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Tijuana Bibliophile posted:This raises more questions than it answers the invigilation team concluded that the fourth stimpire was copying off the third stimpire. the fourth stimpire was removed from the exam hall and given a zero on the final.
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Feb 4, 2016 13:36
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roflingstones posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTzNT8cWivo Obvious retort. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fn36l_z3WY
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Feb 4, 2016 13:38
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So after everything I wanted to share my StarCitizen story. Or timeline. Or whatever, this will be a low effort post really. --- It all began a long time ago in a galaxy far away… when Chris Roberts announced StarCitizen on Kickstarter. gently caress the timeline really but guess it started there. I took a look. Wow, it looked quite good for the time. Everything sounded too good to be true as well. Hmm. Well, let's wait somewhat. Time passes. More thinking… StarCitizen, the name sounds awful. It's CryEngine 3? They won't ever be able to pull that off in a manner that they planned to do. Hmm they are selling ships? Virtual ship goods with silly names as the backer levels like "High Admiral" or "Freelancer"? Man that's awful. They also sell "citizen cards" for some levels so you can identify as a StarCitizen…? Jeez, what a hack. Why would anyone do that? I'm a PC game? Alrighty then, well it could end up good or so idk whatever. Demos look promising somewhat. Did not back. Started out as a skeptic about the whole project, especially given how much they have raised in the whole timeframe of the Kickstarter. Wow what a blastoff. What a scam - I thought subconsciously. Months pass, I lost track a little bit. Wait, they are still selling ships and raising funds, promising more and more with every stretchgoal? Pets? Oh boy. Man whatever, I don't want to get invested. Few friends have, they feel greatly immersed and Chris' will be the savior of PC gaming. More time passes, they release the Hangar module. Wew, you can walk around in your hangar, looking at the virtual spaceships you bought - sometimes. If your ship is already hangar-ready. Ships look good, hangar looks ok-ish. All in all, looks promising, but I still expect them to not deliver anything, especially since there was zero gameplay at all. Losing track here, ignoring the project and still debating it with my friends telling them that this won't ever get released. Get looked down upon by them, given this will be the BDSSE. At some point start work for a company, learn to know colleagues, some game. More time passes. They decide to join StarCitizen given that meanwhile Arena Commander in an early version was released. They talk all the time about the game and ships, dreams and hopes and what they will be able to do. Ship sales increase. Colleagues and friends get invested even more. End of 2014, I jump the ship to better understand what the gently caress everyone is really so much raving about. Good time to join, I thought. Arena Commander 1.0 gets released. Bought into an Aurora LN. poo poo. Can't fly it since it's not ingame, have to fly with an MR loaner. That ship sucks. Played some hours, looked good, started seriously tracking what StarCitizen is about and what happens. Thought to myself "even if it doesn't ever get released, $50 is not much money" - Yeah I hate myself for that thought now. Arena Commander did not get much patches ongoing, development has apparently ceased kinda. Still, got a free AMD code from a friend since I helped them out, upgraded my Aurora ship to a Hornet because the Aurora is a flying piece of junk. StarMarine got announced and showed off. Exciting. Looked at the videos, looked bland and boring, started to get skeptical again. Colleagues still argue against me - plan a lot, they bought Orions with their Org and all that poo poo. gently caress that. StarMarine gets delayed, nothing happens. Arena Commander is still the same buggy mess that it was at the end of 2014. loving boring, man where is the open development? AtV and RtV, everything is boring poo poo talking about poo poo and no interesting news at all. Starting following the hype truck on reddit, spreading words of dissent and anger against the project, while trying to stay reasonable - ha - I know, good joke. Pretty pissed about the whole development by that point. Nothing happens, everyone is hyped, gently caress. Where is the deliverance?! At some point a giant leak explodes with tons of assets. Skeptic increases. StarMarine again got delayed. Colleagues still argue for the game. Derek Smarts starts appearing out of nowhere. gently caress. That guy is an rear end in a top hat, but he did some pretty good points. Much stuff gets uncovered and as a part-time developer I can feel most of the issues there and don't see no end to the story. Start following Smart since he appears to be the voice of reason in the sea of whales. Colleagues read some articles of his but disregard them because of his aggressive nature against the game and the people, especially since he didn't release anything noteworthy. Eh, whatever. Not my problem. StarMarine gets delayed again, they are hyping for the "Baby PU", teasing it at PAX and whatever. Doesn't look that exciting but eh, I'll take it. Maybe. Smart increases aggressiveness, I'm excited about what will happen next. November '15, finally stopped loving around and requested my refund. Didn't hear anything from them until late December, refund got denied. "Baby PU" releases. Nothing "P" and nothing "U" about that whole mess. Just a giant Arena Commander free flight map with ship spawning. Ugh. Broken, buggy mess with less content than a 50¢ flash game. gently caress. Sudden realization I'm seriously hosed and can't get back out of this mess. Substantial part of the game, my rear end. January '16. Discovered SA by accident. Started following this mess. Am now here. gently caress this poo poo. So, long story short, didn't believe in the project at the start, got weak at some point, stopped being weak and started being pissed. End of story.  StarCitizen - the backers won't know
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Feb 4, 2016 13:40
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CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:They have to make sure they're not touching their genitals while attaching alligator clips to them, or they'll be subjected to a penectomy/ovary razoring/womb bursting, AND then have to display it in public, AND get harassed and punched to a pulp. Against their will. PvP by consent only, sexual torture and gang violence compulsory. I'm starting to think that living in the fourth stimpire may be more hassle than it's worth.
