Anti-Food Porn Thread: Seems Saggy Not Saggy A Bit Saggy Ball

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Nine of Eight: Apr 28, 2011; LICK IT OFF, AND PUT IT BACK IN; Dinosaur Gum

Cute as heck posted:

Is that the leaf I used to wipe my rear end while camping? Nope! Just pasteles.

and oh my god they're so good

I'm pretty sure that's a Tamale??

# ? Sep 19, 2015 05:23

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# ? Apr 20, 2024 00:58

PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Nine of Eight posted:

I'm pretty sure that's a Tamale??

Same concept, different ingredients

# ? Sep 19, 2015 05:27

rndmnmbr: Jul 3, 2012

Roro posted:

Melted string cheese. That's it.

Oh... oh holy poo poo, I know what my next trip report shall be.

The Chupaqueso

It's a food item invented by a webcomic artist. It's perfect for this thread.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 08:11

AnonSpore: Jan 19, 2012; "I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

rndmnmbr posted:

Oh... oh holy poo poo, I know what my next trip report shall be.

The Chupaqueso

It's a food item invented by a webcomic artist. It's perfect for this thread.

The Chupaqueso posted:

You now have a cheese shell sizzling in a puddle of cheese grease. It's still flexible, but much longer and it won't be

# ? Sep 19, 2015 08:32

Mexican Deathgasm: Aug 17, 2010; Ramrod XTreme

That YouTube video made me want to try making pepper jam, just not with Mountain Dew.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 08:48

NLJP: Aug 26, 2004

rndmnmbr posted:

Oh... oh holy poo poo, I know what my next trip report shall be.

The Chupaqueso

It's a food item invented by a webcomic artist. It's perfect for this thread.

That reminds me of the bit at the end of a fondue when you leave the last bits of cheese to crisp up under the last layer of still molten cheese. It needs some tending so as not to burn but when you get it right it's pretty great.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 09:23

RareAcumen: Dec 28, 2012

Grilled Dorito and Black Bean Chicken Burger and Grilled Dorito-Crusted Salsa Chicken Burger :stonk:

quote:

Spread butter on hard roll.
Pile on Doritos.
Cut in half and eat it.

*shudder* Dorito based cooking.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 12:44

PubicMice: Feb 14, 2012; looking for information on posts

# ? Sep 19, 2015 15:53

Philippe: Aug 9, 2013; (she/her)

PubicMice posted:

This just seems poorly plated, really. Some nice meat and roasted veggies, nothing wrong with that.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:03

RareAcumen: Dec 28, 2012

how do you make waffles so pale

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:12

Philippe: Aug 9, 2013; (she/her)

I think they're just potato mash pressed into a shape.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:19

Silver Alicorn: Mar 30, 2008; 𝓪 𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮

They're par-baked frozen waffles, untoasted.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:24

Haverchuck: May 6, 2005; the coolest

PubicMice posted:

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:26

RareAcumen: Dec 28, 2012

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

I think they're just potato mash pressed into a shape.

That sounds supremely unappetizing. Good work.

Speaking of food abominations

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JPMz60OBTk

Golden Goat posted:

How 2 cook Ramen Lasagna:
1. Shove cheesestrings, hard ramen cup noodles & ragu sauce into a Chinese take away dish that you may or may not have washed.
2. Somehow turn that into a 12 minute video.
3. Regret eating your horrible noddle goop.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:27

empty sea: Jul 17, 2011; gonna saddle my seahorse and float out to the sunset

PubicMice posted:

Here we go. Perfect example because the dressing on that salad would run and mix with whatever that pasta? dish is? Looks sort of like a hamburger helper thing. Anyway, no, I would not want my salad dressing or bits of salad mixing with that crap or vice versa. Salty, meaty imitation dinner that came from a packet should not mix with my salad unless I had no dressing, I guess. But what kind of freak eats plain salad

On the other hand, mashed potatoes are a perfect vehicle for loose corn or loose pea control because the flavors mesh deliciously.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:27

Roro: Oct 9, 2012; HOO'S HEAD GOES ALL THE WAY AROUND?

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

I think they're just potato mash pressed into a shape.

Yeah, those are potato waffles that have been sorely undercooked. They're supposed to be a golden colour when cooked.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:36

Philippe: Aug 9, 2013; (she/her)

empty sea posted:

On the other hand, mashed potatoes are a perfect vehicle for loose corn or loose pea control because the flavors mesh deliciously.

Also, it's a lot easier to eat mash with peas in it than the two items separated. Thirdly, you feel more healthy since you're ingesting vegetables as well, and not just a fuckload of mash with your meat of choice (I prefer homemade meatballs).

