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Lady Naga
Apr 25, 2008

Voyons Donc!

EclecticTastes posted:

I only recently learned that the American opening theme is the actual melody for one of the Japanese intros. Too bad DBZ got stuck with the generic buttrock (still better than most Toonami series, they didn't get their OPs played at all).

Dragon Ball Z got a different opener in Canada, and it is much worse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEl9skiNc88

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Nidoking
Jan 27, 2009

I fought the lava, and the lava won.
In Japanese, Sailor Moon's speech to the bad guys actually refers to herself as "the Sailor-Suited Pretty Guardian, Sailor Moon," so I'm pretty sure that's a literal translation.

Getsuya
Oct 2, 2013
Would it ruin the fun if I took a peek at the original Japanese version and pointed out what some of the more nonsensical translations were supposed to mean? I don't want to get all elitist and nitpick the whole thing but I'm just wondering if anyone's curious what some of those parts that straight up didn't make sense were actually supposed to be saying.

Also best SNES Sailor Moon game was the Sailor Moon R beat-em up because you could play as Rini and everyone's attacks would go right over your head. You could very nearly beat the whole game without taking damage.

EclecticTastes
Sep 17, 2012

"Most plans are critically flawed by their own logic. A failure at any step will ruin everything after it. That's just basic cause and effect. It's easy for a good plan to fall apart. Therefore, a plan that has no attachment to logic cannot be stopped."

Lady Naga posted:

Dragon Ball Z got a different opener in Canada, and it is much worse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEl9skiNc88

:stare:

That... that sure is an attempt at music, there.

So, I decided to hit up Hulu and watch some Sailor Moon, and it turned out there was a story arc that never aired on Toonami (the one with the Sailor Starlights where the bad guys are Sailors that turn people in fake Sailors and everything is Sailors), and that's how I've just learned of Sailor Chibi Chibi Moon. It's like they looked at Rini Chibiusa and were like "Eh, let's make a smaller and even more annoying version of that". Also, I looked it up and there are way more Sailor Soldiers than I realized, and the continuity makes next to no sense. Though, I can understand that, given that any long-running comic that makes frequent use of time travel inevitably sees that entire portion of its continuity collapse into incomprehensible nonsense (SEE: X-Men, particularly the many alternate versions of Nate Summers).

Lady Naga
Apr 25, 2008

Voyons Donc!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVrVTinOsBw
We also got our own opening for the original Dragon Ball, which is equally amazing.

~friends working together~

claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

EclecticTastes posted:

and that's how I've just learned of Sailor Chibi Chibi Moon. It's like they looked at Rini Chibiusa and were like "Eh, let's make a smaller and even more annoying version of that".

Yeah it's a good thing she isn't in this game. But not for why you think.

incredibly metal

MonsterEnvy
Feb 4, 2012

Shocked I tell you

Lady Naga posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVrVTinOsBw
We also got our own opening for the original Dragon Ball, which is equally amazing.

~friends working together~

Odd I am canadian and I remember this being the opening for when I watched it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BT1Dp69D7q0

Which I think is literally a translation of the original opening.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7kZVH849Eo

Lady Naga
Apr 25, 2008

Voyons Donc!

MonsterEnvy posted:

Odd I am canadian and I remember this being the opening for when I watched it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BT1Dp69D7q0

There's like 4 or 5 dubs for both Dragon Balls (I think GT only has the one though) so it's dependant on what year and what channel you watched.

MonsterEnvy
Feb 4, 2012

Shocked I tell you

Lady Naga posted:

There's like 4 or 5 dubs for both Dragon Balls (I think GT only has the one though) so it's dependant on what year and what channel you watched.

I think GT had two as well or at least Canada and US had different openings.

To at least relate this to Sailor Moon here is the original opening for the anime

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8Rvwu8Wykw

MonsterEnvy fucked around with this message at 02:58 on Jun 9, 2016

Sionja
Sep 3, 2011
Oh boy, oh boy, I don't know how I missed this thread. :allears: I am unabashedly a huge Sailor Moon fan to this day but I've never actually played this game for more than maybe 15 minutes when I was twelve or thirteen. I don't remember anything but the opening area so I'm pretty excited to see how bad this gets. God speed, OP.

