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SALT CURES HAM
Jan 4, 2011
I'm going to let it rest for a few days and then try to contact her again and maybe unfuck the situation if at all humanly possible but if not, just give it up and refocus.

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LesterGroans
Jun 9, 2009

It's funny...

You were so scary at night.

CPL593H posted:

You're so lucky that you're not being human trafficked right now.

Don't speak too soon... I'm hoping Mario gets the job done.

SALT CURES HAM
Jan 4, 2011
Mario left to go catch his bus and we exchanged Facebook.

RandallODim
Dec 30, 2010

Another 1? Aww man...

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I'm going to let it rest for a few days and then try to contact her again and maybe unfuck the situation if at all humanly possible but if not, just give it up and refocus.

The way things sound, unfucking this situation and staying with this girl are two separate directions.

CloseFriend
Aug 21, 2002

Un malheur ne vient jamais seul.

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I'm going to let it rest for a few days and then try to contact her again and maybe unfuck the situation if at all humanly possible but if not, just give it up and refocus.
I don't think you're seeing the forest for the trees here. Any ending where you two are together is not a happy ending. See, the thing about when an SO does crazy poo poo like this… is that s/he will do it again. And again. And again. It stops when you stop.

I am CineD's poet laureate of dating lunatics. Trust me.

Kramjacks
Jul 5, 2007

Mario sounds like a better choice than The Warden.

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747

Vermain posted:

(It's actually weirdly appropriate how much Man of Steel's fight scenes look like an episode of DBZ, considering that Goku's backstory is a goofy take on Superman's.)

It's literally Journey to the West and then suddenly he finds out he's Superman when it makes the jump to full fledged battle manga.

Also bitches please don't step about shonen fightin comics I'll cut you.

CloseFriend
Aug 21, 2002

Un malheur ne vient jamais seul.

Literally The Worst posted:

It's literally Journey to the West and then suddenly he finds out he's Superman when it makes the jump to full fledged battle manga.

Also bitches please don't step about shonen fightin comics I'll cut you.
I have to ask… What are your feelings on Fushigi Yuugi? I always liked the character designs, but the writing… Not so much.

Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


No, you should totally try to stay with this girl! Better yet, get her pregnant as soon as possible!

CPL593H
Oct 28, 2009

I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I'm going to let it rest for a few days and then try to contact her again

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lttrIPDFplU

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747

CloseFriend posted:

I have to ask… What are your feelings on Fushigi Yuugi? I always liked the character designs, but the writing… Not so much.

Never read it but it can't be as good as even Zatch Bell wherein the final boss is shot with a dragon made of dragons made of lightning that book is so loving goofy.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

RandallODim posted:

The way things sound, unfucking this situation and staying with this girl are two separate directions.
Yeah, SCH, don't contact her again after this. Not in a few days, not in a few years. Or if you ever do come back into contact with her in your future, I'd keep her at arm's length if I were you.

If I went to a city I was unfamiliar with to stay with a girl who cheated on me and left me locked inside her house while she went out drinking with friends, I wouldn't want to have anything to do with her anymore.

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours

Tars Tarkas posted:

No, you should totally try to stay with this girl! Better yet, get her pregnant as soon as possible!

I wonder if its just immaturity that makes the car crash mindset so appealing.

Criminal Minded
Jan 4, 2005

Spring break forever

Tars Tarkas posted:

No, you should totally try to stay with this girl! Better yet, get her pregnant as soon as possible!

My best friend's boyfriend tried to gently caress with her birth control to knock her up in the hopes of making their relationship stick (which it has anyway so I'm not sure what his big worry was) despite being wildly unqualified to care for another human being let alone a newborn child. The fact that she didn't make him eat poo poo for months for that one (if she insisted on staying together) amazes me.

Criminal Minded
Jan 4, 2005

Spring break forever
Also as somebody who is an absolute and utter glutton for punishment when it comes to relationship-type poo poo (this is me in a nutshell), I'll echo the chorus re: get the gently caress out of there and never talk to this girl again.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

Criminal Minded posted:

My best friend's boyfriend tried to gently caress with her birth control to knock her up in the hopes of making their relationship stick (which it has anyway so I'm not sure what his big worry was) despite being wildly unqualified to care for another human being let alone a newborn child. The fact that she didn't make him eat poo poo for months for that one (if she insisted on staying together) amazes me.
Hahaha wasn't that part of the plot of Lakeview Terrace?

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747
Stay with the girl. Do it. Move in with her right now with whatever you have in your pocket and no job prospects.

FishBulb
Mar 29, 2003

Marge, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich for a moment.

Are you going to eat it?

...yes...
Y'all got some loving problems

Criminal Minded
Jan 4, 2005

Spring break forever

Rageaholic Monkey posted:

Hahaha wasn't that part of the plot of Lakeview Terrace?

