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Milkfred E. Moore
Aug 27, 2006

'It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism.'
Awwww, that sucks, 100 percent of the Muslim world is Muslim:( #11,055

British Marines find cache of grenades stored at Umm Qasr school. Why were they searching a school, anyway? Also, buckets full of grenades are probably standard fare at muslim schools. #21,071

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peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos

Milky Moor posted:

Awwww, that sucks, 100 percent of the Muslim world is Muslim:( #11,055

British Marines find cache of grenades stored at Umm Qasr school. Why were they searching a school, anyway? Also, buckets full of grenades are probably standard fare at muslim schools. #21,071

dammit ben

G0RF
Mar 19, 2015

Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

spacetoaster posted:

-If I was going to rape 12 year old girls I'd get a vasectomy... but I'm not so I won't so there. #14,547

-Yeah, I could prolly take out several dozen of those 12 year olds once I get that Pilgrim Cross... #11,390


Get to it quickly my brethren.

Now more than ever, they should listen to my suggestions. I'm not try to be a jerk-- this is image management 101 stuff. Sandi learned it while pursuing her Masters in Market/Law/Business and seems to have forgotten it for some weird reason...

quote:

"5) REFRESH YOUR PUBLIC PERSONA BY ELEVATING NEW FACES - Ben and Sandi, I'm sorry to break the news to you, but each of you have lost credibility with the fanbase over the last year, for very different reasons. The rapturous reception of Sean Tracy by "Reverse the Verse" viewers is telling you something-- that a straight-talking and informed developer actually talking about the true state of the game is like manna from heaven to a starving people wandering the desert looking for the Promised Land. You could regain some goodwill with an increasingly restive population by replacing yourselves with Sean Tracy and Cherie Heiberg. Ben, you come across as Uninformed Unhinged and Sandi, you come across as Disinterested. Sean and Cherie are very informed, very interested and, in contrast to you both, they seem trustworthy, too. If you want to change the tone (and you should), it starts with replacing the mouthpieces.

-----

I recognize that this is constructive criticism, and will likely be seen as presumptuous and disingenuous, considering that it came from Something Awful. You seem far more likely to take action to our posts when you find us delighting in some smoking gun you've left buried somewhere that you need to track down and throw into the ocean.

Yet it is offered sincerely, and the advice is sound. Do not let 'director of spaceships' titles earned through sycophancy deafen you, Ben. Do not let your excessive self-regard as a Marketing Genius blind you, Sandi. Let neither your cash reserves nor past successes delude you about the present realities. There's a chill in the air now, guys, and it's not just the weather changing, it is the season.

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
If ben has this stuff, what other junk is hiding in everyone elses closet.

Stimpires real.

If this thread makes it to july 14th, seriously we need to DE-skeletonize and chill.

Milkfred E. Moore
Aug 27, 2006

'It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism.'
HOLY poo poo

:siren:

A cop shooting a 7-year old with a toy gun would be awesome, though. If there's one thing I hate more than six year old boys, it's seven year old boys. #21,724

:siren:

Toops
Nov 5, 2015

-find mood stabilizers
-also,

spacetoaster posted:

-Anyway, it turns out my mom taped the news for me while I was away, so I have like a week of Kerri-Lee to go through... #13,502

-Oh, I followed several women who looked sort of like Kerri-Lee around the science museum, but none of them turned out to be her:~( #13,846

-And with my position as Kerri-Lee of the CIC, cool knife AND uniform, I'll be the cult leader! #14,539

-As in "Over the Kerri-lee for the traffic, she's got great breasts.." #15,608

-What good is the world when I've no Kerri-Lee:~(? Of course, if I took over the world, I could have all the Kerri-Lee I wanted. The world it is, then, chaps. #17,284

-Wow, Kerri-Lee at the hardware store. I'd like to ware her... hard #19,478

-I have two pictures in frames on my desk at work: a picture of a spotted stingray marked 'Cat' and a printed glossy picture of Kerri-Lee. #20,382

