Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

«‹›6665 »

atxsperg: Jan 29, 2016; I like cats for their cuddles, but hate the boxes of shit.

thatguy posted:

Ya but then the big mocap companies will be trying to control Chris's vision.

lets be honest, its so he can rub one out in the bathroom thinking of getting back in with hollywood.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:05

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 19, 2024 22:56

atxsperg: Jan 29, 2016; I like cats for their cuddles, but hate the boxes of shit.

Hillary Clintons Thong posted:

still will look worse than the chick from Half Life 2

half life 2 episode 2 alex is a loving monument to making a realistic character in a video game. i really cant think of any better examples. All the little mannerisms, the facial animation, the little ticks... all just so perfect.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:07

thatguy: Feb 5, 2003

I made this for the thread, do with it what you will:

If I were less lazy I would change the colors from blue to red and orange and then make all the computers on fire and then it would brighten into a white screen and then it would say something funny about how everything is working out fine.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:07

atxsperg: Jan 29, 2016; I like cats for their cuddles, but hate the boxes of shit.

thatguy posted:

I made this for the thread, do with it what you will:

If I were less lazy I would change the colors from blue to red and orange and then make all the computers on fire and then it would brighten into a white screen and then it would say something funny about how everything is working out fine.

looks like GRU from the back.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:08

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

Proof that goons skip pages in this thread:

ewe2 posted:

Kill jester

Samizdata posted:

But I want to kill the jester! What page is that?

orcinus posted:

Kill Jester.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:09

alf_pogs: Feb 15, 2012

thatguy posted:

I made this for the thread, do with it what you will:

If I were less lazy I would change the colors from blue to red and orange and then make all the computers on fire and then it would brighten into a white screen and then it would say something funny about how everything is working out fine.

if i had skills i would make it so he was walking through a ~~very expensive~~ diy sliding door that looks like a spaceship

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:09

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

alf_pogs posted:

if i had skills i would make it so he was walking through a ~~very expensive~~ diy sliding door that looks like a spaceship

He would need to stand there and aim a garage door opener at the door since that is what it was made with.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:18

Blue On Blue: Nov 14, 2012

thatguy posted:

I made this for the thread, do with it what you will:

If I were less lazy I would change the colors from blue to red and orange and then make all the computers on fire and then it would brighten into a white screen and then it would say something funny about how everything is working out fine.

I hope some day I can become a millionaire and dress like a 15 year old

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:18

Tortolia: Dec 29, 2005; Hindustan Electronics Employee of the Month, July 2008; Grimey Drawer

Sappo569 posted:

I hope some day I can become a millionaire and dress like a 15 year old

Fake it until you make it

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:22

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

I decided to take a trip down memory lane on another fourms SC thread. These are the choice quotes from way back in October 2012.

quote:

Well, thats a wee bit ambitious.
Sounds like it should be renamed Star Citizen 3000.

quote:

Is the pony a pre-order bonus or day one DLC?

quote:

Yeah, sounds like a Derek Smart game.

quote:

If this gets to a playable alpha state with even half these features I'll be sure to chip in my debens. Until then, absolutely not.
Maaaybe I'd cut him a break and chip in early stage if there was a more honest feature list on offer, but this just reeks of bullshit pandering to get the biggest cash pile possible.

quote:

I'll call that list feature creep, but it's more like a Katamari Damacy style feature ball at this point.
I'm going to bet this won't end well for anyone other than Brian Rubin.

quote:

Why do I live in a world where people are giving the guy who made WC3, WC4, some poo poo that I'm surely forgetting, the pale shadow of Privateer that was Freelancer, and Wing Commander the motherfuckin' movie starring Freddie Prinze Jr. money?

quote:

Nostalgia.
And promises of ponies.

quote:

As much as I'd like to see this game, I'm not putting money into this one because it doesn't seem reasonable. I'll buy it if it ever comes out.

quote:

this is merely hearsay, but according to someone I'm working with(he worked with Chris), Chris Robert is not a person to be trusted with money at all, at one time he spent all his company's deadline money on a Jaguar, and then proceed to ask for more money because he can't paid anyone. After he started Digital Anvil, Microsoft gave him around 40 million to make a game, unfortunately in the contract it only stipulate "entertainment", so he spent the money making that lovely wing commander movie.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:24

