bitcoin: a sisyphean nightmare, forever trapped in an endless wall of sperg

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > bitcoin: a sisyphean nightmare, forever trapped in an endless wall of sperg

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infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

ruby idiot railed posted:

Europeans were and are still gigantic pieces of poo poo, vol 32

i think the bigger news is that someone is planing to take africa by storm in much the same manner, using blockchain™

apparently not cognizant of the fact that many africans have had some experience with white people showing up and telling them how to use their land...

# ? Dec 23, 2014 05:19

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 11:37

eschaton: Mar 7, 2007; Don't you just hate when you wind up in a store with people who are in a socioeconomic class that is pretty obviously about two levels lower than your own?

Alan Smithee posted:

All hail heresiarch for his contributions to Big Butts

about this, I cannot lie

# ? Dec 23, 2014 05:46

jony ive aces: Jun 14, 2012; designer of the lomarf car; Buglord

trucutru posted:

Go watch her bitcoin miner video if you have any doubts. NSFW, I guess. I work at the bitmines. (She has gotten a whole $2 dollars, the tipping economy at work!)

http://www.youtubemultiplier.com/5498f7c12f57c-butt-coins.php :nws:

# ? Dec 23, 2014 06:04

jony ive aces: Jun 14, 2012; designer of the lomarf car; Buglord

Heresiarch posted:

somebody did this so i thought i'd log in for a bit

thanks for everybody's kind words, things are very difficult for me at the moment and any support is appreciated

i'm going to log out again now but yospos is public at the moment so i'll keep this thread open in a tab for a while

Mido posted:

stay safe, you rapscallion

# ? Dec 23, 2014 06:05

Hilbert Spaceship: Mar 15, 2007; If I was dyslexic I'd even hate dog too.

Crust First posted:

i'm basically nobody, but i want to let you know i think you're one of the coolest people around here, and i wish you happy holidays and all the best in the new year.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 06:11

Nintendo Kid: Aug 4, 2011; by Smythe

Boxturret posted:

i think that when you solve a block part of your answer is a pay out address so when the block goes through it records all the included transactions plus a 25 coin payout

so if it later got orphaned it never happened like any other transaction

yeah and if you wanted to you could even set the payout address to 1bitcoineater or whatever, preventing new coins from actually being usable. and do the same for the fees

# ? Dec 23, 2014 06:12

vOv: Feb 8, 2014

gonadic io posted:

the Fractal Price universe is like the culture except that rather than having things run by very sensible and benevolent AIs, things are run by AIs that were once human and still fight over petty poo poo and are dicks

# ? Dec 23, 2014 06:49

fermun: Nov 4, 2009

i think that like 6 months back someone noticed that if you didn't want the reward then you don't need to send newly created coins to a dead address. if for some reason you didn't want the block reward to be useable, you could send 0.00000001 bitcoins instead of 25 because the protocol only checks whether the block reward transaction is bigger than the current maximum. it will not allow a reward of 25.00000001 because that's too much right now, but you can send any amount less than that. doing that would reduce the total number of bitcoins that could be created since the time to reward halving is still based on block number not bitcoins created.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 06:51

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

oh cool i'm not too late for the heresiarch well-wishing

i wish you well heresiarch

# ? Dec 23, 2014 07:51

vanilla slimfast: Dec 6, 2006; If anyone needs me, I'll be in the Angry Dome

Alan Smithee posted:

All hail heresiarch for his contributions to Big Butts

eschaton posted:

about this, I cannot lie

he's the sir mix-a-lot of this thread

# ? Dec 23, 2014 08:07

wynott dunn: Aug 9, 2006; What is to be done?

Who or what can challenge, and stand a chance at beating, the corporate juggernauts dominating the world?

Crust First posted:

i'm basically nobody, but i want to let you know i think you're one of the coolest people around here, and i wish you happy holidays and all the best in the new year.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 08:46

Pocket: Aug 27, 2006

hope you get well soon heresiarch

# ? Dec 23, 2014 10:18

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

# ? Dec 23, 2014 10:56

Pocket: Aug 27, 2006

who owns yospos?