FractalSandwich
Apr 25, 2010

MonsterEnvy posted:

To at least relate this to Sailor Moon here is the original opening for the anime
I have a deep respect for songs that make up bullshit alternate readings for kanji to be cute, and kuni "country; homeland" for 地球 "Earth" is one of the best (worst) I've ever seen.

esperterra
Mar 24, 2010

SHINee's back




Lady Naga posted:

Dragon Ball Z got a different opener in Canada, and it is much better
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEl9skiNc88

ftfy

Ryushikaze
Mar 5, 2013

Lady Naga posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVrVTinOsBw
We also got our own opening for the original Dragon Ball, which is equally amazing.

~friends working together~

It's like they wanted to Buttrock up the Gummi Bears lyrics both in tempo and content.

Aces High
Mar 26, 2010

Nah! A little chocolate will do




Lady Naga posted:

Dragon Ball Z got a different opener in Canada, and it is much worse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEl9skiNc88

say what you will about the Ocean dub for DBZ but it was loving hilarious...just not for the reasons they intended. Also I laugh at all the people flipping their poo poo over the censoring considering this was done in the era where Spider-Man couldn't beat anyone up and could only web them up

chiasaur11
Oct 22, 2012



Aces High posted:

say what you will about the Ocean dub for DBZ but it was loving hilarious...just not for the reasons they intended. Also I laugh at all the people flipping their poo poo over the censoring considering this was done in the era where Spider-Man couldn't beat anyone up and could only web them up

Why focus on Spider-Man when the same show had The Punisher and Carnage. A serial killer with knife-hands and Frank Castle ...didn't quite mesh well with 90s cartoon censorship.

Meanwhile, Batman could punch anyone he wanted. Different networks. Different standards.

claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

chiasaur11 posted:

Meanwhile, Batman could punch anyone he wanted. Different networks. Different standards.

Actually no. The reason a lot of fights involve flashes or are in silhouette is because they, too, could not show a punch connect. Exception: the robot episodes, if they let on first "yeah, this isn't a people"

SystemLogoff
Feb 19, 2011

End Session?

Are you going to make things easier for yourself and use the game's cheat code to start at level 16?

After showing off the horrors of the solo missions first of course. :v:

claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

SystemLogoff posted:

Are you going to make things easier for yourself and use the game's cheat code to start at level 16?

wait what

Robindaybird
Aug 21, 2007

Neat. Sweet. Petite.

chiasaur11 posted:

Why focus on Spider-Man when the same show had The Punisher and Carnage. A serial killer with knife-hands and Frank Castle ...didn't quite mesh well with 90s cartoon censorship.

Meanwhile, Batman could punch anyone he wanted. Different networks. Different standards.

or the Living Vampire couldn't bite people or take blood, he had to take "Plasma" through holes in his hands. There were some really weird workarounds.

Blockhouse
Sep 7, 2014

You Win!

welcome to the only way I beat this game

Lady Naga
Apr 25, 2008

Voyons Donc!

Aces High posted:

say what you will about the Ocean dub for DBZ but it was loving hilarious...just not for the reasons they intended. Also I laugh at all the people flipping their poo poo over the censoring considering this was done in the era where Spider-Man couldn't beat anyone up and could only web them up

Spider-Man also couldn't have real guns so they had these weird purple laser cannons. There is something rather feelbad about deliberately removing/obfuscating things from a show as opposed to intentionally working around them, though.

claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Getsuya posted:

Would it ruin the fun if I took a peek at the original Japanese version and pointed out what some of the more nonsensical translations were supposed to mean? I don't want to get all elitist and nitpick the whole thing but I'm just wondering if anyone's curious what some of those parts that straight up didn't make sense were actually supposed to be saying.

If you want to do this, I'd love to hear what some of this poo poo is in the original tongue.



Alright, gently caress it, let's do this. Last giant infodump post for a while. Let's meet the Inner Senshi, aka, the Sailors relating to the innermost planets of the solar system. In order they appear in the series, as opposed to this cutscene...