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Feb 4, 2016 13:41
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AP posted:Can you link the full video of this? Probably not, all Ive ever seen is this here gifv
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Feb 4, 2016 13:43
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Tippis posted:There is something wrong with you. Like, Chris-level wrong. wow rude Tippis posted:Yeah, sorry. That was uncalled for. Ok that's fair.
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Feb 4, 2016 13:44
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alphabettitouretti posted:I'm starting to think that living in the fourth stimpire may be more hassle than it's worth. they have good schools and nice parks, efficient and cheap public transport and excellent work-life balance too when you're not being tortured to death over an eternity by having your genitals cut off and replaced with the worst kind of electricity imaginable, doubling in worseness every two seconds until the end of time
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Feb 4, 2016 13:45
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i had an email at work today from a mr stpierre, i didn't have my glases on and for a moment i thought it was from mr stimpire
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Feb 4, 2016 13:48
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cocaine dad show posted:i had an email at work today from a mr stpierre, i didn't have my glases on and for a moment i thought it was from mr stimpire "Sir, there's a Mr. Stimpire here to see you... he doesn't have an appointment." "DO NOT LET HIM IN."
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Feb 4, 2016 13:49
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Beet Wagon posted:"Sir, there's a Mr. Stimpire here to see you... he doesn't have an appointment." Remember: All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed.
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Feb 4, 2016 13:50
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Iglocska posted:Remember: All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed. Somehow, I find the long-term viability of this social system doubtful.
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Feb 4, 2016 13:52
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Tippis posted:Somehow, I find the long-term viability of this social system doubtful. it's easy because everyone's eyeballs are wired open at birth
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Feb 4, 2016 13:54
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CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:Yeah, and there have been cases before of non-Australian companies offering digital goods for sale in Australia, refusing to give refunds, and the ACCC taking them to town. With a little bit of research CIG would realise that they don't have a legal leg to stand on. Australian consumer law is pretty good (comparatively speaking). It was the ACCC that forced Steam to provide refunds.
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Feb 4, 2016 13:55
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Iglocska posted:Remember: All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed. You can watch them down at your favorite local pub while you enjoy a nice bisque made out of your former friends and relatives!
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Feb 4, 2016 13:58
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LOL if you don't think half of CIGs fundraising has just been money laundering
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Feb 4, 2016 14:00
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we've all had a good laugh about the stimpire but in reality i'd rather play a game about the stimpire than star citizen at this point
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Feb 4, 2016 14:00
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Tippis posted:Obvious retort. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fn36l_z3WY Obligatory response https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJsHtsOaKaE
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Feb 4, 2016 14:01
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Tippis posted:Somehow, I find the long-term viability of this social system doubtful. The thing outsiders don't get is that everyone lawyers the poo poo out of these rules and gets off on technicalities. Trying to trick each other into breaking the rules is looked at more like a tasteless prank than something you'd seek revenge for.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:01
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 not a cat person, but drat if that isn't adorable. 
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Feb 4, 2016 14:04
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Jobbo_Fett posted:Obligatory response https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9pPQnhhUqtU
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Feb 4, 2016 14:05
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For us English goons out there do you think Private eye would ever report on this fiasco? The same way that French magazine did?
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Feb 4, 2016 14:05
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:For us English goons out there do you think Private eye would ever report on this fiasco? The same way that French magazine did? I hope the Mail does one day
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Feb 4, 2016 14:06
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:For us English goons out there do you think Private eye would ever report on this fiasco? The same way that French magazine did? Maybe but they're usually quite dismissive of such things. They did a story on Tomb Raider once. Then someone from RPS wrote in to correct a mistake they made.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:10
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Booblord Zagats posted:I hope the Mail does one day I wonder how it would be spun into "NEW COD KILLER CAN'T BE STOPPED!" alphabettitouretti posted:Maybe but they're usually quite dismissive of such things. They did a story on Tomb Raider once. Then someone from RPS wrote in to correct a mistake they made. Ah well, i'd just like to see more pisstakes from people who knows it's a scam.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:13
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:I wonder how it would be spun into "NEW COD KILLER CAN'T BE STOPPED!" I'm guessing after Chris gets carted away by the FTC "Cokehound and Spouse Snapped Up by America in Manchester after Russian Drug Money was Found!"
