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You know what CinemaSins does right? What's the Damage.
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Jun 21, 2014 07:16
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Cracked's formula is getting stale. The site needs to give their writers the freedom to write their articles any way they want instead of forcing every contributor to Make it a listicle so it'll get hits; Remember to crack wise every other line because it say in our mission statement that we're a comedy site; and reference lots of stuff that nerds like because that's the demographic that reads us. A lot of the lifestyle articles are really interesting (especially the ones where the writer has gone out and interviewed someone in X profession) but I can't, off the top of my head, think of one that wouldn't be improved if was written in a less jokey style and with a less clickbaity structure.
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Jun 21, 2014 08:25
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Given that Cracked hires John Cheese's EggMan bullshit to write about his daddy issues and alcoholism for the gazillionth time, Winston Crabtree to writes the most platitudal sold-out nerdbait in a way that would shame Michael Ramirez and Mike Lester, jerks off military jingoism in probably the most hypocritical way possible ("O-O-OO-O-O-OOMG DID YOU KNOW THAT A VIDEOGAME YOU CAN PLAY AS CHE GUEVARA EXISTS AND THAT'S MILITARY INDOCRINATIONS ON OUR CHILDREN'S MEDIA??? Btw the IDF runs a totally epic summer camp where your kid can become a badass like Zoltan!"), argued for underpaying creatives, hires Luke McKinney to write the most resentful poo poo against anyone who isn't a total science fanboy, actively insults their audience's intelligence with poo poo like "Other Languages are bad because they make English different" or "This VideoGame puzzle is too hard because it puts a baseball diamond or Braile and how can we even figure that out", at this point if any of the actually good writers just made LongRead type things without fragmenting it into baity pieces so that they'd be able to expand instead of being right next to Gladstone and Adam Tod Brown and having to fit their standards of *"""mind blowing""" bullshit*.
Kunster fucked around with this message at 13:39 on Jun 21, 2014 |
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Jun 21, 2014 09:28
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Did CinemaSins do that HORRIBLE "we met Shia Labeouf" video from a while back? Because holy poo poo that was one of the most pathetic, mean-spirited and vile things I've seen on the internet in a while and I remember taking a break from those kind of short-form movie critic videos just cause I felt so disgusted and alienated at that point.
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Jun 21, 2014 13:47
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Ronk a Donk posted:One of the things I like about Cracked is that they don’t take any old poo poo and publish it. They literally pay Adam Tod Brown to express his mildly unpopular opinions in listicle form. That is all Adam Tod Brown does.
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Jun 21, 2014 14:22
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They'll slightly change articles and repost them as "updated versions" for extra hits. They're starting to do "check out these gifs that prove a point" after whining hard about Buzzfeed doing the exact same thing. They started gluing articles together in a huge compilation to the point that whatever title they peg with doesn't make sense for a good part of "points" inside. They pay Winston Crabtree to make schematics that would make Right Wing Political Cartoonists look subtle and almost Golden Recordesque. They've been doing "look at these crazy fan theories about cartoons and videogames that makes them extra AWESOME" poo poo for years.
Kunster fucked around with this message at 14:36 on Jun 21, 2014 |
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Jun 21, 2014 14:29
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So, basically, they've reached the point in every website's lifecycle where the amount of ad-revenue they make doesn't cover the amount of bandwidth they pay for/number of writers they hire and now finances are in the red or hovering nearby and they have no idea how to climb out of the black hole that is "success on the internet"?
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Jun 21, 2014 14:46
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Five Reasons the Ninth Episode of The Secret World of Alex Mack is Pretty Good (That You Wouldn't Expect)
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Jun 21, 2014 15:46
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beep by grandpa posted:Did CinemaSins do that HORRIBLE "we met Shia Labeouf" video from a while back? Because holy poo poo that was one of the most pathetic, mean-spirited and vile things I've seen on the internet in a while and I remember taking a break from those kind of short-form movie critic videos just cause I felt so disgusted and alienated at that point. Elaborate a little?
