du -hast posted:

Does anyone have that quote that's maybe a eulogy of I think Strom Thurmond?

I remember specifically one line that went something like "and America had to determine how much we should hate niggers ("A whole lot", Thurmond contends")" or something to that effect.

Some poster, not sure who posted:

This week the shriveled husk of million term United States Senator and malevolent lich Jesse Helms was sealed in a bleak crypt deep beneath the sands of his native Stygia, North Carolina. Flowers placed on his grave by grieving shitheads withered and died within seconds.

Helms, known to friends and slaves alike as an unredeemed racist, was famous in the Senate for his passionate defense of segregation, opposition to the civil and voting rights acts, and his black crusade against the sun and all things which draw life from it.

As one of the first conservative talk radio hosts of the 1960’s Helms pioneered the technique of getting poor stupid whites to vote against their own interests by tricking them into hulking the gently caress out over black people, immigrants, and the betrayal of the Confederacy by jews, liberals, and the hated abstract concept of literacy. He went on to parley his repulsive backwoods celebrity with the curbstomp set into a long career in government where he played a prominent role in the unbelievably vicious and petty dixiecrat movement. His leadership resulted in a fundamental realignment of the American domestic political scene over the question of just how much we should hate niggers (”A whole lot”, contended Helms).

Long considered a strong contender for “worst person in the entire world” Helms in his declining years began to find that limited title constraining. Last summer recess he gathered together all the educated mulattos and wizened negro shaman from the swamps and dungeons of his grim feudal demesne and began a search for the blackest of black tomes, arts, and metal. That search culminated last week in his ascension to lichdom with the completion of a vile phylactery in the form of a fat lipped bejeweled bone sambo, pulsating with false life and the rhythm of hot jungle beats. His triumph over death itself coincides with a departure from this plane of existence for the astral realms, where he will spend the next thousand years pursuing recognition as the “worst person in the entire metaverse.”

Here on Earth Helms will be remembered as a southern gentleman, a family man, and the kind of guy that’ll eventually turn out to have dozens of child sized skeletons buried in his yard and whose family members when interviewed will say they thought he just liked collecting tiny shoes.

Masked Pumpkin posted:

quote:

I just want to remind everyone of something.

One of the most loathsome people to ever loving live on this planet, Ted Cruz, backstabbed and hosed over every person he came in contact with for the past four years, forced his party into a bunch of no-win scenarios that made them look stupid and clueless, and generally called out everyone in his entire party as a bunch of commiesymp Islamolibs who want to dress up as a gay-married woman and gently caress a child in a public bathroom. He did all of these things knowingly, burning every bridge he's ever crossed, mauling every hand that's ever fed him, all in service of one dream: He would become the Republican nominee in 2016 and win the Presidency and then the trail of blood and nightmares he left behind wouldn't matter because gently caress you I'm POTUS that's why.

He sacrificed everything to this goal, and he's going to lose to the political equivalent of the Fukushima meltdown. His strategy would (probably) have worked! It's pretty clear that the JEB! never stood a chance regardless of how much money he raised because he's a loving walking Ambien who conservatives thoroughly despise, Scott Walker couldn't even figure out how to hire someone who understood things like "a budget," Ben Carson looks like an attractive candidate up until he has to speak in anything other than meaningless fortune-cookie platitudes, etc. All that work, all that planning, all that treachery, all that time.

ALL FOR loving NOTHING AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

He's been reaching for this brass ring his entire life, leaning farther and farther out from his carousel horse. What would he lose first, his balance, or his nerve? But he never flinched, leaning out further and further with each turn of the carousel, and then just before, just before his fingertip brushed it a tiny orange hand came out of nowhere and took that bitch right away from him, right in front of him, and there was never anything he could do to stop it. Now all that's left is the fall.

There aren't words in any language to describe the joy it brings me to see such a heinous, hateful motherfucker destroyed in such a gut-wrenching, miserable way. Tonight was the beginning of Ted Cruz's descent to a talk radio host saying things like, "Well, when I was in the United States Senate, let me tell you..."

Ted is a mess. Ted is a waste.

Chichevache posted:

The word filter really makes that post.

Chichevache posted:

The word filter really makes that post.

Hermetic posted:

I am sorry, but you are addressing HERMETIC, the corporation created by Lowtax when I signed up for this forum. I, Hermetic, the sovereign poster do not enter into a joinder to agree to these rules about "derails", and will protect myself from attempts to violate my freedom by any means necessary.

Now, I think that tipping 15% is generally just a courtesy. If you can't afford the tip, you can't afford the meal. Also, all police are terrible, and Bernie would have been a better candidate for the Dems than Hillary.

Otisburg posted:

There is no gold fringe on this thread so I can post about how circumcision is actually good and cool.

The Ape of Naples posted:

How much should one tip a Mohel?

Rick_Hunter posted:

With...the tip?

Karate Bastard posted:

The word filters are really on point these days hth

cheerfullydrab posted:

The only problem with that Jesse Helms quote is how it directly steals a Bill Hicks joke about Jesse Helms. Mangles it, too.

Like you can be funny without poorly quoting other people and passing their words off as your own, that's a thing.

Guy Mann posted:

Lifting Bill Hicks jokes is a net good because it means people get to enjoy a joke without having to look at or listen to Bill Hicks.

Airborne Viking posted:

I posted on page 3 and never got banned.

Someone called it out, and I still didn't get banned.