<Byydo> some guys try to un-circumsize themselves by hanging weights from their penis
<LOAF> !Kerri-Lee
<LOAF> The concept of something hanging from my penis reminded me. #21,608

:dogbutton:


http://trelane.hamtwoslices.net/index.php?query=kerri

Guys I'm starting to think this Ben guy is a bit of a creep.

peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos
I've always seen ben as a daft but pretty ok guy, I know others hate him or whatever but I never have.
This stuff though, I dunno, this is hosed up

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

SelenicMartian posted:

I hope the events following 9/11 have taught our generation an important lesson: do not force our stupid, stupid children to read 1984 in middle school. #21,861

I have nothing but snarling hatred for this

Salt n Reba McEntire
Nov 14, 2000

Kuparp.
I'm somewhat relieved that he's both physically and mentally repulsive; was starting to feel uncuntfortable.

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
Remember guys it's a joke, that is all it is.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Scarily, I did impress a girl by telling her I was responsible for the school having those blue emergency phones:( She didn't get the joke and assumed I was some kind of womens rights protester, I guess. #20,635

If you had my job at your campus you could watch protests from your window. You know what they should protest? How much comic books cost these days. #21,750

Ash1138
Sep 29, 2001

Get up, chief. We're just gettin' started.

So this is the poo poo that Ben puts up on the internet for all to see.

What depravity is he keeping hidden?

Dogstoyevsky
Oct 9, 2012

If there is no Dog, everything is permitted
Someone post a cool thing that Ben said just as a palate cleanser and reminder that humans are complicated.

Lol just kidding, don't.

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

Milky Moor posted:

HOLY poo poo

:siren:

A cop shooting a 7-year old with a toy gun would be awesome, though. If there's one thing I hate more than six year old boys, it's seven year old boys. #21,724

:siren:

Stop the presses. There's a hot scoop that needs to be arrested.

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.


Can we please stop making fun of Ben? He had one eyeball and an unshaved pube-stache in high school and was obviously picked on terribly until he understandibly became broken and twisted. Can we show at least a bit of empathy and understanding to this heaping hog of human flesh? Thank you.

runsamok
Jan 12, 2011

orcinus posted:

I fail to see how any of that is news.
They've been using Twin Bros to collect EU funding since end of kickstarter.

Back then, they justified it by saying they don't have a payment processor set up for EU yet.
Obviously bullshit, but who knew way back then.

If anyone wants, i can dig through my emails, maybe i can find a payment confirmation from back then.

Here's the paypal header for my one transaction that shows up as Twin Bros (I bought in EUR instead of USD to take advantage of the exchange rate "deal" they offered)

his nibs
Feb 27, 2016

:kayak:Welcome to the:kayak:
Dream Factory
:kayak:
Grimey Drawer


:stare:

Damn Dirty Ape
Jan 23, 2015

I love you Dr. Zaius



Milky Moor posted:

Awwww, that sucks, 100 percent of the Muslim world is Muslim:( #11,055

British Marines find cache of grenades stored at Umm Qasr school. Why were they searching a school, anyway? Also, buckets full of grenades are probably standard fare at muslim schools. #21,071


I.... don't even know what to post about this anymore.

e: ^^^^^ I think :stare: sums it up

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Decrepus posted:

Can we please stop making fun of Ben? He had one eyeball and an unshaved pube-stache in high school and was obviously picked on terribly until he understandibly became broken and twisted. Can we show at least a bit of empathy and understanding to this heaping hog of human flesh? Thank you.

Crazy_BlackParrot
Feb 1, 2016

Christ Roberts is way better than toilet lord...
:gary: :lesnick: :yarg:
:pgabz: :fuzzknot: :eonwe:
:wtchris:
And here I'm just sitting... waiting for this Ben site to pop up on the reddit/general forum.

Also someone should tweet this to that lizzy girl from the escapist lol.