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

MarcusSA posted:

I decided to take a trip down memory lane on another fourms SC thread. These are the choice quotes from way back in October 2012.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbkZbeAv_UM :nws:

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:25

JazzPaws: Aug 10, 2014; - Ponzi Scheme Survivor -

Decrepus posted:

lol at all of those other "actors" facing the camera. Sandi is truly the only one who understands photo development.

e: that over the shoulder shot makes her look like a brachiosaurus from Jurassic Park

I was thinking, more like the hybrid alien at the end of "Alien Resurrection" uncanny facial resemblance....seriously.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:26

Toops: Nov 5, 2015; -find mood stabilizers
-also,

Awesome! posted:

i remember when this revelation was the thing that was going to bring down star citizen. what happened there?

From that moment forward, CIG really turned it around and now Star Citizen is going very well, thank you for asking.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:27

Sankis: Mar 8, 2004; But I remember the fella who told me. Big lad. Arms as thick as oak trees, a stunning collection of scars, nice eye patch. A REAL therapist he was. Er wait. Maybe it was rapist?

spacetoaster posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbkZbeAv_UM

why the gently caress did i click this

why the gently caress did i click this and scrub through it

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:33

alf_pogs: Feb 15, 2012

Colostomy Bag posted:

He would need to stand there and aim a garage door opener at the door since that is what it was made with.

fair enough! i myself do not work in door development and have no understanding of it

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:33

alf_pogs: Feb 15, 2012

spacetoaster posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbkZbeAv_UM

this isn't a trip down memory lane so much as somewhere much worse

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:34

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

Sankis posted:

why the gently caress did i click this

why the gently caress did i click this and scrub through it

Not empty quoting....

Jesus gently caress man.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:38

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Sankis posted:

why the gently caress did i click this

why the gently caress did i click this and scrub through it

alf_pogs posted:

this isn't a trip down memory lane so much as somewhere much worse

It is. I can't exactly remember why we had that in this thread, but that dude is either a backer or the stimpire's minister of school lunches.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:40

CHICKEN SHOES: Oct 4, 2002; Slippery Tilde

I still don't know if bunnyman, making GBS threads on a toilet guy, or I NAMED MY KID GUNNAR AND HE WILL BE MY GUNNER IN SC picture guy is the worst

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:44

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

ManofManyAliases posted:

No - not just because they say so. Could it be that there are over 150 people in two locations and no dissent among them? I mean, if there was no work or no progression, wouldn't there be more of a mass exodus? Or - at the least - wouldn't there be more outward communication portraying CIG in a negative light? Discord and forums are literally full of developers and designers saying (this is what I'm working on now, and this is what's going on, we're building this, etc..). Are those all strategic and well-placed lies?

I notice you are again ignoring the guy with a very valid point about how that's not how game development works. You eternally talk past people you can't argue with and only reply to people you can.

ManofManyAliases posted:

Yes - I have, and I can't think that a person who is under such public scrutiny would be so blatant as to take 100+ mil and say 'gently caress all of you' without knowing there are going to be serious repercussions.

THEY DO IT ALL THE TIME! Have you heard of any financial scandal ever? There's plenty of them! How about any large-scale kickstarter failure? Plenty of those! You can't think of things that there exist examples of somehow.

Lazrin posted:

and how is that any different from what you do? you keep talking just to convince yourself when there's no tangible evidence of anything in this circle jerk being true.

Sorry, you're more boring than MOMA.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:46

alf_pogs: Feb 15, 2012

Hillary Clintons Thong posted:

I still don't know if bunnyman, making GBS threads on a toilet guy, or I NAMED MY KID GUNNAR AND HE WILL BE MY GUNNER IN SC picture guy is the worst

there are a lot of tied positions in this game

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:48

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

alf_pogs posted:

fair enough! i myself do not work in door development and have no understanding of it

That's ok commando. Join my org, and every Wednesday night we can go over basic mechanics of my jpegs. No need to thank me, I know I'm giving you a job in the verse and well that is more than most would do.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:49

thatguy: Feb 5, 2003

Just need to find some little fire animations to put all over the desks and windows.
https://fat.gfycat.com/EasygoingAcademicDuiker.webm

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:52

thatguy: Feb 5, 2003

Post funny things it should say at the end and I'll do it tomorrow.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:52

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

thatguy posted:

Post funny things it should say at the end and I'll do it tomorrow.

parp

# ? Jun 22, 2016 05:59

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

thatguy posted:

Post funny things it should say at the end and I'll do it tomorrow.