/
Ami Mizuno/Sailor Mercury

Ami is the best, and I say this entirely without bias*. She controls water and ice, is the brains of the operation, and tends to get pegged as "the weak one" due to a lot of her powers not being offensive in nature in the anime. In her human form she's possibly** probably the smartest youth in Japan, the daughter of a doctor and a painter, and a bookworm who would probably still be cloistered somewhere if Luna hadn't led Usagi to her and awakened her as Sailor Mercury. She's also sort of a pacifist, fighting in self-defense, but generally being the one who goes "Hey how about we hear so-and-so out before we all summon elemental death, what do you say".

/
Rei Hino/Sailor Mars

Rei is a shrine maiden who is one-quarter monster, according to the anime, explaining why she is a low level psychic and can perform divination with fire, her element. Two crows, Phobos and Deimos, follow her around as pseudo-familiars. These crows are aliens from a bird planet. This is canon. She butts heads with Usagi all the time and would 100% be Starscream***, constantly jockeying for leadership of the team, if she did not realize "Oh, Usagi controls the strongest weapon in the universe and it's bound to her bloodline". To say she is not fond of men would be putting it lightly, given that her father abandoned her, which is why she lives with her pervert grandfather at his shrine.

/
Makoto Kino/Sailor Jupiter

Makoto is the raw power player on the team. In her human form she's athletic enough to manhandle Youma, and, I poo poo you not, her first appearance and transformation in the manga ends with her electrocuting Nephrite to death with her very first attack. Do not gently caress with Makoto. You have probably already guessed she has electrical abilities, but she towers over the rest of the cast**** as the tallest, being of such 'giant proportion' she has to wear her former school's uniform, the one she attends with the cast doesn't have anything in her size. Despite this, she's probably the biggest homebody of the team, being an accomplished chef and a sucker for romance second only to...

/
Minako Aino/Sailor Venus/Sailor V

Minako is technically the first character to be active post-rebirth, and she actually had her own globe-trotting adventures prior to the Sailor Moon series in a short manga called "Codename: Sailor V". She straight up had her own side cast and everything. She's arguably the most fleshed out character because of this, unless you go by the anime, where she just sort of acts as "shittier Usagi" because they just go "SAILOR V!" once and I think maybe one episode elaborates on her pre-Venus adventures. Make no mistake, though, she seriously is proto-Usagi if you read that series. You'd think based on the above characters she'd get either wind or earth attacks, but no. She actually has a bunch of love-themed powers, by which I mean "attacks which are heart-shaped or consist of lines/beams/etc. of hearts". Remember when I said that two of Serenity and Endymion's guardians cock-blocked them? Venus was that figure on the Moon side of things.

Also she has the second talking cat, Artemis. Artemis shits on her so hard, he's the rear end in a top hat dad of the cat pair.

OKAY ON WITH THE GAME (until I stop for a minute to just poo poo on it again because this is a terrible introduction)

(running up to Rei's family shrine) Everyone! Transform! A Daimon came back to life in town!
Are the Death Busters back too?
Usagi, are you sure you didn't dream that?
Go screw, Rei. Ami belives me, right? (looking around) Ami is... not here to believe me.
(Ami walks onto screen a few seconds later)
Sorry, I came as fast as I could. I was talking to Urawa-kun.
...Okay, sure. Let's just go inside.



Okay, so, the next words in this conversation are totally going to relate to the danger in town, right?

Hahaha no this game is terrible.

It's been a long time since you've seen Urawa-kun, hasn't it?
He came to Tokyo for his holidays.
So where are you two going to go while he's in town?
Well, there are some national exams coming up, so... the library?



I feel that if this game were not half-assed there would be a facepalm sprite here for our heroines. But it is, so there isn't.

You want to go to the library with him?!
(simultaneously) Oh reeeeally...?
So what are your date plans after that?
Huh?! (blushing) It's not like that at all! We can't date... we're still in junior high!



Okay so I hate that "blushing" sprite right there (yes, that's what that is), and I doubly hate this dialogue. But we'll get there. Usagi asks again, despite this statement, "So where are you going?", and then Minako walks in.



And she has hearts in her dialogue randomly, because she's Sailor Venus, you see. Thankfully, they were all waiting for their last teammate to arrive before they talked about the crisis at ha-

What's wrong, Ami? Your face is crimson.
Hey, Ami's got a boyfriend! And he's coming here soon!
MAKOTO! It's not like that at all!



Oh my god thank you for stopping this. This is Yuuichirou. He also works at the shrine.