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Jun 21, 2014 16:00
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BottledBodhisvata posted:Elaborate a little?  Turns out it's Screen Junkies, the honest trailers people. I don't have any opinion of Shia Labeouf either way but shrieking dumb, unfunny insults at a completely passive dude for 5 minutes is a little  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6rDDZioHoM
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Jun 21, 2014 16:06
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beep by grandpa posted:Sure, I was at the laundromat when I wrote that with bad signal so I couldn't look it up at the time BUT HE RAPE MY CHILDHOOD! Honestly anyone that use that phase shouldn't be taken seriously. Cyron fucked around with this message at 16:51 on Jun 21, 2014 |
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Jun 21, 2014 16:43
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Naw, that shtick is more because he plagiarized several people (namely Daniel Clowees) left and right for some art project he did, and he kept jumping left and right to the point of making himself look like this incredibly touched artiste. Basically picture if someone featured on For_Exposure.txt not only found out he was featured there, but managed to successfully twist himself as the true victim of not be able to properly compensate for artwork he took for his project.
Kunster fucked around with this message at 17:02 on Jun 21, 2014 |
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Jun 21, 2014 17:00
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I'd like to recommend Your Movie Sucks https://www.youtube.com/user/YourMovieSucksDOTorg. He's actually a really interesting reviewer who will do huge reviews of pretty varies subjects from a lovely Lifetime movie, M Night's entire career, the second season of Walking Dead and so on. His most interesting works are his best films of the year lists where he takes a bunch of little known movies and gives in depth reasons on why you should check them out. If you're looking for someone in the same realm as Oancitizen, that is a person who goes in depth on film theory, film making and other in depth topics and not just giving a step by step look at the plot then he's for you. I'll warn that he uses some memes sometimes which can be annoying if they are a pet peeve but they never feel overly annoying to me at least, it's usually maybe a reaction face or two. OldTennisCourt fucked around with this message at 17:30 on Jun 21, 2014 |
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Jun 21, 2014 17:11
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beep by grandpa posted:Sure, I was at the laundromat when I wrote that with bad signal so I couldn't look it up at the time Lmao Shia LeBouf owns. He just sits there silently, staring at this twat.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:13
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I'm not a big fan of Cinema Sins either, though I do laugh when I see people say they don't get why other people enjoy it. Really? It's short, snappy, and gives you ammunition for the next time you want to talk about something you think is terrible, or just allows you to laugh along and say "oh boy, that thing I don't like sure sucks!" for a few minutes. As someone said earlier, it's low-effort and low-content, but I'm far from surprised it's popular.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:18
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OldTennisCourt posted:I'd like to recommend Your Movie Sucks https://www.youtube.com/user/YourMovieSucksDOTorg. He's actually a really interesting reviewer who will do huge reviews of pretty varies subjects from a lovely Lifetime movie, M Night's entire career, the second season of Walking Dead and so on. His most interesting works are his best films of the year lists where he takes a bunch of little known movies and gives in depth reasons on why you should check them out. What would you recommend as a good starting point? Just from looking at his channel he does look like he chooses movies other reviewers wouldn't, so I'm already interested.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:19
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BottledBodhisvata posted:Lmao Shia LeBouf owns. He just sits there silently, staring at this twat. It reminds me a lot of the Geoff Keighley/Angry Joe interview. I may not like Geoff much but jesus christ Joe made such an rear end of himself it made me feel for the guy. I'm no fan of Shia and think he's pretty bad 99% of the time but I really feel nothing but contempt for the guy hurling insults. The Vosgian Beast posted:What would you recommend as a good starting point? Just from looking at his channel he does look like he chooses movies other reviewers wouldn't, so I'm already interested. Walking Dead is a good starting point I think.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:21
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The Vosgian Beast posted:What would you recommend as a good starting point? Just from looking at his channel he does look like he chooses movies other reviewers wouldn't, so I'm already interested. Check out his Saw retrospective, it's a good place to get his humor and he actually clearly enjoys discussing all of the series' shortcomings in story, acting and film making while not coming off as dismissive. His M. Night retrospective is another good place to start too. Then check out his years best lists, they have tons of really good films that you might not of heard of and he gives really good reasons why you should check them out.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:29
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I like Seanbaby. Where does he even write now?
