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Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007

i like wizards

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Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007
I have nothing to say about ur-stories and whether everything is derivative or not, but what do people think about using this thread for :toxx:es on personal projects? I'm working on stuff, but not at the pace I'd like. So, for example, lets say I want to finish a first draft of a story by February 20th. If I can't show someone a google doc of the draft by that date, I'm banned. Do you guys think the pace of this thread would be conducive to people helping each other meet personal deadlines? I'm hesitant to make it it's own thread because historically those kind of dry up after a week or two. Toxxes work well in Thunderdome as motivation, so maybe it would be helpful for those of us who need a little extra incentive to do more than 200-500 words a week.

Just thought I'd run it by you guys before asking Humboldt if it's ok.

Bobby Deluxe
May 9, 2004

Screaming Idiot posted:

I could write a story about a man who masturbates into a volcano and summons a non-Euclidean astrocube that sings in colors.
if you aren't using this can i have it

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013


it's crow time again

Sitting Here posted:

i like wizards

pizza wizards

now i'm hungry

POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug
Maybe a separate thread for project toxxes, Sitting Here? I'd be in for something like that. I finished the first rough draft of my novel, and now it's languishing while I gently caress off doing other poo poo. I need to get back on that train.

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003
Just toxx yourself in here. Set the parameters yourself. Do it!

painted bird
Oct 18, 2013

by Lowtax
I'd be interested in a general thread for project toxxes. Or doing it here. Either way, it sounds like a good idea.

NyxBiker
Sep 24, 2014

chthonic bell posted:

I'd be interested in a general thread for project toxxes. Or doing it here. Either way, it sounds like a good idea.

I'd be interested too. Though a new thread would be better in my opinion, especially because it makes more order and you don't mix it with other stuff.

Baby Babbeh
Aug 2, 2005

It's hard to soar with the eagles when you work with Turkeys!!



I say keep it in one thread. It's not like it's going to generate such a massive amount of traffic that a separate thread is necessary, and more people check this thread so there will be more accountability.

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007
Yeah, there've been separate goal threads before and they just die after the first page, like I said. I think it's better to have personal goals happen in the same place as general discussion. There's more of a sense of accountability with more people watching.

painted bird
Oct 18, 2013

by Lowtax
EDIT: never mind! Looks like it's not gonna be an issue.

painted bird fucked around with this message at 22:10 on Jan 26, 2015

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.
I'm also in favor of a separate thread for personal toxxes. I might even join myself once I can be sure I can commit myself.

It'd be like a one-person Thunderdome. "ONE PERSON ENTERS! NOBODY LEAVES!" :black101:

Bobby Deluxe posted:

if you aren't using this can i have it

okay but it is not an ur-story so it will not be good :ohdear:

Benny the Snake
Apr 11, 2012

GUM CHEWING INTENSIFIES
Um, is it cool if I ask what everybody thought of my TD story for this week? :ohdear:

EDIT:excluding the judges, of course.

crabrock
Aug 2, 2002

I

AM

MAGNIFICENT






it sucked.

whoops.

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003

Benny the Snake posted:

Um, is it cool if I ask what everybody thought of my TD story for this week? :ohdear:

EDIT:excluding the judges, of course.

It's not kosher to give TD feedback before judgement is in. After that it's fine.

Benny the Snake
Apr 11, 2012

GUM CHEWING INTENSIFIES

newtestleper posted:

It's not kosher to give TD feedback before judgement is in. After that it's fine.
Okay. I'll keep that in mind from now on

Liam Emsa
Aug 21, 2014

Oh, god. I think I'm falling.
So are we making a new thread or what?

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007
I'm going to go ahead and just use this thread for my purposes for now. If FA suddenly gets too cluttered and high traffic because of toxxes, we can open a new thread. But with CC being a relatively slow forum, I think it's best that we consolidate our effort and mutual support in one discussion area.

SO. I have this short fantasy story I'm working on inspired by the general feel of stories published by Beneath Ceaseless Skies. I'm :toxx:ing myself to have the first draft done by February 28th.

So, uh, there.

painted bird
Oct 18, 2013

by Lowtax
Can I toxx myself even though I'm working on a comic and not prose? Or should I take that to the comic making thread. :v:

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.
It might be more appropriate to use the comic-making thread, but you'll probably get more encouragement/unconcealed loathing from the fine misanthropes here.

Sitting Here posted:

I'm going to go ahead and just use this thread for my purposes for now. If FA suddenly gets too cluttered and high traffic because of toxxes, we can open a new thread. But with CC being a relatively slow forum, I think it's best that we consolidate our effort and mutual support in one discussion area.