# ? Dec 23, 2014 11:03

Soricidus: Oct 21, 2010; freedom-hating statist shill

Pocket posted:

who owns yospos?

mostly we own ourselves

# ? Dec 23, 2014 11:19

NoneMoreNegative: Jul 20, 2000; GOTH FASCISTIC
PAIN MASTER

shit wizard dad

did someone say bu oh I don't care

http://www.wtfbadfantasycovers.com/post/105674027407/ummm

somewhat

# ? Dec 23, 2014 12:12

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

NoneMoreNegative posted:

did someone say bu oh I don't care

http://www.wtfbadfantasycovers.com/post/105674027407/ummm

somewhat

what is the context of this exactly

# ? Dec 23, 2014 12:15

Alliterate Addict: Jul 10, 2012; dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

honestly, the most impressive part of that is that there's at least one more book in the series

# ? Dec 23, 2014 12:49

Weatherman: Jul 30, 2003; WARBLEKLONK

Pocket posted:

who owns yospos?

is not yospos entitled to the sweat of its own butt?

no, says lowtax, it belongs to me. i own yospos.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 13:13

trucutru: Jul 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

fermun posted:

i think that like 6 months back someone noticed that if you didn't want the reward then you don't need to send newly created coins to a dead address. if for some reason you didn't want the block reward to be useable, you could send 0.00000001 bitcoins instead of 25 because the protocol only checks whether the block reward transaction is bigger than the current maximum. it will not allow a reward of 25.00000001 because that's too much right now, but you can send any amount less than that. doing that would reduce the total number of bitcoins that could be created since the time to reward halving is still based on block number not bitcoins created.

But, you see, the prize of bitcoin will go up, Up, UP in the next halving so by the same logic if you destroy that reward you're actually increasing the prize of butts, which can only go up.

Did you know the prize ha gone up at least 10x times over the last 2 years?

# ? Dec 23, 2014 13:28

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK: Sep 11, 2008; Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola
-Cheap Trick; Nap Ghost

Sham bam bamina! posted:

oh cool i'm not too late for the heresiarch well-wishing

i wish you well heresiarch

# ? Dec 23, 2014 14:33

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

Pocket posted:

who owns yospos?

master blaster

# ? Dec 23, 2014 15:11

dont skimp on the shrimp: Apr 23, 2008

Sham bam bamina! posted:

oh cool i'm not too late for the heresiarch well-wishing

i wish you well heresiarch

# ? Dec 23, 2014 15:30

MORE CURLY FRIES: Apr 8, 2004

Just-In-Timeberlake posted:

master blaster

who runs posting town

# ? Dec 23, 2014 15:50

My Linux Rig: Mar 27, 2010; Can't post for 6 years!

Pocket posted:

who owns yospos?

...master blaster...

# ? Dec 23, 2014 16:47

My Linux Rig: Mar 27, 2010; Can't post for 6 years!

Just-In-Timeberlake posted:

master blaster

Gdi

# ? Dec 23, 2014 16:48

sharknado slashfic: Jun 24, 2011

Soricidus posted:

mostly we own ourselves

lol

# ? Dec 23, 2014 16:48

theflyingorc: Jun 28, 2008; ANY GOOD OPINIONS THIS POSTER CLAIMS TO HAVE ARE JUST PROOF THAT BULLYING WORKS; Young Orc

Alan Smithee posted:

what is the context of this exactly

according to "Poppy Z. Brite", it's a major talent

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:12

theflyingorc: Jun 28, 2008; ANY GOOD OPINIONS THIS POSTER CLAIMS TO HAVE ARE JUST PROOF THAT BULLYING WORKS; Young Orc

from the dark book of ...!

quote:

Charlie Shrem�s Poetic and Beautifully Written Sentencing Memo
Charlie Shrem is mythologized for all time as a tragic hero from Greek mythology in, of all places, his sentencing memo.

By Jack Smith IV 12/22 4:24pm

�Sing to me of the CEO, Muse, the entrepreneur of many twists and turns
driven time and again off course, once he had plundered the hallowed heights of Silk Road.�

Charlie Shrem, the plucky Bitcoin evangelist tied to the online black market Silk Road, was sentenced to two years in prison on Friday�charges he plead guilty to in September. So how did he manage to charm the judge into allegedly calling him a �brilliant visionary� and only giving two years behind bars?

Probably it�s that Mr. Shrem isn�t the only one who has a way with words.

Mr. Shrem�s sentencing memo, obtained by Betabeat from the same firm that successfully defended P. Diddy and Dominique Strauss-Kahn, reads like a starry-eyed novella, or at worst a liberal arts major�s graduate thesis. The document casts Mr. Shrem as the hero in an ancient tale�a veritable Prometheus, caught trying to steal fire from the Gods.

The sentencing memo tells a tale as old as recorded history�weaving a literary spell that got Mr. Shrem only two years in jail of a potential 30 year sentence.

