the rising star over the setting sun. Taylor Lewan
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May 23, 2014 04:52
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When it is this close, you gotta go with the veteran. Incognito
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May 23, 2014 05:48
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Richie Incognito molested a woman at a charity golf event. He destroyed his own sports car with a bat. He bullied an offensive lineman to the point where the man broke down mentally while appearing in a video that implored fans to behave themselves. He earned more penalties when he was with the Rams than any player over that period. He fought with his coach at Nebraska, St. Louis, and Buffalo. He got thrown off his college team, his first pro team, and his last pro team for being a douchebag. He's such a tremendous douche that Oregon wanted nothing to do with him. Richie Incognito is a supreme, platonic douchebag. He must win this matchup.
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May 23, 2014 06:51
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incognito
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May 23, 2014 06:51
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Incognito's douche behaviour made such waves this last year that even a couple of people here in the UK who don't follow American football at all asked me "what's with this Incognito guy? He sounds like kind of a prick". All the more astounding when let's face it we all know he has 13 plus years of pro douche behind him and this is just the tip of a giant doucheberg. The man should be going for lifetime achievement.
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May 23, 2014 09:51
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SlipUp posted:incognito
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May 23, 2014 12:17
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The new feature that I was recruiting people for a few days ago was to have pregame interviews for each douche. The one for Incognito came in a little late, so rather than editing it into the match post, I'll put it here because it's beautiful and needs to be read. I'll credit each author after their douches get eliminated. So, here it is: And now a word from the contestants: Interviewer: Mr. Incognito, thank you for agreeing to speak with us to - Richie Incognito: *Begins humping the interviewer* "Let it rain! Let it rain! Let it rain!" Interviewer: "Mister... Mister Incog... Mis... SECURITY!" RI: "Whoa! Whoa man. It's cool. It's cool, I just kinda zoned out there a sec. Thought I was on the golf course or somethin'. You know, I like to play in those celebrity tournaments, give back to the community, you know." Interviewer: "Of course... I was just wondering if we could get a statement from you concerning your nomination." RI: "Oh yeah! I'm really psyched, you know. I'm glad that we can put all the lies that my teammates have been telling behind us so that I can be recognized for my contributions in getting the Rams' OL to give up fewer sacks than several different NFL teams!" Interviewer: "Um... Mr. Incognito, we're referring to your nomination in the Ben Roethlisberger Douche of the Year competition, a contest you entered as the number one seed in the Players' bracket RI: "gently caress yeah man!" Interviewer: "You're... glad to be nominated?" RI: "Hell yeah, son, I'm a free loving agent now. There's no such thing as bad publicity, amirite? That's why I got back on Twitter, you know. Let people see the real me instead of the bullshit that they're getting fed." Interviewer: "Yes, how has your search for a new team been going?" RI: "Oh it's awesome man, I've been getting interest from all sorts of teams." Interviewer: "Which ones, if we might ask?" RI: "Oh you know, a couple teams. Here and there. I mean not all of them have told me to stop calling. And I've been getting lots of support too." Interviewer: "From whom." RI: "Well just last week, Donald Sterling called me up and asked if I wanted to come join him for one of the Clippers' playoff games." Interviewer: "Really?" RI: "Yeah, man. He said that he knew he didn't have to worry about who I'd be bringing. He's a real classy guy." Interviewer: "Of... course. This whole episode with your former teammate, Johnathan Martin is, of course, not the first incident you've had on the wrong side of the NFL. There were the series of incidents with the Rams that led to you being pulled from games and waived." RI: "That was all just media hype. I play with passion, I've never apologized for that." Interviewer: "Perhaps, but in four years you incurred more penalties as well as more unnecessary roughness penalties than any other player during the span." RI: "Is it my fault everyone else is a pussy?" Interviewer: "Well that same year, your own peers voted you the league's dirtiest player." RI: "Man, they just couldn't handle the reality of football. You gotta be tough to play football." Interviewer: "Was that why you were suspended indefinitely from Nebraska during your college career?" RI: "Come on, you get in one or seven fights with your teammates in the locker room, give a couple of them concussions, and suddenly it's all 'ohhh, you've gotta go to anger management. You're too extreme for us.' Buncha fa-." Interviewer: *Interrupting quickly* "Well then let's turn to more recent