SO. I have this short fantasy story I'm working on inspired by the general feel of stories published by Beneath Ceaseless Skies. I'm :toxx:ing myself to have the first draft done by February 28th.

So, uh, there.

Hey, shoot me a copy when you're done. You do solid work and I wanna be among the first to cheer you on! And offer honest critique!

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003

chthonic bell posted:

Can I toxx myself even though I'm working on a comic and not prose? Or should I take that to the comic making thread. :v:

As Captain Planet would say "the power is yours!"

I come to this thread for writey chitchat, not drawy chitchat, though.

flerp
Feb 25, 2014

Benny the Snake posted:

Um, is it cool if I ask what everybody thought of my TD story for this week? :ohdear:

EDIT:excluding the judges, of course.

hey im working on a line by line crit for you since you wanted a crit, but I expect you to pay it forward by critting someone else's. It doesn't have to be a line by line, but I will look down upon you if it isn't. If your not ok with having the person with the most DM not thinking highly of you, I suggest you put effort in that crit.

Also, don't crit one of mine because I haven't been writing lately and probably won't for awhile. Do someone who is actually writing and needs some feedback.

flerp fucked around with this message at 10:22 on Jan 27, 2015

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007

Screaming Idiot posted:

It might be more appropriate to use the comic-making thread, but you'll probably get more encouragement/unconcealed loathing from the fine misanthropes here.


Hey, shoot me a copy when you're done. You do solid work and I wanna be among the first to cheer you on! And offer honest critique!

I appreciate that! I'll keep you in mind for a month from now. I hope.

painted bird
Oct 18, 2013

by Lowtax
After a lot of angsting about whether I want to do visual art or writing, I've decided to stop waffling and do writing and also toxx myself.

I have a novel in the works. I've written no actual words of it. The goal wordcount is 100k (it's fantasy). I'm :toxx:ing myself to have the first draft done by March 31.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Sitting Here posted:

I appreciate that! I'll keep you in mind for a month from now. I hope.

Don't worry, 'cuz I'mma bug you about it. You're one of the best writers we have here and if I can do something to encourage you guys to get your talents out to the world, I'll have done something good.

That's something everyone here needs to remember, by the way. Honest criticism is great, but sometimes a little (deserved!) praise and encouragement helps.

POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug
I'm toxxing myself to have the second draft of this 102k mess done by March 31st as well. A normal person should be able to edit in that time, right? Ugh, this means I've got two :toxx: threads.

Not sure how to make it easy for someone to verify that I'm not a shitlord. Should I just put a link to a gdoc with the original rough?

Benny the Snake
Apr 11, 2012

GUM CHEWING INTENSIFIES

Broenheim posted:

hey im working on a line by line crit for you since you wanted a crit, but I expect you to pay it forward by critting someone else's. It doesn't have to be a line by line, but I will look down upon you if it isn't. If your not ok with having the person with the most DM not thinking highly of you, I suggest you put effort in that crit.

Also, don't crit one of mine because I haven't been writing lately and probably won't for awhile. Do someone who is actually writing and needs some feedback.
Of course. Post in on the 'dome, please? I'll post there if anybody wants a crit. Thanks, Bro :tipshat:

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi
Mar 26, 2005

chthonic bell posted:

After a lot of angsting about whether I want to do visual art or writing, I've decided to stop waffling and do writing and also toxx myself.

I have a novel in the works. I've written no actual words of it. The goal wordcount is 100k (it's fantasy). I'm :toxx:ing myself to have the first draft done by March 31.

100k words in two months is a big ask, but it's definitely doable. Just don't get hung up on the fact that it's going to likely be terrible. The first first draft I ever completed was a highly derivative space opera that clocked in at 200k words and took about 4 and a half months. It was god-loving-awful and will never see the light of day, but the main reward was the sense of accomplishment and the lessons I was able to take into my following projects, which were both shorter and better written.

Good luck and don't give up!

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi fucked around with this message at 17:38 on Jan 28, 2015

painted bird
Oct 18, 2013

by Lowtax
Yeah, I know it'll probably be trash. :v: The goal is to get it done so I stop waffling and stalling.

I have a question: if I'm writing fantasy, how much of a turn-off would the use of nonstandard (i.e. made up fantasy) pronouns be? There's a culture that figures significantly that uses neutral pronouns for their children and I was wondering if I should go all-out with that and use the neutral pronoun in narration or not.

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013


it's crow time again

Pronouns are part of operator words (probably not the right name) that the human brain doesn't accept new entries into. For instance, The Left Hand Of Darkness features gender-neutral aliens, and also bits of alien vocab, but only tells us about the alien pronouns. Even when presenting translated works from the aliens' culture, the author uses English pronouns.