Since then I've been racking up probations and even doxxed that nightshift supreme guy who keeps spamming his lovely youtube channel. But no matter what I do, I never get banned. I wander the forums, watching the people around me fall one by one. I wonder if someday around the corner my number will be up. My friends weren't spared. But I was. I curse lowtax for making me carry this burden. Am I supposed to just go home, and tell everyone what happened here? IS THAT WHAT HE WANTS ME TO DO?!

So I wander the forums. I tell my story to whoever will listen. I am a reminder. A warning. I make sure that the world never forgets.

Because I am invincible.

sebzilla posted:

My partner and daughter are Welsh so it's a good time in the sebzilla household. Suck it up Englandailures!

Tortuga posted:

IS Welsh. Your partner and daughter IS Welsh.

frankenfreak posted:

frankenfreak posted:

cheerfullydrab posted:

You probably don't like Bill Hicks because you think he was a comedian.

frankenfreak posted:

Free Market Mambo posted:

The Strom Thurmond post is by Autopsy-Turvy, pbuh.

bulletsponge13 posted:

While checking out in the grocers, I overheard three suburban moms loudly exclaiming the virtues of Taco Lasagna. One said to add a layer or two of "real Taco Bell" to make it taste "OMG amazing!"

I'm not saying they aren't right, but they were losing their god drat minds, and I am sure posting pictures of their off color mess on Facebook.

TontoCorazon posted:

It's almost as bad as people touting proudly making "homemade subway sandwiches". As in the goddamn franchise Subway.

Pomp posted:

"real taco bell" is upsetting me

The General posted:

Never. Ever. Buy Taco Bell out of the trunk of someone's car.

sweeperbravo posted:

Sounds like something Blue Story would have posted about but not had the energy to try

sweeperbravo posted:

Sounds like something Blue Story would have posted about but not had the energy to try

Guy Mann posted:

Lifting Bill Hicks jokes is a net good because it means people get to enjoy a joke without having to look at or listen to Bill Hicks.

A GLISTENING HODOR posted:

Stealing from Bill Hicks is cool because gently caress him.

sweeperbravo posted:

She got bannaed and as far as I am aware never returned, that was the end of the gimmick/show. Something made me think of her today. I hadn't in a while. I really thought I was going to have an automatic association with Star Wars and her whole show but I really forgot about her for the past few months. The whole situation was just really bizarre, even if it was faked it was a really dedicated long con.


I think I caught sight of the calendar and seemed to remember the whole thing started sometime last July, or maybe that's when it was starting to pick up steam.

Centripetal Horse posted:

Ah, so we're in a legitimate Hicks down-cycle? I thought opinions on Hicks were starting to trend upward, again, but maybe that was just a dead Hicks bounce.

Paladinus posted:

Oh man. Is she still around? Does the baby enjoy hamburger-flavoured milk?

BOOTY-ADE posted:

Two sweaty fatboobs leaking spoiled whipping cream

A GLISTENING HODOR posted:

There's no trend with Hicks, there's just a steady supply of teenagers who think his observations are earth shattering because they're dumb teens.

And much like Ayn Rand, Nietschze, and Monty Python, LOL if you don't grow out of that poo poo by like 20.

DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:

a magical poster. i remember his Serbia LP fondly

HoAssHo posted:

She came back for a while after her initial ban to tell us that she had gestational diabetes lmao


edit: oh and to the shock of no one, the baby was premature or there was something wrong with it, I don't remember exactly.

Helpful person posted:

I considered both during my pregnancy, which was unplanned and occurred while I was taking medication that's really best not taken during pregnancy, a moderate smoker, and the worst, most pickiest eater on the planet. I had to go far, far, far outside my comfort zone to quit smoking cold, taper down the medication as fast as possible, and change my diet and my exercise habits. I used my ability to change during my pregnancy as a way to measure if I should adopt out. If you're at 32 weeks and nothing's changed, you should strongly consider it. You should also stop drinking two cans of soda a day because it makes you feel lovely, believe it or not. Nevermind the potential for gestational diabetes. If you still need a flavor-overload because you're used to things with so much base flavor you find non-salty, non-super-sugared food bland, get those little squeezy things of flavor for water. There are ones without artificial sweeteners. I used those and lemonade with the recommended amount of sugar to get water into myself for the first few months of pregnancy, then it was summer and I could taste things again and water was delicious.

Bluestory posted:

Hi! Dropping in to mention that it is great that this thread is in GWS now, as I was just diagnosed with gestational diabetes last week. Which means that I can't eat the vast majority of fast food and froofy sandwiches anymore. No more juice, no more massive amounts of apples, no more massive amounts of bread and pasta products. No more potatoes or rice. Any lazy low-carb recipes are appreciated! By low carb I mean based on my blood sugar measurements last week I need to be under 40 carbs per meal to keep my glucose level below 120 an hour after eating, which is what the nurse instructed. I'm already eating roasted brussel sprouts and mushrooms for dinner.

There have been other non-food updates but I suppose I should save those for more appropriate forums?

A GLISTENING HODOR posted:

There's no trend with Hicks, there's just a steady supply of teenagers who think his observations are earth shattering because they're dumb teens.

And much like Ayn Rand, Nietschze, and Monty Python, LOL if you don't grow out of that poo poo by like 20.

A GLISTENING HODOR posted:

There's no trend with Hicks, there's just a steady supply of teenagers who think his observations are earth shattering because they're dumb teens.

And much like Ayn Rand, Nietschze, and Monty Python, LOL if you don't grow out of that poo poo by like 20.