Annual Everest Thread: Well they always told me getting high was dangerous.

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Annual Everest Thread: Well they always told me getting high was dangerous.

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Rondette: Nov 4, 2009; Your friendly neighbourhood Postie.; Grimey Drawer

Microwaves Mom posted:

well, I guess you could get technical on it if ones already taken.

That's what everyone else has been doing since Tenzing and Hillary summited.

# ? May 13, 2016 18:38

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 17:53

pr0k: Jan 16, 2001; "Well if it's gonna be
that kind of party..."

First ten-piece band to summit without the use of double reeds.

# ? May 13, 2016 21:02

SulfurMonoxideCute: Feb 9, 2008; I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

First Canadian of mixed Polish and Irish descent with lactose intolerance and one second toe longer than a big toe on the right foot and a weird mole on her stomach to summit Everest.

# ? May 13, 2016 23:22

Ceciltron: Jan 11, 2007; Text BEEP to 43527 for the dancing robot!; Pillbug

First asexual mountainkin asmr roleplayer youtube celebrity to summit mount everest.

# ? May 13, 2016 23:28

Flipperwaldt: Nov 11, 2011; Won't somebody think of the starving hamsters in China?

Picnic Princess posted:

First Canadian of mixed Polish and Irish descent with lactose intolerance and one second toe longer than a big toe on the right foot and a weird mole on her stomach to summit Everest.

... on a wednesday.

# ? May 13, 2016 23:31

Beastie: Nov 3, 2006; They used to call me tricky-kid, I lived the life they wish they did.

Ceciltron posted:

First asexual mountainkin asmr roleplayer youtube celebrity to summit mount everest.

Make sure to like and subscribe.

# ? May 13, 2016 23:43

GTO: Sep 16, 2003

First SA forums poster to summit.

# ? May 14, 2016 00:00

bean mom: Jan 30, 2009

Paramemetic posted:

Does it matter the order? Like to be first serial killer to summit do you have to already be a serial killer? Or can you summit and then take up serial killing and get the title retroactively?

also don't gently caress up and be a mere spree killer, that would sure be embarassing

# ? May 14, 2016 01:01

Dreddout: Oct 1, 2015; You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

GTO posted:

First SA forums poster to summit.

Do we bet on our own deaths?

# ? May 14, 2016 01:27

Cartoon: Jun 20, 2008; poop

esb posted:

I climbed a 2500m mountain once was gonna be a guided trip where everyone are tied together so when u fall down some crack or something you should be saved.. maybe?

for some reason the guides never showed i had been waiting for a long time so i just said gently caress it and went to the top on my own, didnt even fall through the snow

Have we ever got a fresh new challenge for you!

First virgin to summit, oh wait that was Hillary.

# ? May 14, 2016 01:29

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Dreddout posted:

Do we bet on our own deaths?

gently caress if im paying out

# ? May 14, 2016 03:20

Paramemetic: Sep 29, 2003; Area 51. You heard of it, right?; Fallen Rib

Zyla posted:

also don't gently caress up and be a mere spree killer, that would sure be embarassing

Seriously. I mean being the first serial killer takes actual dedication, time, effort. First spree killer is basically nonsense. Easy mode.

# ? May 14, 2016 03:25

axeil: Feb 14, 2006

Paramemetic posted:

Seriously. I mean being the first serial killer takes actual dedication, time, effort. First spree killer is basically nonsense. Easy mode.

You've also got to have a good gimmick if you're an Everest serial killer. You can't just stab people with an ice axe and call it a day.

# ? May 14, 2016 04:01

Sono: Apr 9, 2008

Paramemetic posted:

Does it matter the order? Like to be first serial killer to summit do you have to already be a serial killer? Or can you summit and then take up serial killing and get the title retroactively?

What if you're the first serial killer to summit, but then someone who summitted before you takes up serial killing? Do you lose the title?

# ? May 14, 2016 04:13

DAAS Kapitalist: Nov 9, 2005; Jackass: The Mad Monk

Don't try this at home.