matters. One of the reports that circulated following the scandal was that you taunted an ethnically Japanese trainer with racial slurs." RI: "We were just kidding around." Interviewer: "According to the report, you donned Japanese headbands, cornered him in the locker room, and threatened to beat him up and rape his wife in revenge for Pearl Harbor." RI: "You see? Just a bunch of horseplay, that's all. Who doesn't talk like that sometimes, amirite?" Interviewer: "Er... quite. So then what are your feelings today regarding your old teammate, Johnathan Martin." RI: "Look, I don't see what the big deal was. So I called him a few names, so what? He's an adult." Interviewer: "According to him, you forced him to pay you tens of thousands of dollars so that you could take weekend trips in Vegas." RI: "So? He didn't have to pay. He could have fought me and the rest of my guys at once. He must have wanted to give me that money, and now he's whining about how bad we are. Boo hoo, he's an NFL player, he's got enough money." Interviewer: "Well according to the reports, you actually took a fair portion of his rookie salary." RI: "That's just the way it is, man. Besides, at least he's still on a team. Where'd he get signed again?" Interviewer: "The Forty-Niners." RI: "San Francisco eh?" *Makes a limp-wristed gesture* "Figures." Interviewer: *Uncomfortably* "Right... so er... before we wrap things up, is there something you'd like to say to all the fans out there." RI: "I wanna thank everybody for standing with me. Everybody who knows that I'm just misunderstood, and who doesn't just assume that everything they read about me is true. Guys like Keith Olberman, who ran a piece last November about how I'm More than just a Bully." Interviewer: "I'm... not entirely certain he was supporting you in that video, Mr. Incognito." RI: "Huh? I mean to be honest I haven't really watched it yet, but I figured he's got my back, so I retweeted it." Interviewer: "Of course. Well thank you Mr. Incognito, for agreeing to speak with us." RI: "No problem man. Hey, uh this award thing? What was it called?" Interviewer: "The Ben Roethlisberg - " RI: "Yeah, whatever. Who'm I up against huh?" Interviewer: "In this round, I believe your opponent is Taylor Lewan." RI: "What? Taylor loving Lewan? A loving Rookie?! Are you loving serious. Look at that pansy-rear end motherfucker, does he even lift?! gently caress Taylor Lewan! What the gently caress kind of name is Taylor anyway. I bet he's a loving nCENSOREDr. I WILL poo poo IN HIS loving MOUTH!" Interviewer: *Rapidly backing away* "Thank you Mr. Incognito. Back to everyone in the studio. RI: *From a distance* "gently caress YOU TAYLOR LEWAN, YOU'RE A loving ROOKIE! I'LL KILL YOU!"
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May 23, 2014 15:16
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I'm going to have to vote Incognito for his long term commitment to Douchery and the fact that he actually loving molested a woman at a charity golf event. gently caress him and his stupid man-child face.
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May 23, 2014 15:17
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Just think that there's a non-zero chance these two could end up playing on the same team.
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May 23, 2014 15:20
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And here is the Lewan interview for those who missed it. These interviews, assuming they are submitted in time, will be in the match posts, so read them all! The interview: And we have an interview from the douche himself:"Incognito, eh? I like that name, it really fits how anonymous, how unknown, how nothing you are. I'm a better player and a better man than that clown. When I'm on the field, I'm there to win, to beat the other guy. That's just how I am. This guy was barely starter quality on a bad unit, nobody outside of Miami would have one clue who he was if he didn't stir up childish drama. I'm famous before stepping onto an NFL field. It hurts me a lot, you know, being compared to someone so low, but if I'm here, I'm going to win. That's just how I am."
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May 23, 2014 15:26
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If I don't vote for Lewan, am I promoting the rape culture? If I don't vote for Incognito, am I promoting the bully culture? This is the hardest choice I've ever had to make on the internet. I'm going to vote for Incognito, but before the internet throttles me for my choice, know this... gently caress BOTH of these guys. At least Lewan threatened a rape victim TO HELP HIS FRIEND. Incognito is a toxic pile of human filth and deserves to eat poo poo forever. He's not a good enough person to call up a rape victim and threaten her for his buddy, Johnny Marts. edit: Oh my God, I just re-read that and I'm voting for Lewan. edit: loving... Incognito Chilichimp fucked around with this message at 19:34 on May 23, 2014 |
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May 23, 2014 15:27
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Ben Has Tiny Weenus posted:beautiful Amazing 
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May 23, 2014 15:39
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Taylor Lewan threatened to rape a rape victim. End of story. Richie Incognito was already punished for his comparatively minor crimes.