From the Introduction:

Had the Greeks known of crypto-currencies and of certain provincial Brooklyn neighborhoods, a tragedy could have been written about a boy who, through Dionysian passion and a little hubris, helped nurture an idea�bitcoin�that was new to the world, and that could change how the world�the whole world�passed value from one person to another.

This new idea would take the boy from from his neighborhood. The boy would see himself as an almost sacred guardian of this new idea, charged with the awesome responsibility of bringing it out of the darkness and into the light of widespread, mainstream acceptance. However, in the chaos of developing the new idea, he would drop his guard, and allow the dark forces to caste it in shadow.

He would be to blame. He would be viewed not as its protector but as its destroyer, the destroyer of the one thing�the idea�he loved most. He would be sent back to his provincial neighborhood and, for a while, would live in his parents� basements, all the while dreaming of the time he could return to his lifelong task of helping�of being just one of many�to bring this new idea further into light.

The rest of the story remains to be written.

The Greeks hardly need to know the tale of Mr. Shrem for it to be mythologized; That tale is in the rest of the memo, which lays out the sunny childhood of the Brooklyn mensch, his early affinity with computers, his love of Bitcoin and its utopian promise, and the eventual folly of getting all mixed up in all that dark web, drug smuggling stuff.

As we reported this morning, the New York Observer and Betabeat have been in touch with Mr. Shrem, who is in good spirits considering we won�t be seeing him but through a glass window for the next couple of years. Since he was sentenced, Mr. Shrem has tweeted how grateful he was that he got off so easy, considering he could have gone away for 30 years given a less sympathetic judge�or a less poetically deft defense attorney.

Mr. Shrem goes with his head held high toward a crime which, since his arrest, he has never once insisted he is totally innocent of. Instead, Mr. Shrem, his attourney and even the judge who handed down his sentence have attributed his crime to the �arrogance of youth.�

As defense attorney Marc Agnifilo cited in his plea to the court, �there is a saying that is attributed to Robert Hanlon but is actually rooted in Goethe which goes: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.�

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:14

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK: Sep 11, 2008; Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola
-Cheap Trick; Nap Ghost

is it irrational to hate anyone who uses a generational title beyond jr.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:40

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

theflyingorc posted:

from the dark book of ...!

i've tried to read this thing like a dozen times but every time i get to "plucky Bitcoin evangelist" i just want death

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:44

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

"my client is an idiot, not an evil mastermind" is a good defense for sentencing here

maybe he should have just gotten a suspended jail sentence with a bunch of probation with the condition that he can't be an officer of any companies or work in financial services or money transmitter businesses

(not that he wouldn't have violated that by shooting his mouth off about bitcoins or something)

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:44

Cantorsdust: Aug 10, 2008; Infinitely many points, but zero length.

ayn rand hand job posted:

is it irrational to hate anyone who uses a generational title beyond jr.

no. they grew up with the same name as their dad and liked it enough to do it to their kid.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:49

theflyingorc: Jun 28, 2008; ANY GOOD OPINIONS THIS POSTER CLAIMS TO HAVE ARE JUST PROOF THAT BULLYING WORKS; Young Orc

hobbesmaster posted:

"my client is an idiot, not an evil mastermind" is a good defense for sentencing here

any time shrem speaks in the future we should remind him that his own lawyer told the court that he is stupid

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:50

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

they should get the same lawyer for ulbritch, have him equate hiring multiple assassins to odysseus's blinding the cyclops or something

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:56

theflyingorc: Jun 28, 2008; ANY GOOD OPINIONS THIS POSTER CLAIMS TO HAVE ARE JUST PROOF THAT BULLYING WORKS; Young Orc

Boxturret posted:

they should get the same lawyer for ulbritch, have him equate hiring multiple assassins to odysseus's blinding the cyclops or something

"Who has hacked you, Polyphemous?"

"Anonymous! Anonymous has hacked me!"

"If you don't know who hacked you, quiet down!"

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:59

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

i like to imagine that the filed court papers have a header and footer with "WHAT MY CLIENT REALLY BELIEVES" in red large point font

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:59

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

it's genuinely terrifying to me that a federal judge read that and came away thinking its author was "brilliant"

# ? Dec 23, 2014 18:00

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

they quoted it out of context so who knows

# ? Dec 23, 2014 18:13

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 11:37

Soricidus: Oct 21, 2010; freedom-hating statist shill

theflyingorc posted:

"Who has hacked you, Polyphemous?"

"Anonymous! Anonymous has hacked me!"

"If you don't know who hacked you, quiet down!"

# ? Dec 23, 2014 18:18

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > bitcoin: a sisyphean nightmare, forever trapped in an endless wall of sperg

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