Damnit, now I'm hungry. Let's have some more failure:

# ? Sep 19, 2015 16:48

Minarchist: Mar 5, 2009; by WE B Bourgeois

PubicMice posted:

I'm not sure Moscato pairs well with sour cream and onion :ohdear:

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:05

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Minarchist posted:

I'm not sure Moscato pairs well with sour cream and onion

If you're catering your party with things from Rite-Aid, you take what you can get.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:13

Marius Pontmercy: Apr 2, 2007; Liberte
Egalite
Beyonce

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

Damnit, now I'm hungry. Let's have some more failure:

Would; Would; Would if sufficiently drunk; Just a poor-mans KFC bowl, but probably would not.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:25

Railing Kill: Nov 14, 2008; You are the first crack in the sheer face of god. From you it will spread.

Minarchist posted:

I'm not sure Moscato pairs well with sour cream and onion

Hey, you're just lucky it's not saltine crackers and string cheese.

But that image reminds me of what my wife calls boxed wine: car d'bordeaux.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:30

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

Are those chicken nuggets? Because would. More for me.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:33

Minarchist: Mar 5, 2009; by WE B Bourgeois

Breakfast skillet w/ extra oil :barf:

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:49

SymmetryrtemmyS: Jul 13, 2013; I got super tired of seeing your avatar throwing those fuckin' glasses around in the astrology thread so I fixed it to a .jpg

Minarchist posted:

Breakfast skillet w/ extra oil

Holy poo poo that first one god drat

Did they boil cheese to make it split, or did they just add about a cup of oil?

# ? Sep 19, 2015 18:55

SulfurMonoxideCute: Feb 9, 2008; I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

RareAcumen posted:

Grilled Dorito and Black Bean Chicken Burger and Grilled Dorito-Crusted Salsa Chicken Burger

*shudder* Dorito based cooking.

We've made taco salad with doritos instead of nachos as a drunk food before, it's actually terrible yet good. Like "This is so salty my heart hurts but the flavours go well"

# ? Sep 19, 2015 19:01

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Minarchist posted:

Breakfast skillet w/ extra oil

i got a tabletop grill for twenty bucks new once

like come on

# ? Sep 19, 2015 19:01

SulfurMonoxideCute: Feb 9, 2008; I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Brawnfire posted:

i got a tabletop grill for twenty bucks new once

like come on

But they're life hacking.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 19:02

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Picnic Princess posted:

But they're life hacking.

They need to work bread-bag clips in there somehow

# ? Sep 19, 2015 19:07

13Pandora13: Nov 5, 2008; I've got tiiits that swingle dangle dingle

Nine of Eight posted:

I'm pretty sure that's a Tamale??

Negatory. Plantain base versus corn base, son.

# ? Sep 19, 2015 19:19

RareAcumen: Dec 28, 2012

Minarchist posted:

I'm the solitary croc on the floor.

# ? Sep 20, 2015 01:28

Data Graham: Dec 28, 2009; 📈📊🍪😋

What is wrong with you, Cheetos are not Doritos.

# ? Sep 20, 2015 03:48

AlbieQuirky: Oct 9, 2012; Just me and my 🌊dragon🐉 hanging out

I've had vegan sloppy joes before, and they were good. The ones in the photo above look less good, but not inedible.

The most successful faux meats in my opinion are crumbles and sausage.

# ? Sep 20, 2015 03:52

RareAcumen: Dec 28, 2012

AlbieQuirky posted:

I've had vegan sloppy joes before, and they were good. The ones in the photo above look less good, but not inedible.

I put that one there mostly because of how :effort:

it all was.

cook meat
put sauce on meat
put meat on bread
put pickles on sandwich
~~eat it off the floor like an animal you piece of poo poo~~

# ? Sep 20, 2015 04:36

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

cash crab posted:

What the gently caress kind of Addams Family burrito is that

I had one of those rare moments where a post on the internet actually made me burst out laughing and woke my roommate up, as opposed to lying about it

# ? Sep 20, 2015 06:20

big dyke energy: Jul 29, 2006; Football? Yaaaay

PubicMice posted:

Ah, I see my mom's having another party.

# ? Sep 20, 2015 06:51

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

AlbieQuirky posted:

I've had vegan sloppy joes before, and they were good. The ones in the photo above look less good, but not inedible.

The most successful faux meats in my opinion are crumbles and sausage.

I have a weird soft spot for vegetarian burgers which goes against most of my horribly lame internet-Ron-Swanson-style love of meat

# ? Sep 20, 2015 07:19

serious norman: Dec 13, 2007; im pickle rick!!!!

PubicMice posted:

This looks good to me, unironically would eat/drink the poo poo out of it.

# ? Sep 20, 2015 10:20

pienipple: Mar 20, 2009; That's wrong!

Aesop Poprock posted:

I have a weird soft spot for vegetarian burgers which goes against most of my horribly lame internet-Ron-Swanson-style love of meat

Veggie burgers are pretty tasty when they're not trying to fool you into thinking they're meat. It's okay to be a spiced bean patty, just don't be an unpleasant slab of tvp like Boca.

# ? Sep 20, 2015 10:29