|
STDH (poo poo That didn't Happen) is a proud Internet tradition whereby a story goes from plausible to ridiculous, primarily due to the way it is told. Saying "hi" to the cute cashier becomes an elaborate wedding proposal, if not a full-blown damsel in distress scenario where our Hero rescues the poor, petite girl from the ravening attacks of savages with his trusty katana. IOW, poo poo That Didn't Happen. There are several popular types that reappear, so naturally we want to see and ridicule them. Classic types include, but are not limited to: Adolf Einsteins These end with some version of"...and that child was...Adolf Hitler/Albert Einstein/John Kerry!" etc. Inspirationals These come to your inbox/feed via dear grandma, Aunt Beth, or another credulous person. Misfortune arises, people suffer, but prayers make it all right. "And after we prayed all night, in the morning we saw that Billy had grown-- a whole new head!" Romance People who have never even spoken to someone of the opposite sex love these. Someone threatens another person, and our hero steps in to save the day. These usually end with "and we're getting married tomorrow!" However, there are some thing which resemble STDH but don't belong here, namely: Jokes/Green Text Messages I know we're goons, but let's at least pretend we've been outside a couple of times, mmmkay? STDH must be published on the Internet somewhere, so Uncle Joe's story about how he totally reamed Hitler while Charlie Chaplin filmed it doesn't belong here. Unless they got married. Names don't belong. There's a thread for names. That's where La-a goes to be mauled to death by bears. Where do I find STDH? Like the Force, STDH is all around us. It can be discovered on various social media outlets, Not Always Right and its affiliates, Reddit, Fark, and of course right here on our own beloved SA. I don't think there's a thread here that doesn't have some lurking in the comments. Every message board has some, too. A sharp eye and some patience will yield plenty of STDH. Go forth, goons, and find STDH. Albert Hitler depends on you!
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 03:56 |
|
|
# ? Apr 24, 2024 21:22 |
|
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3631118 What has happened to the old thread? Full?
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 04:12 |
|
Gridlocked posted:http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3631118 It didn't happen
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 04:47 |
|
Gridlocked posted:http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3631118 The old thread's ancient, time for a reboot!
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 04:47 |
|
goose fleet posted:It didn't happen
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 04:50 |
|
I'd suggest we collect the all-time classic stdh on the first page, but let's be honest, they're classic for a reason and are showing up on your facebook wall right now.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 04:52 |
|
To christen the new thread, have my very favorite stdh from NARquote:Paging Leonidas To The Front Desk
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 05:43 |
|
"God, what is this madness?" should be the new title.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 06:06 |
|
hyperhazard posted:To christen the new thread, have my very favorite stdh from NAR No marriages, no Einsteins, no troops, no [store name], no clapping and no Bohemian Rhapsody. I, for one, demand a better standard for my STDH.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 06:15 |
|
Does anyone have the one stdh from the 2008 Obama thread that had a goon "loving owning" Right-wingers at some party?
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 06:46 |
|
Awww yiss, let's start this thread off right with a couple of classic Troper Tales:A troper posted:This troperrecently (A few weeks ago) got into a....little fight with his longtime nemesis, last day of (high)school, he may not be coming(droping out, my nemesis, not me) back, revenge bluh bluh merger childish things. He decides to come at me with a meter stick with a rather intimidating war cry. I merely tilt my head ever so slightly and plunk, it hits the wall behind my head, visibly dumbfounded he then attempts to slash me. Big mistake, my headphones got unplugged from my Ipod touch, and my favorite song was just beginning. Nightwish's song she is my sin and so begins my epic battle, he keeps slashing and lunging at me all while I dodge his blows and strokes. He attempts another headshot but I deftly grabbed it from him, he fell face first onto the floor, then I said one of my favorite badass boasts almost immediately afterword "On your knees...I want you to beg for forgiveness." my class's resident Video game gerd (Her own word she made, a combination of geek and nerd, she calls herself this all the time) said almost YELLING "Holy poo poo dude! That was awesome!" unfortunately his Girlfriend didnt think so, and tossed him the other meter stick and said "Kick that little snot into next year!"(Even though im taller then him he's like 5'4 im 5'7) and we exchanged blows which was eerily similar to aboved mentioned Final Fantasy movie, I then disarmed him and then said, "I hold no ill will, nor is this a personal matter, but thanks for the workout non-the less." He simply bowed his head in shame, his girlfriend having pure spasms of RAGE, chiding him that he couldn't beat a video game playing ultimate geek face(highly immature for a 16 year old girl I know), but I couldn't here them over the applause I was getting from the other geeks and my fellow peers, my teacher ( a substitute) woke up from her nap and simply said "what did I miss?" we all (except for my nemesis and his GF) begun laughing uncontrollably for a few minutes. I deadpanned afterwords "Nothing at all ma'am, just having some fun, listening to music, drawing, epic one sided battles..." She shrugged and went back to sleep. An inhuman posted:* This troper took a few levels when, after years of being a Woobie so pitiful Shinji would say what the heck is wrong with you, I had enough of a girl I liked always going for this tall, blond guy. When they were talking right in front of me in the street and holding arms and talking and all that, I said, "Shut. The. Hell. Up." The boy looks around and walks over, trying to look menacing. Martial arts studies come in. I take a punch to the forehead and then slide under and punch him in the stomach, he goes backwards and I land another one to his face. I then go berserk and full body tackle him. He managed to crawl away, and say, "That kid...is inhuman!"
