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Dead Reckoning
Sep 13, 2011
CVR replaced with one hour of Vladimir Putin making fart noises with his hands and mouth.

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Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009
deep in the bowels of the hague, the un has gathered top men into a room eagerly awaiting the printouts from the black boxes. the teletype spits out a sheet of paper, on it a single sentece:

it was the jews!

Mike-o
Dec 25, 2004

Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed


Grimey Drawer

krispykremessuck
Jul 22, 2005

unlike most veterans and SA members $10 is not a meaningful expenditure for me

I'm gonna have me a swag Bar-B-Q
if anything were to be modified it's likely the voice recorder which I believe captures radio as well, so if the rebels didn't try to warn them off several times or the plane ID'd itself as a civil aircraft and then the rebels fired anyway :shrug:

telemetry wouldn't be that important to modify because crash reconstruction is gonna show that a missile disabled the plane, causing it to crash

ded
Oct 27, 2005

Kooler than Jesus

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?
What is that from?

Edit: Oohhhh, duh.

Godholio fucked around with this message at 03:26 on Jul 22, 2014

ded
Oct 27, 2005

Kooler than Jesus

Godholio posted:

What is that from?

Take a leap.

Mike-o
Dec 25, 2004

Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed


Grimey Drawer
If I was retarded I'd definitely wear that Bullwinkle shirt.

On topic, I thought the first reports were that the Russians snagged the black box and sent it off to Moscow, or was that some bullshit early reporting?

Helldump Immunity.
Aug 2, 2013

Fuck you

ded posted:

Take a leap.

Ziggy always made me chuckle.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

DR. SAM BECKETT NEVER RETURNED HOME

Courthouse
Jul 23, 2013

Mike-o posted:


On topic, I thought the first reports were that the Russians snagged the black box and sent it off to Moscow, or was that some bullshit early reporting?

Either it went over the border for some adjustments and then back, but people here are saying tampering isn't that useful. Or some separatist commander figured that's where they should send it and the Russians yelled at him to stop implicating them further.

E: looks like the remains have been loaded on trains and is getting shipped to the Netherlands.

or is is just Netherlands now? I don't want to offend anyone by erroneously calling their country "the" again :ohdear:

Courthouse fucked around with this message at 11:15 on Jul 22, 2014

Force de Fappe
Nov 7, 2008

Like a dog coming into the kitchen with the bloody tampon it caught in the trash.

Genocide Tendency
Dec 24, 2009

I get mental health care from the medical equivalent of Skillcraft.


Courthouse posted:

Either it went over the border for some adjustments and then back, but people here are saying tampering isn't that useful. Or some separatist commander figured that's where they should send it and the Russians yelled at him to stop implicating them further.

E: looks like the remains have been loaded on trains and is getting shipped to the Netherlands.

or is is just Netherlands now? I don't want to offend anyone by erroneously calling their country "the" again :ohdear:

I still laugh when people in D&D get pissy over poo poo like that. Its way more entertaining to me than it really should be.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

I have no idea why. It's just a refrigerated car of bodies going from The Ukraine to The Netherlands.

Asehujiko
Apr 6, 2011

Courthouse posted:

Either it went over the border for some adjustments and then back, but people here are saying tampering isn't that useful. Or some separatist commander figured that's where they should send it and the Russians yelled at him to stop implicating them further.

E: looks like the remains have been loaded on trains and is getting shipped to the Netherlands.

or is is just Netherlands now? I don't want to offend anyone by erroneously calling their country "the" again :ohdear:
No, "The" is fine. If you want to enrage my countrymen, call them "Holland" instead.

MrYenko
Jun 18, 2012

#2 isn't ALWAYS bad...

Jesus.

You can see the bottom framing of the windscreen and captains window at the top of the fragment. The thing went off in their faces.

:stonk:

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010

Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?
Quick update:

The brits are making GBS threads over the french for still selling a warship to russia, the dutch super-sad about dead folks, the germans are hiding in a closet, pretending they don't exist and the ukrainian parliament had a legit fist fight erupt over some dude ninja-making GBS threads over Ukraine's policies mid-speech.

Larry Parrish
Jul 9, 2012

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Asehujiko posted:

No, "The" is fine. If you want to enrage my countrymen, call them "Holland" instead.

