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Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"

Evfedu posted:

That Canadian Fighter pilot one makes me laugh so goddamn hard

Are there any more like it? I swear I've seen others posted in old quote threads, but it might've just been the F-35 one.

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Mans
Sep 14, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
I swear there's an entire saga of the F-35 operating in Somalia and being shot down by Somali pirates in air balloons.

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006

Poor ol' F-35, thought of ants and crashed.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Greatbacon posted:

There are also extensions that turn "millennials" into "snake-people", "SJWs" into "skeletons", and one that replaces YouTube comments with quotes from Nietzsche.

Truly ours is the best of all possible worlds.

That last seems redundant. If you're reading YouTube comments you've already gazed into the abyss.

White Light
Dec 19, 2012

Neddy Seagoon posted:

Are there any more like it? I swear I've seen others posted in old quote threads, but it might've just been the F-35 one.

I hope that guy writes comedy for a living, I just about died laughing once I got to the OnStar bit.

Who the hell even remembers that tidbit? It's the little things

Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat

Lonos Oboe posted:

This is my from the hip take on the Vader dick discussion: I think he has no balls but has a mighty dick. He has the power, but lacks the will and drive needed to do anything with it and gets no enjoyment. i am sure that in a specific irony his dick is totally unmarked except for maybe a single scar. (I have scoured wookieepedia for proof, but an artist on the Clone Wars cartoon series' DA page backs me up on this.) He likely installed a prostate massager into his meditation suite. Which is symbolic of the Emperor's control over him. Luke and Leia are his symbolic balls that he needs to have the power to conquer the galaxy and bring balance to the force. Once he has his children acting as his symbolic balls, only then will balance be brought.

The twin death stars belonging to the Emperor were built at the same time and either suggest the Emperor is not swinging a full bag or that he just really likes dudes balls. But now is neither the time nor the place for such speculation. An interesting sidebar is the fleet's collection of gigantic Star Destroyers with tiny balls on their bridge. Again signifying the power but lack of conviction.

As for the rebels.... well, I don't need to state the obvious do I?

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008


what is a poet? all balls no cock

Josef bugman
Nov 17, 2011

Pictured: Poster prepares to celebrate Holy Communion (probablY)

This avatar made possible by a gift from the Religionthread Posters Relief Fund

Aphrodite posted:

Poor ol' F-35, thought of ants and crashed.

The quotes are coming from inside the thread!

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



What is F-35 a reference to?

foobardog
Apr 19, 2007

There, now I can tell when you're posting.

-- A friend :)

Dr. Gitmo Moneyson posted:

What is F-35 a reference to?

The F-35 is a jet that they're trying to replace the current American fleet of jets with, and has been a complete and utter boondoggle costing poo poo tons of money for a terrible product that most actual people in the military don't even want.

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

it's a bad plane

as can in fact be entirely grasped from context you chimp

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



I thought it was GBS 1.0 code for the "fag"-word or something.

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

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Hell 35 fags sounds like a fun party to me

Son of Thunderbeast
Sep 21, 2002

Dr. Gitmo Moneyson posted:

I thought it was GBS 1.0 code for the "fag"-word or something.

yes this makes much more sense than the alternative

Hemingway To Go!
Nov 10, 2008

im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i'll always Respect my enemys.
- ernest hemingway

Mans posted:

I swear there's an entire saga of the thirty five fags operating in Somalia and being shot down by Somali pirates in air balloons.

????

Son of Thunderbeast
Sep 21, 2002
I mean, to be fair, we don't have any evidence that other pilots don't call F-35 pilots "fags"

Machai
Feb 21, 2013

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

I mean, to be fair, we don't have any evidence that other pilots don't call F-35 pilots "fags"

don't ask, don't tell

Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"

foobardog posted:

The F-35 is a jet that they're trying to replace the current American fleet of jets with, and has been a complete and utter boondoggle costing poo poo tons of money for a terrible product that most actual people in the military don't even want.

Especially when its outclassed by planes that are nearly 20 years old, iirc.

princecoo
Sep 3, 2009

Neddy Seagoon posted:

Especially when its outclassed by planes that are nearly 20 years old, iirc.

And my glorious country of Australia spent $12 Billion USD on the loving things despite everyone saying they were absolute poo poo, including the dudes trying to sell them to us. :australia:

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

I mean, to be fair, we don't have any evidence that other pilots don't call F-35 pilots "fags"

Yeah but that's only because they're usually on fire, have a high mortality rate, and have trouble starting up when there's wind.

Fender Anarchist
May 20, 2009

Fender Anarchist

Aphrodite posted:

Yeah but that's only because they're usually on fire, have a high mortality rate, and have trouble starting up when there's wind.

Counterpoint: good luck ever having 20 intact ones in one place.

flavor.flv
Apr 18, 2008

I got a letter from the government the other day
opened it, read it
it said they was bitches




princecoo posted:

And my glorious country of Australia spent $12 Billion USD on the loving things despite everyone saying they were absolute poo poo, including the dudes trying to sell them to us. :australia:

The sooner you realise that commonwealth countries only exist to buy things from America, the better off you'll be.

