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Giving away free copies of my novella, Tall Tales of Felony and Failure. If you enjoy the story, I'd appreciate a sentence or two review on amazon, B&N, itunes, or goodreads. The book also has a terrible facebook page that has no content other then jokes I've cut and pasted from the forums.quote:Tall Tales of Felony and Failure is a hilarious, mind altering, soul deadening ride through the eyes of a mildly insane and somewhat super-powered protagonist, Cranston Staigne. After discovering his ability to control time, Cranston embarks with his cohort Tom on a drunken escapade across three continents. During their travels, the pair commit numerous crimes, evade authorities, and cheat death. It’s magnificent decadence and dereliction as they explore unlimited power and unrepentant failure. Download links: mobi epub Thanks!
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:27 |
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# ? Apr 25, 2024 23:30 |
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Sabel easily claims the first post.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:28 |
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Thanks op, i needed something to wipe my e-rear end with
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:30 |
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how many erotica would you classify this book as
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:31 |
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ill write a review anyway
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:32 |
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Nice lens flare on the cover art. It really something something somethings your something something.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:32 |
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op's facebook posted:Do you want to know why women hate winter storms? Before it happens they anticipate something exciting and after its all done they are lucky if they get a few inches. op why
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:38 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:39 |
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books are for fags
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:40 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:41 |
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the gently caress kind of last name is haustrumerda
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:42 |
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what about if i hate your book op, do you still want me to review it?
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:46 |
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Oh boy, you are going to regret this very quickly. "Like Oscar Wilde and The picture of Dorian Gray before him, Warren Haustrumerda takes you on a moral journey that is in parts incredibly funny, and in others really sad - but a thoroughly satisfying read all-round." Your friends reviews are hilarious.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:52 |
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sounds like some retarded worthless poo poo op. did they not like it at tv tropes?
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:54 |
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WarrenH posted:Giving away free copies of my novella, Tall Tales of Felony and Failure. If you enjoy the story, I'd appreciate a sentence or two review on amazon, B&N, itunes, or goodreads. The book also has a terrible facebook page that has no content other then jokes I've cut and pasted from the forums. You've been around these fine boards for the past four years; what made you think this could ever be a good idea?
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:54 |
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FrozenVent posted:You've been around these fine boards for the past four years; what made you think this could ever be a good idea? This. I wrote a book and I wouldn't want my horrible posting in any way connected to my horrible dr. who/MLP slash fanfic novel.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 20:57 |
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Tales of the Gas Chamber - the op
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:02 |
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quote:There is no coffee pile. I manage to scrounge some sealed single-serving pouches of instant from
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:05 |
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uG posted:Tales of the Gas Chamber - the op Thanks for reminding me to vote this thread a 1.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:05 |
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quote:Some old Asian army officer-looking guy walks up to Tom and me, followed by two little jackbooted goons in fatigues. The old guy is bent and wrinkly in his crisp uniform. His goons are stern-eyed and metal-helmeted. lol goons!
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:06 |
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real talk you're a genuinely bad writer
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:07 |
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quote:I don't know how this is going to pan out, so right now I'll just enjoy my time on the PATIENCE. She's a good ship, and I've gotten very good at what I do here. I am literally thrilled daily by my successes. the second to last line of your book includes "I am literally thrilled daily..." that is some awkward rear end phrasing imo
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:10 |
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soul deadening
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:11 |
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Fandyien posted:the second to last line of your book includes "I am literally thrilled daily..." that is some awkward rear end phrasing imo It's called "Penultimate" you loving pleb you clearly don't understand the author's vision.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:15 |
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Fandyien posted:the second to last line of your book includes "I am literally thrilled daily..." that is some awkward rear end phrasing imo I hate to do this to you, as you have already sacrificed, but could you read and post more? For us.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:15 |
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Here is an excerpt from my novel (so you can get an idea of how to be a good writer:quote:It was a dark and stormy saturday night. Rainbow and Juicy Juice were taking shelter in the barn, taking turns brushing each other manes. They had to hold the brushes in their mouths because they are ponies. Soon they dropped the brushes and began licking each others faces like they were covered in apples and hay. A familiar scent wafted up to Rainbows snout. "Now I know why they call you Juicy Juice." Then they both giggled. It goes on but you get the drift. You really need to develop your voice and tone as a writer.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:29 |
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wtf how does OP know what rear end tastes like! lmao!
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:30 |
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you should hit up critiquecircle.com, its pretty good and more likely to get you informed criticism than gbs. its cool that you're putting yourself out there but maybe hit up the thunderdome over in TBB, they can probably help you a lot too
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:41 |
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Hobohemian posted:I hate to do this to you, as you have already sacrificed, but could you read and post more? For us. quote:We're panting and sweating by the time we finish. I'm pleased that, during the assault, I'd found time to use the words I’d been saving since our car ride in Cambodia. I remove the dead agent’s slacks, which are much fresher than mine, and clumsily put them on after removing my own.This pleases me to no end. lol the dude who wrote this cant distinguish between Hitman games and real fiction
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:43 |
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This will end well.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:43 |
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WarrenH posted:Giving away free copies of my novella, Tall Tales of Felony and Failure. If you enjoy the story, I'd appreciate a sentence or two review on amazon, B&N, itunes, or goodreads. The book also has a terrible facebook page that has no content other then jokes I've cut and pasted from the forums. got a kindle code? I'll read it and write a review. Can't promise it'll be good though.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:44 |
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lets make this thread the #1 google result for possible child rapist and author Warren Haustrumerda
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:46 |
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quote:This answer is both good and bad. It doesn't seem we're in any immediate danger, but I can't this book is literally insufferable
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:46 |
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uG posted:lets make this thread the #1 google result for possible child rapist and author Warren Haustrumerda that sounds like work. Its sunday, don't work on sundays
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:46 |
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"I've seen some dude's prolapsed rear end in a top hat, on the internet."
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:47 |
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Too bad the author is gonna be too much of a puss to come back and post in this thread, seeing as this is his first post in like a year. That would have been funny as hell.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:48 |
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basically this book is about a gay, retarded 12 year old's fantasy mary sue time travelling and pining after his retarded friend, tom.
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:50 |
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Hobohemian posted:Too bad the author is gonna be too much of a puss to come back and post in this thread, seeing as this is his first post in like a year. That would have been funny as hell. ha ha. OP please come back. I want to read your book and give a good review on all those sites you listed
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:51 |
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Honest Injun!
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:52 |
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# ? Apr 25, 2024 23:30 |
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did you remember to find-and-replace every instance where "Sam" or "Dean" is stuttered or something? i hate when people miss one and it's like "shove y-your b-big d-d-d-dick up my a-rear end, D-Jaden"
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# ? Jun 8, 2014 21:52 |