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Jun 21, 2014 17:34
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OldTennisCourt posted:Check out his Saw retrospective, it's a good place to get his humor and he actually clearly enjoys discussing all of the series' shortcomings in story, acting and film making while not coming off as dismissive. His M. Night retrospective is another good place to start too. Then check out his years best lists, they have tons of really good films that you might not of heard of and he gives really good reasons why you should check them out. My only problem with his M. Night retrospective is theres a part in his After Earf review where him and a friend go on way, way too long about the physics of someone being blown/sucked out of a space ship, like I think it went on for about 5-8 minutes (or it at least felt that way)
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Jun 21, 2014 17:36
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Tracula posted:My only problem with his M. Night retrospective is theres a part in his After Earf review where him and a friend go on way, way too long about the physics of someone being blown/sucked out of a space ship, like I think it went on for about 5-8 minutes (or it at least felt that way) Yeah, I skipped past a huge chuck of it, it's actually kind of funny at first but it goes on WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too long which I kind of feel like was part of the joke. the After Earth review is still really great at documenting how awful a choice the accents were, especially because Jaden is really not a good actor at all and he's clearly struggling through the whole film.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:38
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Calaveron posted:I like Seanbaby. Where does he even write now? He wrote for Break for a few months at the start of the year, but he hasn't written anything since he released Calculords in February.
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Jun 21, 2014 17:55
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Calaveron posted:I like Seanbaby. Where does he even write now? Retro Magazine , Break.com and wrote a game or two.
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Jun 21, 2014 18:00
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BottledBodhisvata posted:Lmao Shia LeBouf owns. He just sits there silently, staring at this twat. I love the way that video ends, with the guy acting like it's a victory.
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Jun 21, 2014 18:26
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It's an all-goon episode of Cheapskate Live!, as Infamous Sphere drops in to watch a CBC special about art in Canada's far north.
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Jun 21, 2014 22:21
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SFdebris is doing Galaxy Quest on June 24th and we all already know it's the best TNG film  .
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Jun 22, 2014 00:06
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And here's this week's Bad Review, this one dealing with Sonichu Episode 13.
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Jun 22, 2014 01:43
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Kunster posted:Given that Cracked hires John Cheese's EggMan bullshit to write about his daddy issues and alcoholism for the gazillionth time, Winston Crabtree to writes the most platitudal sold-out nerdbait in a way that would shame Michael Ramirez and Mike Lester, jerks off military jingoism in probably the most hypocritical way possible ("O-O-OO-O-O-OOMG DID YOU KNOW THAT A VIDEOGAME YOU CAN PLAY AS CHE GUEVARA EXISTS AND THAT'S MILITARY INDOCRINATIONS ON OUR CHILDREN'S MEDIA??? Btw the IDF runs a totally epic summer camp where your kid can become a badass like Zoltan!"), argued for underpaying creatives, hires Luke McKinney to write the most resentful poo poo against anyone who isn't a total science fanboy, actively insults their audience's intelligence with poo poo like "Other Languages are bad because they make English different" or "This VideoGame puzzle is too hard because it puts a baseball diamond or Braile and how can we even figure that out", at this point if any of the actually good writers just made LongRead type things without fragmenting it into baity pieces so that they'd be able to expand instead of being right next to Gladstone and Adam Tod Brown and having to fit their standards of *"""mind blowing""" bullshit*. I don't love everything Cracked does (namely the bumping of old articles sometimes, and John Cheese's utterly depressing bullshit). But good lord I've seen too many people just rail on everything they do like you just did. I don't really understand this reputation. I go to the site every day. Rarely does anything they produce make me actually angry.
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Jun 22, 2014 01:43
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cubs2084 posted:I don't love everything Cracked does (namely the bumping of old articles sometimes, and John Cheese's utterly depressing bullshit). But good lord I've seen too many people just rail on everything they do like you just did. I don't really understand this reputation. I go to the site every day. Rarely does anything they produce make me actually angry. It's sort of a goony goon goon thing to hate everything ever to be honest. They have some banal clickbait "Top ten reasons X is the most Y of Z media!" but it's hardly ever offensively terrible.