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May 23, 2014 17:14
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Incognito should be handed a lifetime Douchechievement award anyway, he's been a colossal douche forever and the douche dam (ew) just broke last year with the Jonathan Martin stuff.
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May 23, 2014 17:16
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Chichevache posted:Taylor Lewan threatened to rape a rape victim. End of story. Richie Incognito was already punished for his comparatively minor crimes.  Richie Incognito
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May 23, 2014 17:24
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Elotana posted:
Sweet poo poo... Why do you assholes have to continue making this vote difficult to decide on!
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May 23, 2014 19:14
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Holy poo poo. I knew Incognito was an rear end in a top hat but this is beyond ridiculous. gently caress Taylor Lewan but gently caress Richie Incognito more. Lewan is basically a mini Incognito in training, and obviously the teacher must move on in order for Lewan to take his place. So my vote is Incognito.
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May 23, 2014 19:30
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Mughe posted:Holy poo poo. I knew Incognito was an rear end in a top hat but this is beyond ridiculous. Always there are two. The Master, and the Apprentice.
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May 23, 2014 20:07
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Elotana posted:
While this does fall outside of the timeframe of this competition, I feel this still helps paint the picture of how much douche is buried in the foundation of Richie Incognito.
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May 23, 2014 20:11
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Gonna have to go with Taylor Lewan for bullying a rape victim.
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May 23, 2014 20:13
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Looks like Ray Rice is trying to make a Final Four runquote:ryan van bibber @justRVB 6m
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May 23, 2014 20:16
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Lewan
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May 23, 2014 20:19
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Benne posted:Looks like Ray Rice is trying to make a Final Four run Haha. It's like when Dick Cheney shot that guy.
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May 23, 2014 20:22
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Elotana posted:
Yep, Incognito it is! I knew I made him the background of the players section for a reason (it was because his jersey was blue).
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May 23, 2014 20:23
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Benne posted:Looks like Ray Rice is trying to make a Final Four run Baltimore Ravens @Ravens Janay Rice says she deeply regrets the role that she played the night of the incident. ugh
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May 23, 2014 20:31
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Please please fellow electors to the Douche of the Year award, let us focus on the matter at hand. Taylor Lewan is fine candidate and no disrespect is intended to this man and all his future accomplishments, but he is the lesser of two evils. If he were facing anyone else but Incognito he may well advance, but he IS facing Mr. Richard Incognito, or Hidden Dick as some have called him. Taylor Lewan threatened to bully a rape victim, a horrible deplorable crime against a single person. Mr Incognito is a crime against humanity. His every existence is a living and breathing assault against all human decency and proof alone that if God does exist he is a cruel and vindictive god. Hidden Dick has molested a woman at a chairty event, using his athletic privlege to victimize a volunteer! He bullied a team mate to the point that said individual is no longer able to work! He created an environment so toxic that it very nearly brought down an entire organization, and did cost more then a few men their jobs. Mr Lewan is well on the way to perhaps surpassing the deeds of Richie Incognito, but he is there yet.
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May 23, 2014 20:50
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armoredgorilla posted:Baltimore Ravens @Ravens And now it's EXACTLY like when Dick Cheney shot that guy.
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May 23, 2014 20:52
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Incognito gently caress you Richie, I liked Jon Martin. If I could vote for both I would.
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May 23, 2014 20:52
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I don't vote Incognito for all his past behaviors, because sometimes the brightest stars burn out fastest; this isn't a lifetime achievement award, so why consider his sordid college history and everything prior to this year? I vote for Incognito because everything done this year was so spectacularly middle-school-bully douchey, and then on top of it all he goes and sexually harasses some random employee of a gold course? Lewen was pretty douchey, but to out-do Incognito we'd need 2009 Chris Johnson levels of stand-out, and while he's quite a douche I don't think he really stands out from the competition.
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May 23, 2014 21:19
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I’d never even heard of Taylor Lewan before this year’s nomination process and I must admit it looks like he’s got a long career of douchery ahead of him. However, Richie Incognito’s turbo-douchery this past year was only exceeded by Greg Schiano’s. Therefore he gets my vote this round.
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May 23, 2014 22:06
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| # ? Jun 1, 2024 16:09 |
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anime gently caress pillow posted:While this does fall outside of the timeframe of this competition, I feel this still helps paint the picture of how much douche is buried in the foundation of Richie Incognito.
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May 23, 2014 23:28
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