How're you all doing? (He walks over to Rei.) Rei, you look better than ever today!
(blushing) Th-thank you, Yuuichirou...
Well, see you all! (He exits.)
Sooooo, Rei...
Wh-what was that, Usagi? Why are you using that tone of voice?!
Because of what just happened. You and Yuuichirou are... great friends, right?
(I refuse to transcribe another ten lines of Rei and Usagi playing Dick Chicken.)
Well, who's YOUR boyfriend then, Usagi?
Who, me? It's Mamoru. We have a future kid. We're destined moon lovers.
(The entire room takes turns swooning or being jealous as Usagi blushes. Again, I refuse to transcribe this. It literally ends in Makoto and Minako going "I want a boyfriend." "Me too.")
Don't you have to go, Ami?
Ah! You're right! Thanks, Luna! See you all later! (She exits.)
So... we're gonna follow her, right?
That's... really mean.
...But I want to know.
It's settled! Yaaay!
(Everyone gets up to leave save Makoto.)
Aren't you coming?
I stand firm on this.
I'm worried about her.
Oh, alright, just this once.

I DIDN'T ALTER THOSE LAST FOUR LINES AT ALL.

So, let's just take a look at this. I want you to imagine that you have never dealt with this franchise before. Admittedly, you'd probably not be in that state going into this game. But pretend you have. This scene was straight up what every young idiot who went "Sailor Moon is for girls" was imagining in their head, and for some loving reason this is the very first thing we do to introduce our party.

Not only that, it is a motherfucking reach to be lovely in this way. Urawa-kun was a dude who appeared in two episodes of the anime. Yuuichirou was also only in the anime, and while he crushed on her hardcore, they were 'coworkers'. Every one of these five knows Usagi is going to shack up with Mamoru, because they've all babysat and fought alongside her kid. I'm not even going to be that dude who goes "this is bullshit because X, Y, and Z scenes and character moments", this whole scene is just bullshit writing. Usagi came up a few hours after fighting a time paradox and critically failed the Bechdel Test.

gently caress this game.

* Quote my wife upon seeing the tiny figurine shrine: "When we started dating I carried around a bunch of gadgets and I'm smarter than you. Is this your way of telling me you have a type?"
** Whether she took this role by brutally murdering anyone who trumps her in a test score is up for debate due to a silly side-story in the manga.
*** Other terrible references nearly used here: calling Usagi "Asian Phoenix"
**** Please try not to think too hard about proportions of the characters, especially between different incarnations, and because keep in mind despite the raw legginess of any character Takeuchi draws, they are all some weird-rear end heights according to "official materials". If I can find the chart that includes that stuff again I'll post it, it's hilarious with the actual numbers.

FractalSandwich
Apr 25, 2010

END ME SCOOB posted:

You'd think based on the above characters she'd get either wind or earth attacks, but no.
Or based on the Japanese names of the planets like Mercury and Mars, you'd expect her to have metal magic, but Jupiter already broke that pattern too.

100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer
Makoto towers over the rest of the scouts at a staggering 168cm (5'6").

Edvarius
Aug 23, 2013

END ME SCOOB posted:

She's also sort of a pacifist, fighting in self-defense, but generally being the one who goes "Hey how about we hear so-and-so out before we all summon elemental death, what do you say".

To be fair, none of the girls are ever happy about asking the one whose element is Death to do anything.

Endorph
Jul 22, 2009

100 HOGS AGREE posted:

Makoto towers over the rest of the scouts at a staggering 168cm (5'6").
Japanese people are short as hell. she's got like 4 inches on the average grown woman in japan, and she's young enough to still be growing.

That said, the way people react to her is pretty exaggerated. She's tall but she's not like 5'10'' or something.

Endorph fucked around with this message at 13:40 on Jun 9, 2016

MechaCrash
Jan 1, 2013

It looks like Ami and Makoto got redrawn entirely for Sailor Mercury and Sailor Jupiter, but turning Rei and Minako into Sailor Mars and Sailor Venus was just an edit job. I'm curious why, especially because it looks like Ami and Makoto have lighter hair once they transformed. Was that deliberate, or a technical limitation?

Makoto's elemental association of wood does sort of come through. Aren't there oak leaves when she uses some of her attacks? I know in the live action one they had her do some magical sensing thing and showed trees rustling in the wind.