Just look at Canada, they haven't produced any of their own culture in decades and they're happy as clams.

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

RandomFerret posted:

The sooner you realise that commonwealth countries only exist to buy things from America, the better off you'll be.

Just look at Canada, they haven't produced any of their own culture in decades and they're happy as clams.

They own most of the regional. Air jet of the us. Embrair or something I fly weekly.

And Justin believer

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



On the topic of Hemingway

Earwicker posted:

maybe someone needs to do one of those The Sun Also Rises And Zombies mashups.

Mel Mudkiper posted:

A moveable feast

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



Aphrodite posted:

Yeah but that's only because they're usually on fire, have a high mortality rate, and have trouble starting up when there's wind.

Interesting fact: F-35s, like fags, are often flaming.

Tiberius Thyben
Feb 7, 2013

Gone Phishing


RandomFerret posted:

Just look at Canada, they haven't produced any of their own culture in decades and they're happy as clams.

America doesn't have a culture, though.

Kaiju15
Jul 25, 2013

Wild T posted:

Now since we're on the topic of that deployment, there was a healthy helping of AUG to go with the pizza. There I worked with Hall, who was hands-down the grossest motherfucker I've ever met. I was first introduced to him in some pre-deployment training we all went through in Kansas. He was an Air Force E-4 who was planning to punch as soon as he got home and return to his hometown in West Virginia. I'm pretty sure he was at least mildly autistic, actually, because he was a computer genius but utterly inept at anything else while being totally unaware that he sucked at an activity. He walked like a giant toddler; toes pointed towards each other, arms limp at his side and swaying with each step. He'd brag in his strange, lispy voice about how good of a shot he was from hunting back home, then broke down in tears at the rifle range because he failed the course 6+ times in a row and the instructors eventually shot his targets for him so they could go home. He didn't know how to shower properly and would walk into the shower, stand under the water for 2-3 minutes without actually washing then get out sopping wet and put his dirty clothes back on, ensuring a constant funk of mildew, rear end and body odor surrounded him at all times. He almost got the Colonel in charge of us killed when he on radio watch; he'd turned the radio off because the sounds annoyed him. After the team our he was riding in was under fire for 45 minutes or so the Colonel used a cell phone to call our boss, who ran in to find Hall browsing Wikipedia and practicing reading and writing in binary.

But the worst was when the topic of his wife came up. Hall had a sweetheart back home who he had met while he was in his sophomore year of college, then married before he joined the Air Force. Throughout the course of various conversations he mentioned that he worked at a gas station at the time and she would come in, flirt with him, bring him food and generally 'be really cute.' Then one day he slipped out the bombshell. When she was coming to the gas station to visit him she was eleven years old. We did the math based off of his other stories and worked out that he married her when she was about 16, and she was already pregnant at that time. We actually had to suppress that information from getting out because we were worried that if someone beat the poo poo out of him and he died that we'd all get hosed for it, but needless to say nobody was very friendly with Hall after that.

TITTIEKISSER69
Mar 19, 2005

SAVE THE BEES
PLANT MORE TREES
CLEAN THE SEAS
KISS TITTIESS




You're a mess, Hall.

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

Wilford Cutlery posted:

You're a mess, Hall.

:thurman:

A Shitty Reporter
Oct 29, 2012
Dinosaur Gum

crazy cloud posted:

Alternatively stop living in fear and love your fellow sentient beings unconditionally

FCKGW
May 21, 2006

RevKrule posted:

The Bundy standoff got magical overnight.


Squizzle posted:

Now is the winter of his discount tent.

sweeperbravo
May 18, 2012

AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

once in a lifetime pun right there

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

The context of the pun is exquisite, but I was seeing that line on image macros back in 2002.

MoreLikeTen
Oct 21, 2012

The farmer's mistake was believing he had any control over his life.

Greatbacon posted:

There are also extensions that turn "snake people" into "snake-people", "skeletons" into "skeletons", and one that replaces YouTube comments with quotes from Nietzsche.

Truly ours is the best of all possible worlds.

These extensions make talking about these extensions very difficult

INCHI DICKARI
Aug 23, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

sweeperbravo posted:

once in a lifetime pun right there

Best one I saw on the forums about someone who I think their mom (?) Would dress as star wars characters and all I really remember was "looking for love in Alderaan places."

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

Karate Bastard
Jul 31, 2007

Soiled Meat

Zamboni_Rodeo posted:

Y'allahu Akbar, everybody! Yee-haw!



Ragequit posted:

Yeehawdism: 72 cousins in the afterlife

PleasingFungus
Oct 10, 2012
idiot asshole bitch who should fuck off

Popular Thug Drink posted:

my wife steels her gaze and looks out over the cold horizon. clouds gather on the distance. she ties her simple homespun scarf tighter around her head. "beej storm coming in. better get these handbeezys in the cellar before snow falls" she hardens her lips. life is tough here

china bot
Sep 7, 2014

you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX
Plaster Town Cop

one handbeezy, never given

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Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

oldpainless posted:

Hell 35 fags sounds like a fun party to me

It sounds like it ought to be the sequel to 47 Ronin, presumably after the Dirty Dozen quit.

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