Ben Lesnick, Developer

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:01

MedicineHut: Feb 25, 2016

ManofManyAliases posted:

I just want to wait a little longer to see. That's all I'm asking. If it happens, and I was right all along, then I'll be happy for the 'investment." If not, lesson learned: don't pledge so early without more proof of hard delivery.

The curse of "reasonable" doubt...

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:09

Klyith: Aug 3, 2007; GBS Pledge Week

Madcosby posted:

As for the CIG employees, I'd love to work at a place that has no deadlines. I'd turn in the MVP worth of work a week and laugh my rear end off at my job. I imagine that's what 90% of their employees are doing.

A thing that's often said about video game jobs is that the #1 thing to have on your resume is shipped games. If they're good games so much the better, but the most important thing is that they got finished. Review scores & sales are a big deal at the management level, for the regular employees not so much.

And if you know anything about the economics of game publishing, you'd see why this is so. Even a crappy game that reviews badly and bombs* in the charts will often make back it's development cost. Or nearly so, eventually, after years of bargain bin sales. Even SWTOR will earn out it's ludicrous budget. Games that can't or don't sell are the financial disasters, and none more so than something canceled after millions of dollars spent.

So if I was a CIG employee, and I had the opportunity to get hired somewhere else, I'd absolutely jump ship. But if I didn't have the resume to get a better job -- and in the UK right now that's a lot of people -- I'd absolutely be polishing my portfolio for an hour a day and jerking off the rest of the time.

_{^{*merely bad games, particularly in the AAA space, do most of their damage to the sequel / franchise potential. which is money that publishers really count on to make up for the failed experiments.}}

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:13

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

The New Narrative CIG Should Be Afraid of posted:

Despite a big fuss being made over Activision not having a booth at E3 2016, the savvier among us recognized that this didn�t mean that they wouldn�t be present at all. Activision was around, of course, and they were set up in their own set of meeting rooms with demo reels for Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare and Skylanders: Imaginators, both of which I dropped by to check out.

A publisher with the kind of financial muscle and industry influence that Activision can bring to bear doesn�t play around with its biggest franchises, and we saw that in full force here. Activision may not have had a regular booth at E3, but they were certainly there, in force.

Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare turned out to be one of the biggest surprises for me at E3 2016. Yes, I know, it�s Call of Duty; how could that be surprising at all? It turns out that with Infinite Warfare, Activision might actually be taking the series in a new and fascinating direction, something like a more action-based Mass Effect.

The demo opened with your standard Call of Duty run-and-gunning. It�s the sci-fi flavor of Call of Duty run-and-gunning this time around, as we�ve seen in the past few games since Advanced Warfare. Before long, though, gruff military hero Captain Reyes calls in his ship, the Jackal, and takes off into space for some Star Wars-style dogfighting. The action flows smoothly in and out of the ship, with Reyes embarking and disembarking as the situation demands; we watch as he infiltrates an enemy ship by landing nearby, blasting open the bridge windows and swooping in, for instance.

Later in the trailer, we find that Reyes commands his own larger ship. Much like Mass Effect, this comes with a starmap that can be used to determine your next location. Yes, insofar as I could tell based on a non-playable vertical slice, it looks like this is going to be a Call of Duty with open-world elements where you can decide for yourself where to go and what missions to take on next. That just might be what it takes to give this franchise a new level of depth�but is the Call of Duty name going to scare off gamers who are looking for that kind of depth?

Either way, you can guarantee that Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare is going to sell like gangbusters when it drops on November 4th. What�s more, as a space-themed game it�s intruding on a space � pun intended � that�s gradually becoming more and more crowded thanks to the return of the Star Wars film franchise and the runaway success of Star Citizen�s neverending crowdfunding campaign. Comparisons are already being made between Infinite Warfare and Star Citizen�s single-player facet known as Squadron 42, where the latter is a story all its own � it was originally intended to be at E3 before Cloud Imperium Games pulled out at the last second, raising all kinds of uncomfortable questions about where the endless stream of crowdfunded money is going. We might end up seeing a battle between the Big Evil Publishers � and the Small Scrappy Indies �, and what�s going to happen if the evil publishers deliver a better product?