With all the bodies up there are we sure the serial killer one hasn't already been done?

# ? May 14, 2016 04:21

Bobby Digital: Sep 4, 2009

Are we all forgetting the Everest Eliminator?

# ? May 14, 2016 04:32

BobHoward: Feb 13, 2012; The only thing white people deserve is a bullet to their empty skull

The serial killer's name is Chomolungma.

# ? May 14, 2016 04:33

Fallows: Jan 20, 2005; If he waits long enough he can use his accrued interest from his savings to bring his negative checking balance back into the black.

The mountain is the serial killer

# ? May 14, 2016 04:33

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Fallows posted:

The mountain is the serial killer

Boooooo this twist is byllshit

# ? May 14, 2016 04:46

Artemis J Brassnuts: Jan 2, 2009; I regret😢 to inform📢 I am the most sexually🍆 vanilla 🍦straight 📏 dude😰 on the planet🌎

Germstore posted:

the poop situation up there is already bad enough

The technical term is "shituation".

# ? May 14, 2016 19:16

gohuskies: Oct 23, 2010; I spend a lot of time making posts to justify why I'm not a self centered shithead that just wants to act like COVID isn't a thing.

Today's update from Alan Arnette - Fast Summit Start Slows with Wind

quote:

Gambling that the current high winds will let up during the summit climb, multiple climbers and at least one team, Adventure Global are on their push to summit Everest. Most teams however are looking at topping out on the 18th or 19th of May.

Fast Start to the Season
After a fast start to the season with an impressive team of Sherpas fixing the ropes to the summit on May 11th, a couple of high profile climbers who were under the radar at base camp, made a stealth climb to summit on the heels of the Sherpas to claim first foreigner summit status.

What I called Summit Wave 1, on May 12th, the UK�s Kenton Cool got his 12th summit while guiding client Robert Richard Lucas. Sherpa Guides Pemba Bhote and Dorchi Gyalzen summited with them. 13 minutes later, Mexican climber David Liano Gonzalez and Pasang Rita Sherpa also summited. This was Liano�s fifth summit and he was planning on not using supplemental oxygen.

Next was Wave 2, when targeting a very short weather window, climbers from Himalayan Experience (Himex), Jagged Globe and Asian Trekking pushed thru high winds and some felt, deep snow, to put 25 people on the summit on May 13th. All climbers are reported to be back at either Camp 2 or Base Camp.

Today, Wave 3, May 14th more climbers are fighting high winds as they move towards the summit. I will post an update on their status when more information is available.

Summit Conditions
It takes about seven days from Everest Base Camp on the Nepal side to reach the summit and back: climb to Camp 2 and spend 2 nights, climb to Camp 3 and spend a night, then climb to South Col and leave that same day for the summit, hopefully summit early the next morning and return to South Col or Camp 2 and finally return to base camp.

Climbers can tolerate poor weather on the first and last couple of days but for the summit push, they need winds lower than 30 mph/48 kph. Wind speeds higher than that can easily result in frostbite or worse. Lite snow is acceptable but when combined with high winds can create dangerous blizzard conditions and even following a fixed rope, can result in climbers getting lost or going too slowly to summit and using up all their supplemental oxygen.

Going too slowly and not turning around is one of the largest contributors to death while on the summit push.

Finally a condition called hoar frost can create dangerous conditions when the humidity from air, or even from climbers, crystallizes creating a thin layer of ice on surfaces, including a climber�s down suit, making everything look like an ice sculpture, obscuring visibility and creating cold conditions. This happened to several teams in 2012 on their summit push forcing most to retreat.

Most reputable teams buy a weather forecast from sources like Michael Fagin in Seattle, Meteotest in Switzerland or freelance sources like Chris Tomer in Denver. These provide guidance as to incoming fronts and wind speeds. Other teams �draft� off the larger well established teams saving a tiny amount of money relative to the overall expense but increasing their risks., not to mention poor style.