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 06:59 |
|
Could we have a "no troper tales" rule this time around? I basically skip over them because the writing is so turgid. (Speaking in a personal capacity, my mod powers do not reach here!) ETA: Khazar-khum posted:Adolf Einsteins These end with some version of"...and that child was...Adolf Hitler/Albert Einstein/John Kerry!" etc. Absurd Alhazred has a new favorite as of 07:35 on Apr 15, 2016 |
# ? Apr 15, 2016 07:31 |
|
I find them pretty funny personally. They are loving terrible and that's a fine measure of quality in this thread.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 07:35 |
|
^^^ The Inhuman's story happened; 100% certain.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 07:36 |
|
Digirat posted:I find them pretty funny personally. They are loving terrible and that's a fine measure of quality in this thread. yeah troper tales are fine in my opinion
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 09:40 |
|
Another classic--33 pencilsquote:Arguably, this Troper is probably the youngest of which who suffers from this Trope. This is practically the invisible label that's under the invisible Berserk Button of this 13-year old kid. He broke 33 pencils in his life, and had a good friend break two of those pencils because they were too hard. He even yelled at someone because that guy was the third person who asked if he could be punched for the third time, with a teacher only a mile ahead!
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 10:23 |
|
I think as long as they're not dominating the thread they're fine
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 11:50 |
|
hyperhazard posted:To christen the new thread, have my very favorite stdh from NAR The thing that drives me crazy about these kind of stories is if it really happened, the customer going nuts over nothing is clearly mentally handicapped. Well done, you just man handled and kicked someone who probably has the mental age of a child.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 13:02 |
|
Tea Bone posted:The thing that drives me crazy about these kind of stories is if it really happened, the customer going nuts over nothing is clearly mentally handicapped. Well done, you just man handled and kicked someone who probably has the mental age of a child. Not to mention that the manager was fine with physically assaulting a customer just to quote a stupid catchphrase. That sounds like its worth losing you job over. Also I don't think I've ever seen a hardware store with a slammable front door, though I suppose there must still be one or two old mom n' pop stores out there.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 14:40 |
|
One of my service users gets mega constipated due to his meds and will lie about when he last pooped. Literally poo poo that didn't happen.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 15:15 |
|
NonzeroCircle posted:One of my service users gets mega constipated due to his meds and will lie about when he last pooped. Literally poo poo that didn't happen. Do you tell him he's full of poo poo?
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 15:24 |
|
sweeperbravo posted:I think as long as they're not dominating the thread they're fine Yeah, as long as we're not seeing pages of them at a time, they're okay. There's only so much "twelve-year-old kid trying to sound cool" you can take in at one time. Without missing a beat, I linked this for the new thread: Paladinus posted:probably the best dramatic reading ever ...was thanks lil nigga GOTTA STAY FAI has a new favorite as of 15:28 on Apr 15, 2016 |
# ? Apr 15, 2016 15:25 |
|
Absurd Alhazred posted:Could we have a "no troper tales" rule this time around? I basically skip over them because the writing is so turgid. hell no.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 15:47 |
|
My all time favorite STDHquote:I’m willing to go out on a limb here and guess that most stories of kindness do not begin with formerly drug-addicted celebrity bad boys. Mine does. You may or may not be a fan, but I am: His name is Robert Downey Jr., and it was the early ’90s (I was barely 20 years old) when this story took place.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 15:51 |
|
LITERALLY A BIRD posted:hell no. Agreed! Troper tales are an essential part of the process.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 16:05 |
|
Can't forget this little piece of perfection:quote:RANT TIME
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 16:17 |
|
^^^ Pretty sure that happened.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 16:31 |
|
GOTTA STAY FAI posted:Can't forget this little piece of perfection: I dunno, this is a nerd getting impotently mad about something utterly inconsequential, as a nerd who gets impotently mad about utterly inconsequential things I can 100% believe this happened.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 16:45 |
|
I tried to find the text of this one to copy and paste, but all I could get is an image of the original Tumblr post.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 16:56 |
|
In the end she just throws money at a man instead of decently handing it to him. What a loving bitch
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 16:59 |
|
I want "and the rest of us danced into the night" to show up in more of these. Right up there alongside "and then it turned into an MST3k-style riff fest" IMO.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 17:18 |
|
shit_that_didnt_happen.txt: and the rest of us danced into the night!
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 18:08 |
|
I remember those stupid "This is Sparta" stories were the prize of every pathological liar when 300 was all the rage.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 18:51 |
|
http://www.xojane.com/it-happened-to-me/almost-mugged-by-social-work-client
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 19:59 |
|
For posterity's sake, here's the OG Albert Einstein STDH:quote:Does evil exist?
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 20:15 |
|
Poop is really just the absence of not-poop.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 21:22 |
|
Twitch posted:Dancing Into the Night I love it when the antagonists openly admit their shortcomings or hypocrisy. As if any "You EARN your money/bootstraps/they don't deserve it" type would ever utter the phrase "My mom gives me my money" in public, rather than just pretending they didn't hear the question or sputtering that that's beside the point and you're just making assumptions etc. etc... Until you decide it's not worth it and walk away.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 21:38 |
|
Twitch posted:I tried to find the text of this one to copy and paste, but all I could get is an image of the original Tumblr post. I wish I could draw the scene in my head that I'm imagining with this STDH
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 22:05 |
|
Why did he watch a one legged man hop in circles for hours?
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 22:56 |
|
|
# ? Apr 24, 2024 21:22 |
|
Jay Rust posted:For posterity's sake, here's the OG Albert Einstein STDH: And that man who married his cousin and slept around on both of his wives... was Albert Einstein.
|
# ? Apr 15, 2016 22:58 |