Well now you have me reading through the Wiki plot synopsis for that movie, and apparently in that case it was the girl skipping her birth control. Which, everybody has heard those horror stories, but until my friend's incident I'd never heard of the reverse.

Babysitter Super Sleuth
Apr 26, 2012

my posts are as bad the Current Releases review of Gone Girl

Slice of life: I may or may not get to meet Tobe Hooper in a family setting in the intermediate future. The only thing of his I've watched is TCM, and that was almost a decade ago. Please advise.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

Criminal Minded posted:

Well now you have me reading through the Wiki plot synopsis for that movie, and apparently in that case it was the girl skipping her birth control. Which, everybody has heard those horror stories, but until my friend's incident I'd never heard of the reverse.
I haven't even thought about that movie at all in a couple years. Man, while not a great movie, that sure was more entertaining than Neighbors. Samuel L. Jackson and Patrick Wilson fighting each other resulting in a shootout and California burning to the ground.

FishBulb
Mar 29, 2003

Marge, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich for a moment.

Are you going to eat it?

...yes...

mr. stefan posted:

Slice of life: I may or may not get to meet Tobe Hooper in a family setting in the intermediate future. The only thing of his I've watched is TCM, and that was almost a decade ago. Please advise.

Ask him what it was like to watch Speilberg direct Poltergiest.

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747

mr. stefan posted:

Slice of life: I may or may not get to meet Tobe Hooper in a family setting in the intermediate future. The only thing of his I've watched is TCM, and that was almost a decade ago. Please advise.

Ask him how big Batista's dick is.

long-ass nips Diane
Dec 13, 2010

Breathe.

FishBulb posted:

Y'all got some loving problems

SALT CURES HAM
Jan 4, 2011
I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.

Criminal Minded
Jan 4, 2005

Spring break forever

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.

This girl hosed a dude while you were passed out on your birthday

FishBulb
Mar 29, 2003

Marge, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich for a moment.

Are you going to eat it?

...yes...

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.

NO DONT YOU loving DUMB

spaceships
Aug 4, 2005

i love too dumptruck

guacamole aficionado

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.

anyone who responds to you "being clingy" by having a cousin's husband threaten to throttle you is a dumb oval office and you should just get the gently caress out, man. don't be an idiot.

edit: for real. stop posting about this poo poo because it's getting trite, this "relationship" is obviously unhealthy as all get out.

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.

Nah dude I agree. Ignore the haters.

Rageaholic
May 31, 2005

Old Town Road to EGOT

SALT CURES HAM posted:

I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.
Part of me wants you to realize how dumb this all is and put it behind you and turn your life in a positive direction, but another part of me wants to see just how deep this rabbit hole could possibly go :getin:

banned from Starbucks
Jul 18, 2004




SALT CURES HAM posted:

I dunno, this is probably because I'm an idiot but I feel like this is something that can be resolved if we just talk it out. It's a loving insane situation but 99% of my interactions with her have been fantastic and this is literally just a cascading spiral of people making dumb decisions.

listen to about 7 hours worth of old Loveline episodes and imagine you are every caller when they start giving out advice

morestuff
Aug 2, 2008

You can't stop what's coming

Criminal Minded posted:

This girl hosed a dude while you were passed out on your birthday



I worry sometimes that I'm terminally boring, but it has its upshot

SALT CURES HAM
Jan 4, 2011
At least I can introduce myself to people with the fact that my life is basically Trapped in the Closet.

CPL593H
Oct 28, 2009

I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

SALT CURES HAM posted:

At least I can introduce myself to people with the fact that my life is basically Trapped in the Closet.

Remember when I asked how you got locked in a house? I didn't mean "What series of events made this happen", I meant, how the gently caress did you not manage to find your way out of a house?

Geekboy
Aug 21, 2005

Now that's what I call a geekMAN!
As many terrible decisions as I make, you're worrying even me.

I get it. More than I want to admit. But Jesus run for the hills. Run now.

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Just become a hobo for a few months until you reach a city that isn't literally in ruins.

SALT CURES HAM
Jan 4, 2011

CPL593H posted:

Remember when I asked how you got locked in a house? I didn't mean "What series of events made this happen", I meant, how the gently caress did you not manage to find your way out of a house?

Every single exit to the house was barred.

General Ironicus
Aug 21, 2008

Something about this feels kinda hinky
So she had sex with another man then kept you locked in a cage. I think the best thing for you is to read the 50 Shades of Gray series to see what exactly she needs in a relationship, or wait for the upcoming film adaptation.

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours

zVxTeflon posted:

listen to about 7 hours worth of old Loveline episodes and imagine you are every caller when they start giving out advice

Unironically a good idea.

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Vermain
Sep 5, 2006



Everyone please take a vow of celibacy and spend your libidinal efforts striving towards the creation of a new, global communism.

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