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

drat Dirty Ape posted:

I.... don't even know what to post about this anymore.

Ya WhoAh Did erhP dId eh WOh diD

Sir Simon Milligan
Mar 27, 2003

Yes, I have walked along the path of evil many times, it's a twisting curving path, that actually leads to a charming block garden, but beyond that evil!

Bens joke website is great, this guy is like Andy Kaufman levels dedicated to his character.

Salt n Reba McEntire
Nov 14, 2000

Kuparp.
Ah shucks, you're probably right. He's been bullied into this messed up state, and isn't wholly acuntable for his actions...

Damn Dirty Ape
Jan 23, 2015

I love you Dr. Zaius



Mr.Tophat posted:

Ya WhoAh Did erhP dId eh WOh diD

That always makes me think of the yip yips.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Crazy_BlackParrot posted:

And here I'm just sitting... waiting for this Ben site to pop up on the reddit/general forum.

Hey, I'm bringing Zoe Quinn into this. You guys handle that.

And please link it here too. Thanks.

NLJP
Aug 26, 2004


So Ben made his own bash.org but forgot to make any of his quotes have any worth, humour or humanity whatsoever.

This is just so sad.

Milkfred E. Moore
Aug 27, 2006

'It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism.'
Skip them. Say you're protesting Columbus' brutal brutalization of the new world. Dumbass liberal college weirdos would appreciate that. #19,249

I'm a republican, because Wing Commander: Fleet ACtion tells me to be. #15,860

Speaking of politics, you know what kind is great? American. #19,687

CrazyTolradi
Oct 2, 2011

It feels so good to be so bad.....at posting.

Milky Moor posted:

But how? Why? How did he stagnate at the age of fifteen or whenever that photo was taken and just refuse to progress further?
Taking a stab in the dark on this one, but I'm guessing as a child Mr Lesnick has a huge gaping void to fill and Wing Commander filled it. He credits it with curing blindness in the one functional eye he has left, maybe that was the point it all happened?

I can really see Ben being the stereotypical lonely kid/teenager, who EVERYONE at school picked on. So he'd go home and escape into his Wing Commander fantasy world, where Chris Roberts liked him and he was this great pilot, etc. Eventually, he found other broken people just like him and made his site, his fantasy enabling him to become their leader.

Like, when I saw that school ID photo of him, I felt sympathy/pity for the guy, but with everything else that's been dug up, nah gently caress him. You can be a loner, be picked on by everyone, but you don't have to be like Ben in response to it.

runsamok
Jan 12, 2011

Skellybones posted:

(Panicked phone call to the States)

"Mr Roberts! He's here! He's walking around the lobby saying hello to everyone and touching things! What do we do?! No, the new space ship doors are working, there's no way he can get further inside now - He just clipped through the wall! Help! NOO-"

"HELO COMANDO."

*click*

Make sure you've got a bluetooth speaker going at full blast with perfectly topical pop hits bumping outta it.

MeLKoR
Dec 23, 2004

by FactsAreUseless

Fat Shat Sings posted:

I've seen a bunch of talk about the grey market account shutdowns and things like that here / on reddit.

I'm skipping ahead a few pages but has anyone thought about the supposed FCA investigations and their relation to the grey market issues?

It's either that or CIG is actively destroying their own grey market and hurting themselves pretty badly. I just don't know which option is funnier.

There is a third and much funnier option which is... who's to say that these supposed "chargebacks from the original buyer" even took place? They have a huge pool of people that bought ships in the grey market that they can simply extort at will. "The backers will never know".

e:
If by chance someone has proof that no chargeback took place "ooops, you're right it was an unfortunate tracking mix-up. drat database!"

MeLKoR fucked around with this message at 16:00 on Apr 16, 2016

SomethingJones
Mar 6, 2016

<3

D_Smart posted:

In this thread, you quoted an image which has been removed. Please go and edit your post and REMOVE that image!! Don't get this thread locked over poo poo like this. You KNOW the rules!!!