I kept calling it Holland because we were watching the games on Univision and that's what the browns call it, I guess.

psydude
Apr 1, 2008

Heartache is powerful, but democracy is *subtle*.

MrYenko posted:

Jesus.

You can see the bottom framing of the windscreen and captains window at the top of the fragment. The thing went off in their faces.

:stonk:

God drat. Well I guess the pilots were the lucky ones who didn't have to live through that final plunge.

Blotto Skorzany
Nov 7, 2008

He's a PSoC, loose and runnin'
came the whisper from each lip
And he's here to do some business with
the bad ADC on his chip
bad ADC on his chiiiiip

Larry Parrish posted:

I kept calling it Holland because we were watching the games on Univision and that's what the browns call it, I guess.

I believe the proper term is "Hole-land". The dug a hole next to Germany then put up dikes to keep the water out and that's what the low countries are. And the low non-country as well ("Belgium").

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Otto Skorzeny posted:

And the low non-country as well ("Belgium").

That's an archaic name. I think you mean The Maginot Bypass or Expressway to Paris (Aryan Germans Only).

chemosh6969
Jul 3, 2004

code:
cat /dev/null > /etc/professionalism

I am in fact a massive asswagon.
Do not let me touch computer.

Duzzy Funlop posted:

Quick update:

The brits are making GBS threads over the french for still selling a warship to russia, the dutch super-sad about dead folks, the germans are hiding in a closet, pretending they don't exist and the ukrainian parliament had a legit fist fight erupt over some dude ninja-making GBS threads over Ukraine's policies mid-speech.

And in the US, U.S. Vice President Biden says Putin has no soul.
http://news.msn.com/world/us-vice-president-biden-says-putin-has-no-soul-new-yorker

The only people getting anything done are the Russkies.

Genocide Tendency
Dec 24, 2009

I get mental health care from the medical equivalent of Skillcraft.


chemosh6969 posted:

And in the US, U.S. Vice President Biden says Putin has no soul.
http://news.msn.com/world/us-vice-president-biden-says-putin-has-no-soul-new-yorker

The only people getting anything done are the Russkies.

You know what. I like this Putin guy:

quote:

"I said, 'Mr. Prime Minister, I'm looking into your eyes, and I don't think you have a soul,'" Biden told the magazine. "He looked back at me, and he smiled, and he said, 'We understand one another.'"

And speaking of Russkies getting things done. The propaganda machine is turning out this kinda stuff.

chemosh6969
Jul 3, 2004

code:
cat /dev/null > /etc/professionalism

I am in fact a massive asswagon.
Do not let me touch computer.
To be fair though, some of those quotes are from tabloids over there. If we still had Weekly World News, I'm sure other countries would be quoting that stuff too when events happen over here.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

Joe Biden posted:

"We no longer think in Cold War terms, for several reasons," the vice president told the magazine. "One, no one is our equal. No one is close. Other than being crazy enough to press a button, there is nothing that Putin can do militarily to fundamentally alter American interests."

Kinda surprised Joe knows and says this. It's way too logical a thought process for anyone involved int he current administration

Eugene V. Dubstep
Oct 4, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!
Diamond Joe 2016

OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH
Sep 9, 2001
That's the goddamn most reassuring words on national security I've ever heard out of this administration.

Think Joe's gonna run for pres?

Nostalgia4Butts
Jun 1, 2006

WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

President Diamond Joe would be p. much the best thing

This is still the best Diamond Joe story from the onion: http://www.theonion.com/articles/shirtless-biden-washes-trans-am-in-white-house-dri,2718/

OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH
Sep 9, 2001
D&D isn't often funny, but when they are..

AAPsel posted:

Italian news has an interview up with commander of the first rebels on the scene. He was told a military transport plane had been shot down and was sent to deal with those who may have jumped out by parachute. Instead he found a 5 year old girl who had just made a mud angel.

BigDave
Jul 14, 2009

Taste the High Country

PLANES CURE TOWERS posted:

President Diamond Joe would be p. much the best thing

This is still the best Diamond Joe story from the onion: http://www.theonion.com/articles/shirtless-biden-washes-trans-am-in-white-house-dri,2718/



This one is my personal favorite, mostly because I know guys like that.