Tibet
As of this post, the ropes have not been set to the summit by the Chinese on the Tibet side. This has stalled most summit plans. Seven Summits Club made an attempt but stopped lacking fixed ropes and poor weather conditions a few days ago.

Meanwhile there are climbers above the North Col, mostly those acclimatizing while attempting to climb without supplemental oxygen, but there have been no summits in 2016 thus far. I expect to see a massive push once the ropes are in and a good weather window emerges, perhaps as soon as May 18/19, similar to the south.

Normal Season
As I have been saying for a few weeks now, Everest 2016 continues to behave like a �normal� season down to the weather conditions. Also as noted, there have been warm temps at base camp but these warm conditions have not had a serious impact on the upper mountain and in fact, the snow conditions are more like a cold season up high with a layer snow at the South Col which is usually barren rock.

With at least another 200 foreigners and that many Sherpas still waiting for their summit opportunity, the hope is for several days of low winds. This will allow teams to spread out and reduce potential crowds.

My sincere hopes for a continued safe season for all.

# ? May 14, 2016 19:49

Tochiazuma: Feb 16, 2007

Alan Arnette posted:

My sincere hopes for a continued safe season for all.

Well THAT dude is clearly not a goon

# ? May 14, 2016 20:55

sullat: Jan 9, 2012

Sono posted:

What if you're the first serial killer to summit, but then someone who summitted before you takes up serial killing? Do you lose the title?

To be safe, you should take up only killing people who have summitted before you. Helps prevent that sort of thing.

# ? May 15, 2016 00:45

Cojawfee: May 31, 2006; I think the US is dumb for not using Celsius

What do you guys think is the main reason why people choose to die on the mountain? Is it the fact that they are almost there or that they spend tens of thousands of dollars to get there, or maybe something else? If it cost 20 dollars to get to the top, do you think people would be more willing to turn back and try again later?

# ? May 15, 2016 00:52

RKRGoat: Jun 20, 2003

Cojawfee posted:

What do you guys think is the main reason why people choose to die on the mountain? Is it the fact that they are almost there or that they spend tens of thousands of dollars to get there, or maybe something else? If it cost 20 dollars to get to the top, do you think people would be more willing to turn back and try again later?

They have like 1/3rd of the oxygen their brain needs to function at that height.

# ? May 15, 2016 02:02

Nether Postlude: Aug 17, 2009; His mind will keep
reverting to the last
biscuit on the plate.

RKRGoat posted:

They have like 1/3rd of the oxygen their brain needs to function at that height.

Plus, your body is actively dying above 8000m (it's called the "death zone" for a reason), you don't have good cognitive and reasoning skills (simple math is hard), it's cold as gently caress, and if you weren't in one of the first groups to go up that morning, you're probably stuck waiting in a queue to get back down the loving mountain. You're exhausted and you just want to sit down - just for a minute to rest. But you can't. 8000m is considered an extreme altitude, where the human body simply cannot acclimate and if you stay too long up there without supplemental oxygen, your body's functions will break down and you end up being Green Boots II of Shitshow Mountain.

Good times.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Effects_of_high_altitude_on_humans

Nether Postlude fucked around with this message at 04:42 on May 15, 2016

# ? May 15, 2016 04:35

Cojawfee: May 31, 2006; I think the US is dumb for not using Celsius

Yes, but I'm wondering what they are thinking in that state. When a sherpa says you have to turn back and you can't make it to the summit but they keep on going anyway. What is the justification they have.

# ? May 15, 2016 07:02

Maluco Marinero: Jan 18, 2001; Damn that's a
fine elephant.

They turn back to baser instincts. These are the kind of people who think their wealth backs up their opinion. If they were in a lifeboat with a 30 years experience captain they'd probably still want to say their piece, regardless of how woefully deficient they are in terms of relevant knowledge and skill.

Everest being reduced to a bucket list item for people means they probably think of Sherpas as 'the help', rather than 'the people who carry hundreds of clueless people up a mountain every year'. You think they're gonna listen to 'the help'.