I'd say point it out, but if you use it in text keep its use sparing and only in dialogue. I personally wouldn't try to use it at all, but that's up to you. I think it'd be enough to have a character mention it from time to time (when it's relevant to plot or characterization) rather than trying to beat the reader's brain into accepting a word that doesn't fit.

Bobby Deluxe
May 9, 2004

chthonic bell posted:

I have a question: if I'm writing fantasy, how much of a turn-off would the use of nonstandard (i.e. made up fantasy) pronouns be? There's a culture that figures significantly that uses neutral pronouns for their children and I was wondering if I should go all-out with that and use the neutral pronoun in narration or not.
I'd agree with the above post, reference that it exists but don't use it in the normal flow of the text.

Singular they is a good choice if you want to use it, although be prepared for the occasional reader to query the singular / plural divide. Ultimately a short research blast seems to indicate that as long as you define who you're talking about at the beginning of the paragraph, singular they is fine:

quote:

Who the gently caress calls a kid Leslie? Are they male or female?

quote:

Anyone here could be the murderer. We have no idea who they are.

quote:

I can't wait to meet them.


It fell out of use over the last two centuries, but it's made a strong return. Just don't go all second-wave and start peppering the text with "zhe," "hir" or "s/he" because it breaks the flow of the text for the reasons in the above post.

painted bird
Oct 18, 2013

by Lowtax
I've thought about using singular they and that does appeal, but I think I'll stick with binary pronouns after all, even though I'm a little disappointed.

The bigger problem is the character who comes to realise they're uncomfortable with both male and female pronouns, but they don't turn up until later in the series, so I'll deal with them later.

neongrey
Feb 28, 2007

Plaguing your posts with incidental music.
Kameron Hurley's The Mirror Empire uses a third pronoun set and multiple genders; it's not that intrusive using it sparingly. It does stick out, but if a point of the character is that they realize it won't work to use others, then, well, yeah part of the point would be sticking out. I don't necessarily love it but it's an in-print example of someone doing exactly what you want.

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013


it's crow time again

Corrollary if you do want to use the pronoun: say it once, have someone point out that it's a pronoun translates to that kid, and from then on just say that kid. The problem that hits me when using a constructed pronoun is that it always feels like a nickname instead of a pronoun.

General Battuta
Feb 7, 2011

This is how you communicate with a fellow intelligence: you hurt it, you keep on hurting it, until you can distinguish the posts from the screams.

neongrey posted:

Kameron Hurley's The Mirror Empire uses a third pronoun set and multiple genders; it's not that intrusive using it sparingly. It does stick out, but if a point of the character is that they realize it won't work to use others, then, well, yeah part of the point would be sticking out. I don't necessarily love it but it's an in-print example of someone doing exactly what you want.

This is what I was going to point to. It uses a pretty wide array of nonstandard pronouns, it was well-reviewed and it made good money.

neongrey
Feb 28, 2007

Plaguing your posts with incidental music.
Oh, of course you would, mister 'has her blurb on my book' :v:

(seriously I would not stop squealing like a little girl after seeing that if I were you, I really enjoy her stuff)

General Battuta
Feb 7, 2011

This is how you communicate with a fellow intelligence: you hurt it, you keep on hurting it, until you can distinguish the posts from the screams.
Haha, fair! She's pretty gutsy. I haven't read Mirror Empire yet but:

quote:

In Kameron Hurley’s epic fantasy, the three plot-central countries each have a different gender system: five genders in Dhai, three genders in Saiduan, two genders in Dorinah.

...

Early in the book, we learn that there are five genders in Dhai—female-assertive, female-passive, male-assertive, male-passive, and ungendered.

I would've expected readers to really trip up on this, but apparently she pulled it off. When I hear critique of the book it's not usually about the gender systems or how they intrude into the narrative.

neongrey
Feb 28, 2007

Plaguing your posts with incidental music.
My only real objection is that the scenes where the systems are detailed detailed are very... exposition-y, but outside those specific scenes it works fairly well, yeah. The book's a good read.

Benny the Snake
Apr 11, 2012

GUM CHEWING INTENSIFIES
So among my many, many flaws, I've noticed that I have a bad habit of over-doing facts and exposition to the point where I look like I obviously don't know what I'm talking about. Any tips on how to mitigate that?

Also I've been told my action is really good. What exactly is it, though? Is it that my action scenes are dynamic or...?

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POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug
Generally when people say an action scene is good, I think it means that they can actually follow what's happening (more or less). They're able to imagine it. Less about dynamics, more about clarity. That's strictly anecdotal, since I'm not psychic, and comes from my own experiences in giving/receiving critique on action scenes.

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