As a brief fill-in for those wondering: Japan has a different element system, which is Fire, Wood, Water, Metal, and Earth. Jupiter is associated with wood (as I recall its name means "wood star" in Japanese). If you want to know more, ask someone who knows.

a cartoon duck
Sep 5, 2011

END ME SCOOB posted:

You'd think based on the above characters she'd get either wind or earth attacks, but no.

I mean, she does have a "Venus Sulfur Smoke" attack in the Sailor V manga, so there's that. Summoning giant fart clouds just isn't much of a team attack is all.

Mootiman
May 9, 2005
Sailor Venus has this weird Flowers for Algernon thing going where she seems to get progressively dumber over the course of the anime to distinguish herself from Sailor Moon. She kind of starts as this independent and cool role model and...well the game will do the rest.

Edvarius
Aug 23, 2013
I wouldn't say Minako becomes dumber, she just has a tendency to think with what she's got between her legs, and is active while Usagi is more lazy and weepy.

FractalSandwich
Apr 25, 2010

MechaCrash posted:

As a brief fill-in for those wondering: Japan has a different element system, which is Fire, Wood, Water, Metal, and Earth. Jupiter is associated with wood (as I recall its name means "wood star" in Japanese). If you want to know more, ask someone who knows.
You recall correctly. The five classical Indo-European elements are recognised as well, but the Chinese Five Phases are what the classical planets are named after (and the days of the week, by extension) so that's what you get here.

FractalSandwich fucked around with this message at 14:31 on Jun 9, 2016

Revenant Threshold
Jan 1, 2008
Sailor Moon is one of those weird areas for me because the only version of it I've ever experienced any of is this one.

Thuryl
Mar 14, 2007

My postillion has been struck by lightning.

END ME SCOOB posted:

/
Ami Mizuno/Sailor Mercury

Ami is the best, and I say this entirely without bias*. She controls water and ice, is the brains of the operation, and tends to get pegged as "the weak one" due to a lot of her powers not being offensive in nature in the anime.

I accidentally got a friend to start marathon-watching the anime a few days ago, and he observed that the senshi are actually way more likely to get their asses kicked in a fight whenever Mercury doesn't lead off with her bubble attack.

Also, in her early drafts of the manga, Naoko Takeuchi originally planned for her to be a cyborg and to be killed off permanently at the end of the first story arc. Neither of those things ended up happening.

EclecticTastes
Sep 17, 2012

"Most plans are critically flawed by their own logic. A failure at any step will ruin everything after it. That's just basic cause and effect. It's easy for a good plan to fall apart. Therefore, a plan that has no attachment to logic cannot be stopped."

MechaCrash posted:

Makoto's elemental association of wood does sort of come through. Aren't there oak leaves when she uses some of her attacks? I know in the live action one they had her do some magical sensing thing and showed trees rustling in the wind.

Having recently watched some of the Sailor Stars arc, I can confirm that Jupiter does eventually get a wood-themed attack, "Jupiter Oak Evolution". This is what this thread has done to me so far.

100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer
Minako using metal kind of makes sense, since chains are made of metal and one of her attacks is Wink Chain Sword.

Doesn't explain Crescent Beam though.

100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer

Revenant Threshold posted:

Sailor Moon is one of those weird areas for me because the only version of it I've ever experienced any of is this one.

That's hosed up man. But you did get the best version of Mercury (when she's evil).

Chimera-gui
Mar 20, 2014
Technically wind goes to Haruka AKA Sailor Uranus Ami shares the water element with Michiru AKA Sailor Neptune.

FractalSandwich
Apr 25, 2010
I pick up this show back up where I left off and the first thing that happens is Jadeite gets crushed by a rogue airliner on an airport runway and Liam O'Brien shows up to replace him as the next villain. So good.

C-Euro
Mar 20, 2010

:science:
Soiled Meat
Getting some heavy SNES/GBA Fire Emblem vibes from these facial sprites. That's probably just the whole anime thing, though.

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100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer

Chimera-gui posted:

Technically wind goes to Haruka AKA Sailor Uranus Ami shares the water element with Michiru AKA Sailor Neptune.

Uranus seemed more like Earth than wind, her first attack is Earth Shaking.

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