# ? May 15, 2016 07:11

GRILLARY CLINTON: Mar 5, 2016; I know the devil is real.
I know the devil is real.

Cojawfee posted:

What do you guys think is the main reason why people choose to die on the mountain? Is it the fact that they are almost there or that they spend tens of thousands of dollars to get there, or maybe something else? If it cost 20 dollars to get to the top, do you think people would be more willing to turn back and try again later?

i think that to summit everest it's just physically necessary to push yourself well beyond the point of rational decision making so that you can continue in spite of the entire apparatus of your body telling you to stop.

# ? May 15, 2016 07:50

webmeister: Jan 31, 2007; The answer is, mate, because I want to do you slowly. There has to be a bit of sport in this for all of us. In the psychological battle stakes, we are stripped down and ready to go. I want to see those ashen-faced performances; I want more of them. I want to be encouraged. I want to see you squirm.

Yeah it's basically that. Your body is literally falling to pieces, and you're getting so little oxygen that rational decisions just aren't possible. If you've spent years focusing on the goal of summiting, your brain isn't going to accept turning back as an answer. Even super-experienced mountaineers get summit fever.

If you've ever had to chaperone a ridiculously drunk friend home from a night out, that's basically what the sherpas are doing.

# ? May 15, 2016 08:04

Rondette: Nov 4, 2009; Your friendly neighbourhood Postie.; Grimey Drawer

I'm glad KENTON COOL summited.

# ? May 15, 2016 08:05

GTO: Sep 16, 2003

There is also the aspect that the summit is only half way. Lots of people summit but don't leave enough for the way back down. I imagine a decent chunk of summit fever fatalities are caused by people losing sight of the descent and fixation on the immediate goal of reaching the summit rather than the overall goal of reaching the summit, then Base Camp.

# ? May 15, 2016 09:12

Microwaves Mom: Nov 8, 2015; by zen death robot

GTO posted:

There is also the aspect that the summit is only half way. Lots of people summit but don't leave enough for the way back down. I imagine a decent chunk of summit fever fatalities are caused by people losing sight of the descent and fixation on the immediate goal of reaching the summit rather than the overall goal of reaching the summit, then Base Camp.

canadaflag.jpg

# ? May 15, 2016 09:22

Super Space Jam 64: Jan 6, 2010; Yet another violation of regulation 1910 subpart D.

It's May 15, has anyone died yet

# ? May 16, 2016 06:35

my cat is norris: Mar 11, 2010; #onecallcat

NPR had a nice story about the Sherpa this weekend.

http://www.npr.org/2016/05/14/478040513/sherpas-first-to-climb-mount-everest-after-2-years-of-avalanches

# ? May 16, 2016 13:14

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

Cojawfee posted:

What do you guys think is the main reason why people choose to die on the mountain? Is it the fact that they are almost there or that they spend tens of thousands of dollars to get there, or maybe something else? If it cost 20 dollars to get to the top, do you think people would be more willing to turn back and try again later?

As other people have pointed out the Death Zone does whacky stuff to the brain, which greatly increases the chance of making bad decisions.

Other lots climbers getting obsessed with reaching the summit give all the time and expense involved, with many of deaths being due to attempting to summit despite being outside the safe window in terms of time.

# ? May 16, 2016 13:26

Dick Milhous Rock!: Aug 9, 1974

DAAS Kapitalist posted:

With all the bodies up there are we sure the serial killer one hasn't already been done?

Well, at this point enough people are summit in you could probably do a bit of statistical analysis and see if there's a possibility of there being a serial killer already active on the mountain. It's already full of white guys that everyone agrees are 'nice people.' Just compare fatalities between the different climbing operations, control for experience, and see if there are years that particular groups experience higher than average fatalities consistently. At the very least you'd determine who you shouldn't walk up a really big hill with.

I mean, the zodiac killer ran for the nomination, who knows what serial killer hobbies include these days.

# ? May 16, 2016 15:06