----

THE GOOD NEWS & THE BAD NEWS

The good news for CIG is that this very sharp write-up appeared on a low-traffic site of no particular influence.

The bad news is that the narrative posited in the closing paragraph is so now incredibly obvious and irresistible that it will surely have occurred to more than just rogue outlier bloggers and our present gathering of Star Citizen analysts, satirists and prognostications.

There is no narrative more explosive and dangerous, more fraught with the potential to lead to an overnight reversal of fortune than this. Unfortunately for Chris, the Gaming Press, for all their storied timidity, has an especially cozy relationship with the AAA Publisher & Gaming Development Complex. They are, generally speaking, supplicants of industry, their existence largely derived from the largesse of AAA advertising budgets.

There need be no direct order, broadcast by shadowy cabals in smoke-filled rooms, to destroy anything or anyone. It is the notion itself, so ironic and unexpected yet so right-sounding, that has the power to completely dismantle the central organizing principle of Star Citizen itself. If this same conclusion is declared by a major outlet like the increasingly prickly Polygon, it will spread like wildfire through the tributary gaming outlets and REMAIN. And it isn't really a question of "if" but "when" -- because the promotional drumbeat for Infinite Warfare is beating, beating, beating and it will not stop, it will only grow faster and louder in the months leading up to their November launch.

The burden has never been so great for Chris Roberts to prove the distinct competitive merits of this unprecedented experiment in consumer-funded, publisher-free, creator-centric game development. Yet so far as we can see, he's never been less prepared to do that.

G0RF fucked around with this message at 06:21 on Jun 22, 2016

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:15

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Hillary Clintons Thong posted:

I still don't know if bunnyman, making GBS threads on a toilet guy, or I NAMED MY KID GUNNAR AND HE WILL BE MY GUNNER IN SC picture guy is the worst

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:20

CHICKEN SHOES: Oct 4, 2002; Slippery Tilde

spacetoaster posted:

gently caress everything. I always used to think I saw the worst garbage people in the army but nope. You're MP right? you know what I mean. these fuckers celebrate their childs birth with a card from an imaginary videogame :smithicide:

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:23

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Hillary Clintons Thong posted:

gently caress everything. I always used to think I saw the worst garbage people in the army but nope. You're MP right? you know what I mean. these fuckers celebrate their childs birth with a card from an imaginary videogame

I don't really do "MP" work anymore. But yeah.

Years ago when I did actually do law and order I saw a lot of horrible stuff.

Before I came to SA I didn't think someone could be as "into" something on as large a scale as these people. It really should be made into some kind of documentary.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:27

Samizdata: May 14, 2007

ewe2 posted:

Proof that goons skip pages in this thread:

Not me. I read them all. I wish I didn't, but I did. Sometimes I don't always track stuff in order, however, due to the masses of data (and all the Stimperial lore I have socked away).

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:34

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

What is the latest story with the Austin office?

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:35

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

Samizdata posted:

Not me. I read them all. I wish I didn't, but I did. Sometimes I don't always track stuff in order, however, due to the masses of data (and all the Stimperial lore I have socked away).

Amateur. Some of us read it twice.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:36

SelenicMartian: Sep 14, 2013; Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Is Pusher's hair mocapped?

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:38

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

A Neurotic Jew posted:

https://twitter.com/SandiGardiner/status/745411431852453888

How the gently caress did they manage to trick crob into greenlighting static mesh hair?

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:46

SelenicMartian: Sep 14, 2013; Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

How the gently caress did they manage to trick crob into greenlighting static mesh hair?

That's exactly the thing he'd greenlight.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:50

less than three: Aug 9, 2007; Fallen Rib

Pusher is Sandi so probably nobody dared to question anything. Pusher has the best hair and has ever since she was a little girl.

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:51

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 19, 2024 22:56

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

Samizdata posted:

Not me. I read them all. I wish I didn't, but I did. Sometimes I don't always track stuff in order, however, due to the masses of data (and all the Stimperial lore I have socked away).

just thought it was an amusing thing to point out, and also that kill jester has true pop culture reach :pgabz:

# ? Jun 22, 2016 06:53

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

«‹›6665 »