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Jun 22, 2014 01:54
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SatansBestBuddy posted:I can think of no point in any Plinkett review where his voice didn't sound like pure grease being poured down your ear. I know he's an intentionally awful character, but I swear to God my internal monologue is in that drat voice now. 
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Jun 22, 2014 02:25
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Tracula posted:It's sort of a goony goon goon thing to hate everything ever to be honest. They have some banal clickbait "Top ten reasons X is the most Y of Z media!" but it's hardly ever offensively terrible. Fair enough. Though I loved Cracked, they do occasionally offend me on a base level of "God drat you're an idiot". Specifically this one, most recently: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-useless-products-that-nobody-can-throw-out/ His argument against why books are stupid amounts to "We have the internet and e-readers, gently caress your books." While also banally acting like people get passionate about hanging onto copies of Windows 95 For Dummies, or 1950's cook books, or completely worn out cheap paper backs. He is either a complete moron who genuinely can't understand why a copy of a book could have any personal significance to anyone beyond just the words on the paper, or he does and is just trying to stir people up and being an rear end. Either way, it made me genuinely angry and I didn't read the rest of his surely equally condescending article.
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Jun 22, 2014 03:07
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cubs2084 posted:Fair enough. Though I loved Cracked, they do occasionally offend me on a base level of "God drat you're an idiot". Specifically this one, most recently: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-useless-products-that-nobody-can-throw-out/ I just figure that all titles of articles and the opening paragraph are done by someone else at Cracked because they rarely actually tie into the article itself, often contradicting it. The entry for books in that one in particular isn't actually arguing that they are stupid or worthless, just hard to get rid of. And he's 100% right. When we delete books at the library we have to throw them in the dumpster either before or after we close in order to avoid assholes complaining about throwing away perfectly good 1999 encyclopedias of world flute music that no one has ever even opened. We get horrible moldy books that are falling apart and magazines from the 1970s donated to us because people won't just throw poo poo away. Then they get mad when we do. 99.9% of all books should be thrown away or recycled as soon as you're no longer using them, but everyone is convinced that their beat to poo poo and held together with gum copy of The Late Great Planet Earth is as important and valuable as a first printing of Dickens. Edit: Reading through the whole thing, the only one really labeled useless by the author is Better Person Clothes. The other entries are just things that are kept beyond their usefulness due to sentimentality. Gyges fucked around with this message at 03:47 on Jun 22, 2014 |
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Jun 22, 2014 03:42
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Gyges posted:I just figure that all titles of articles and the opening paragraph are done by someone else at Cracked because they rarely actually tie into the article itself, often contradicting it. The entry for books in that one in particular isn't actually arguing that they are stupid or worthless, just hard to get rid of. And he's 100% right. Didn't expect a response from an actual librarian. Well played, sir.
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Jun 22, 2014 04:11
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Tracula posted:It's sort of a goony goon goon thing to hate everything ever to be honest. They have some banal clickbait "Top ten reasons X is the most Y of Z media!" but it's hardly ever offensively terrible. Oh trust me, this isn't me declaring it to be poo poo after I saw a couple things. That's me coming to that conclusion after years of reading that poo poo for years, hoping that there's an actual diamond in the rough! There are times where they jerk over themselves on how the CIA fake vaccination was an amazing, 100% good thing with no reprecautions or how because the Australians didn't wipe the entire Sentinelense population off the map they're "pc pussies". The only thing that's helping them not put more poo poo like that without any sort of editorial "wait, I'm just going to check this a bit better" is only because they're not run by Benny Johnson or Gavin McInnes, so there's at least one head or two going "Ok, maybe posting a gifset on how the Egyptian Revolution is totes like Jurassic Park is a terrible idea". Kunster fucked around with this message at 09:07 on Jun 22, 2014 |
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Jun 22, 2014 08:45
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Gyges posted:I just figure that all titles of articles and the opening paragraph are done by someone else at Cracked because they rarely actually tie into the article itself, often contradicting it. The entry for books in that one in particular isn't actually arguing that they are stupid or worthless, just hard to get rid of. And he's 100% right.