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Feb 4, 2016 14:15
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It'd depend how far it goes. If it's just a case of Crobber being an incompetent project manager and Sandi going shopping at Restoration Hardware then I doubt they'd give a gently caress, if it turns out something truly shady is going on that would be of more interest, what with the links to Gizmondo.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:16
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Booblord Zagats posted:LOL if you don't think half of CIGs fundraising has just been money laundering The thing about criminal enterprises is that they don't really give a poo poo about loss, all they care about is keeping the train running for as long as possible. A popular laundering method for biker gangs over here are solariums and tattoo parlors where people often pay in cash, you can vastly over inflate your income with illicit money, happily pay the taxes and get legit money to fuel your lavish lifestyle. For CIG I'm sure it's a lot like political campaign finance. You pay your friends consulting firms at over inflated rates with backer/donor money and pocket it. For campaigns the preferred method is buying books to give away for free, for CIG it's probably studio rentals. CIG has used their money hilariously on stuff like the mocap studio and whatever the hell they're doing over in England with Chris's gangster friends.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:18
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Jobbo_Fett posted:Obligatory response https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzkAwCs5bnI e:  this track would be a good soundtrack for a future video
fuctifino fucked around with this message at 14:26 on Feb 4, 2016 |
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Feb 4, 2016 14:20
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:For us English goons out there do you think Private eye would ever report on this fiasco? The same way that French magazine did? People with a much bigger reach than PE are sniffing around this in the UK believe me
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Feb 4, 2016 14:21
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I'm still amazed that this has been going on for so long with so much money given and it seems hardly anyone is noticing.smellmycheese posted:People with a much bigger reach than PE are sniffing around this in the UK believe me Ohhoho!  goddamn it I can't wait.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:23
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Demiurge4 posted:The thing about criminal enterprises is that they don't really give a poo poo about loss, all they care about is keeping the train running for as long as possible. A popular laundering method for biker gangs over here are solariums and tattoo parlors where people often pay in cash, you can vastly over inflate your income with illicit money, happily pay the taxes and get legit money to fuel your lavish lifestyle. For CIG I'm sure it's a lot like political campaign finance. You pay your friends consulting firms at over inflated rates with backer/donor money and pocket it. For campaigns the preferred method is buying books to give away for free, for CIG it's probably studio rentals. Yeah, my theory is his gangster friends are floating pledges if they're doing the whole 75k a day average they claim. Its a large enough amount to look succesful and generate interest in the project through legitimate means while he spends the money on real estate, studios and equipment so they have a capital investment that can be cashed out without raising eyebrows. I wouldn;t be shocked if most of the cast of SQ42 are either celebrities his buddies wanted to meet or their no-name actress girlfriends who's careers they're trying to start. Early Hollywood worked in a surprisingly similar fashion e: Modern launderers are normally smarter though, just claim revenue from inflated real estate sales and investments in "soft" businesses like equity consultants and communications, pass it through a few tax havens and poo poo it out as investments in "legitimate" interests like the commodity markets and just sell them at a loss to get access to tax breaks. Went to a class on this not too long ago and the whole thing is really interesting Booblord Zagats fucked around with this message at 14:27 on Feb 4, 2016 |
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Feb 4, 2016 14:23
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Making it Rain posted:
I dont know man all that its missing is its tail split in two and it'll be extremely not cute specially since its in japan already
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Feb 4, 2016 14:24
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:I'm still amazed that this has been going on for so long with so much money given and it seems hardly anyone is noticing. the tax break / HMRC angle is what has piqued interest.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:24
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:For us English goons out there do you think Private eye would ever report on this fiasco? The same way that French magazine did? They would (probably), if they knew about it, were interested in it and thought people outside gaming would care about it. You could always fire some stuff their way, they won't notice on their own as it's not their field so they are not watching. Biggest ever crowdfunding thing might well grab their attention. They may not take to Derek, his communication style is an easy target for parody. Editorial address : strobes@private-eye.co.uk
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Feb 4, 2016 14:25
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smellmycheese posted:People with a much bigger reach than PE are sniffing around this in the UK believe me Like who? Tell us more, or suffer the full wrath of the fourth stimpire.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:27
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WhiskeyWhiskers posted:
Grats dude!
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Feb 4, 2016 14:28
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Tijuana Bibliophile posted:Well this isn't very constructive It really is an amazing thing. I'm been tempted to post it in GBS without comment.
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Feb 4, 2016 14:30
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alphabettitouretti posted:Like who? Tell us more, or suffer the full wrath of the fourth stimpire. Well me, for one. But I'm not going to say too much on here when we know its being monitored
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Feb 4, 2016 14:31
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Rhubarb94 posted:They would (probably), if they knew about it, were interested in it and thought people outside gaming would care about it. Yeah they're kind of more about mp's but the scandal of this might get them to look, If I was to email them and point them in a direction where would be a good start?
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Feb 4, 2016 14:31
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Booblord Zagats posted:I'm guessing after Chris gets carted away by the FTC The Meatball Mafia Connection: Did a race horse predict it all?
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Feb 4, 2016 14:31
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