And Diamond Joe would do better as a sitcom President then a actual President.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

Obama Africanus posted:

That's the goddamn most reassuring words on national security I've ever heard out of this administration.

Think Joe's gonna run for pres?

The way he man-handled Palin in the 08 election debate and shutdown Paul Ryan in an almost existential way in the 12, it wouldn't surprise me if he somehow ended up the next Bill Clinton in that he's a capable enough leader that knows how to play a character to make people feel more at ease with him than they probably should be

Full Battle Rattle
Aug 29, 2009

As long as the times refuse to change, we're going to make a hell of a racket.

Booblord Zagats posted:

The way he man-handled Palin in the 08 election debate and shutdown Paul Ryan in an almost existential way in the 12, it wouldn't surprise me if he somehow ended up the next Bill Clinton in that he's a capable enough leader that knows how to play a character to make people feel more at ease with him than they probably should be

That debate was magical. "Oh, so now you're Jack Kennedy?"


Also love that 'this fuckin' guy' .gif, but I have no idea where to find it.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro
Also, back on the Russian Front

Zeroisanumber
Oct 23, 2010

Nap Ghost

Obama Africanus posted:

That's the goddamn most reassuring words on national security I've ever heard out of this administration.

Think Joe's gonna run for pres?

He's a lock for the nomination if Hillary stumbles. So it's possible, but unlikely, that we'll end up with a Biden nomination.

bloops
Dec 31, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!

PLANES CURE TOWERS posted:

President Diamond Joe would be p. much the best thing

This is still the best Diamond Joe story from the onion: http://www.theonion.com/articles/shirtless-biden-washes-trans-am-in-white-house-dri,2718/

I die every time reading this one. http://www.theonion.com/articles/poll-workers-overhear-biden-repeating-phrase-bange,30266/

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Full Battle Rattle posted:

Also love that 'this fuckin' guy' .gif, but I have no idea where to find it.

?

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


Booblord Zagats posted:

The way he man-handled Palin in the 08 election debate and shutdown Paul Ryan in an almost existential way in the 12, it wouldn't surprise me if he somehow ended up the next Bill Clinton in that he's a capable enough leader that knows how to play a character to make people feel more at ease with him than they probably should be
He might lack tact sometimes but I don't really give a gently caress.

Shortly after he took office he was having meeting with Karzai and brought up corruption, Karzai of course gets all pissy and asks him to name someone who's corrupt. Joe's all "Well you loving brother for starters", that goes around for a little while until Joe has enough and walks out on him.

PookBear
Nov 1, 2008

How long have we been backing Karzai? Even without the threat of the Taliban it would still be a poo poo country.

Flying_Crab
Apr 12, 2002



quote:

Shortly after he took office he was having meeting with Karzai and brought up corruption, Karzai of course gets all pissy and asks him to name someone who's corrupt. Joe's all "Well you loving brother for starters", that goes around for a little while until Joe has enough and walks out on him.

quote:

Karzai assured Biden and the other senators that there was no corruption at all and that, in any case, it was not his fault.

The senators gaped in astonishment. After 45 minutes, Biden threw down his napkin and stood up.

"This dinner is over," Biden announced, according to one of the people in the room at the time. And the three senators walked out, long before the appointed time.

I really want to believe that he said something along the lines of your quote rather than this piece from the NYT.



In other news: http://www.yumasun.com/news/former-marine-facing-child-molestation-charges/article_80a9d25c-1132-11e4-ba09-001a4bcf6878.html?mode=jqm

quote:

A former Yuma Marine who was later a civilian parachute instructor at Yuma Proving Ground has been charged with three felony offenses for allegedly sexually abusing a 12-year-old female.

According to court records, 54-year-old John Joseph Sixta was arrested by Yuma police July 1 and booked into the Yuma County jail, where he remains on a $1 million bond.

A past battalion sergeant major in the U.S. Marine Corps, Sixta's unit was the basis of the seven-episode HBO miniseries "Generation Kill," in which his character had a recurring role.

Guess he'll be policing up those mustaches somewhere else now.

Flying_Crab fucked around with this message at 19:27 on Jul 22, 2014

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OMFG PTSD LOL PBUH
Sep 9, 2001
Mods pls change reks username to Mud Angel.

Because piloting a KC-135 is p. much as high as mud angels fly.

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