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Jun 22, 2014 10:01
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OldTennisCourt posted:I'd like to recommend Your Movie Sucks https://www.youtube.com/user/YourMovieSucksDOTorg. He's actually a really interesting reviewer who will do huge reviews of pretty varies subjects from a lovely Lifetime movie, M Night's entire career, the second season of Walking Dead and so on. His most interesting works are his best films of the year lists where he takes a bunch of little known movies and gives in depth reasons on why you should check them out. I'll definitely vouch for YMS. He's got a really fun style and loves being goofy. His Amazing Spider Man 2 video is really great and perfectly summarizes why that movie is such total horseshit.
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Jun 22, 2014 10:56
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Kunster posted:Oh trust me, this isn't me declaring it to be poo poo after I saw a couple things. That's me coming to that conclusion after years of reading that poo poo for years, hoping that there's an actual diamond in the rough! There are times where they jerk over themselves on how the CIA fake vaccination was an amazing, 100% good thing with no reprecautions or how because the Australians didn't wipe the entire Sentinelense population off the map they're "pc pussies". The only thing that's helping them not put more poo poo like that without any sort of editorial "wait, I'm just going to check this a bit better" is only because they're not run by Benny Johnson or Gavin McInnes, so there's at least one head or two going "Ok, maybe posting a gifset on how the Egyptian Revolution is totes like Jurassic Park is a terrible idea". drat I hate this thing! Well better read it for years in the hopes of finding a diamond in the rough!
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Jun 22, 2014 12:10
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Xander77 posted:Just get a "give and take" section, and have a little notice that books only get thrown out after spending X time on that shelf by the library entrance. Worked for us. We do have a "give and take section" for recent magazines and paperbacks. Unfortunately we get hundreds of books a day donated and are currently in the process of weeding our non fiction section of things like investment guides circa 2004, 1998 guides to using the internet, and books that haven't been checked out in years and years. Our system does have a few book stores where we sell good condition donations and deleted items of possible use, but that doesn't help get rid of the 1985 set of Britanicas or the books missing covers that you just know that the library can use. And just so I don't seem like a total rear end in a top hat bitching about people trying to help, we do get awesome donations of books on the regular. New very popular items we don't have enough of in the system and old valuable books, for example. A couple years ago we got a first edition of some Ian Fleming book and sold it for a few hundred bucks to a collector. The library is indeed happy to take your used books if they are in good condition and have reuse value. Just please admit to yourself that it's ok to throw away old books because they are items with limited value like any other. Especially your paperback copy of Catcher in the Rye that is literally falling apart and toss in your guide to getting rich in the stock market from 2007 while you're at it.
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Jun 22, 2014 13:53
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Miss Wallace posted:Thanks! Sometimes I think Baywatching is a lot of fun, but then I remember I'm not even into the hilarious seasons yet. I laughed probably more than I should at "HAHAHA THAT'S MY NAME I MUST BE THERE." Must admit, I still make jokes about a character being me, like when Doc Marten said "Infamous Sphere, would you marry me?" and I yelled out a resounding NO at the television. Then again, my name isn't particularly common, so it hasn't really happened enough to wear it out. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe Mitch did you a favour?" "Like the one buddhists did Caeser?" WHAT? Oh, right, Brutus. Once again another amazing Baywatching episode. Does the Australian guy...do anything at all? Is he just there so that people can mention stereotypes in his presence cause that's funny? Please tell me there's a scene where he ominously eats a piece of vegemite toast or SOMETHING.
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Jun 22, 2014 14:10
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Tracula posted:SFdebris is doing Galaxy Quest on June 24th and we all already know it's the best TNG film Hell yes. I was wondering when someone would finally pay him to do this film. I absolutely adore it.
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Jun 22, 2014 15:42
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