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3748466&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=3265#post458764975

Ah gently caress poo poo sorry. Removed.

Milkfred E. Moore
Aug 27, 2006

'It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism.'

CrazyTolradi posted:

Taking a stab in the dark on this one, but I'm guessing as a child Mr Lesnick has a huge gaping void to fill and Wing Commander filled it. He credits it with curing blindness in the one functional eye he has left, maybe that was the point it all happened?

I can really see Ben being the stereotypical lonely kid/teenager, who EVERYONE at school picked on. So he'd go home and escape into his Wing Commander fantasy world, where Chris Roberts liked him and he was this great pilot, etc. Eventually, he found other broken people just like him and made his site, his fantasy enabling him to become their leader.

Like, when I saw that school ID photo of him, I felt sympathy/pity for the guy, but with everything else that's been dug up, nah gently caress him. You can be a loner, be picked on by everyone, but you don't have to be like Ben in response to it.

That's the thing. I was a lonely kid/teenager and I'd wager a lot of the people in this thread were too. Most of these people either grow out of their shell, reinvent themselves at college, or just whatever.

But Ben stuck with Wing Commander to the extent that it basically became his entire life.

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

runsamok posted:

Make sure you've got a bluetooth speaker going at full blast with perfectly topical pop hits bumping outta it.

You've got the touch! You've got the pow-aaaaaaaa

YEAH!

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Dogstoyevsky posted:

Someone post a cool thing that Ben said just as a palate cleanser and reminder that humans are complicated.
I'd like to have sex with four beautiful women and watch Das Boot first... #8,941

Decrepus posted:

Can we please stop making fun of Ben? He had one eyeball and an unshaved pube-stache in high school and was obviously picked on terribly until he understandibly became broken and twisted. Can we show at least a bit of empathy and understanding to this heaping hog of human flesh? Thank you.
Wow, when I go to college I plan to lock myself in a metal box underwater and avoid all human contact... Its the best way to meet women fish... #12,827
ANyway, I'll be in Texas, women will beg to be in my cool cool metal box... #12,828

God dammit, all the women who like Star Trek are hideous. #21,001

Kerri-Lee Halkett takes a look at some tools for women. That sounds like an amazing segment. #21,027

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

SomethingJones posted:

Ah gently caress poo poo sorry. Removed.

gj

ewe2
Jul 1, 2009

I'm writing a polka parody of Ben to deal with this.

Mr.Tophat
Apr 7, 2007

You clearly don't understand joke development :justpost:

drat Dirty Ape posted:

That always makes me think of the yip yips.

Oh man, you could easily remix the two

Phi230
Feb 2, 2016

by Fluffdaddy

spacetoaster posted:

I've got your back commando!



(that's Zoe Quinn)

:derp:

My hero

I hope something positive comes outta this. Ben gets fired for this at a minimum.

Hopefully gains traction among people like Quinn and Sarkeesian so it puts pressire on CIG to fire this piece of human trash.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

runsamok posted:

Make sure you've got a bluetooth speaker going at full blast with perfectly topical pop hits bumping outta it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwSoG8R_aUY&list=LLiuVX2traAHMLPX_zTLWRsw&index=40

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Milkfred E. Moore
Aug 27, 2006

'It's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism.'

SelenicMartian posted:

I'd like to have sex with four beautiful women and watch Das Boot first... #8,941

Wow, when I go to college I plan to lock myself in a metal box underwater and avoid all human contact... Its the best way to meet women fish... #12,827
ANyway, I'll be in Texas, women will beg to be in my cool cool metal box... #12,828

God dammit, all the women who like Star Trek are hideous. #21,001

Kerri-Lee Halkett takes a look at some tools for women. That sounds like an amazing segment. #21,027

Yeah, Wing Commander fans (aside from Chris) are all incredibly ugly people. The fan directory is like a chamber of horrors... #14,148

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